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Pajiba Love 08/17/09 | Pajiba - Scathing Reviews for Bitchy People

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Leno is Back With a "Meh"

Pajiba Love / Stacey Nosek

Pajiba Love | August 17, 2009 | Comments (32)

Jay Leno is less than a month away from airing his first show in his new time slot, which is awesome because now our parents don’t have to stay up so late, and guess who he’s picked for his first guest? Nope, lamer … (Warming Glow)

Alyssa Milano got married to some dude this week. Like, literally. I’ve never heard of the guy before, anyway. (Webster’s)

Inglorious Basterds isn’t even out yet and it’s already providing for some hilarious online spoofs. (Agent Bedhead)

Remember that guy who recorded everything Tracy Morgan said for the entire first season of “30 Rock?” Well now he’s taken on Don Draper. Enjoy. (Unlikely Words)

Because everyone else on the internet is making lists, Quentin Tarantino has complied his top twenty favorite movies of the past 17 years. (Rope of Silicon)

Has anyone heard of Darwin Deez? According to very reliable sources, he’s about to get huge, and I’m really digging on his stuff. So go check it. (TV Falls in the Woods)

I know I’ve posted this before, and it’s not even Friday, but I can’t resist reposting this old footage of Keanu Reeves at the teddy bear convention. (Gordon and the Whale)

Who wants their very own “True Blood” paper dolls? Not everyone all at once, now. (Frothy Girlz)

Apparently white people are really into camping. I’ll take a pass. Not a fan of pooping in the woods, myself. (Stuff White People Like)

Holy shit. A woman in Tunisia is pregnant with twelve whole babies. That’s like, most of the Duggar family right there. (DListed)

Supposedly everyone on the Iron Man set hates Gwyneth Paltrow’s skinny ass. I don’t know how much truth there is to the story, but I can’t help linking it because it fills me with glee regardless. (Celebitchy)

You know the guy who thought up Lord of the Flies had to be at least a little bit fucked up, but seriously? William Golding has admitted to attempted rape, among other things. Jesus. (Jezebel)

Apparently there are eight entire uses for the “@” symbol on twitter. I guess I really just don’t think all that much about twitter that this would have ever occurred to me. (mental floss)

This clip has been around for awhile, but illustrious reader Lauren sent it to me late last week in response to some dildo-related Pajiba Love commentary. Enjoy!

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.


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Comments

All I can think about is how hot Eric was even while sobbing over poor Godric. I'm still quite sad. And turned on. So there Julie!

Posted by: Cindy at August 17, 2009 1:09 PM

For a second I thought they were doing The Association. Rats.

Camping is bullshit-filled bullshit.

Posted by: Jay at August 17, 2009 1:12 PM

I hope the Eric doll has no clothing options...
:epic drool:

Posted by: Patty O'Green at August 17, 2009 1:17 PM

I had to check out the clip to see if it was about the small Newfoundland town of Dildo. Dammit, now that song's going to be stuck in my head all day.

You goofs, camping is awesome! Don't get me wrong, I don't do campsites without some sort of toilet facilities, but getting away from reality and back to nature for a while is just lovely. Besides, wakeup sex in a tent canNOT be beat.

Posted by: meaux at August 17, 2009 1:26 PM

Christ, Leno can't win with you.

You don't like him, nay you loathe him.

We. Get. It.

So it's official, Seinfeld was never "hip/cool/chic/with it," right?

Thing is, if Leno had booked the hottest, hippest most up the second cool person in the universe you would have destroyed him for it just like you are destroying him now for having Jerry Seinfeld be his first guest.

Ok, you're pissed off that he's going to be on 5 nights a week in primetime.

We. Get. It.

But so what? Seriously, would you rather have yet ANOTHER Law & Order spinoff or more Knight Rider or Bionic Woman remake episodes? It isn't Leno's fault that he's on five nights a week in primetime, it's YOUR fault for not watching whatever shit was on NBC at 10 o'clock last season and reporting it to Neilson, thus ensuring that said shit got better ratings and wasn't canceled.

Posted by: Fappy McFapper at August 17, 2009 1:26 PM

Can we all please add the word "Dildo" to the long list of words that sound awful but refer to wonderful things? Like moist panties?

Posted by: Jeremy Feist at August 17, 2009 1:30 PM

That header pic off Leno looks like he could use a dildo.

"Nah Jerry, you do it like this."

Posted by: admin at August 17, 2009 1:37 PM

Ok, I'm going to take exception with Fappy. NBC actually had a brilliant show on at 10pm called "Life" that myself and many other Pajibans watched. However, NBC insists upon frolicking around its own stale filth. Hell, that's why there were 7 nights of Law & Order.

Now grandmas everywhere can be entertained by the biting wit of primetime gems like Jaywalking and the Jay All-Stars and....ugh! The fact that they feel compelled to drill at the dried up Seinfeld well is just adding insult to injury. They are one step away from diggin up Johnny Carson's corpse and having it take over the 9pm slot.

