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Women Have Feelings Too, May I Share Mine With You?

Pajiba Love / Stacey Nosek

Pajiba Love | September 5, 2008 | Comments (135)

My boyfriend found this by doing internet research to try to figure out why women cry so much, after I cried yesterday because I found out I can’t get lasik surgery. (WhyWomenCry)

On the subjects of crybabies, Kanye West is ending his year-long boycott of the VMAs. Just in time for the VMAs, too! (WIMB)

Katharine Heigl makes cute puppies fear for their lives. (IDLYITW)

OK, so we here at Pajiba are a liberal-leaning website. Obviously. But that doesn’t mean I can’t be fair, so here is a respected, Republican member of our blogging community on why liberals hate Palin. But really, of course we’re antagonizing! Do you people even remember impeaching Clinton? (First Things)

And on that note, back to our regularly scheduled Governor Peggy Hill bashing. (Deus Ex Malcontent)

JESUS. How many hugely embarrassing political gaffes are going to have to happen before stupid politicians stop using Paris Hilton in their smear ads? (Celebslam)

Our own Sarina has been helping out over at Yeeeah!, with the expected hilarious results. (Yeeeah!)

Olbermann totally loses his shit after the RNC coverage started smearing 9/11 in everyones faces again. (QuizLaw)

So this specifically pertains to breast cancer… But I’m dedicating it to my girl AlaPink anyway. Yeah!! Fuck a cancer!!! (YBNBY)

If you haven’t been keeping up, the finale of the web series “The Legend of Neil” is now online; which of course is the classic story of a man who gets drunk and wakes up in The Legend of Zelda. (atom)

When faced with a zombie infestation, don’t be caught with your pants down, holding some beat-ass KMart BB gun. (ZombieForecast)

Anne Hathaway looked really pretty at the Venice Film Fest. (Popoholic)

I would totally eat this stuff from Starbucks, because I like little food items neatly packaged together for my snacking pleasure. (Serious Eats)

What’s the difference between geeks, nerds and dorks? Well, I can’t say off the the top of my head without a Pajiba Readership Pie Chart. (mental floss)

Because I am fascinated both by proms and the midwest, today’s Pajiba Love Friday Feature is The World’s Best Prom. Enjoy!

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.







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Comments

I cry because I thought it was ranch dressing but it was really horseradish.

NOW WHAT WILL I DIP MY ONION RINGS IN?!?!

Posted by: Mella at September 5, 2008 12:03 PM

Oh yeah, it's Sarah Palin's fertility that frightens me most about her. That must be it.

Eat a dick, religious right.

Posted by: Kolby at September 5, 2008 12:10 PM

That "Why Women Cry" glurge made me cry. From rage. Litelysalted's got a mean streak.

Posted by: Jerce at September 5, 2008 12:13 PM

Except that the "respected Pajiban" got it all wrong about why liberals don't like Palin. I and my liberal friends with whom I have discussed this issue really don't care about her fertility, her teenage daughter's sex life or her intimacy with AK-47s. We dislike (not "hate", hate is a Republican value) Palin because of her positions on key issues:
1) As a woman she has aligned herself with a candidate who does not believe in equal pay for women
2) As Governor of one of the most beautiful states in the Union, she is hellbent on destroying it in pursuit of short-term gain and maintaining the status quo reliance on fossil fuel.
3) As a Christian, she picks and chooses where to apply her Christian values: anti-choice but pro-the death penalty and in fact pro expansion of the death penalty to other crimes (also anti-homosexual rights, sex ed, etc.). It would be fine if this were her own private position. She's entitled to pervert religion as much as the next person, but she is not entitled to impose it on the nation: that's re-writing the Constitution and that's illegal.
4) As a mother of a Down Syndrome child, she has allied herself with a prospective president (and an entire party) that has consistently opposed expanded child health care, mental health care, and support for adults with mental health problems. Remember, Reagan was the one of decided schizophrenics didn't need that much help and turfed them out of care homes to increase the nation's homeless population considerably. Yes, she put some money toward mental health care in Alaska, but it was a token amount and less than it cost to fund a row of seats in the giant hockey stadium she built in her tiny town (that is still being paid for because she screwed up the budgeting).
Shall I go on????

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 12:25 PM

"...a sanctified, self-satisfied presumptuousness that flows from sheer naïveté about oneself and the world and manifests itself in giddy ambition...."

Truer words have never been written. It's amazing to me How we've managed to go from *power* (intellectual/industrial/diplomatic) that helped defeat totalitarianism and helped rebuild Europe/Japan to the geopolitical equivalent of that Kevin Kline character from "A Fish Called Wanda"

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 5, 2008 12:28 PM

The fact that this Down's baby was carried to term and not aborted is statement that his life has the same value as all life. This is an idea with which the left vehemently disagrees.

I cry because apparently, people on the right actually think things like this.

Also, because S-Palin's children's names are so, so stupid. Track? Trig? Really?

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 5, 2008 12:36 PM

BarbadoSlim, you are a class act for invoking the name of Otto, he who is not stupid. Always a joy to see him tearing about town in his car, yelling "ASSHOOOLLLLE!" when cutting someone off.

Posted by: Mike R. at September 5, 2008 12:38 PM

I'm fine with "the family is off limits". However, if you stick to that, you can't list "good mother" as one of Palin's qualifications for the nomination. Everyone keeps saying she's a good mother, but apparently you're not allowed to question that assertion. Besides, being a good mother is probably not correlated to being a good president.


I just feel so bad for poor Bristol. I really really hope she and that boy want to get married, and that they're not being pressured into it because of either the nomination or because of "family values".

Anna, the column had a link to some idiot who actually said if she were in Sarah Palin's place, she would have aborted the fetus with Down Syndrome. People like her should be shot in the face.

Posted by: Three-nineteen at September 5, 2008 12:42 PM

"Instead of being viewed as just another baby, Trig is seen by the left as a little Terri Schiavo"

No, we leave that role to McCain.

This woman is a moron, as are her followers. I know I'm supposed to find her sassy and refreshing, but I don't and even if I did, I wouldn't want them in a VP during a crucial four years in U.S. history.

Posted by: samantha t at September 5, 2008 12:45 PM

Samantha T: she's neither sassy nor refreshing she's just this awkward PTA creature trying to show everyone "she's 'with' it." All of it pre-packaged and aimed DIRECTLY at the bible belt demo.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 5, 2008 12:49 PM

People like her should be shot in the face.

And also, not held up as a person who represents the views of left-leaning persons. I saw that link, I opted not to follow it. 'Cause I'd probably shoot her in the face.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 5, 2008 12:50 PM

I come froma family of 10 that believes do what you want with your life but leave me to lead mine. The "left" and hopefully any intelligent voters, view the nomination of Palin with trepidation because she has no experience and is far right evangelical and thus stuck in the 1920's in terms of social reforms.

I am sick of the GOP saying that Palin's family should not be the issue. She pushes for Abstinence Only education yet has failed in her own household to get the point across. In that respect her daughter's pregancy out of wedlock and in high school is a big goddamn issue.

How many people are running around aborting down syndrome babies? Is this an epidemic I have been unaware of. I'm pro-choice for one very simple reason: I can't get pregnant and I'll be damned if I'm going to tell someone else what to do wtih their body.

All you pro-Palin folks ask yourself this, would she be on that stage if she was running for President? No. The GOP never in a million years would put an untested rookie in the national arena. But tacking her on to the campaign of a 72 year old somehow negates that very basic logic?

There is no way I want the self professed "hockey mom" Palin as President of the US, so we should probably hold off on putting her 1 step away from the most powerful seat in the world.

I'll take Obama's vague declarations of change if it means the Evangelicals get to stay out in the cold with their puritanical bullshit a bit longer.

Posted by: TylerDFC at September 5, 2008 12:56 PM

I just wanted to say, that despite the growing, festering violent rage that threatens to explode out of my brain in a napalm-hot righteous fury after watching the RNC...

...

Sometimes, I love you guys. This is one of those times.

Posted by: TK at September 5, 2008 1:02 PM

Sometimes we love you too, TK.

Come on - let's have a giant pro-choice, gay-loving, rational-thinking, group hug. With fondling.

Posted by: Kolby at September 5, 2008 1:08 PM

Hear, hear!

Fury. White hot rage. I don't think my liver can handle the amount of numbing I'm going to need over the next two months.

Posted by: elizabeth at September 5, 2008 1:09 PM

"The "left" and hopefully any intelligent voters, view the nomination of Palin with trepidation because she has no experience and is far right evangelical and thus stuck in the 1920's in terms of social reforms."

