Pajiba Love 08/21/09

Celebrities Just Shouldn't Try to Answer ... Things

By Stacey Nosek | Posted Under Pajiba Love | Comments (36)

After the Patricia Heaton debacle, watching Snoop Dog try to answer a Watchmen question that you need absolutely no prior knowledge of Watchmen for whatsoever is difficult to watch not just for nerds, but for everybody. (Topless Robot)

Even though Avatar has only debuted a two-ish minute trailer, (until the screenings later today, anyway) it’s already being said to resemble as many as ten other movies. This does not bode well. (Spout)

If you wondered what Miley Cyrus’ father thought of her pole dancing at the Teen Choice Awards, well — since this is Billy Ray Cyrus we’re talking about here — obviously he was totally cool with it. (Webster’s)

Remember that “Kids in the Hall” project I told you about before? Well it’s now set to air on the CBC in January. Does the internet get CBC? (Variety)

Oooh! Alanis Morissette is planning to write a juicy tell-all biography, in which hopefully she’ll spill the dirt on Ryan Reynolds. And maybe Dave Coullier, if we’re lucky. (Celebitchy)

What if movie titles were written by the internet? Or shall I say, how long before movie titles are written by the internet? (Gordon and the Whale)

Just in case anyone forgot — with his documentary and high-profile cameo in The Hangover — what a low-life, abusive scumbag Mike Tyson really is, please allow me to direct you to this footage from a 2002 press conference. (FourFour)

Lindsay Lohan has been passed up for a new “coming of age” movie about a teenage girl since she basically looks like a 40-year-old meth whore. Well thanks, Captian Obvious. (Yeeeah!)

Want to inexplicably draw even more attention to your big, fat ass? Well lucky for you, this new product has just the answer! Thanks to JapJay for pointing this out. (Winkers)

And here’s the perfect accessory to go along with your new weird, ass pants. Thanks, Tamatha! (Craftastrophe)

And now, a word from Barney Frank’s dining room table. (Holy Taco)

Here’s a behind-the-scenes account from an audience member from the MTV show “It’s On With Alexa Chung.” Yeah, that title didn’t register with me whatsoever, either. (Zelda Lily)

Reader NJ sent me in this clip, and completely out of context, I have no idea what in the fuck is going on here. But somehow I still feel compelled to share it with all of you:

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.

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Comments

I'm sorry but that Google ad with Brendan Gleeson makes it look like he's in a British remake of Home Alone. Think we could get Colin Farrell in on the fun?

Posted by: DoctorControversy at August 21, 2009 1:08 PM

Oh, yay, the Kids! Between a KITH reunion and the recent release of The State DVDs, my inner teenager is rejoicing. Those were my GUYS when I was in high school.

Posted by: Sheri at August 21, 2009 1:14 PM

"Cat on my head, cat on my head"
"Tiny bit of evil, little bit of evil"
"Someone has captured sexboy!"
"I'm not being sarcastic. No!!! This is just a little speech impediment. I can't help it."
"Wait a minute, Joe. If what you're saying is true...then I still don't care."
"No, actually I'm Canadian. That's like American but without a gun."

Anyone who loves Kids in the Hall will get it. If you don't, whatever. I can't educate everyone.

Posted by: Xtreme at August 21, 2009 1:15 PM

Those pants... my god, those pants. They not only look ridiculous, but also incredibly uncomfortable.

Oh, and yes, thanks, Tamatha, for making sure my gag reflex is still in prime working condition. (It is, in case you were wondering.) Thanks ever so.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at August 21, 2009 1:16 PM

That video was one of the creepiest things I've ever seen.

Posted by: annoyingmouse at August 21, 2009 1:19 PM

After seeing the picture, I had to youtube the clips of Connery saying "Suck on it, Trebek"

Posted by: alphawhiskey at August 21, 2009 1:22 PM

Those pants confuse me because my pants don't fold up into my thigh like that when I walk. Do they have sticky stuff on the inside to make them do that? It seems really uncomfortable and, you know, not exactly flattering.

And that egg broach has officially put me off eggs. Ew. Well, maybe not hard boiled, deviled, or scrambled, but it's gonna take me a while on anything where the yolk is visible like that.

Posted by: Rusty (formerly Genny) at August 21, 2009 1:24 PM

The kid in the video did his own stunts. I'm impressed.

Posted by: Lucas at August 21, 2009 1:30 PM

I realized last night that "Avatar" also reminds me of the sorta-panther-people in "Hunters Of Dune" who were mostly treated like livestock. The one of them was kept in a cell on the spaceship and was trying to break out.

Posted by: Jay at August 21, 2009 1:35 PM

The fact that there wasn't a SNL clip on this page makes me angry. false advertising.

Posted by: buttercup at August 21, 2009 1:36 PM

Maybe ALL of our pants fold up into our thighs like that, Rusty. Maybe it's like 80's clothing. You know where you think things are okay looking because you're completely oblivious that things are NOT okay looking.

Let's make Friday* "Check Out Asses for Possible 'Winking' Day"!

*Friday is also known as every other day of the week for me.

Posted by: JapJay at August 21, 2009 1:38 PM

Those wanker (winker?) pants suddenly make the Humpty Dumpty face seem refreshingly normal.

Unfortunately, the only people who are going to be able to make those pants wink, are fat people whose pants don't fit. I think I can predict how those pants were invented, too. Fat person sits in something that sticks to their butt. They get up and walk and someone behind them mentions how the spot keeps disappearing and reappearing.

