Pajiba

I don't know why the watermelon sign would be racist. Someone seemed generally upset that their beloved fruit had been stolen. As you would be. But watermelon was spelled incorrectly. I find that offensive.

What's embarrassing is your undying devotion to the Wunderkind candidate who, despite the Republicans best efforts over the past 8 years to "fuck things up" as you all so eloquently put it, can't break 50 percent in the polls or claim a margin over McCain greater than 4 or 5 points, even after the illustrious circle-jerk known as the DNC and the continuous propping up by the MSM.

What's even more embarrassing is the fact that we haven't even started the debates yet, when your candidate will actually have to show what he knows, and reveal what, exactly he plans to do with this country if he gets elected.

Hm. I'd have thought Mr. Spacey would be a more considerate ass-groper than that. Such an aggressive ass-groping would surely leave bruises, and I must say I'm disappointed.

Grope them gently, Kev, grope them gently.

Dear Some Guy,

I think you are lost. You want the Politico comment section.

You're welcome.

What's truly embarrassing, Some Guy, is a septuagenarian candidate who is so simultaneously arrogant and oblivious that he thinks he doesn't even need a credible running mate. What, he thinks he's gonna live forever? And please don't try to tell me that Mr. Straight Talk believes for one second that the mayor of Wasilla, Alaska is not only prepared to lead the country but also the best candidate he could find?

Re·pub·li·can (noun): see fucktard

What's embarrassing is your undying devotion to the Wunderkind candidate

WTF? After getting ass-raped by the Chimp in Chief and his thugs for eight years, I guess it's easy to get excited about someone who doesn't eat soup with a straw and scratch his ass every time he runs across a three-syllable word. McCain's tactics so far have alternated among "obvious pander," "misguided blunder," and "face-slap insult"; his campaign manager apparently is a fourth-grader who found the "How to Run a Kool Kampaign" guidebook on the internet.

So you despise Obama. How awesome for you. That doesn't upgrade McCain from Doddering Old Dumbass, and it doesn't make his running mate anything more than the chapter president of The Abstinence Society.

This is a hefty list, and for that I thank you. But seriously. First come all these little posts instead of the daily round-up, and now a Pajiba Love entry at NOON?

You are fucking up my universe, Pajiba!

And my RSS feeds in Thunderbird! The Pajiba pages take forever to load on my motherfucking Windows 2000 system! Why can't you be more aware of my needs, oh benevolent Pajiba-lords?

/end self-centered bitchfest

/sucks

In all of this so-called political discourse is no one else disturbed by Palin's obvious attempt to steal Tina Fey's look? Where is the anger? Where is the outrage?

You people disgust me.

Forget the daughter. It's a non-story. Let's talk about the fact that Palin was a card-carrying member of the Alaskan Secessionist party in the 1990s. Obama is un-American because he wouldn't wear the lapel pin but Palin is a true blue American despite the fact that 10 years ago she wanted to ditch US citizenship and secede? Why is there not more attention given to this?

Kushiro,

You mean this isn't Politico? I'm sorry, I got confused when I saw a picture of VP candidate Palin and her family on the main page, and even more confused when I clicked the link and read how I should be "embarrassed," by the McCain campaign.

...Still waiting patiently for someone to discredit McCain without referencing his age or George W. Bush in the same breath...

Wait, wait, wait,

Stop the presses,

I think I know why I should be embarrassed by the fact that Palin's 17 year old daughter is preggers.

It's because she didn't have a late-term abortion and hide it from her family and the public, right?

Some Guy:

How about this:
McCain helped to craft an immigration bill that would have provided a humane and reasoned way to treat human beings with dignity while addressing their crucial role in the US economy. Then he walked away from his own bill because the right wing bullies decided it was "un-American".
McCain opposes insurance companies covering birth control pills in their health care coverage.
McCain supports destroying the Alaskan nature preserve by drilling for oil.
McCain thinks it's perfectly fine to send young people to be killed and maimed in pursuit of a failed war agenda in Iraq.
McCain thinks women are such women are such sponge-brained idiots that they will vote for anything with a vagina.
Need I go on?

Sean, good points. I counter with:

Obama thought that we should have more Arabic translators in Afghanistan, despite the fact that they don't speak Arabic in Afghanistan.