That's interesting...cause the main reason the right dislikes obama is that "[s]he has no experience and is a far [left] socialist and thus stuck in the 1920's in terms of [marxist/socialist] reforms."

funny how things work...

Posted by: Some Guy at September 5, 2008 1:13 PM

Barbado Slim: Well-put. It's all disguised as "plain-talkin'" for the simple folk. So enraging and I can't fucking BELIEVE people are falling for it all over again.

I also wanted to slap the shit out of Giuliani for going after Obama with his "I'm sorry if Obama thinks [Palin's] hometown isn't cosmopolitan enough." Newsflash, Rudy: the demographic you're trying to appeal to DETESTS the city you were mayor of, so don't even try to ingratiate yourself to them. It's embarrassing.

Posted by: samantha t at September 5, 2008 1:17 PM

"All you pro-Palin folks ask yourself this, would she be on that stage if she was running for President? No. The GOP never in a million years would put an untested rookie in the national arena. But tacking her on to the campaign of a 72 year old somehow negates that very basic logic?"

Interesting idea as well...However, the same can still be applied to the other side. People aren't lying when they say that Obama is the single least experienced PRESIDENTIAL candidate in modern american history.

Explain the logic of how you fear the mere "possibility" of Palin making it into office, pending of course McCain goes and dies during his term, which is pretty unlikely, when you are supporting a man with sliiiightly more experience for the office of president without someone having to die in the process.

And what if Obama dies? African American men statistically live far shorter lives than others, so it is a relevant a fact as McCains age. Do you really want Joe Biden to be president???

Posted by: Some Guy at September 5, 2008 1:17 PM

RE Posted by: Three-nineteen at September 5, 2008 12:42 PM
I just feel so bad for poor Bristol. I really really hope she and that boy want to get married, and that they're not being pressured into it because of either the nomination or because of "family values". Anna, the column had a link to some idiot who actually said if she were in Sarah Palin's place, she would have aborted the fetus with Down Syndrome. People like her should be shot in the face.


Hilarious!

Just to be clear, shot in the face with a handgun or a shotgun? They both have compelling advantages.

Posted by: LL at September 5, 2008 1:18 PM

Unfuckingbelievable. Oh yeah, all us liberals get rid of our imperfect children. We kill 'em early; the pro-lifers wait until they can send them off to an oil war.
McCain is so confident in Palin's "qualifications" that he's banning her from talking to the press. He says we're going to learn enough about her from campaign ads and speeches.

Posted by: Cindy at September 5, 2008 1:23 PM

Sarah Palin scares the living shit out of me more than almost any other public figure - almost more than W. If you haven't seen it yet, this letter from someone who has known Palin since '92 is as enlightening as it is frightening.

Posted by: ella at September 5, 2008 1:24 PM

shot in the face with a handgun or a shotgun?

Why limit ourselves? We could start with a .22 and work our way up.

Posted by: Three-nineteen at September 5, 2008 1:29 PM

"Do you really want Joe Biden to be president???"

I'd actually be fine with Biden for President and would prefer not to see him put in the same category as the likes of Palin in print ever again. Biden is far, far more accomplished than Palin. He will, undoubtedly, destroy her in debates, but I'm sure the GOP and its flunkies will manage to spin that, too.

Posted by: samantha t at September 5, 2008 1:33 PM

Also, because S-Palin's children's names are so, so stupid. Track? Trig? Really?

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 5, 2008 12:36 PM

They are all references to town or place names in Alaska (with the exception of Piper, who is supposedly named after the Piper Cub airplane which is a staple of Alaskan transport).

Posted by: Che Grovera at September 5, 2008 1:38 PM

cause I generally refrain from all discussion politcal (that is how you learn to be when your family is split down the middle politically and you don't like heated debates that lead nowhere)...

So, yesterday I started to cry in the middle of the huge university library because I couldn't get my wifi working and I forgot my (absurd and completely un-memorable, but "safe") school account password so I couldn't print off my first paper for grad school. Way embarassing! But I did not cry earlier this week when I realized halfway to campus and too late to go home and change before class that I was wearing one black flip flop and one brown flip flop. Then I laughed.

Posted by: ami at September 5, 2008 1:39 PM

Just to pile on:
She is a lifelong Christian who belongs to an evangelical church. No further explanations should be needed about the provocations which emanate there from.
Sweet freaking Jesus! The woman believes the earth is 6000 fucking years old. I may not believe in this whole God thing, but, still, that's insulting to every Christian in America who isn't a creationist idiot (i.e., MOST Christians in America)

Posted by: megbon at September 5, 2008 1:41 PM

The difference being, if Obama becomes president, it will be because a majority of the population chose him to be. If Palin becomes president, it is because a series of unfortunate events ensued:

1. McCain meets Palin once and likes her tits.

2. McCain gets elected.

3. McCain kicks.

Posted by: slower lower at September 5, 2008 1:42 PM

Some Guy:

It's not the possibility of her becoming president that is frightening. It's the fact that the Vice-President's office over the past 8 years has been illegally transformed into very arguably the most powerful office in the country, always invoking "executive privelege" to avoid any accountability to the legislative branch and holding key policy meetings that have a major impact on the country and often on the world in complete and again, I stress, illegal secrecy. In her worship of Bush/Cheney we have every confidence she will continue the trend.

And exactly how does Obama have less experience? He was a state Senator for a large mid-western state that encompasses a major metropolitan area as well as heartland farms, blue collar industry and the gamut of working class rural white neighborhoods and inner city ethnic neighborhoods before becoming a federal Senator. In fact, he currently represents a state that is overall far more representative of all of the US than any corner of Alaska. Here's a novel thought: next time you post, instead of parrotting RNC spin, give some facts that are rooted in reality. Or would that just expose your candidate for the sham she really is?

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 1:43 PM

Do you really want Joe Biden to be president???

Posted by: Some Guy at September 5, 2008 1:17 PM

As opposed to John McCain or Sarah Palin? Oh, hell yes! I hate to think about the right-wing nutjobs who are more than likely dusting off their sniper scopes even as we speak. God forbid that something nefarious happens to President Obama, but President Biden sounds a HELL of a lot more appealing than any ordinary nutsack (or vagooter) the Republicans could prop up in the Oval Office.

Posted by: Che Grovera at September 5, 2008 1:47 PM

Biden is far, far more accomplished than Palin.

As is Obama. Republicans can trot out this nonsense argument about Palin being "the same" as Obama, and it's just a fucking obvious lie. Do not allow this falsehood to go unchallenged.

Before we even get to Obama's state level experience, he's been in the Senate twice as long as Palin was governor of Alaska. When Obama was opposing the war in Iraq and dealing with federal budget and foreign policy issues in the upper house of our legislature, Palin was still figuring out how much to charge for the one parking meter in her podunk town.

Obama's U.S. Senate service followed eight years in the state senate of Illinois, which ain't exactly the grand stage, but it's a helluva lot more impressive than being the mayor of Mayberry. When someone suggests that Palin's experience is remotely comparable to Obama's the correct response is to laugh in their face. They're already so deluded that no argument is going to work.

The biggest issue isn't experience, however, it's philosophy. If you're an ethnic minority, a woman, a homosexual, or anyone making less than a few hundred thousand dollars a year, McCain and Palin do not give two shits about you except to the extent you can carry a rifle in the Middle East -- ethnic minorities only, please, fags need not apply. It's a simple fact.

I never thought the choice could get more absurd than it was in 2004. I was wrong.

Posted by: socalledonlycousins at September 5, 2008 1:51 PM

Bravo, PaddyDog. The media circus around Palin disregarded the issues in favor of the tabloid sludge. More reasons to hate Palin:

Lifelong member of the NRA. We need more gun nuts in high places?

Ok with banning books from libraries

Her voice would peel paint.

Posted by: Cris at September 5, 2008 2:01 PM

I love this place.

I've been everywhere with the Obama campaign these past couple of years and with all the hooplah that's been going on these past few months I'm standing closer to them than ever.

I'm just glad that it's not just my friends and I that have these feelings. But we're not nearly as well spoken as you folk.

Posted by: Kash at September 5, 2008 2:06 PM

So being a state senator is good for experience, eh?

I have doubts to that, since apparently you just have to vote "present," to be considered a good senator....

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/12/20/us/politics/20obama.html

Posted by: Some Guy at September 5, 2008 2:06 PM

Also, because S-Palin's children's names are so, so stupid. Track? Trig? Really?

