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Totally Exciting "Grey's" News With A Side of Sarcasm Sauce!

Pajiba Love / Stacey Nosek

Pajiba Love | June 19, 2009 | Comments (61)

Fantabulous news guys! Katherine Heigl is coming back to “Grey’s Anatomy” and it’s looking like Izzie might not be dead after all! O’ joyous day for everyone! (Webster’s)

In other “Grey’s Anatomy” news … If you’re jonesin’ got a “Grey’s” fix over summer hiatus, maybe this “Grey’s Anatomy” Wii game will do the trick. I am not making this up. This actually exists. (Topless Robot)

Admin and Kolby were awesome enough to put together this facebook quiz: “Which Pajiba Personality Are You?” I was “Stacey Nosek,” by the way. It’s like they know me. All you need to play is a facebook account! (facebook)

As if Up wasn’t horrifyingly sad enough on its own, here is a story about how Pixar representatives came to a girl with cancer’s deathbed to privately screen it for her. Warning: This story will make you cry at work. (Celebitchy)

Neve Campbell is throwing a wrench in the plans for a new Scream trilogy. Like what the hell else does Neve Campbell have going on anyway? (Bloody Disgusting)

Buffster news! Details are sketchy, but supposedly there is a new “Buffy” animated series in the works based on the graphic novel series. Yeah, I’ve heard this before. But it sounds more positive than news of the Jossless movie anyway. (TV Overmind)

Oh noes! Robert Pattinson was nearly killed to the death this morning when a group of screaming girls forced him out in front of a moving taxi cab. (Celebslam)

Harold Ramis is talking about the new Ghostbusters movie to anyone who will listen. Oh, and Year One, of course. (AV Club)

This week in Fuck You: People who own “Labradoodles,” the stupidest possible dog combination and dog combination name ever. Seriously, fuck you. (KSK)

With Father’s Day coming this weekend, here’s a list of the best “dad” moments in movies. (Screen Junkies)

Only in Japan would you find a video game based solely on the concept of giving someone the Japanese equivalent of a wedgie. (atom)

What’s everyone’s policy on becoming friends with the S.O.’s ex? Personally, my ex’s ex remains to be one of my bestest friends to this day. Plus, bonus! Now we can talk smack on him, Kidding, kidding … (Jezebel)

With G.I. Joe and Transformers 2 coming out this summer, here are some other possible movie ideas based on your favorite childhood toys:

Toy Movies

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.


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Comments

If Labradoodles and other "hip" mutt mixes make less people buy purebred dogs prone to horrible genetic conditions (hemophilia, hip dysplasia) I'm all for it.

Posted by: twig at June 19, 2009 1:10 PM

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

NO! Just NO! Frakking goddamnit to hell, I THOUGHT I KILLED YOU HEIGL! I checked the goddamned pulse, I disposed of the body, I even did a tasteful tap/interpretive/jazz fusion dance on the fucking grave.

AND NOW YOU TELL ME SHE'S COMING BACK?! That's fucking it...this time, it's personal.

Posted by: DoctorControversy at June 19, 2009 1:20 PM

Apparently I'm like TK. Should I be worried?

That's what I thought.

Posted by: Stella at June 19, 2009 1:22 PM

DAMMIT. WHY CAN'T SHE STAY DEAD.

But...at the same time I'm kind of glad that they're not going the Abby from ER way in never letting Alex be happy, ever. I hate that I care about this at all.

I was TK. It's scary.

Posted by: figgy at June 19, 2009 1:23 PM

I hate it when people combine names. And "Brangelina" continues to be the dumbest name combination ever. Sounds like a poodle Liberace would own.

Posted by: Sofía at June 19, 2009 1:25 PM

I got Skitz, which doesn't surprise me.

Also, I dig that you linked Topless Robot, they're one of my favorite websites. Chock full o' geek goodness.

Posted by: Snath at June 19, 2009 1:27 PM

Who is Seth? And do I have to have my hair done like that because I'm doubting my husband will fuck me if I show up looking like that and I wanted to be like Stacey so fuck your quiz and fuck facebook and ....

boss just walked by....

boss thinks I look like the picture of Seth.

I quit.

Posted by: dawn at June 19, 2009 1:36 PM

I've been helping foster a puppy (long horrible story for his background that I'll spare everyone, since the important part is: obnoxiously happy ending. He's going to his permanent home TODAY). When we came across him, we were told that he was a pure bred chihuahua. It was soon obvious (harder to tell when they're three weeks old and still amorphous puppy blobs) that he wasn't pure bred. As he got bigger, we realized he was a chihuahua/jack russell mix. So what does that make him?

He's a jawa (or, technically, a jahua).

Posted by: Tyburn Blossom at June 19, 2009 1:38 PM

I'm Brian Prisco! Prisco, if you're ever in NYC lets go get drunk and be sarcastic to people.

Posted by: scorzi at June 19, 2009 1:39 PM

Oh man, that Pixar story is too much. I just read the linked OKC Register article which included this:

“Do you think you can hang on?” Colby’s mother said.
“I’m ready (to die), but I’m going to wait for the movie,” the girl replied.

I think that statement easily qualifies Colby for Honorary Pajiban status. Not gonna let some punk-ass disease keep her from seeing that movie! Fuck you, cancer!

Posted by: Kballs at June 19, 2009 1:42 PM

As he got bigger, we realized he was a chihuahua/jack russell mix. So what does that make him?

A tripping hazard.

Posted by: branded at June 19, 2009 1:43 PM

Spam are delicious! I love to meet him at h a l f m e a t . c o m for sexy fun times. Wait, he is me? Does not compute.. does not compute.... Danger! Danger!

