free counter with statistics Pajiba Love 06/29/09 | Pajiba - Scathing Reviews for Bitchy People

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The Yelling Man Will Yell No More

Pajiba Love / Stacey Nosek

Pajiba Love | June 29, 2009 | Comments (39)

What the … ? I mean, seriously now. Farrah and Michael Jackson I can understand, (cancer/drug abuse, eating disorder, etc., etc.) but how the hell does Billy Mays just drop dead for no apparent reason? (Webster’s)

On that note, the size of the celebrity is relative to the amount of time it takes for memorial cakes to start popping up at the grocery store. (Cake Wrecks)

Some of the details of Michael Jackson’s autopsy have been leaked and they are just downright goddamn horrifying. (Celebitchy)

Here are 12 things Woody Allen just doesn’t get. I guess this is why he kind of ends up making the same movie over and over again. (A.V. Club)

How well do you know your Garbage Pail Kids? I gave up halfway through this quiz, but sent it to my boyfriend who actually got 18 out of 18. Also, he is basically Charlie from “It’s Always Sunny.” (mental floss)

Nick Frost and Simon Pegg have put together a production blog for their upcoming movie Paul, which they’re currently filming. (Via Film School Rejects) (What Is Paul?)

This is news which will likely appeal to very few of you, but “It’s Garry Shandling’s Show” is finally coming to DVD. Hooray! Now if we can just get Seasons two through five of “Larry Sanders.” (TV Shows on DVD)

The internet is already getting excited just for the trailer for Boondock Saints 2, which is coming out next month. That gives fans a whole month to actually believe that it might not totally suck. (Screen Rant)

And now, Skids and Mudflap would like to apologize for what was misconstrued by some as racism in the new Transformers movie. (Mighty God King)

Fred Durst honors Michael Jackson; is a mouth breathing idiot. (Film Drunk)

“Bruno” went on Conan last week, and guess where he put his nuts?? No really, guess!! If you said “on Conan’s face,” you win a cigar. (Popoholic)

Who wore it better? Katy Perry vs. Jeremy Feist edition. Somewhat NSFW! (Notes on Bar Napkins)

Finally, in honor of Billy Mays passing, here’s the kind of unabashed, American entrepreneurism which would have made him proud. Thanks to Melissa!

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.


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Comments

No disrespect, but I kinda hope whoever does the eulogy for Billy Mays shouts the whole damned thing. It'd definitely be fitting...

Posted by: Skitz at June 29, 2009 1:05 PM

Update on the Jackson story: fake.

I can't believe all of it's fake, just look at the man. He had 14 noses in his life, and was known to have substance problems throughout his life. It's like an opposite world version of Marlon Brando's autopsy.

Posted by: George at June 29, 2009 1:15 PM

Boondock Saints, for crying out loud...
And suck though it may, I am already excited about renting it!

Posted by: Patty O'Green at June 29, 2009 1:17 PM

Billy Mays either died from his terrible OxyClean addiction (he was snorting four buckets a day) or the glue he used to hold his beard in place poisoned him.

Is it me, or is Woody Allen just an older, more intelligent version of Michael Cera? The biggest difference is that Allen is smart enough to make his own movies so he can make sure legions of hot women are attracted to mopey, pathetic nebbishes.

Posted by: Tracer Bullet at June 29, 2009 1:22 PM

I'm kind of more upset over Billy Mays than I am over Michael Jackson. I think it's because it was so much more sudden (not counting the apparent threat of an embolism or cardiac arrest). I just got into Pitchmen a couple weeks ago, and I really liked Billy. He was way funnier and more interesting than his commercials would lead you to believe.

But seriously, who the hell doesn't wear a seat belt when the plane is landing?

Posted by: Snath at June 29, 2009 1:23 PM

They should have Vince Shlomi do the eulogy for Billy Mays.

As for The Boondock Saints 2...I skipped around my apartment. In a discussion with the roomie we tried to guess how bad this movie would be in comparison to the first one. We have no doubt that it won't be as good, but we still think it will be entertaining. Then again, what sequels are better then the original?

Posted by: DeistBrawler at June 29, 2009 1:41 PM

Snath-
I'm with you. I feel bad that I am more saddenned by Billy's death than Michael Jackson's. I also just started watching Pitchmen, and he seemed to be a genuinely good guy.

Posted by: chad at June 29, 2009 1:43 PM

If only he had his seatbelt on, that (alleged) suitcase wouldn't have (allegedly) hit him in the head. Wait. What?