If NBC had some ballas and was actually committed to quality original television, they might actual attract and keep viewers like they did 20 years ago.

Posted by: swingdude at August 17, 2009 1:49 PM

I'm with Fappy. You too-cool-for-everybody-else hipsters all thought Seinfeld was so great that you watched EVERY EPISODE, and even enjoyed the last two, which had to be the lamest series finale in the history of sitcomery, and now he's lame?

Sheesh, gimme a break.

-Ralphie

Posted by: Ralphie at August 17, 2009 1:49 PM

There is absolutely nothing hip about me whatsoever and even I can see that Jay Leno is lame. The guy's a hack. He's also incredibly boring. People don't dislike Seinfeld, he's just a completely boring choice for a first guest. At least he didn't pick Terry Bradshaw (note: every time I passed Leno's show he seemed to be interviewing Terry Bradshaw)

Posted by: becks at August 17, 2009 2:02 PM

Well, Stacey hates Jerry, but that's a known quantity.

Posted by: Jay at August 17, 2009 2:06 PM

Seinfeld, the show, was great and I watched every episode (and I'm sure most people here did). But it has become increasingly clear due to post-Seinfeld careers that Jerry Seinfeld (Bee Movie), Kramer (racist stuff and ill-fated TV show), George (ill-fated TV shows), and Elaine (well thought of TV show that is boring and filler) were not the reason why the show was so great. That reason was, obviously, Larry David.

Many of us can recognize talent without having to fear what other people think. Jay Leno? He showed talent in the past, but then got into a stale routine of non-humor for his shows. The fact that he picked Jerry Seinfeld isn't bad in the 'Dane Cook' sort of way, but more in the 'people who don't pay attention think he is good' sort of way. In many ways, it is the perfect choice for his first guest.

And the Dildo song was boring.

Posted by: fifteenkeys at August 17, 2009 2:07 PM

swingdude wrote: "NBC actually had a brilliant show on at 10PM called 'Life' that myself AND MANY OTHER PAJIBANS WATCHED."

Don't know about you, but where I come from 6 people does NOT constitute "many."

And Life had two entire seasons to establish, hold and build an audience and it failed. If it twas so "brilliant" why weren't you and the 6 other Pajibans out on the street corners shrieking about the show and how fantabulously great it was and how everyone in the universe had to watch it because it was the BESTEST. SHOW. EVAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Even better then Arrested Development.

Hmmm, why weren't you doing that, swingdude?

Was it because you and all of your hipster shit guzzling friends didn't want the show to become popular and have a bunch of "squares" watching it and thus, uncool?

Posted by: Fappy McFapper at August 17, 2009 2:21 PM

Does Seinfeld even do anything anymore? Not that you have to do anything to be famous nowadays, but...still. What the hell does that guy do? Has he just been riding on Seinfeld vibes for 10 years or what? making commercials and one animated movie? What?! Dude was never even that funny to begin with! That show was NEVER about him. It was all about the rest of the cast. And poor Jason Alexander is off rotting somewhere. But the unfunniest one of the bunch is still around? life's not fair.

TWELVE?! THE FUCK.

Well at least no one's gonna pay attention to the Duggars now. Ha. Fuckers.

Posted by: figgy at August 17, 2009 2:23 PM

fifteenkeys , I'm guessing Larry David is also why Seinfeld is Leno's first guest - Curb Your Enthusiasm is back a few days after Leno and features a multi-episode Seinfeld reunion.

Fappy, if you've read Pajiba longer than a month or two you'd have seen all seven of us bitching like crazy from day one of the cancellation rumors. You'd also know there are only two hipsters in all of Pajibaland, and they're both fake.

Posted by: Cindy at August 17, 2009 2:30 PM

Now Curb Your Enthusiasm is a great show. I'm sure we can all get behind that statement. Even you Fappy. Though I'm not positive since you seem to hate everything and everyone but Jay Leno and Seinfeld.

Posted by: becks at August 17, 2009 2:37 PM

I LOVE camping and prefer to think of it as Apocalypse Practice. Now ask me how if I'm so good at it, how the raccoons made off with my loaf of multigrain bread and and entire box of Sugar Pops.

We found the bread wrapper but not the cereal box, so I'm not fully convinced it wasn't New Zombies who haven't fully switched over to brains.


Posted by: Stacy D at August 17, 2009 2:37 PM

Hmm..... my day job as President of the Fappy McFapper Fan Club keeps me too busy to campaign.
Thanks man, that was fun! I never thought I'd see the day that I was called a hipster.

Seriously, Life was building a following when it got sidetracked by the writer's strike. NBC did little to promote it when it returned. They had already decided they were going to play it cheap.

The Leno daily show developed because they were afraid that he would haunt them from another network and placing him in primetime was cheaper that producing a regular series. It was the safe way to go and you have to admit that seems to be their M.O. now.