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 5, 2008 12:36 PM

They are all references to town or place names in Alaska (with the exception of Piper, who is supposedly named after the Piper Cub airplane which is a staple of Alaskan transport).

Posted by: Che Grovera at September 5, 2008 1:38 PM

Great, way to make me feel bad for saying that, Che. Although, honestly, if I had kids I don't think I'd name them Newark and Camden or Pine Barrens or some shit just because I live in NJ. *sigh* Fine, fine. I won't make fun of her kids' names any more.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 5, 2008 2:09 PM

And when I say "these feelings," it has nothing to do with Obama. I meant it in a way that reflected the anti-McCain/Palin/the like mindset.

Posted by: Kash at September 5, 2008 2:09 PM

Nice try, Some Guy, but you demonstrate a lack of understanding of both the Ill state senate and the issue. It's more complicated than that.

http://www.stateline.org/live/details/story?contentId=274863

Posted by: TK at September 5, 2008 2:09 PM

Synopsis Steve Addington, long-boarding, herb-totting, soul-surfer, returns to Malibu for the summer to find his hometown vibe corrupted. New sponsorship demands the surfer expand into Virtual-Reality Video Games and Reality TV. Unwilling to participate in this new digital-reality, Addington chooses to stay earthen and analog, surfing majestic So-Cal waves. But in a biblical twist-of-fate, the waves go flat and stay flat. Out of money, his sponsored expense-accounts canceled, betrayed by his buddies, the waveless Addington is backed into a harsh corner. He must endure the insanity of the wave drought or give into the Man and his reality-altering machines and pre-packaged amusements. Aided and abetted by his manager (Woody Harrelson), his mentor (Scott Glenn), his guardian-angel (Willie Nelson) and his summer lover, (Alexie Gilmore), Addington (Matthew McConaughey) has a high-quality chance of keeping his cool, maintaining his mellow and bringing harmony to his fractured and waveless world. It won't be easy.

All's I know is whoever get elected better show this gem on the White House lawn, baby! HELL YEAH! GIMME MORE MCCONODOUCHE! WHOOOOOO!

Posted by: Skittimus Maximus at September 5, 2008 2:09 PM

President Biden sounds a HELL of a lot more appealing than any ordinary nutsack (or vagooter) the Republicans could prop up in the Oval Office.

Posted by: Che Grovera

I can't think of anyone who would defeat a Nutsack/Vagooter '08 ticket.

Posted by: Mella at September 5, 2008 2:14 PM

So being a state senator is good for experience, eh?

Well, here's my exact quote, in case you missed it or intentionally chose to mischaracterize it: "eight years in the state senate of Illinois, which ain't exactly the grand stage, but it's a helluva lot more impressive than being the mayor of Mayberry."

What's comical about this debate is how the right wing has to attack Obama as if his supporters are offering him up as the next FDR. The reality: Nearly everyone I know who supports Obama doesn't think he's some messiah, and most of them have legitimate concerns about his seasoning, though he seems very genuine and sincere.

The issue, as usual, is not whether he's the best possible candidate ever; the issue is whether he's better than the fool and the tool being offered by the other side. The answer to that question is a resounding "how the fuck could he possibly be worse?"

Posted by: socalledonlycousins at September 5, 2008 2:16 PM

I won't make fun of her kids' names any more.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 5, 2008 2:09 PM

Oh goodness no, Anna von B. Please don't stop on my account. I thought the facts alone were so ridiculous that they didn't need any embellishment -- they are inherently ridicule-worthy. Thus, I won't ask about how your deadbeat son Hoboken is doing...

Posted by: Che Grovera at September 5, 2008 2:17 PM

This is interesting...

There were more murders in Chicago this summer than american troops killed in iraq over the same period,,,

Chicago...Chicago...

What state is that in, again?

Man, if I were from Chicago I would be really pissed at whomever is representing me in gov't...

http://cbs2chicago.com/local/chicago.summer.shootings.2.810166.html

Posted by: Some Guy at September 5, 2008 2:22 PM

Come on - let's have a giant pro-choice, gay-loving, rational-thinking, group hug. With fondling.

And tweaking, and caressing, maybe the odd squeeze or grope...with civil discourse and respect for all! (Ok, maybe those last two were a little optimistic). The best thing about Palin is that each time her and her sexy librarian glasses show up on screen I hear a very rhythmic soundtrack in my mind, and I smile just a little before moving on.

Posted by: lordhelmet at September 5, 2008 2:25 PM

Some Guy:

Don't want you to think I'm ducking you, I got unexpectedly busy.

However, Obama vs Palin is a huge difference and for me it comes down totally to idealogy. Is Obama the best choice for president? In this lot, yes. I'm not happy with either choice, I'm less un-happy with Obama.

I'm pro-choice, pro-gay marriage, pro-evolution, pro-sex education in schools promoting safe sex, pro-Iraq withdrawl, pro-stop fucking the middle class up the ass, pro alternative energy, pro get the goddamn Bible out of politics.

However, I'm in the same lovely "Red State" as DammitJanet so the chances of my vote actually mattering in the coming election is slim to none. Based on the ejaculations of joy most of my co-workers are expelling over Palin I doubt idealogy is even going to be a factor here.

So yeah, the choice is easy for me.

Posted by: TylerDFC at September 5, 2008 2:25 PM

I could give a rip if you're Republican or Democrat. But holy friggin' guacamole folks - we can't tear Palin apart over dippity doo shit like her knocked-up daughter, or that she likes to shoot stuff or all that other inane poop. Fact is, she's done a great job of taking the spotlight off of McCain - which seems like a great plan of attack for him. He can just sit in the background while ignorant media coverage shows hooting crowds of "Hoosiers for The Hottie" and people talking about her Downs Syndrome baby, decades-old DUI and other ridiculous shit. Take away her kids, take away her good looks and charisma, take away the fact that she's a woman and what are we left with? Someone very inexperienced who more than likely will be forced into a position they aren't equipped to handle. Is Obama gonna be the greatest? Hell no. But when talking about an elected duo, the Democrats have more experience than a gut-reaction veteran and his spunky sidekick.

It's not about which party wins, it's about who can do better for the goddamed country. I'm tired of all the media-ready quips and dumb-ass promises. Discussing, in-depth, what your plans are to make the country a better place far outweigh nifty barbs and empty promises. I could stand at a goddamed podium and say shit like "We're gonna make a change in the American economy!" and "We guarantee every man, woman and child gets the healthcare thay deserve!"... Tell us exactly how you're gonna accomplish the shit do it and spend less time being a dick to the other party...

P.S. Conrad is a dick. Thank you.

Posted by: Skittimus Maximus at September 5, 2008 2:26 PM

Em, have you checked out McCain's voting record, to be specific the number of votes he has missed even in this past year?

And by the way, state Senator requires an in-depth understanding of funding, programming, addressing the very diverse needs of the state. It's a very hands-on local job; AND look up howing voting in the Illinois House works before you attack YET AGAIN with vague and unfounded accusations.

And you know what, I'm not even going to bother anymore because you have nothing. You haven't bothered to bring up anything relevant or issue-based. Go ahead and wallow in your ignorance if that makes you happy. You can't help those who don't want to be helped.

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 2:28 PM

This is why it's so frustrating being a Canadian living in the states. I have absolutely no way to influence the outcome of this election, and I'm sorry but on all but my most optimistic of days I do not trust the American people at large to think their way out of a paper bag!(note: I feel the same way about humanity as a whole. Individual people can be lovely, human kind scares the everliving fuck out of me.)

I heard a woman actually call in to a news show and say, "Well, I'm not voting for Obama because of that whole Saddam thing."

... WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?

Posted by: darwinfox at September 5, 2008 2:31 PM

OH MY GOD!

This election has finally delivered what I never thought was possible.
A serious post from Skittimus!!!

There must be a new drinking game rule for this. I suggest a jeroboam of Veuve Cliquot (coz, I'm one of those Obama-loving elitists) should be consumed immediately by all. This is a rare occurrence Pajibans. Skittimus has spoken rationally and from the heart and it's not a bout sex, murder or munchies. A moment of reverential silence please.

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 2:32 PM

*sob*

How can you even ask me about him, Che? you know how much heartbreak that kid has caused me...

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 5, 2008 2:34 PM

Some Guy... that's pretty apples and oranges, buddy. Incidentally, Chicago is ranked 20th per capita in murder rates among US cities. Which, given its size, is pretty damn good. Nice try.

