free counter with statistics Pajiba Love 07/31/07 | Pajiba - Scathing Reviews for Bitchy People

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Pajiba Love

Winnie Cooper (or, “Danica” as she prefers to be called) is writing a book about math for teenage girls. Just when we thought we couldn’t possibly love her any more. (Celebitchy)

And in another win for sassy, intelligent girls everywhere — “The Simple Life” bites the dust! (The Blemish)

Uh oh… Just wait til the Chinese realize they can actually sue McDonalds for the food being fattening and the coffee being hot. (QuizLaw)

Elaine Benes is going to be one happy frigging woman. (Feministing)

Manny continues to uphold his practice of bringing the finest in upscale humor and overall classiness to the internet. (Hispanic! At the Disco)

For those you thought Mormonism was only about polygamy and fashionable bonnets — well, according to this cartoon, I think it’s kinda racist, too. (A Girl Named Boo)

Fuck these spoiled little bitches. I got a pair of rollerblades for my 16th birthday. Rollerblades! (College Humor)

Have you finished Harry Potter and now you’re feeling lost, helpless, and more than a bit confused? Well, perhaps Ms. Rowling can help you through this. (The Leaky Caldron)

After the jump — give it up for an awesome lady who isn’t afraid to drop it like it’s hot at 63 years young.

Pajiba Love | July 31, 2007 | Comments (29)

(We should also mention that LL is a frequent advertiser on the site and even sells naughty stretch thongs — DR).


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Comments

winnie cooper...sigh...

Posted by: matt at July 31, 2007 4:04 PM

Yikes.
I mean, LethalLady really does look amazing, and is a very attractive woman, but I am wondering if perhaps her decision to dance and lip synch was a tad misguided?

Posted by: go big red at July 31, 2007 4:22 PM

Winnie Cooper is officially my hero.

Posted by: bonnie at July 31, 2007 4:23 PM

Um... a few comments

a) my 16th birthday was so negligible I don't even remember what I got. At least you got rollerblades. I think I may have gotten a bill for my share of the family car insurance and then dropped off at work.

b) I hope the sponge people have fixed whatever made my boyfriend (now husband) piss razorblades for 2 days.

c)Lethal lady would be hotter if she had any rhythm whatsoever and didn't dance like said husband who is the whitest man ever to live.

Posted by: wsapnin at July 31, 2007 4:27 PM

oohh..
and
d) I will definitely be buying the Winnie Cooper book for my daughter. Go Winnie!

Posted by: wsapnin at July 31, 2007 4:28 PM

Ah organized religion, the opium for the masses, fools. That's why I'm a strict Pagan, which allows me to satisfy my goatskin fetish and........ human sacrifice.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at July 31, 2007 4:35 PM

I remarked that Lethal Lady kind of dances like Bruce McCullough -- and I mean that in the most flattering way possible.

(For serious, I love her!)

Posted by: litelysalted at July 31, 2007 4:38 PM

Lethal Lady is my hero!
I don't know any 63 year olds that look like that.
Actually I don't think I know any 30 year olds that look that good.
Who cares about her dance moves?
She's amazing!

Posted by: chacilaroo at July 31, 2007 5:05 PM

Mormonism, holy shit! WHO KNEW?????

Posted by: courtney at July 31, 2007 5:16 PM

Poor Stan M. That Sweet 16 show is some of the worst bullshit I've ever seen. Just when you think MTV can't get worse, garbage like this pops up. What a waste of money.

Litely, be happy for your rollerblades. Especially since I knew a certain 13 year old girl who was dying for a pair (with fluorescent pink wheels, no less) but her parents thought it was a "phase" and didn't get them for her. Damnit.

Wow, Danica. Where was this book when I was flunking algebra? For the second time, anyway.

Posted by: Brie at July 31, 2007 5:26 PM

For my 16th birthday I got a clock radio, corned beef (from a can) and my crazy mom throwing said radio at me for some reason I have forgotten. I had a sucky sucky childhood. Thanks for reminding me, Pajiba.

On a happy note, I LOVE Winnie Cooper. Apparently my SO ran into her at a bar one night and proceeded to drool and stammer at her hotness for the next week. Yay for smart hot chicks. (I am a smart ugly chick, but half is better than nothing).