Posted by: Enochroot at June 29, 2009 1:50 PM

If only he had his seatbelt on, that (alleged) suitcase wouldn't have (allegedly) hit him in the head. Wait. What?

Is that what happened? I only know the FAA said whatever injury he sustained was his fault because he wasn't wearing a seat belt. They win at empathy.

Posted by: Snath at June 29, 2009 1:54 PM

I don't want anything to do with that pissing wedge. What kind of idiot would invent an oversized golf club to drain your trouser trout into when you're on a golf course. Man the fuck up and use a tree.

Now, if Billy Mays were selling it, I'd buy two.

Posted by: admin at June 29, 2009 1:55 PM

Just for the record, Mighty Putty is pure shit. It doesn't hold anything together for the long term. Sure it might seem super-strong at the beginning, but it can't hold forever. Waste of money in the extreme, just like ShamWow (putting the Sham back in "Why the fuck did we spend money on this again?").

Posted by: Snath at June 29, 2009 2:04 PM

Mays had said he was hit in the head with something (still, I'm missing the airline's correlation between seatbelts and falling objects) but according to this page, there was no head trauma: tmz

Posted by: Enochroot at June 29, 2009 2:09 PM

Anyone besides me REALLY, REAlly REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, REALLY sick and tired of the whole "Bruno" thing? Gee, Americans get uncomfortable and don't like it when the worlds biggest drama queen attention whore faggot starts his faggoty act. I never saw that coming.

Please.

SBC is a one note comedian and that not died the second week of Borat's release.

Posted by: AstonishingPenis at June 29, 2009 2:10 PM

In other "They're Dropping Like Fucking Flies" news, Fred Travalena passed away. Some of us old folks will remember him as an impersonator and comedian from The Tonight Show and other places. Chalk up another one in the cancer sucks column. If I was 50 (like Jackson or Mays), or an impersonator (like Travalena or Danny Gans, who died in May) I would not be closing my eyes any time soon.

Posted by: slower lower at June 29, 2009 2:11 PM

Billy Mays either died from his terrible OxyClean addiction (he was snorting four buckets a day) or the glue he used to hold his beard in place poisoned him.

That or Anthony Sullivan decided to enable a little "accident" on Pitchmen.

Can I just say that, while being really funny, that MGK strip made me really, REALLY want that Grimlock toy?

Posted by: Vermillion at June 29, 2009 2:12 PM

I believe the seatbelt/suitcase thing is basically, if he was in his seat with the belt on, he wouldn't have been in the position to get hit by falling luggage.

Of course, without knowing the kind of plane, that is just a guess.

Posted by: Vermillion at June 29, 2009 2:19 PM

I'm about to turn 50 in a couple of weeks, and I'm damned depressed. I thought it wouldn't bother me, but all these 50 year olds dropping like flies is not doing anything towards a good night's sleep.

Posted by: BWeaves at June 29, 2009 2:20 PM

In the Hurricane of Celebrity Death (TM) that was last week, Gale Storm's passing barely gets a breeze of attention.

Well, timing is everything, they say.

Posted by: , (the commenter formerly known as bucdaddy) at June 29, 2009 2:20 PM

, I mentioned Gale Storm's death on a previous Pajiba thread, but I think you and I are the only Pajibans who know who she was.

MY LITTLE MARGIE, people!

Posted by: BWeaves at June 29, 2009 2:22 PM

You're right bucdaddy, that blows.

Posted by: slower lower at June 29, 2009 2:22 PM

Can I just say that, while being really funny, that MGK strip made me really, REALLY want that Grimlock toy?

Bad news: it's not a toy, but rather a bust. Yes, it is a ninety-dollar statue of the upper half of Grimlock. There is a horrible subspecies of nerd that buys these things. You can get busts of the Grey Gargoyle, Puck from Alpha Flight, Zombie Wolverine, or Power Girl and her enormous titties.

Speaking as a nerd, let me just say that I do not get this at all, much in the way that I do not understand variant "collectible" covers on comic books, putting on costumes and going to conventions, or Rob Liefeld in general.

Posted by: mightygodking at June 29, 2009 2:26 PM

OK, I'll give the Pajibans a reason to watch Gale Storm. She was in REVENGE OF THE ZOMBIES (1943).

