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Pajiba Love 08/11/09 | Pajiba - Scathing Reviews for Bitchy People

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It's Naked Tuesday!

Pajiba Love / Stacey Nosek

Pajiba Love | August 11, 2009 | Comments (31)

Hey perverts, Mr. Skin put together the “Top 100 Nude Scenes from Mr. Skin.” But the list is totally safe for work, so you’ll just have to wait ‘til you get home and pause the DVD like usual. (Mr. Skin)

Fox is airing a two-hour documentary about that good for nothing Octomom. If we’ve never said it before, which we have, let’s say it now in unison: “EFF YOU, FOX.” (Warming Glow)

Miley Cyrus really upped the old “skank factor” at the Teen Choice Awards this year by actually using a stripper pole in her act. Good choice. (Webster’s)

Battlefield Earth topped this list of stupidest apocalypses, although I’m just amazed that anybody even knows what that movie was about. (Topless Robot)

Kathy Griffin interviewed Levi Johnston on the “Larry King Show” after inexplicably bringing him to the Teen Choice Awards as her date. (Celebitchy)

The Inglorious Basterds premiere happened last night, and you know what that means! Angelina Jolie wore something and now we can all talk about it! Woo! (DListed)

Wasn’t it great how the entire Jackson family turned out so wholesome and scandal-free? Yeah, that wasn’t one of Phil Donahue’s finer moments. (FourFour)

A wise man named Karl Pilkington once said that “everything that needs to be invented has been invented, and at this point we’re just messing around.” Judging by these “BK French Toast-Flavored Snacks,” I think I might actually believe him. (Impulsive Buy)

Here’s a list of the ten hottest female grifters in movies. (Screen Junkies)

Oh wow, Tara Reid actually scored an actual part in a movie … About a bar. I’m guessing she’s going for Drunken Patron #2? (Agent Bedhead)

OK, I admit that this slightly convinces me that cats are somewhat less stupid than I thought, but I’m still a dog person all the way. Because dogs rule, like the Pedigree commercial says. (Zelda Lily)

Oooooh Scream 4 spoiler alert! Gale Weathers and Deputy Dewey are married with a kid now! Just like in real life!! (SciFiWire)

Here’s a bunch of debunked “Sesame Street” rumors. I don’t care what anyone says, though, Bert and Ernie are totally doing it. (mental floss)

I don’t really know much about G.I. Joe at all (which one is Joe again?) so I’ll just have to assume that the star-studded “The Ballad of G.I. Joe” here is probably infinitely more entertaining than the movie:

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.


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Comments

S.H.I.T!
(Sure Happy It's Tuesday!)

Posted by: Odnon at August 11, 2009 1:07 PM

Every Tuesday is Naked Tuesday in the Bullet household. Though that is getting increasingly uncomfortable as Baby Bullet ages.

Posted by: Tracer Bullet at August 11, 2009 1:23 PM

Here’s a list of the ten hottest female grifters in movies. (Screen Junkies)
---
Glaring omissions:

Anjelica Huston
Annette Benning
"The Grifters"
+++
I can't be the only guy who's baffled that Jolie the succubus is considered to be The Hotness. Right?

Right?
+++
Waiting on the Miley porn video in 3 ... 2 ... 1 ...
+++
How come nobody's talking about "District 9" opening in two days? Thursday midnight show here. Who's with me?

Posted by: , (the commenter formerly known as bucdaddy) at August 11, 2009 1:24 PM

I'm with you bucdaddy.

Posted by: Cindy at August 11, 2009 1:30 PM

Hey perverts, Mr. Skin put together the “Top 100 Nude Scenes from Mr. Skin.”

I stopped here, and didn't go any further. You should have put this at the bottom. Anyway, a few complaints. They put Elizabeth Berkley's scene in Showgirls at #17 and Chloë (puke fucking ugly)Sevigny at #49 for The Brown Bunny (btw has anyone actually seen that movie? I've just seen the "scene." God bless the internet right?) but they put Mary Louise Weller in Animal House at #76? What the fuck? That's one of those scenes that is burned in my head from youth. They put two pieces of crap ahead of her?

On another note, I'm glad they put in Uschi Digard from The Kentucky Fried Movie on the list. #30 even. For those that haven't seen this gem, one of the best sex scenes ever! The soapy tits flopping against the shower door...awesome.

Am I still breathing?
*checks pulse*

Posted by: Deistbrawler at August 11, 2009 1:30 PM

Oh, that header picture... How many times have I closed my eyes, reached down, between my legs, and eased the seat back to that image?

Well if we're counting today:
- Once in the shower
- During road construction traffic (the screen capture is on my visor)
- At the McDonalds drive-through (extra napkins please!)
- Right now, as it's taken me fifteen minutes to type this one-handed...

Posted by: Skitz at August 11, 2009 1:41 PM

Yep, that grifter list has some bullllshit on it.

Fox is airing a two-hour documentary about that good for nothing Octomom. "It's gross".

Cats aren't stupid....they're evil shitheads.

Posted by: Jay at August 11, 2009 1:49 PM

Oh God... Phoebe Cates... there is no bunk here.... I'm just going to have to do it through clothing... under the desk. Jeebus, I hope my coworkers don't wonder what i'm doing with my hand...

Talk about images burnt into you childhood. Whew!

Posted by: logar at August 11, 2009 1:50 PM

I dared myself to watch The Brown Bunny. An hour and a half of him driving on a highway. 25 minutes of him crying in the most ear scratching falsetto. 5 minutes of blowjob. And two weeks of 'what the fuck was that?!