Posted by: TK at September 5, 2008 2:35 PM

It's not about which party wins, it's about who can do better for the goddamed country. -Skittimus Maxi-hot-us

Have I told you lately... that I love you?

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 5, 2008 2:35 PM

There were more murders in Chicago this summer than american troops killed in iraq over the same period

You cannot be serious. You just can't possibly be serious with that argument. Except that you're defending McCain/Palin, so that kind of utter lack of a rational or logical position is typical of the strained nonsense that has to be trotted out in lieu of a legitimate argument.

I missed the part of Obama's resume where he was the mayor, police chief, and city council of Chicago, all rolled into one. Or the part where one state senator was somehow in charge of reducing the murder rate of a large metro area in his state.

Oh! Except that's the biggest hole in your argument, if you in fact had an argument instead of a Bill O'Reilly/Sean Hannity distract-the-morons non-sequitur. Those numbers are from 2008, and of course Obama is now a federal senator. Typically federal senators don't have direct involvement in local police matters.

They do get involved, however, where a group of war criminals uses deception to send thousands of young adults to die for nothing. Opposing that shit Obama was involved in, since that's actually his job.

Posted by: socalledonlycousins at September 5, 2008 2:36 PM

Murders in Chicago!! I'll bet they were all committed by asphixiation with a pillow case. There's no way they were committed with the powerful guns that Mrs. Palin thinks are so essentially American it's important that they be available to every thug at all times.

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 2:41 PM

Oh, I was just kidding - I'M NOT EVEN GOING TO VOTE! YAY, NADER! WHOO!

So anyhow, I says to Gene, I says "Yeah, I was super aroused after running over that guy with the lawnmower, but I just had to get some Funyuns first"...

Posted by: Skittimus Maximus at September 5, 2008 2:41 PM

I am an evangelical Christian, I believe in the bible, Jesus Christ the whole 9 yards - I am also a card carrying member of the Democratic Party and never, never, NEVER would I, in a million freaking years vote for the likes of John McCain and Sarah Palin. I am so damn sick and tired of ignorant, arrogant, and presumptuous conservative politicians completely whoring out the gospel of Christ for their own benefit. Practically everything on the conservative agenda runs so contrary to the faith they claim to ascribe to. And it totally infuriates me that so many other Christians, who I believe at some level are basically decent, sincere people, eat that shit up with a spoon. I was so insanely disgusted watching her speech the other night, I can't even fricken' describe it. Dear God, open your eyes people!!!!!!

Posted by: megan at September 5, 2008 2:41 PM

Carrying this absurd theory out to its logical conclusion, I'm sure we'll be treated to the glitteringly low murder rate of Buttfuck, Alaska during Palin's tenure as mayor. Somehow, with all 9,000 residents locked inside their houses for half the year while it's 20-below outside, I'm confident that she gets credit for low, low crime! Let's make her VP!

Posted by: socalledonlycousins at September 5, 2008 2:42 PM

Aw come on Skittimus! I'm only two glasses in and I really want an excuse to finish this bottle before the McCain/Palin presidency outlaws all sophisticated alcohol and condemns us to a life of Coors and moonshine.

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 2:44 PM

Murders in Chicago!! I'll bet they were all committed by asphixiation with a pillow case. There's no way they were committed with the powerful guns that Mrs. Palin thinks are so essentially American it's important that they be available to every thug at all times.

Careful, Paddy -- you're using that thar logicky thing-ama-hickey again. Some Guy's comeback will surely be that Obama was in Washington, DC a lot over the past four years, and Washington DC has a really high murder rate. So Obama is responsible for that as well. The federal Congress is responsible for DC, so it's his fault!

Also, the Chicago Bears went into camp this year with two woefully bad quarterbacks. Goddamn you Obama, you'd be a terrible president!

Posted by: socalledonlycousins at September 5, 2008 2:45 PM

Palin's kids are Track, Trig, Willow, Piper and Bristol. I have the right to throw stones at her simply because of this fact.

The Down's Syndrome debate is around because supposedly when couple's go to get the last amniotic/sonogram picture test thingie before the birth, when it's found out that it's a Down's child more than 50% choose to have an abortion. I'm pro-choice and I remember pro-lifers spouting this fact before anyone knew who Palin was.

The second I read Palin tried to ban books I hated her. Don't you EVER tell me what I can and cannot read!

Skittimus if you're not single then lead me to your twin brother. Immediately.

Posted by: scorzi at September 5, 2008 2:48 PM

Sarah Palin's a gun toting, bear and wolf killing, oil drilling, pro-life, fanatical Christian cunt. That's why I hate her.

Posted by: Trig Palin at September 5, 2008 2:50 PM

Socalled:

Yeah, you're right. Also the Cubs' home Wrigley Field is up for sale and you know Cubs are baby Bears which means Obama is permitting the sale of a bear's womb which is exactly the same as abortion. I have been so wrong and misguided all these months.

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 2:51 PM

Some Guy,

It's a senator's duty to prevent murder? That's new. I was under the impression that it was to vote to enact or prevent laws (depending on your conscience and the needs of your constituents). Nice try on the diversion, but you haven't answered back as to whether you understand how the "present" vote works (hint: it's equivalent to a "no" vote and is strategically by both parties to kill or stall unfavorable legislation).

Argument = FAIL. Obama shows an understanding of legislation & the ins and outs of senatorial procedure.

Now, can we talk about how Gov. Palin brought $27 million or so in earmarks to Podunk, Alaska during her mayoral tenure, or how she supported the Bridge to Nowhere before she was against it (and kept the money for Alaska after she killed the project), and is now running a tough reformer with the King of No Pork? The book-banning and Trooper-Gate are just side dishes to this delicious meal of fucknuttery.

Posted by: Tammy at September 5, 2008 2:54 PM

Megan:

Thank you for your comment. And sincere apologies for the ignorant comment from "Trig Palin" that casts aspersions on Christians in general. Most reasonable Pajibans understand that there are many Christians who feel the same way you do and that you are constantly bunched unfairly with the lunatic fringe because they yell so loudly and have a disprportionate influence on politics (why, I'll never know).

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 2:56 PM

p.s. Anybody else catch the tasty, tasty schadenfreude when the Party of National Security couldn't keep Code Pink or Veterans Against the War from interrupting their big event.

Yummy!

Posted by: Tammy at September 5, 2008 2:56 PM

Paddy:

Also, hot dog vendors in Chicago AND Champaign stopped offering two kinds of relish and now only offer one. Instead of dealing with this pressing national issue, Obama was a thousand miles away voting against 18-year-old kids' getting their torsos blown in half because our Dept. of Defense didn't have body armor for them.

In sharp contrast, Mayor Sarah Palin of Whazzitnow, Alaska met with the hot dog vendor -- there's only one there -- and convinced him to offer three kinds of relish. After that crisis was handled, she moved on to the question of re-zoning the town's intersection to finally get that traffic light they've been needing. Now THAT'S the kind of hands-on experience we need in the White House.

Posted by: socalledonlycousins at September 5, 2008 2:58 PM

I cry because PaddyDog is drinking Veuve Cliquot, which is the greatest, bestest, tastiest champagne in all the land.

Posted by: Three-nineteen at September 5, 2008 3:02 PM

Skittimus has spoken rationally and from the heart and it's not a bout sex, murder or munchies. A moment of reverential silence please.

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 2:32 PM

No, an event of this rarity and magnitude is a sign of far greater things afoot. If 6-6-6 is the mark of the beast, then 9-5-8 (08) must be...the mark of the Skitt. The Apocalypse is indeed nigh.

Posted by: Che Grovera at September 5, 2008 3:04 PM

I don't care about the politics because my bleeding ulcer does not allow me to enjoy opinions any more but I don't care if you are referring to Palin, Hilary, Michelle or McCain's trophy wife...CAN WE PLEASE LEAVE THE CUNT WORD UNSPOKEN?

Posted by: lateformyfuneral at September 5, 2008 3:05 PM

"mark of the Skitt" sounds like something you wash out of your underpants...

Posted by: Tammy at September 5, 2008 3:05 PM

Three-Nineteen:

About 6 months ago, I walked past a little wine shop in Chicago advertising Veuve (yellow label) at $28 a bottle. As a fan of the brand, I'm sure you know it usually retails at $40-$50 because of the weakness of the dollar. I bought a case. That's what credit cards are for.

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 3:07 PM

For the love of Godtopus, will someone please assure me that one day, people will stop thinking that the opposite of pro-life is pro-abortion? They want to give Palin a motherfucking medal for opting to carry a Down's baby to term a) like regular women of both parties don't do that every day and b) like the pro-choice liberals are gung ho to cleanse our population of imperfecton? We don't walk around shoving coat hangers into every vagina we see for fuck's sake, we simply don't want anyone telling us what we can do with our own personal vaginas.