"Life" was not the best show "EVAH", it was interesting on several levels and had good acting. It set itself apart. It's nice to have options that are a little bit different than your cookie-cutter CSIs and Law & Orders.

Sure maybe I'm crying over spilled milk. It's sad. Especially since NBC isn't the worst. Their was a link the other day to the 20 Best Shows That Fox Cancelled Prematurely. Some really good original stuff there with "Firefly" topping the list. Hell, a lot of those shows had huge campaigns and still ended up in the toilet.

I'm just saying that the recycling of the same stars and shows all the time if getting old. If openly stating that makes me some kind of hipster doofus, then I can live with that.

Posted by: swingdude at August 17, 2009 2:48 PM

All of the Leno hatred is completely and utterly deserved.

And just to change the subject: Darwin Deez may indeed be the next big thing, but I'll never be able to tell by watching those clips. I think there was some music under all the hooting and hollering of drunken hipsters, but I can't be sure.

Posted by: lokiboy at August 17, 2009 2:49 PM

I'm with swingdude. NBC should not have cancelled Life which was definitely one of the better shows on network t.v. Fuck you NBC.

Posted by: Jadine at August 17, 2009 2:53 PM

Hee, Cindy. Damn it, I have to catch up, I missed the last two!

Also, I loved Seinfeld, I hate camping, and I just don't bother watch Leno.

Posted by: Julie at August 17, 2009 3:00 PM

Wow. For three films I was almost the same person as Quentin Tarrantino. Almost. Battle Royale isn't the best film of the last 17 years, but it's certainly up there. Then he started going off on action films and I felt human again.

Posted by: Robert at August 17, 2009 3:03 PM

Julie, you are missing out. Hotness overload.

Posted by: Cindy at August 17, 2009 3:25 PM

I hate camping, Jerry Seinfeld, "Seinfeld," Larry David and "Curb Your Enthusiasm." I never liked "Arrested Development" and never watched "Firefly." I'm also a black male. I'm like a goddamn Pajiba unicorn.

Posted by: Tracer Bullet at August 17, 2009 3:33 PM

I'm like a goddamn Pajiba unicorn.

It's why all the little girls here wanna ride ya.

Posted by: Stacy D at August 17, 2009 4:05 PM

"It's why all the little girls here wanna ride ya."

It would just be the virgins.

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at August 17, 2009 4:07 PM

As far as recycling old stars and old formats, well it's a proven formula and none of the networks are in this to lose money, they are in it to make money. And Leno's new show is from what I've read going to have a different format then the Tonight Show/late night talk show. Will it be radically different ala that 'tard level Andy Kaufmann show with him on the giant chair? No, 'cause that will kill off viewers, and that isn't what NBC wants.

An interesting battle that is shaping up is who gets what guests on Leno and Conan's shows.

You can say that Leno is too safe and too old fashioned, and that's a valid point. but there certainly is a place for that kind of thing on tv and quite frankly Conan's smirky, smarmy, "Hey I'm telling dick and shit and fart jokes and getting away with it because I'm using a puppet so that makes me hip and cool and with it!" schtick. lost it's hip/cool/with it factor the second time Triumph appeared on the show.

Posted by: Fappy McFapper at August 17, 2009 4:23 PM

It would just be the virgins...

After an all night Twilight marathon.

Posted by: admin at August 17, 2009 4:25 PM

Tarantino was right about Battle Royal and Miike's Audition is playing on Youtube and it is definitely worth watching on line because you sure as hell aren't going to find it at Blockbuster or Hollywood. Here is part one. Be ready for some seriously Japanese style creepiness. Too good to pass up.

Posted by: OscarTamerz at August 17, 2009 4:26 PM

I'm hoping Leno will suck all the bland jokes, bullshit guests, and Jonas Brothers appearances right out of Conan's show, like a much-needed Bounty towel of... suck.

(It's quite hot today. No brain. Fire bad, tree pretty. Conan book too many safety guest, need to grow back sack.)

Posted by: bev rage at August 17, 2009 6:17 PM

Hard to believe that two of the most bland, inoffensive, boring fat cat white dudes in entertainment history can incite such vitriol and debate. Leno sucks, Seinfeld isn't funny anymore, and who gives a rat's ass anyhow?

By the way, do you have to be a little girl to ride the unicorn? I can be reconstituted if virginity is a prereq....

Posted by: dawn at August 17, 2009 6:47 PM

I watched Life and I will miss it, as I had developed a rather unhealthy fixation with the hot ginger that is Damien Lewis. But I will get over it since I hardly watch network TV anymore.

But NBC has given more proof of why they lick mangy donkey ass. If they hadn't put Leno there, they would have put something even more heinous in that timeslot. These are the people who think we need two hours of "The Biggest Loser" every week. I cannot.

And camping sucks. I could never be white, y'all.

Posted by: greer at August 17, 2009 7:08 PM





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