Posted by: BWeaves at June 29, 2009 2:26 PM

Why is it sales of a musical icon's material always soar when he/she dies? Do people sit around and think, "I know the guy was a hell of a dancer and he made some pretty good music, or so I hear, so I'd probably like 'Thriller' but he's not gonna get my $18.99 until he's on a slab, if I have to wait 25 years."

Posted by: , (the commenter formerly known as bucdaddy) at June 29, 2009 2:34 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=08Zc17YQzdk

The last word in such matters, Mr. Comma.

Posted by: Jay at June 29, 2009 2:49 PM

Um ... anyone heard from figgy since the shit hit the fan?

Posted by: , (the commenter formerly known as bucdaddy) at June 29, 2009 3:01 PM

Yeah, talked to her yesterday in the Pajiba chatroom she masterminded. She also has a blog she's been updating.

In unrelated-to-figgy news, they're saying Billy Mays died of heart disease, not head trauma. Now THAT seems a little more plausible.

Posted by: Snath at June 29, 2009 3:10 PM

I'm here, I'm here!

Click on my name for my blog, I've been writing updates.

Also: How many Hipster Points do I lose for never having watched "Boondock Saints"? And not really wanting to?

Posted by: figgy at June 29, 2009 3:28 PM

Yeah, about five minutes after I wrote that I *facepalm* realized that's what the figblog is for.

Dammit, Pajiba, what the hell did you do to my PC? Page views/typing now sooooo slooooow.

Posted by: , (the commenter formerly known as bucdaddy) at June 29, 2009 3:32 PM

HOLY SHIT!

They actually *made* the Boondock Saints sequel? I remember being really excited for that, like, 5 years ago....when I had friends with bad taste and was easily convinced that what sucked was good.

...but I'll probably see it.

Posted by: Kate at June 29, 2009 4:16 PM

(972): they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!

--textsfromlastnight.com

Posted by: Clitty Magoo at June 29, 2009 4:38 PM

When I first saw that on Facebook, Clitty, I laughed so hard. It's so wrong, but it's so hilarious.

Posted by: Snath at June 29, 2009 4:41 PM

I just watched the Mighty Putty commercial and I'm convinced that you just screwed it up Snath. There is no fucking way that magificant walrus of a man would lie to me.

Maybe you need to knead it like a bresteses rather than pinch it like a nipple. It's got to be about technique.

Posted by: admin at June 29, 2009 6:48 PM

Jeebus. Keep admin away from funbags.

Posted by: figgy at June 29, 2009 7:20 PM

Yay, I contributed!

I haven't seen Boondock Saints either, Figgy.

Posted by: Melissa at June 29, 2009 8:19 PM

I think Vince Schlongi is somehow behind Billy Mays' death. That man and his Slap Chop of Death are pure evil.

Posted by: stardust savant at June 29, 2009 9:26 PM

Add me to the Never-Seen-Boondock-Saints club.
I've had two whose opinions I trust tell me those opinions; one says it's freakin' awesome; the other says it totally sucks, out loud.

I'm so confused.


REST IN PEACE, BILLY MAYS! I MIGHT COULD BE SEEIN' YA IN A MATTER OF DAYS!

Posted by: Rykker at June 29, 2009 9:30 PM

I am an unabashed fangirl of Boondock Saints. I'm not sure if I want this sequel to be so awesome it blows my mind, or so horrible it blows my mind. Just don't let it be mediocre.

Posted by: Cuno at June 29, 2009 9:40 PM

Here is another bit of Billy Mays news to make you sad. He had just signed on to be the pitchman for Taco Bell. Imagine how awesome that would have been!

BILLY MAYS HERE FOR THE NEW FRUITISTA FREEZE FROM TACO BELL!

Sadness.

Posted by: stardust savant at June 29, 2009 10:30 PM

Posted by: mightygodking at June 29, 2009 2:26 PM

IT WAS A BUST?!?!?!! GAAAAGH?!?!! If there is a greater pox on the world of toys than "never-opened or played with" bullshit, it is fucking statues masquerading as toys! It is why I hate MacFarlane Toys with all my heart and soul! Stop teasing me with those beautiful sculpts, you sons of bitches! Give me a damn Navy SEAL figure I can actually rappel down my fucking FRIDGE!!!!!

*ahem*

As for the rest, i agree, except on the costuming part. I used to think that, but I got used to it. And by "got used to it", I mean "this girl I was majorly crushing on went to a con with me and wore this cute and tight Chinese dress number, and my brain melted and I lost all knowledge of English for a few weeks".

Posted by: Vermillion at June 29, 2009 10:48 PM