The word itself makes some Republicans uncomfortable. Vagina. They don't like hearing it and find it difficult to say. Vagina.

Posted by: MG at September 5, 2008 3:11 PM

apparently you just have to vote "present," to be considered a good senator

This one actually at least relates to something about political actions, but it's an irrelevant non-sequitur nonetheless.

I'm going to break a big news story to everyone now: Sometimes legislators abstain from votes for strategic reasons to help their party or for some other political objective, like getting re-elected.

That rascal Obama did it! Damn him! Empty the Congress and legislatures of every scoundrel who does this! Wait, what's that echo in here? Where is everybody?

I'm glad McCain never voted in a way that would enhance his own political standing. Hells no. After the Chimp in Chief slandered McCain in the Republican primary in South Carolina eight years ago, Senator Maverick proceeded to vote with Chimpo 95% of the time over the next eight years. That's the political equivalent of sucking your enemy's dick, and McCain did that because he desperately, pathetically wants to be president so badly that he will betray his principles to be the nominee.

Wow, Some Guy, you convinced me. They're both politicians. I'm stunned, but it's hard to argue with the facts. Especially that "Mr.-Maverick-is-actually-Dubbya, Jr." fact.

Posted by: socalledonlycousins at September 5, 2008 3:15 PM

Sorry. Sometimes I forget that there are still some Christians who actually practice what they preach. I've heard of them before, but I always thought they were an urban legend.

Also, I just really wanted to say "cunt". It's been that kind of day.

But I still think Palin's a fucking nutjob and if, for some reason, McCain wins and dies while in office, she will make us wish the cowboy monkey was still in charge. Maybe. I haven't had much sleep this week, so I'm not even trying to make sense at this point.

Posted by: Trig Palin at September 5, 2008 3:17 PM

Trig Palin, you are forgiven simply for introducing me to the phrase "cowboy monkey" which made me laugh like a goon. And since I've spent the bulk of the day either a) writing employee performance evaluations, or b) seething in rage, I needed that.

Posted by: TK at September 5, 2008 3:21 PM

Look, no offense to anyone here, but I'm ready to vomit on myself with all the hate flying around these comments...where the hell are the fucking movie reviews??? This is the last shit I want to be reading to help myself destress before the weekend. Sheesh.

Posted by: Helcat at September 5, 2008 3:26 PM

Trig Palin:

Nicely done. It's not often in the anonymity of the blogosphere that a person has the balls to apologize properly. I agree she's a nutjob and I really didn't object to you calling her a cunt (after all Deadwood turned that word into nothing more than a standard unit of measurement). I did object to you pairing the "c" word with Christian.

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 3:28 PM

I need suggestions for a drink that is equal parts life-affirming and rage-ameliorating, as every moment of every day that I am subjected to yet another rendition of "I WAS A POW, DID YOU KNOW THAT? NOW YOU DO" and "MY KIDS MADE ME WHO I AM TODAY, HOW DARE YOU TALK ABOUT MY KIDS?!", I feel my blood pressure threatening to shoot out my eyeballs.

My first inclination is to drink tequila, straight from the bottle, alternated with shots of Frank's Red Hot, straight from the bottle (like Prairie Fire shots, but without the hassle of dirty shot glasses), but that will probably end up in me getting arrested for punching someone's dog.

Boozehounds, unite! What libation can wash the taste of partisan ass-licking and hypocrisy from my mouth???!

Posted by: Tammy at September 5, 2008 3:30 PM

Oi!!

People!

The Pajiba Overlords have given us a column for political shit. It is right there on the front page! Here is a link:
http://www.pajiba.com/sarah-palin-versus-barack-obama-tv-ratings.htm

TAKE IT THERE. (Thanks, PJ Overlords!)

This here is "Pajiba Love."

Following two separate columns of political hissyfitting is too goddamn confusing. Thank you for your cooperation.

Posted by: Jerce at September 5, 2008 3:31 PM

Trig Palin:

I agree with PaddyDog, nice of you to apologize. And I am offended by that word in any context, not just in this one....because if I had opinions, I would tend to agree with you about the other things you said. Carry on, carry on.

Posted by: lateformyfuneral at September 5, 2008 3:32 PM

There were more murders in Chicago this summer than american troops killed in iraq over the same period,,,

Man, if I were from Chicago I would be really pissed at whomever is representing me in gov't...

Ah yes, except as PRESIDENT, aka COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF OF THE ARMED FORCES, Bush has a lot more control and responsibility for those soldiers than a state senator has over regular law-breaking citizens.

Then again, Obama never tried to spy on suspicious people in an effort to "protect" them either, so maybe he really didn't do everything he could.

And what if Obama dies? African American men statistically live far shorter lives than others, so it is a relevant a fact as McCains age.

When I see Obama glomping down fried foods and sugar while sitting on his ass watching TV while sitting on a stoop in the ghetto and holding a gun up at a cop car, then I will be worried. Until then, I have a bit more belief that he will live a smidgen longer than McCain.

Unless any are aware of any plot to assassinate him, in which case, you might want to tell someone...

Posted by: Vermillion at September 5, 2008 3:32 PM

Jerce:
It broke out here because of the link to the "why liberals hate Sarah Palin" article. It's perfectly logical to comment on a link posted in Pajiba Love, no?

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 3:37 PM

are there any articles on how libertarians feel about Palin? Or Jehovah's Witnesses? or Social Democrats? Just wondering....

Posted by: lateformyfuneral at September 5, 2008 3:42 PM

I think Libertarians are okay with Jehovah's Witnesses. Not sure how they feel about Social Democrats.

But seriously, I can't imagine libertarians, whose entire philosophy is for the government to butt out, supporting a candidate who wants to ban books and monitor our wombs at all times. But then again, they do love their guns and the libertarian candidate this yeat was a huge supporter of the wire-tapping bill, so you know I'm not sure how that is reconciled with "butting out" since it seems to me to be the ultimate "butting in".

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 3:46 PM

Thanks TK for the article on "Present". mr.wsapnin and his McCain lovin' ass keeps throwing that in my face. fucker.

Here are two things I know for sure:

1)I plan to vote AFTER mr.wsapnin so I can cancel out his vote. Cuz I'll be pissed if he cancels out mine.

2) When (WHEN! people) Obama wins the election, he just better not fuck things up because it will be one miserable existance for lil ol' wsapnin, here.

How I married this man, I'll never know. I love him hard, but, shit y'all. I do believe that I was put on this earth to change him. I have already turned him from his former farmtown homophobia. But that took 10 years! The guy met Reagan. His motherfucking hero. That's what I'm dealing with. Godtopus help me!

Posted by: wsapnin at September 5, 2008 3:50 PM

Thank you for the grammar smackdown, PaddyDog, I deserved it...especially as I am a great bitcher about other's mistakes....

I would have thought the libertarians would shy away from her too, but I hear (not first hand yet)that several (most notably Boortz) have been speaking in her favor. As for the Social Democrats, they have to love this woman. And the Witnesses are beyond my ability to fathom, so I won't speculate.

Posted by: lateformyfuneral at September 5, 2008 3:51 PM

The word itself makes some Republicans uncomfortable. Vagina. They don't like hearing it and find it difficult to say. Vagina.

MG, this bit of cleverness can not go unnoticed and un-commented-upon. Way to work in the surreptitious Lebowski quote.

Posted by: thejodester at September 5, 2008 3:52 PM

Huh? Who said And what if Obama dies?

McCain's twice as old as Obama (could somebody double check my math? Any math majors or self-aware graphing calculators?). How is a guy in his 40's as close to death as a guy in his 70's who's had numerous bouts with face cancer?

Posted by: Trig Palin at September 5, 2008 3:52 PM

Lurking: Off

I'm not sure if anyone address this yet regarding Palin, but only a month ago on national TV she asked what does the VP do on a daily bases.

In an interview just a month ago, she dissed the job, saying it didn't seem "productive."

In fact, she said she didn't know what the vice president does.

Larry Kudlow of CNBC's "Kudlow & Co." asked her about the possibility of becoming McCain's ticket mate.