He also did a news conference from Kansas City, MO. recently,, but claimed to be in St. Louis, a city on the other side of the state, some 250 miles away. (He was then corrected by his youngest daughter)

He also claimed that there were 57 states.

Shall we continue this gaff-fest-athon?

There is a reason why Obama has over 200 full-time staffers following and coaching his every move and speech...

Cause the guy doesn't know dick.

Some Guy:

Sorry, dude, no need to get in an uproar. I was just alluding to the fact that this is a site where people make bitchy comments about -- usually -- shitty movies, and -- sometimes -- celebs, fast food, stupid criminals, and, yes, politics. Your comment seemed a little more appropriate to the aggressive, antagonistic, mean-spirited environment that Politico has provided for axe-grinders on both sides of the left-right political debate.

So, just to clarify: no, I didn't think you *actually* were confused about which site you were on. I was just being a bit snarky about your comment. I realize that's the first time it's happened on this site (warning: being facetious) (oops, further warning: being facetious in previous parentheses), but, really, no offense intended, just trying to have a little fun.

Really, there are lots of sites to really get your dander up. Here we're just killing time until we can trash the 90210 premiere.

Alright, Some Guy, I'm sure we could trade "gaffes" all day. Nothing to say about the Keating Five scandal, then?

Genny,

You are correct. She is only 5 months along, and is therefore a few weeks short of the requirement. It isn't too late though, so keep your fingers crossed.

Kushiro,
I know you were being snarky, as was I. Until i start writing in all caps and using lots of exclamation points I am nowhere near an uproar. This is simply BSing.

Barbado:

Great point. I hope you will ammend your post to include every Liberal in office, or not, to include Al Gore, who believe in Man-made global warming and try to tell me that it is my fault, and that I must change MY ways to stop it.

Sean, I'll get back to you. It's me against the world, baby.

but Palin is a true blue American despite the fact that 10 years ago she wanted to ditch US citizenship and secede? Why is there not more attention given to this?

If you ever witnessed the dumbfounding majesty or Stone Mountain, you would know.

It really is a hoot to hear Southerners bray on and on about how they are real Americans, while fighting for the right to wave a flag that represents 1) a full-scale rebellion against the United States, 2) the attempt to create a seperate nation by essentially traitors to the duly-elected government, as well as 3) the egomania fueled by the then-booming cotton trade.

Oh, and the slavery thing. Then again, according to them, I should get over it.

There is a reason why Obama has over 200 full-time staffers following and coaching his every move and speech...Cause the guy doesn't know dick.

So being careful and making sure to fact-check, especially after you made some mistakes, IS A BAD THING?

Unlike McCain or Bush, who like to PROVE they don't know dick, and wallow in the ignorance like a fine bubble bath? And encourage others to not know dick?

P.S. Those MTG spoof cards were hilarious.

Verbal slips? At least he's not resorting to name calling like the comments up at the top.

oh, Don LaFontaine, RIP! I never want to hear a movie trailer again.

*sigh*

Which pill was it again that you have to take to wake up out of the Matrix? Was it the blue or red one, I can't remember? Whichever it is, I think I need to get the hell out of here because this election proves the Matrix definitely needs a reboot before it crashes and takes us all down with it.

I'm currently accepting applications for my crew of twelve.

Ooh, ooh, Skitts, I apply! I apply!

I would make an excellent Morlock, due to my massive bulk and hideously pale complexion and scraggly hair. Practically albino, I am. But in a hot way.

Some Guy:

I'm not making a partisan statement; I don't care what letters were next to the names of those involved. The facts are that McCain was close friends with Keating, took $112,000 in contributions from him, and invested over $350K in his properties. His being cleared of the charges doesn't change that.

The Ayers connection is basically bullshit and has been shown to be such by anyone with more than two brain cells. Rezko's kickbacks didn't cause the collapse of an industry nationwide. And the money from said kickbacks that allegedly went into Obama's Senate coffers was donated to charity.

I maintain that McCain's association with Keating and his ilk is more relevant, although certainly less known.

Mighty God,

Of course they didn't stick. The MSM didn't report on it.

Sean,

Ayers is still under investigation. Obama hasn't been cleared of shit yet. And he still got his mansion for well-under market value through improper means. And once McCain learned of the wrong doing, he paid Keating back.