Posted by: vaguelyamish at July 31, 2007 5:34 PM

Mormonism, holy shit! WHO KNEW?????

Posted by: courtney at July 31, 2007 5:37 PM

Those who have been paying attention knew because they made it their business to inquire. Romney's odds of becoming the nominee for President are the same as those of the proverbial snowball in hell but not because those who will vote against him are knowledgeable. They will act on their prejudices and vote against a representative of what they consider a cult.

Posted by: rudy at July 31, 2007 6:05 PM

Oops! More importantly, I second (third?) (fourth?) the sighs for Winnie Cooper. Smart and hot, what a combo.

Poor Lethal Lady, why did not her gay son (or brother, or friend the church choir director) not discourage her from letting the local drag queen do her makeup? Rocking body and fun retro costumes but makeup applied with a spatula. There comes a certain age where we all must admit that we look better by "dark of bar".

Posted by: rudy at July 31, 2007 6:10 PM

The Sponge: GREAT news for women like me, who hate the way estrogen-based contraceptives make us feel. If you were too young for The Sponge back in the day, I urge you to go out and buy yourself a box! (Be sure to follow the directions.)

From the comments on Feministing: "I used the sponge for years. It was easy to use, there were no side effects, and no pregnancies while I was using it. However, should you use it, make sure your dog can't get in the trash where you put the used ones." I just felt the need to share that.

Posted by: Jerce at July 31, 2007 6:29 PM

I was teaching a middle school group of girls at my church about Mormonism and showed them this video (admittedly made by middle ground Christians and not LDS). We all giggled at the scene where God shows up at Mary's door, and there's just an awkward moment of her just looking at him. Who knew God did late night booty calls?

Posted by: Stacey at July 31, 2007 6:34 PM

Lethal Lady, please meet me at the Red Roof Inn by the airport for an afternoon of frolicking. You are indeed delectable, but the music video is highly disturbing, as is the colonoscopy-performing rectal ray-gun theme on the website. And isn't this all promoting some antiquated, objectifying view of womyn? (Help me, Bianca! Help me, Google! Oh, lord, help me, Gloria Steinem!)

Mormonism: It's no less a religion and no more a cult than Scientology -- but the fact is, they both believe in some whacked shit. The South Park episodes exploring the history and beliefs of Mormonism and Scientology were remarkably spot-on, which is to say, when one calmly and coldly analyzes their beliefs and the origin thereof, it's astonishing, amusing, and frightening, all at the same time.

Of course, I'm in that big ol' agnostic wedge o' Pajiba Demographic Pie. (Help me Keri Russell from Waitress!)

And Courtney: Don't lose your faith in rhetorical questions designed for humorous purposes.

Posted by: socalledonlycousins at July 31, 2007 7:17 PM

I think that Jehovah Witnesses have a possibly Saturday morning cartoon type origin as well.

This Saturday, see Invisible Jesus fight evil and bug you when you are trying to sleep off that Friday night bender! With new Faith Vision technology, only you can see Invisible Jesus as he prints Watchtowers and lift up chicks skirts (Hey, if God can hit it and quit it, I.J. must go all Hollow Man on a woman)!

Posted by: Vermillion at July 31, 2007 7:33 PM

My daughter is in middle school and has an attitude issue with math (though she's more than capable). However, she doesn't know Danica or her Winnie Cooper character from anyone else in the world. I realize the book might be good on its own, but I'm guessing from Danica's life-size pic on the cover that's supposed to carry some weight. Unfortunately I don't know of any middle school girls who will know or much care who she is, much less that she likes math.

But go Danica! (LOL.) I really do LOVE that this book is out and I hope it is positive for a lot of girls. I can just see my daughter going "Who? Pass."

Posted by: Kathy at July 31, 2007 8:09 PM

Oh and I remember EXACTLY what I got for my 16th birthday: a cheeseburger and fries and I'm SO not kidding. THAT is it. A cheeseburger and fries. Happy fucking birthday.

I hate that Super Sweet 16 show. What a pile of shite. What a great way to make every kid in the world feel shitty about their birthdays.