Posted by: BWeaves at August 21, 2009 1:44 PM

Oh, and yes, thanks, Tamatha, for making sure my gag reflex is still in prime working condition. (It is, in case you were wondering.) Thanks ever so.

Oh dear AvB, most of around here thought you'd surpassed that years ago.

Posted by: Xtreme at August 21, 2009 1:45 PM

Here's the thing. There's already a really entertaining piece set in the "Avatar" world available - THE FUCKING "AVATAR" SERIES? What the process of making it (a) live action and (b) shorter did they think would improve it? Are either one of those magical recipes for "better?" I wasn't aware.

Posted by: Landon at August 21, 2009 1:45 PM

"Wait a minute, Joe. If what you're saying is true...then I still don't care."

Just to be "that guy" - the above quote is actually from Newsradio, not KITH.

Posted by: Casey at August 21, 2009 1:59 PM

Aww Lindsey. Poor thing. I still totally would though. Speaking of crazy bitches that dining room table chick... kind of hot.

Jesus, I really need to start dating again.

Posted by: TSF at August 21, 2009 2:00 PM

Has anyone actually bought the egg broach? I just...this is disturbing to me on so many levels.
I mean, I like fried eggs, but not enough to shellac one and wear it.

Posted by: Jeni at August 21, 2009 2:12 PM

Those winker pants are butt-ugly. It had to be said.

Posted by: Cuca at August 21, 2009 2:23 PM

RE: Egg broaches.

I've actually seen sardine broaches, and they were, I hate to say this, cute.

Posted by: BWeaves at August 21, 2009 3:12 PM

Death Comes To Town is being edited where I work. I've seen the first days footage, and everyone looks like they've swelled.

Posted by: Groundloop at August 21, 2009 3:46 PM

That winker/whatever website is failure in at least 5 different ways, forget about the pants.

Black background on a website is never a good idea. Why does anybody still do it?

Posted by: Slash at August 21, 2009 3:47 PM

Um...I'm pretty sure my pants do that (not that I'm ever gonna wear any that actually wink at you). I don't think there's pants in the world that could fit my ass in a way that didn't do that. It's just the way your body moves when you've got a booty. And nobody who isn't crazy/a southern Californian would call me fat. (true story: a guy hit on me the other day and said he was "into the whole BBW thing." Only in the OC could a size 2 with a size 4 ass be considered a "BBW.")

Posted by: s. pisaster at August 21, 2009 3:54 PM

What the HELL was that clip from?

The internet title for "Brokeback Mountain" made me laugh. I suppose that would be another one - take any comedy & rename it "LOL."

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at August 21, 2009 5:07 PM

Those pants top out at over $500! Hahahaha!

Posted by: snapnhiss at August 21, 2009 5:35 PM

My ass most certainly winks like that when the pants are snug. Hell yes it does. It is also round and firm and a perfect compliment to the DD's up front. That is just the way it is.
That said, those pants are ridiculous. $500?
That is a voluntary tax on stupidity.

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at August 21, 2009 5:55 PM

Not when it comes to gross food or food-like items, Xtreme. In those cases, it is still finely tuned.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at August 21, 2009 6:32 PM

S., what is a BBW?

Posted by: Cuca at August 21, 2009 7:52 PM

Ohhhh look it up.

Look up WAM too. You'll have lots of fun!

It's just the way your body moves when you've got a booty.

Yeah, it's terrible. If only everyone could just have two baseballs like that girl in "The Unborn", huh?

Posted by: Jay at August 21, 2009 8:20 PM

Remember that “Kids in the Hall” project I told you about before? Well it’s now set to air on the CBC in January. Does the internet get CBC?

Ohhhhh, what's this? Finally, it's our turn to have a tv show that y'all can't watch. THIS VIDEO IS NOT AVAILABLE IN YOUR COUNTRY, America! How does it feel? Does it BURN?!

Oh, who am I kidding. It'll probably be on the internet for everyone.

*kicks can*

Posted by: Lauren at August 21, 2009 9:52 PM

Uh oh, Jay got into the wine cellar again!

I tried to find WAM, with no luck (although I did already know what a BBW was). Help a girl out! Or, wait... maybe I don't wanna know.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at August 21, 2009 9:59 PM

"A good bottle of wine is its own occasion"

It means Wet And Messy.

And yes, that was a lie earlier about "booty".

Skinny women are evil, as the poet once said.

Posted by: Jay at August 21, 2009 10:31 PM

That clip was awesome. Lately I'm into watching just super weird shit that doesn't make sense, like that Eric and Tim show or The Mighty Boosh.

So that clip was loved.

Posted by: Snuggiepants the Deathbringer at August 21, 2009 11:18 PM

Oh, I got the two baseballs, Jay. Its just that they're up in my chest region.
Cuca, a bbw is a big beautiful woman. Not a bad thing to be, but other than the booty I'm pretty tiny.

Posted by: s. pisaster at August 22, 2009 12:44 AM

Lauren, I just wanted to assert that you rock. That was damn funny.

Posted by: replica at August 22, 2009 2:38 AM

Snuggiepants the Deathbringer, the mighty boosh does make sense, awesome, hilarious cross dressing sense with monkeys and jazz. Maybe its Camden thing.

Posted by: nieve at August 24, 2009 1:10 PM

"I'll take Anal Bum Covers, Alecksh"

Posted by: James at August 25, 2009 5:13 AM

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Celebrities Just Shouldn't Try to Answer ... Things

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