2. Who says only Republicans use fear to attract voters?

http://www.philly.com/dailynews/opinion/20080902_Fatimah_Ali__We_need_Obama__not_4_more_years_of_George_Bush.html

We can name call back and forth all we like, but no one here has the audacity to suggest that this Alaskan governor, even begins to be qualified to play in the international arena.

That is what VPs, do, by the way.

This is some "conservative" house frau's wet dream, nothing more.

Some Guy:

Pointing out, "that of the 5 men involved, 4 are listed with a 'D' next to their name, while one has an 'R.'" is all well and good, but that doesn't really say anything about McCain OR Obama.

Unless you're going to argue that every member of a party agrees/is the same. Let's not be silly.

Also, I wouldn't care if McCain was 40. If he's elected and something happens to him, Palin is Prez and I'm moving somewhere the US of A can never find me ...

BSlim, I hope you're not implying there's something wrong with Butthole Illinois dive bars. Some of my best karaoke has occurred in said bars.

Look, Dick Cheney was just looking for some hot Ryan Renyolds shots, now your comments have him all flustered. Don't make a VP get his shotgun bitches!

Murderbug!!

Awesome.

Che,

You make some compelling points. I'm all for canonizing the Murderbug; surely Godtopus has need of an archangel?

Secondly, I must say I'm not terribly impressed with the panda, either. They're pretty much the animal kingdom's version of humanity in fifty or so years: over-eating fatasses with little to no interest in anything resembling physical activity who can't even engage in sexual intercourse without medical and/or pharmaceutical intervention.

Good riddance, I say!

Mella, could you step to the left for me? Ignore the bull's eye.

Just to let you all know, I agree that Palin is an under-qualified choice for VP.

However, I would rather have a VP pick with less qualifications than pick a pres. candidate with only slightly more qualifications than said under-qualified VP candidate,

That is if you consider "community organizer" and state senator to be real qualifications...

Again, someone remind me why Obama is claiming that he is more qualified than Palin, when Obama should in fact be comparing himself to McCain...?

And where is the love for Biden?

His response to Palin as the VP pick?

"She's attractive"

Have fun in the debates!

All that having been said:

I am looking forward to an orderly election, which will eliminate the need for a violent blood bath.

VOTE KANG!

Vote for none of the above...rational anarchy is the only answer.

Again, someone remind me why Obama is claiming that he is more qualified than Palin, when Obama should in fact be comparing himself to McCain...?

1) Because whenever he did try to compare himself to McCain, his opponents (like yourself) would pull the "experience" card over and over again. So to have them do so when someone so hugely out of the loop as Palin (who didn't even know what the VP does; it isn't that hard, they just break Senate votes and ask if the Pres has a fever) is being touted as their pick is fairly hypocritical. This leads into....

2) McCain is not a spring chicken, and if he is honestly saying, out of all the people he could have chosen, that Palin is the person that he would entrust the country to if he was ever incapacitated, it says a lot for his decision-making skills.* At least Obama picked a guy who, if anything, can honestly say he has had a ton of the "experience" certain folks made issue of.

That is if you consider "community organizer" and state senator to be real qualifications...

As opposed to POW and state senator, or short term mayor and even shorter term governor with a dash of beauty queen? I would indeed.

And what is with the quotation marks? It isn't worthwhile for a guy to do something like that? Guy had to start someplace, didn't he? Might as well put "student" or "toddler" in there as well.

*This is of course based on the notion that McCain acknowledges his age and his mortality; if he doesn't, then he could pick a woodpecker for all he cared.

What I would like to know is since McCain opposed the pay equity bill on the grounds that pay disparity between genders is due to the fact that women need more "education and training", will he pay her less than a male vice-president if elected? If ever anyone had less education and training than the other candidates......

What the hell happened to my comment? I wanted to talk about Bibleman and now half of my comment gone. I CALL CONSPIRIMACY! YOU SONSABITCHES! WHYYYYY?

Architeuthis= Giant squid(= my unnatural obsession).
The Godtopus is my lord and savior, but there must be room on the Murdertank for a creature both huge and lithe, with serrated teeth on hundreds of suction cups, a razor-sharp beak and neutral buoyancy due to the presence of ammonium chloride throughout its body, also rendering it unpalatable for consumption. Not to mention the prehensile penis.
Please can I come aboard?
I also mix a mean dark & stormy.