Palin replied: "As for that VP talk all the time, I'll tell you, I still can't answer that question until somebody answers for me what is it exactly that the VP does every day? I'm used to being very productive and working real hard in an administration. We want to make sure that that VP slot would be a fruitful type of position, especially for Alaskans and for the things that we're trying to accomplish up here for the rest of the U.S., before I can even start addressing that question."(From an Huffington Post article)

This concerns me, can't she Google it, look it up on Wikipedia, or read the Constitution, better yet if her childrens' education is half way decent she could ask one of them. Besides the fact that she is an elected official she should have some understanding of our civic process.

This then leads me to the following questions, how much does she really know about the US government? Has she at least seen Schoolhouse Rock? What does she know about foreign nations? Does she have any world history experience? Does she know the difference between a Sunni and Shi'a Muslim? What does she think about Communism? Would she be able to work with groups that have far different views/beliefs that her? If so, show me an example.

Then I get into the more national questions, like does she understand economics, can she balance her checkbook? If there are no abortions where will those children go, how will we (as a nation) take care of unwanted children, homeless, and support single mother/fathers barely making it? What does she think of the education system in the US? What could she do to make it even better?

Finally, if her family is important to her what will she do when she has to travel overseas to conference or to war torn nations? What if her job interferes with her being a part of her childrens' lives, will her children come first?

Damn it this is a job interview and so far I don't like the answers.

I just can't imagine Vice President Palin representing the US at anything other than a hunting party, or hockey match. It's bad enough that we've had President George W. Bush for the past 8.

But I have a contingency plan...If Obama isn't president, I'm moving to Canada or France.

Lurking: On

Posted by: Miss_Mimi at September 5, 2008 3:54 PM

Socalledonly cousins - Amen, Amen, Amen. The Rs should stay far, far away from any comparison of Obama to Palin.

Posted by: samantha t at September 5, 2008 3:55 PM

If I don't like the election results, I'm moving to Narnia or Middle Earth. Whereever you can still get good Tex-Mex.

Posted by: lateformyfuneral at September 5, 2008 3:56 PM

"I'm used to being very productive and working real hard in an administration."

Girlfriend, you are an ELECTED OFFICIAL. "Real hard" is grammatically incorrect and makes you sound semi-literate. I know pointing this out is unpopular and makes me Nancy No-Fun, but it's true.

I can't move past that to the profoundly disturbing fact that she doesn't know what the VP does and that she thinks she's too productive for the job.

Posted by: samantha t at September 5, 2008 3:59 PM

Lurking: Off
Sorry for the long post. I'm a disgruntled US voter and have been for the past 8 years.
Lurking: On

Posted by: Miss_Mimi at September 5, 2008 4:00 PM

Samantha t:

She wants to sound semi-literate. It worked for Bush. It plays well with the masses. Check out how Bush's accent changed over the years from estate in Connecticut Ivy leaguer to good old boy. Unfortunately, it works every time.

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 4:04 PM

Jerce: Rules? We don' need no stinkin' rules!

If Fool/Tool wins the election over Obama/Biden, I'm not going anywhere. I want a front-row seat for the next phase of the inevitable downfall of the empire. Everything else about our history has been accelerated to break-neck speed; the sacking by the Visigoths might as well be, too.

Or was it the Ostragoths?

Posted by: socalledonlycousins at September 5, 2008 4:07 PM

Am I the only one that thinks it's funny/scary that everybody's comparing Obama with Palin? Shouldn't we be comparing Obama with McCain, and Palin with Biden?

Posted by: Trig Palin at September 5, 2008 4:10 PM

She wants to sound semi-literate. It worked for Bush. It plays well with the masses. Check out how Bush's accent changed over the years from estate in Connecticut Ivy leaguer to good old boy. Unfortunately, it works every time.

Ugh, that disgusts me too, the villification of educated (or just plain intelligent) people, and the completely baffling idea that the leader of a global superpower should be a C student so they don't make the masses feel self-conscious about themselves.

Not that this is too surprising given that Ranylt can't use words with more than 3 syllables in her reviews without being called elitist or hoity-toity (they hyphenate that one so they don't get overwhelmed).

Posted by: MG at September 5, 2008 4:11 PM

Thanks Paddy Dog. And the apology was cool of you, Trig. The thing that sucks is that I think a lot of times, people equate Christianity with narrow-minded politicians like Sarah Palin or GWB or Pat Robertson, etc, when in actuality, the gospel that they proclaim is distorted, self-serving and fear-laden. It's also pretty ignorant and selective. There are plenty of Christians who don't check their brain at the church door. For some reason, the most ignorant seem to be the loudest. The modern malady in the political arena is one of a fundamental contradiction - there is an unblushing moralizing on politics and a shameless politicizing of morality. I for one sincerely hope that we get God out of politics - and soon. It dishonors Him and debases the rest of us.

Posted by: megan at September 5, 2008 4:11 PM

trig, trig, trig....

this is Political Science, dear, the Logic class is three doors down (if it hasn't been cancelled for lack of participation).

Posted by: lateformyfuneral at September 5, 2008 4:13 PM

Some Guy? Do your homework before you pipe up okay? If you actually researched such things you'd know that according to the FBI's uniform crime reports for 2006 (the last year data is fully available for) the homicide rate for Chicago is 6.1, way below Los Angeles' 12.4, D.C.'s 29.1, and 37.6 for New Orleans.

Posted by: clarity at September 5, 2008 4:18 PM

lateformyfuneral - I hear Middle Earth is good for it, but I'm not so sure lately since they've gone all corporate chain on everything.

Posted by: Alex at September 5, 2008 4:40 PM

PaddyDog,

Binnys had Veuve Cliquot on sale last month for around $30, too. My friends saw it, bought a case, and DIDN'T TELL ME. I'm considering not being friends with them anymore -- except , you know, they have a case of Veuve Cliquot.

Posted by: Three-nineteen at September 5, 2008 4:48 PM

Three-nineteen:

If you're anywhere near Chicago, I'm happy to share with a like-minded Pajiban. That's if you're not terrified to walk the streets of this murder-ridden madrassah city

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 5, 2008 4:57 PM

You guys are amazing! This is one of the best political discussions I've seen anywhere and the fact that it's on my favorite snarky movie and tv review site just makes me so happy. Thank you!

Now I have to address this: Miss_Mimi brought up a TON of good questions, but this is my *favorite* Has she at least seen Schoolhouse Rock? Love it! Thanks for the smile!

Posted by: Lainey at September 5, 2008 5:03 PM

It broke out here because of the link to the "why liberals hate Sarah Palin" article.

That's a sensible point, Paddy, but I still say that two columns brimming over with political noise is one too many.

And the scritti politti is completely dominating this here Love--there are barely any posts on any of the other items at all.

Save something back, folks. November's still a couple months away.

P.S. That Sarina is one funny bitch! She made me cry!

Posted by: Jerce at September 5, 2008 5:03 PM

PaddyDog,

I might be in Chicago tomorrow. Some friends are thinking about going to Flugtag:
http://www.redbullflugtagusa.com/Chicago2008

Posted by: Three-nineteen at September 5, 2008 5:20 PM

As a liberal, I can attest to the fact that I hate down syndrome babies more even more than I hate freedom.

Excuse me while I go sharpen my pitchfork and make sure those sinners get back to gnashing their teeth.

Posted by: Allison at September 5, 2008 6:10 PM

Soooooooooo, in CONCLUSION:

*Palin should remain in in her little corner of the Arctic Circle.
*McCain is probably gonna die in a spectacular, fury induced cardiac episode.
*Some Guy is Some kind of Douchebag.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 5, 2008 7:17 PM

"Am I the only one that thinks it's funny/scary that everybody's comparing Obama with Palin? Shouldn't we be comparing Obama with McCain, and Palin with Biden?"

Shhh...don't try and use logic, it just riles them up.

They need him to keep looking tough and smart, not like a junior senator with a spotty voting record and a full-time staff of 300 people who feed him, bathe him, and do his homework for him...

I can't wait for the debates. Hopefully they will do it in the impromptu townhall style, like Mr. "anytime, anywhere" agreed to...

And then reneged on the idea after he got his ass handed to him in the last town hall debate...

http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/politics/5921429.html

Without a teleprompter or speech writer Obama uses more "uh's" and "um's" than a 3rd grader trying to explain the history of the east india trading company.

Posted by: Some Guy at September 5, 2008 7:28 PM

Thanks Barbado, I love you, too.

Posted by: Some Guy at September 5, 2008 7:30 PM

Some Guy said "Thanks Barbado, I love you, too...."


No, thank YOU, that's what I'm all about love.

Love and unicorns..

