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MUPPETGASM

By | Pajiba Love | November 9, 2010 | Comments ()


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Entertainment Weekly has the first look at Jason Segel's new Muppet movie, and I won't lie, I just peed myself a tiny bit in excitement. Like a chihuahua. Anyway, just take a look at it and see if you don't urinate just a tiny bit yourself. (Screen Junkies)

Kat Dennings, who I absolutely adore because she's adorable and quirky and awesome, had some topless cell phone pics leaked onto the web and you've stopped reading this and clicked the link already, haven't you? No, no, that's fine. I had a really good joke lined up (no I didn't) but now you're never gonna hear it because you only care about tits. (Yeeeah!)

Today's quiz is all about The Beatles, and quick confession here... I don't really care about The Beatles. Seriously, when you grow up hearing about how great The Beatles are from everyone ever, after a while they just annoy you. Sorry guys; it's not you, it's me. (Litely Salted)

Because Dina Lohan needs to put food vodka on her table tongue, she went on the Today show to lie to Matt Lauer again about how she always knew Lindsay was an addict but kept it quiet for her daughter's sake. (popbytes)

Presented without comment: Bread People, the tumblr devoted to bread-based name puns. Actually, now I want a biscuit. Does that count as a comment? Damn you Bread People for making me hungry! (Bread People)

So it looks like Martin Sheen has been confirmed to play Uncle Ben in the upcoming Spider-Man reboot. Quick question, but am I the only one who hears "Uncle Ben" and thinks "I love his rice!"? (The Flickcast)

Just in case you're all wondering what Charlie Sheen thinks about that whole silly "Getting drunk, naked and high while destroying a hotel room and screaming the n-word while a pornstar is hiding in your closet all because you think she stole your watch" thing... Well, he thinks you should all just chill out already. Jeez cut him some slack! (Evil Beet)

Did anybody catch that segment on The Daily Show about Andrew Shirvell, the assistant Attorney General from Michigan who stalked and slandered the Chris Armstrong, the president of the Michigan Student Assembly, for being gay? Well he got fired, because apparently assistant Attorney Generals probably shouldn't be doing illegal things. Who knew? (Towleroad)

You know those shoes that apparently give you a full gym workout just by walking around in them? Yeah, well those don't actually do anything. At all. Ha! Sorry, looks like your flat-ass just paid extra to walk around in useless, ugly bubble shoes. (Zelda Lily)

Move over, guy who guessed the exact price of the showcase on The Price is Right, we've got a new seriously random game show winner: Meet the lady who guessed the puzzle right on Wheel of Fortune with only one freaking letter on the board. (Frothy Girlz)

Do you love Cookie Monster? Well, how about being able to sleep at night? Prepare to have both ruined for you with the help of realistic Cookie Monster! (Unreality)

Because there's nothing people love more than a processed, meat-like substance on a bread-ish loaf, McDonald's has decided to honour the McRibs biggest fans, or as I like to call them, future heart attack-victims. (Asylum)

Did you know that Baby Otters are made out of 100% pure concentrated cuteness? Seriously, watch these little guys swim and see if you don't go "awwwwwww!"

Jeremy Feist is a freelance writer, maker of lovin', and an average-everyday-sane-psycho. You can check his NSFW blog here, or email him here.



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