Thank godtopus for the sweet cleansing effect of Phoebe's Schmeebies

Posted by: Odnon at August 11, 2009 1:55 PM

I read Gale Weathers and Deputy Dewey are married with a kid now! as Carl Weathers and Deputy Dewey. Almost made me want to see Scream 3. Almost.

Posted by: icecreammang at August 11, 2009 2:03 PM

Can I just say I'm immensely fond of the large amount of boobs on Pajiba Love this week? Let's keep up the good work, Stace.

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at August 11, 2009 2:13 PM

Thank goodness; I can now sleep soundly knowing that Cookie Monster shall remain focused on the sugary goodness. I had actually heard these rumors (unlike most of them), and it made me very grouchy.

teehee:
http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b305/oooRandleooo/Funny%20Stuff/CookieMonsterOnDough.png

Posted by: Patty O'Green at August 11, 2009 2:13 PM

For those of you who have sat through Brown Bunny, you owe it to yourselves to read this review. My favorite line:

If this is a "feature film," then so are your old home movies, or videotapes from a convenience store's security camera.

Anyway, I don't care what anyone says. Bert and Ernie are total mo's. I realize it's in the show's best interest to pretend like there's nothing going on (what with so many Bible-beating, town-hall-mobbing, fans of Rush Limbaugh out there) but I truly believe Bert and Ernie are intended to represent a positive, realistic, loving relationship between two men. And I say more power to them.

Posted by: vercordio at August 11, 2009 2:19 PM

Dude, that Joe video is pure gold. What's the story behind this?

Posted by: mangrilla at August 11, 2009 2:25 PM

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at August 11, 2009 2:13 PM

And here I was about to complain about the lack of peen... Well, not "complain" per se, more like "bemoan". I mean, it is nice that there are so many boobs. They don't get enough exposure, of you ask me. But the peen gets even less, which, IMHO, is a travesty.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at August 11, 2009 2:26 PM

*if* you ask me. my typing skills have been blinded by the boobs.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at August 11, 2009 2:29 PM

I’ll just have to assume that the star-studded “The Ballad of G.I. Joe” here is probably infinitely more entertaining than the movie...

Spoiler Alert: It is. All the Mummy cameos in the world couldn't save that turkey.

Posted by: Doctor Controversy at August 11, 2009 2:29 PM

also missing from hottest grifters - Linda Fiorentino from the Last Seduction.

Posted by: ponch at August 11, 2009 2:34 PM

What's the story behind this?

No idea yet. A friend put in Facebook last night, I immediately grabbed it myself, but it's out of nowhere for me.

And they all look correct!

Posted by: Jay at August 11, 2009 2:37 PM

Was that Alan Tudyk as Shipwreck? And one of the Super Troopera weed dudes as Tomax/Xamot?

Wait...is that Ben Stiller doing something funny again?

Posted by: Vermillion at August 11, 2009 3:00 PM

Was that Alan Tudyk as Shipwreck? And one of the Super Troopera weed dudes as Tomax/Xamot?

Yep, go to the page, the full credits are listed. Didn't recognize Zartan.

Posted by: Jay at August 11, 2009 3:02 PM

Oh never mind. Wasn't Stiller. But I was right about the other two.

Posted by: Vermillion at August 11, 2009 3:06 PM

Didn't recognize Zartan.

Me neither. Damn, if he keeps this up, I might be able to forgive him for dumping MLP.

MIGHT.

Posted by: Vermillion at August 11, 2009 3:09 PM

Charlotte Ayanna in Love the Hard Way needs to be on that nude list.

To this day, I have yet to see an actress with breasts as gorgeous as hers. I mean it. Even my roommate had to stop blogging to comment "That gir's got some perfect titties!"
I was watching the movie for Adrien Brody, but I'll be damned if I didn't rewind that nude scene once or twice.

Posted by: Brie at August 11, 2009 3:15 PM

I might be able to forgive him for dumping MLP.

It's just one thing....but man does it glare. And for Danes? Jon Spencer coulda set him straight. Parker's FULL GROWN.

Posted by: Jay at August 11, 2009 3:17 PM

(which one is Joe again?)

Well, in the comics, there was Joe Colton, a World War II vet who founded the team.

I know you were joking, but yes, there was an actual G.I. Joe.

Posted by: Shadowen at August 11, 2009 3:27 PM

Brie, what about stupendous tits in the new Friday the 13th? Those were some stupendous tits.

Posted by: Deistbrawler at August 11, 2009 3:28 PM

Vinnie Jones as Destro and Henry Rollins as Duke? Fuck Yeah!

Posted by: admin at August 11, 2009 7:50 PM

Wanna join a hot and heated forum that discusses the truth about these big stars?
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Posted by: tallloving c o m at August 12, 2009 4:45 AM

@Skitz

eased the seat back

I have always misheard the line as "ease the seed back". Makes it dirtier or at least more graphic. Maybe we need to redo the misheard lyric diversion.

Posted by: ed newman at August 12, 2009 3:20 PM

I found a great dating site_____W e a l t h y D a t e r. C O M_____. .where you have the opportunity dreaming about dating a millionaire and make it true! u dont have to be a millionaire.but u can meet one. I thought everyone needed to meet some miracle after all the terrible stuff in the news and the economy .-----------------------------------------------

Posted by: k.lucy61 at August 13, 2009 3:57 AM





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