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 5, 2008 7:36 PM

You know, I think I unconsciously quoted Douglas Adams there by accident, and well, just to be fair, here are some more analogies:

'Without a teleprompter or speech writer Obama uses more "uh's" and "um's" than..."

A 5 year old describing what he did for summer vacation...

Paris Hilton when asked as to why she is famous....

Joe Biden, when asked to verbally answer a question in 30 seconds or less....

Monica Lewinsky, when her dry-cleaner asked her "what's this white spot?"

And just to let you all have some fun too,

Sarah Palin, when asked to define the word "irony,"

And John McCain, when asked if he called his wife a cunt.

Just kidding on that last one, we all know McCain's response to that question was "you're damn right, that bitch deserved it."

Posted by: Some Guy at September 5, 2008 7:45 PM

Shhh...don't try and use logic, it just riles them up.

You know, jackass, as soon as I see the first morsel of logic from you, I'll let you know whether I'm riled. The idea that you possess that type of wherewithal, however, is pretty dubious.

On the off chance you really believe your own nonsense, there's a reason that the constitutional qualifications for POTUS and VP are identical. It's because any of the four nominees may have to serve as president. Therefore, it's completely legitimate -- and entirely necessary -- to compare each of them to the other three. Like the rest of your party, I know that you don't care about pesky constitutional provisions, but despite your best efforts, they've survived.

Beyond that point of high school civics, there's also the fact that your own candidate, McCain, has repeatedly attacked Obama based on the experience issue. Then he chooses Palin, revealing McCain to be a cynical hypocrite, so again, the comparison of Palin and Obama is relevant and necessary. With his voting record over the last four years, McCain's hypocrisy is not much of a surprise, but then you knew that.

Beyond that fundamental and easy calculus, however, is this: Comparing Palin to Obama is necessary because McCain is betraying his country by willfully ignoring the basic demographic data that show a decent chance he'll die in office, leaving us with the Burghermeister of Fairbanks as president.

I can't wait for the debates.

After seeing McCain, his empty, faltering talking points, and his creepy smile, I can't either.

Posted by: socalledonlycousins at September 5, 2008 7:47 PM

"uhs" and "ums" are not a mark of low intelligence in a speaker, it's just a noise people make while thinking. For that matter I've heard him speak without a prepared speech and I found him quite eloquent.

Poorly formed sentences, flubbing of well known sayings into a nearly unrecognizable, gooey mess of words, and making up words entirely, on a regular basis, are a few ways to tell if you're listening to a man who shouldn't be in charge of himself, let alone a nation.

Posted by: darwinfox at September 5, 2008 7:52 PM

Dude, I find it pretty humanizing that Palin has family issues.

What I don't like is that she's a hypocrite. And I don't mean the fact that, while she railed against government earmarks at the RNC she got her state $500 per capita in gov't earmarks as governor (10 times the national average) and $1000 per capita as mayor. And I'm not even referring to the fact (fact, not rhetoric) that when she campaigned for governor, she was a vocal supporter of the "bridge to nowhere" that she mocked in her speech. No, what makes the PR move that is Sarah Palin's VP nomination so fucking insulting is that the Republican Party has the gall to tout her as anti-politics-as-usual when, as would appear from the facts above, she's a typical politician. Except, you know, without experience in national government.

Frankly, I think dragging out all of her family issues and calling out the supposedly "liberal" media for focusing on her family when they should be focused on her ability as a politician is just a way to blind the public to her lack of any real foreign policy/national government experience.

Posted by: LB at September 5, 2008 8:06 PM

I'm thinking that it's about time we apply the same type of scrutiny to McCain that we did John Kerry, don't you? I don't know what the twisted mentality behind automatically giving a man who was, by many accounts a lousy military officer, who got shot down, the credibility to assume the reigns of a country.
In Roman times, guys who didn't come home in front of their troops were just laughed out of the forum.

Here are some interesting takes on that whole POW stint:

http://www.usvetdsp.com/mccainpic.htm

http://newswithviews.com/Devvy/kidd59.htm

Maybe it's about time someone took HIM to task like they did Kerry.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 5, 2008 8:08 PM

Am I the only one that thinks it's funny/scary that everybody's comparing Obama with Palin? Shouldn't we be comparing Obama with McCain, and Palin with Biden?

Posted by: Trig Palin at September 5, 2008 4:10 PM

Just reacting to the barbs that first emanated from the McCain camp; it's their subterfuge to distract from the fact that their side fares worst in direct Obama/McCain and Biden/Palin comparisons. McCain arguing for "change" is like a hooker arguing for abstinence; Palin isn't qualified to serve Biden coffee.

Also, the "Trig Palin" thing was marginally cute the first time you used it, but you've already worn it clean through.

Shhh...don't try and use logic, it just riles them up.

Posted by Some Guy at September 5, 2008 7:28 PM

I get riled up by any attempt to apply logic to faulty premises based upon innuendo and fabrication: garbage in, garbage out. If you don't get a response immediately should you somehow manage to apply logic successfully, it will be because we're stunned that you stopped being disingenuous -- then we'll be left to ponder why you've chosen to switch tactics midstream.

Posted by: Che Grovera at September 5, 2008 8:09 PM

Shhh...don't try and use logic, it just riles them up.

Logically, the oldest guy in the room will keel over first. Especially one with known health problems.

Logically, the side that bitches about experience being so necessary in their opponent wouldn't suddenly start whining how experience isn't so important with THEIR candidate.

Logically, the person trying to continue the failed policies of the previous administration shouldn't be blindly followed.

Logically, you would have realized your antics aren't changing a dang thing here, and would just move on.

Logic would be deficient on both sides, would you say?

Posted by: Vermillion at September 5, 2008 8:17 PM

And John McCain, when asked if he called his wife a cunt.

Just kidding on that last one, we all know McCain's response to that question was "you're damn right, that bitch deserved it."

Posted by: Some Guy at September 5, 2008 7:45 PM

Ugh. What a douchenozzle you are. And yes, I'm calling you names; civil discourse is clearly not your calling card. I can only assume that this is what you are trying to pass off as humor, but that's just stone-cold disgusting -- in the most part because it could actually be true from what I've seen with respect to McCain's alleged sense of humor.

Posted by: Che Grovera at September 5, 2008 8:20 PM

Hmmmmmm..
http://www.counterpunch.org/cockburn04192008.html

curiouser and curiouser

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 5, 2008 8:23 PM

I've said it before and I'll say it again, the McCain/Palin voting bloc should be renamed the "Barack Obama thinks he's better than me" bloc (see Guy: Some). And, dude, they're almost speaking the truth. Change the "thinks he" to "is" and you about sum it up. Fortunately, knuckle-dragging troglodytes no longer make up a majority in this country. Obama gets over 300 electoral votes. I'd bet the 3% of one house that I own he does...

Posted by: megbon at September 5, 2008 9:31 PM

Some Guy, I find it interesting that literally every single point you've made here has been soundly refuted. And yet, instead of either acknowledging that, or attempting some sort of response, you simply move on to the next uneducated, uninformed, unresearched bit of nonsense that pops into your thick goddamn head.

You're not riling people up because of your scintillating wit, you're not riling people up because of your unassailable logic, and you're sure as shit not riling anyone up because of your brilliant discourse.

If anything, you're riling people up because you're fucking stupid, yet refuse to quit despite that being glaringly obvious.

Posted by: TK at September 5, 2008 9:51 PM

Che, you've been around the Pajiba block before...You know damn well that civil discourse is not the calling card of this site.

Now patience TK, I'm still reeling from the previous lashing you gave me after I expressed my opinion on the Jeremy Wright affair. (BTW, whatever happened to that guy? Does Obama still go to that church? I seem to remember you guys defending wright with the same tenacity you defended obama for defending wright after Obama's great speech on race that someone felt the need to fawn over in the middle of a review for no reason whatsoever...)

Now ok, you expect me to respond to the dozens of comments that come my way personally? And you really think that everrrrry single one of my points is invalid and that you are always right?

take a deep breath and say it with me: riiiiiight.

You want a valid point against Obama? Here you go:

Obama has argued that we are in a recession. Obama is quoted saying we were in one a few months ago, and he continues to say we will be in one soon.

I would argue that in order to be in a recession, technically there must be two consecutive quarters of negative growth.

I would also argue that the US economy grew over 3 percent last quarter.

Therefore we are not in a recession, nor can we technically be in one until next Jan.

Obama would be wrong, I would be right. (I might also bring up the point that Obama has decided to raise taxes as part of his platform as pres., which is usually considered a bad way to bring about the end of any said recession...hmmm...interesting thought...)