Posted by: Kathy at July 31, 2007 8:14 PM

You know... everytime I see that a shitty movie has been released nationally, everytime I read about some parent spending 100,000 dollars on sweet 16 party, or any other ludicrous waste of cash...

All I can think of is how many college educations that could pay for, or how many people could be taken out of debt... it's depressing.

Posted by: Eric at July 31, 2007 8:42 PM

Thanks for sharing Jerce

Posted by: Brian at July 31, 2007 9:30 PM

I really like the idea of teaching girls that being smart is cool, but does it HAVE to be done with things like "your horoscope inside"? I'm pretty sure my middle school eyes would have rolled right out of my head if I saw that. But still, major props to Danica for even making the attempt.

As for the Mormon vid...I'm not so sure I'd believe something so obviously biased. It'd be like taking Jack Chick's pamphlets about, well, anything seriously. From what I know about Mormon theology, some of that is accurate, but a lot of it is exaggerated, taken out of context, or purposely made to look silly.

Also, count me in with the people who did nada for their sixteenth birthday. We were waaay too poor for that.

Posted by: Marie at July 31, 2007 10:15 PM

Marie: I think the reason Danica's book has stuff like that in there is because it is being marketed to the girls who need it most; which would be gullible, trendy pre-adolescents that have begun the death spiral by buying into Bratz and MTV. By tapping into what these girls think is "cool", they can surreptitiously slip in the real stuff. Then at least there will be some fashionista 15-year-olds who can do enough math to know that My Super Sweet 16 is utter bullshit.

I mean, we can only hope.

Posted by: Vermillion at July 31, 2007 11:20 PM

I just don´t get it...your turning 16 so fucking what, I have never undrestood the whole super sweet 16 shit. I once peepd a video of a girl geting a red Saab convertible for her 16th birthday, the bitch threw a hissy fit, crying and screaming that it wasnt blue, "if I come driving a red car to school everybody will think I am a freek." That video got me so mad I actualy thought about buying a flight to whatever the state was that she was from just to smack some sens into her.

Its not a huge thing to reach the age of 16 mtv should hold a super sweet 80 now that is an acomplishment. Cant you just see it, Tom Jones arriving at the old folks home, one old girl telling other 80 year old women that they are bitches and were never invited. Now that I would watch.

Posted by: 13thDuke at August 1, 2007 10:24 AM

"Endless celestial sex", huh? Mormons:1 Jews:0

Posted by: J at August 1, 2007 12:55 PM

I'm reposting my comment from the jump. This is in regards to the "Mormon Video":

I was raised Mormon and have no grudge toward the church. I've since left because I function happier outside of organized religion.

That being said,
Aside from the video's content (which is offensive because it's MADE to be offensive) is the egregious way it is being presented here. If you go to the YouTube page and read the description, this WAS NOT put out by the church. It's a propaganda piece.

If you find this informative, maybe you will find facts, truth and enlightenment in "Birth of a Nation", "The Battleship Potemkin", and "Triumph of the Will".

Honestly, shame on all of you who are quick to post a disparaging comment without doing the slightest research of what you're forming your opinions around.

I mean really, if you believed this I see how advertising works.

Great animation by the way.

Posted by: John at August 1, 2007 1:10 PM

Do you work for the Mormon church or something?

Posted by: Bebad at August 1, 2007 2:06 PM

No. I just hate misinformation and believe me, you're being misinformed. In this day and age credibility is king.
Don't me wrong, I'm not a practicing member of the church and that's because of my own personal reasons.

I just take offense when people are this venomous and flat out lie to get their agenda across. I'm sure if you knew the facts of something and saw people being manipulated, you'd speak up too. I hope you would.

Anyway, let me quote from the guy who actually posted this on YouTube:

"If you question the content, you should read the Book of Mormon. I have no idea how much of this cartoon you'll find in there, but this is the one place you can find out for yourself.

For those of you who appreciate this as an absurd piece of propaganda from an extreme fringe group of people who are generally nasty to everyone... you seem to be the minority and should probably find out if you are covered for psychological counseling... it didn't help me, but it was a relaxing way to spend an hour every week!"

Posted by: John at August 1, 2007 2:46 PM