Skitt - please consider me for a position in the MurderTank. I will leave the bloodsplattering fun to you and other members of the crew and dedicate myself to searching the aftermath, locating any heads still on torsos and chopping said noggins off -- because if there's one thing I've learned from soap operas and horror movies, they ain't truly dead unless they're decapitated. I will supply my own scythe.

The only thing I will require is room for two beer kegs - one for a rotating seasonal offering from Three Floyd's: Dark Lord, Dreadnaught, Alpha King, and Alpha Klaus; and one dedicated solely to Bell's cask-conditioned Two-Hearted Ale.

Wow. Lots of people hating on McCain because of his age and Palin because of her sex. You folks are supposed to be the enlightened bunch? Palin knew she was going to have a child with a birth defect, but chose not to have an abortion. Her teen daughter is having a child out of wedlock, but Palin stands behind her family and gives her child loving support. Yet she is a hypocrite? No. If she threw her daughter out or had an abortion that would be hypocritical. And the idea that her daughter's pregnancy is proof of anything is a reach. People, pick up your remote and turn off Keith Olberman. Its okay. Really.

I have yet to read to the bottom of the comment thread, but as a longtime Alaskan and a person of discernment, I would like to take this opportunity to publicly state that we are as confused as the rest of the country. We barely tolerate her as our governor; the thought of her being one heartbeat away from leading this country is giving some of us cause to reconsider that Secessionist stuff.

libraryliz, I neglected to notice you had already spoken for us in the Last Frontier. Yeah, what she said! Carry on.

And now word comes that Bristol's boo, Levi, is going to join the family at the convention, I shit you not. Well at least we know that McCain and Palin will both be able to answer that three a.m call, because McCain will be up trying to pee, and Sarah will be up changing diapers, her grand daughter's not McCain's.

Hmm, JP:

My comment was to point out that McCain opposes equal pay for women who do the same job as men. How you translated that into gender hating I'll never know. But then again, literacy has never been a priority for Republicans, has it? Perhaps you could learn how to parse a sentence and get back to us? That's if you can find an adult literacy program that hasn't been torn to shreds by the current administration.

oh, hey, skitt, over here, yoo-hoo!! *waves*
i volunteer for murdertank crew! what with the bionics and all, chances are good when the zombie hordes attack they'll get a bionic part, and i'll live to fight another day!!

so, like, what's up with the bibleman comment?? what's ol' willie up to now???

Oh, and let's see, let's not give them birth control, (or the choice to abort) yet let's cut all welfare and food stamps, WIC and medical etc.

WHO DA FUCK IS GONNA PAY? that teen mom sure as hell ain't goin' to SHE'S got A FUCKIN' kid to take care of, the "dad" is just some fuckin' loser who hasn't even finished high school. Ooooh but that's right, once the fetus gets born it stops being an issue.

Is "The Lord" gonna feed them.

I'm sorry, Paddy, was I walking to you? No matter. I am always willing to consider a well-formulated position proffered by a reasonable person such as yourself. But you seem to be playing fast and loose with facts here. I don't recall McCain actually oppossing equal pay. As I recall, the only thing he was against was the Senate creating a law that would overturn a Supreme Court decision regarding the statute of limitations for filing a PAY discrimination lawsuit. The person waited 19 years. Hardly a vote against equal pay. More like McCain is against lawyers. Hey, thats me! He said, "If you eliminate the statutes of limitations, and you make it unending, you may be violating the rights of the individuals who are being sued, whether they're a man or a woman," the senator responded. "I don't think you're doing anything to help the rights of women, except maybe help trial lawyers and others in that profession." As an attorney whose been on both ends of the table, I couldn't agree with him more.

Let us also recall, shall we, that this is ALSO the Alaskan governor who AFTER insisting on ABSTINENCE ONLY sex ed (OXYMORON ALERT) for her precious angel -- CUT FUNDING FOR PREGNANT TEENS in her great state!

Ding ding ding ding!

We HAVE a loser!

You want linkage!