You could and would, however, bring up opinion, and only that. You have no solid proof to show me that we are in fact in a recession. You can tell me about people losing their homes, which sucks, but some part of the blame must be laid at the feet of people who spend outside their means and buy a house that they can't afford. Same with people who don't get fixed rate mortgages.

Ultimately however, the US economy still grew last quarter over 3 percent. Even the price of a barrel of oil has dropped to around 110 dollars, down from 140? a few months ago?

You can talk about poverty and unemployment, but last time I checked those always exist, and I am fairly certain that eliminating either completely is a fairly impossible goal.

Not a single person has really "proved" much in here. You can't prove beyond a reasonable doubt that Bush is directly responsible for the rise in gas prices. You can offer examples of how he contributed, but what you provide is far from "beyond a reasonable doubt,"

You can't prove that it was his fault and his administrations fault alone that caused the mortgage crises. Some things he did contributed to it, some things CLinton did, some things senators did, some things corporations did. Bush was not the first guy to assume the mantle of POTUS.

You can't tell me you are correct in believing that Palin is "underqualified" to be VP, or even P, because there is no gold standard to judge what being completely qualified is (And I can't reasonably do so with Obama, either,) except for the one presented by the constitution.

If she reaches all of the qualifications laid out by such, then she is qualified to be VP and all other arguments become moot points. AKA, opinions.

All we are doing here is ruffling our feathers, trying to convert the unconvertable into changing their minds and our positions. THat is not going to happen because everyone has a different standard of what it takes to be commander-in-chimp, I mean, chief.

Facts can be manipulated to prove anything and you all know it. Sometimes the facts can be coming and going at the same time. One poll says this, another says that, one scientist says this, another says that. You're right because...there are more of you than there are of me??? Because I couldn't possible take the time to list every single argument presented against me? And that every single one of mine was throughly rebuked (in your opinion and by your opinion?)

I come on here and ruffle the feathers because you all take yourselves so. god. damn. seriously. Do I believe everything I post? Fuck no. Do you seriously believe that I think Obama is responsible for the crime in chicago? Fuck no.

Christ, if all the hyperbole in this discussion were shit, we'd ALL be swimming up to our ears in it right now.

Do I even really like McCain? Not really. I think all 4 candidates are twats, but I'll be damed if you're going to tell me that my opinion is "wrong" because yours is "right"

You team up on people who disagree with you, call them names, and then declare yourself the winner because you yelled the loudest and all of your friends agree with you. Nice work.

Posted by: Some Guy at September 5, 2008 11:58 PM

"Do I believe everything I post? Fuck no."

So, some of the time you talk just to be talking?
That's a stupid waste of time.
From now on when I read you, I will replace the words with blah blah blah blah blah.

Posted by: Loob at September 6, 2008 12:32 AM

Mostly it's sarcasm and a dislike of bullying.

Posted by: Some Guy at September 6, 2008 1:11 AM

Some Guy, bullying is when you are attacked unprovoked. You came to a room full of liberals who were basically just bitching and agreeing with each other and yelled fire. Then, when they yell back, you're being bullied?

Spare me the "oh poor me" routine. It doesn't work that way. You weren't bullied. You started barking about 12 posts in, and now, after getting your ass handed to you in a debate because you didn't do your research and didn't bother to look up your "facts" (which, yes, can be proven)
you're going to say we're picking on you? That you were just kidding?

Please.

Posted by: TK at September 6, 2008 1:38 AM

Some Guy. Please cease and desist with the idiocy. Every claim you have made is verifiably wrong and only serves to annoy the rest of us. As a wise one once said the truth is out there, just because you refuse to believe it doesn't make it any less so. Facts are facts.
P.S. I'd wager that Obama is smarter than you think and in fact much smarter than you. So you really shouldn't imply that he is unintelligent and has others do his homework for him. Where is your degree from Columbia? Your Harvard Law degree?

Posted by: clarity at September 6, 2008 1:43 AM

"...there is no gold standard to judge what being completely qualified is ... except for the one presented by the constitution.

If she reaches all of the qualifications laid out by such, then she is qualified to be VP and all other arguments become moot points."

I disagree. There's legally eligible, and then there's qualified, and there is a distinct difference between the two. Eligibility is factually inarguable. Well, mostly... McCain was born in the Panama Canal Zone, after all, but policies as arcane as the "natural born" stipulation are really just a letter of the law vs. spirit of the law kinda deal. Qualifications, however, most certainly can (and should) be debated.

Posted by: Sarina at September 6, 2008 2:08 AM

So to sum up all of Some Guy arguments:

1.We are all wrong

2.Everything is ok, the Union is strong and getting stronger.

3.Anyone can be "POTUS" 'cause really, it's no big deal.

Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 6, 2008 8:28 AM

* 's

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 6, 2008 8:29 AM

"...I come on here and ruffle the feathers because you all take yourselves so. god. damn. seriously..."

"...you yelled the loudest and all of your friends agree with you..."


----------------------------------------------

Dude, what site are YOU reading?

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 6, 2008 8:33 AM

As much as we Canadians (Yes...I speak for all of us sitting shivering in our igloos waiting for the next Timbit Moose Hunt) would love to be the promised land of liberal thought and policy it sadly is just not so any more. We're facing our very own election the month before your's...the 3rd in six years actually.

Apparently our Prime Robot believes the best way to stimulate the economy finally being dragged down into recession with our American cousins is to spend $4million on an election. Forget that he's introduced a bill that would deny funding to arts projects deemed 'offensive' while slashing funding to support the arts during a time of budget surplus, or tried to repeal same sex marriage or snubbed our largest trading partner (China) by not showing up to the Olympics. That's without me tossing in his Big Oil desire to be a Mini-Chimp but without the folksy charm and unintentional humour.

Seeing Sarah Palin gain the nod for VP only serves to depress me further. She makes me frightened that Alaska is so close to Canada where...there is both oil and fresh water to be found. What I find interesting about her son Trig is that within hours of having her special needs child she was back to work. Let alone that she hid the pregnancy for seven months-such a blessed event that should be trumpeted from the cover of People. After the fact the fact. I know from experience the sort of care Down's kids need and I certainly hope that the Palin's nanny does as well. The only reson I can see why her daughter's clearly unplanned pregnancy is that it is the best illustration of how 'Abstinence Only' education is a bunch of parental wishful thinking. I saw it non-stop in my rural town where they berated my mother for being the parent to try and educate about safer sex and hand out condoms. How she enjoys laughing about the fact she is the only one whose children didn't have babies in high school.

Now that I've babbled and ranted I think I need an early morning Gin and Tonic to chase away my sinking feeling that both of our countries are screwed.

Posted by: Ms. Parker at September 6, 2008 10:03 AM

How about a link to a bunch of Robert Downey Jr. pictures in Japan with a bunch of sake?

There's some regular ol' Pajiba Love for ya!

http://justjared.buzznet.com/2008/09/04/robert-downey-jr-hammer-haywire/

Posted by: Jay at September 6, 2008 10:07 AM

But Jay, the mustache distresses me ever so. Make it stop!

...I think it's moving. I swear I saw it crawling around on his face.

[shudder]

Posted by: Sarina at September 6, 2008 10:42 AM

(So late, damn) I can address why libertarians shouldn't vote for McCain/Palin with two social issues.
We're for gay marriage and pro-choice.
The former has no Constitutional basis for not being legal, and if the latter were removed the government could make decisions about any other organs in our bodies. Not to mention an abortion doesn't harm everybody on the fucking planet.

Jehovah's Witnesses are okay as long as they leave when you ask them to.
I'm not sure why a lot of libertarians are gun nuts, but it is probably related to how little government they want.
Barr pissed me off about that wiretapping bill.

I also expect the party to bring the lulz when they fight about the voting situation in Texas.

Posted by: Stew at September 6, 2008 5:49 PM

You guys're lucky Pajiba doesn't support images in posts, because I just found a cool image of Christopher Lee as The Mummy with the caption, "THIS THREAD WON'T DIE!"

Since it won't die: National Enquirer says Sarah Palin is a total hypocrite--she had an affair!

http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=NzRiNDZkODEwMzdkMThmOTQ1NjFjOGNlNTUzYzA1NmY=

They were right about Edwards. All I'm sayin'.

Posted by: Jerce at September 6, 2008 11:00 PM

No, thank YOU, that's what I'm all about love.

Love and unicorns.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim

Dude, all this time I thought you were cool. Turns out you're just Mariah Carey.

Posted by: Sofía at September 6, 2008 11:29 PM


















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