YOU GOT LINKAGE!

http://voices.washingtonpost.com/the-trail/2008/09/02/palin_slashed_funding_to_help.html?hpid=artslot

Oh, JP, I almost feel sorry for you, you pitiful tadpole, swimmin' in the big pond.

Now, tell the truth... would YOU name YOUR Downs' Syndrome baby after a level of higher math?

Just wondering.

I thought lawyers were supposed to have more of a facility with words than this...

Maybe just the ones in the top two-thirds of their graduatings classes...

Ah, well. Someone's got to be at the bottom.

O'Connor you're so right, what the fuck is a high-end lawyer doing on a movie review site in the middle of the night debating teenage pregnancy with motherfuckers by the name of Pookie, B-Slim, and P-dog?

Yes, him and F. Lee Bailey are no doubt sitting in a bar and talking about old times and all the big cases they had.

Wow, you guys are really hurting my feelings. I'm sorry, Pookie, did an attorney get you evicted from your cardboard box again? Why all the hate? Ah, just the other day I thought I read somewhere that a regular contributor to this site was an attorney appearing before the Court of Appeals in California. Must of imagined that one. And I have to be an ambulance chaser because I dont support laws that make it easier to file lawsuits. That makes sense. Let me see.... The latest round of arguments seems to based on the premise that if once you dont succeed, spend more and more. The cardinal rule in government spending is spend it all, or you wont get more next time. People, if a particular program in Alaska doesn't need 5 mil, its actually okay to cut the spending on it. And this idea that her daughter's pregnancy is proof of anything is like saying one person who fails an English or math class is proof that the class doesn't work. What a lame argument. But I must agree it is silly for me to be arguing this subject matter with a bunch of jerkoffs when I can be dining on caviar, sipping champagne, boinking the maid, driving my Lambo and living in my Eastside apartment in the sky. Hopefully we can be friends again tomorrow when I mindlessly follow along the Pajiba herd. Goodnight, all.

skitt?
please?
i'm begging now-- in godtopus' name, PUT ME ON THAT DAMN TANK!
i can swear like a sailor, and i'm a dead on shot with a baseball,
stacey will give me a reference!
this place is starting to give me the heebs....
i'll bring key lime pie...

Diamond in the back, sunroof top, diggin the scene
with a gangsta lean wooh-ooh-ooh

Wrong JP, so wrong. It wasn't "just" a Supreme Court case (nice respect for the law there by the way). It was a bill in Congress, the Ledbetter Bill to be precise and his exact words were that pay equity wasn't needed because "different pay for women is related to less education and training". Since when has quoting a candidate's exact position on an issue become "playing with the facts"?

Good morning, Paddy. There are a number of problems with your response to me, but I will leave it at this: You didn't even quote ME correctly, and my post is right up there for you to read over and over again. Where is this "just" coming from? Your reading comprehension is terrible.

JP, JP, JP - Oh, dear, dear, dear: I'm not sure if you're ready for this.

I'm going to be generous and give you some time to reconsider.

Because I am on medication, and honey, I'm so many generations removed from the first female douchebag -- now SHE would have happily swallowed you WHOLE.

Whereas I... I, sweetheart, have a conscience. I tend to give people a chance to get away. A few chances, really. Ask anyone who's read, for instance, THIS thread:

http://www.pajiba.com/traitor.htm

And that was just PRACTICE. WIth a FRIEND.

Now just... walk away for a few minutes. And think hard...

"Do I really want to be intellectually and verbally humiliated in front of a bunch of strangers, even if anonymously, by an LIBERAL, Obama-lovin' admitted recovered alcoholic who hasn't had a drink in almost TWELVE YEARS, on MEDICATION, for chrissakes -- when I could just disappear into the ether, never to be heard from again?"

Aaaaaaaaaaand this thread is dead.

Thanks, kids. No go be a dear and make Mommy another martini.

Mary, Mary, quite contrary. I have a job. Can't monitor this thing all day. To delve deeper into a silly spat with you would be like having an argument with my senile neighbor. Sure I would win, but what fun would it be. I have been posting on this site for some time now, so alas I will be heard from again. Just not on this post. So have at it. I wont hold it againt you. Or care. That would be giving your ramblings and bile too much credit. Good day.

word

Nader/Clinton '08!!!!