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at June 19, 2009 1:47 PM

I have three mutts and I love them to pieces. They're some kind of maltese/havanese/whateverese and they're smart and funny. They're 10 years old and they haven't been sick a day in their lives. So fuck the purebreds. Mutts all the way!

Posted by: figgy at June 19, 2009 1:48 PM

Those Jack Russells can catch wicked air too. I imagine the Jawa is a firestorm of cuteness that needs to live in a house entirely made of rubber for his owners' sake.

Posted by: Jay at June 19, 2009 1:49 PM

I hope you're happy, Stacey. Thanks to you and your Up story, I am not a total weepy bitch.

Posted by: Jeremy Feist at June 19, 2009 1:50 PM

He's a jawa (or, technically, a jahua).

Nice.

We (some friends and I that worked at a pet supply store [no pets, just stuff for them]) use to be amazed at how much money people would pay for a dog that was, in essence, a mutt, and therefore not purebred. We were even more amazed at the people who would come in and say things like, "He's a purebred Jackadoodle". We would all mutter things under our breath like, "You know you're a jackadoodle, right?"

And yet, thousands of dogs sit in shelters...

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at June 19, 2009 1:53 PM

A neighbor in my building has corgi/collie mixes, which are as hilariously cute as you can imagine.

Posted by: Snath at June 19, 2009 1:55 PM

I watched "Dog Whisperer" last night, and they had on a Lab / Daschund mix. All I could do was try to imagine the conception and think, "Ow, Ow, Ow, Ow Ow!"

Posted by: BWeaves at June 19, 2009 1:58 PM

I know it's a joke but I would watch Wes Anderson's Teddy Ruxpin.

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at June 19, 2009 2:02 PM

Apparently I am Prisco as well. Huh. Don't know how I feel about that really....

Posted by: Vermillion at June 19, 2009 2:07 PM

branded: Damn right. I loved the little guy to death, but I'm so glad he's going to someone else's house now.

He's the funniest thing. He's got one ear that stands up like a chihuahua, and one that flops over like a jack russell. He's got a curly chihuahua tail, but definite jack russell markings. Now that he's about 8 weeks old, he's so stocky we're wondering if he might have a little dauchshund in there, too.

He's a hyserical ball of energy, he plays enthusiastically with my kitten, does something we refer to as 'demon puppy' when you flip him over onto his back (he rolls his eyes back, throws his mouth open, flails his tongue around, and tosses his head back and forth while making this fantastic noise that should totally be used as a horror movie sound effect), and he has a vocal range you wouldn't believe. He doesn't howl: he moos. Like, he throws his head back and goes, "Mooooooooooooo!" And he shrieks like a monkey, in addition to whining all the time and barking occasionally.

Yeah, he's cute as hell, but I'm glad his new mom is ready for him now.

Posted by: Tyburn Blossom at June 19, 2009 2:12 PM

Oh, one of my other dogs is a beagle/Irish wolfhound.

I do at least know that the mother was the wolfhound, and the father was an ambitious little bastard.

Posted by: Tyburn Blossom at June 19, 2009 2:15 PM

"I was TK. It's scary. "

HEY! You should wear that like a fucking badge of honor.

I SAID FUCKING WEAR IT, GODDAMNIT!

Posted by: TK at June 19, 2009 2:20 PM

I was Seth too (Dawn, Seth=TV Whore). Between my choosing half Phillies answers and half wine, I was hoping to be labeled as some bizarro Seth/Stacey hybrid.

Behold Stethey Noslich! Watch as I consume an entire box of wine and rant drunkenly about the loss of Brian Dawkins! Behold how gloriously my chest hair offsets the allure of my vintage dress!

Posted by: Julie at June 19, 2009 2:22 PM

FINE! FINE! FINE! THERE! I'm wearing it! fine! see? there ! I'm pinning it to my shirt ARE YOU HAPPY NO---

I WANT TO FUCK YOUR MOM AND EAT SOME MOTHERFUCKING TACOS. SWEATER VESTS AND RAGE.

Posted by: figgy at June 19, 2009 2:28 PM

Behold Stethey Noslich! Watch as I consume an entire box of wine and rant drunkenly about the loss of Brian Dawkins! Behold how gloriously my chest hair offsets the allure of my vintage dress!

Julie, that is a scary, scary mental image.

I ended up as Prisco. I think it might have something to do with the hatred.

Posted by: lizzieborden at June 19, 2009 2:32 PM

I think we can all agree one TK is more than enough for most people.

Posted by: Vermillion at June 19, 2009 2:34 PM

And I think YOU should cram it in your fuckin' cramhole.

Posted by: TK at June 19, 2009 2:35 PM

Thanks Julie, I guess it's not as bad as I thought. The picture was just a little scary but being a Stethey Noslich just sounds like a LOT of work, so I'll leave that to you. You seem like you have lots of energy and I, sadly, am running on fumes today.

Posted by: dawn at June 19, 2009 2:44 PM

While I agree that Labradoodle is a horrible name, those dogs actually serve a purpose. Labrodoodle's are bred to be guide dogs for people who are allergic for dogs. Poodles have hair that for some reason doesn't trigger an allergic reaction, I think it's because they don't shed their hair, or at least a lot less than other dogs do. So with Labradoodles you have the caractertraits that make a good guide dog minus the allergens.

Posted by: Hanneke at June 19, 2009 3:04 PM

I'm a Stacey Nosek! I pretty much knew it when I chose "kitten" as my favorite color.

Posted by: Geetch at June 19, 2009 3:05 PM

Hanneke, thanks for saying that. It's not the dogs we need to be hating on, it's the owners. The non-guide-dog-needing owners, to be more specific. No dog hating, people! It wasn't their idea!

Posted by: Anne (in Reno) at June 19, 2009 3:24 PM

Labradoodles are super cute. The name does make them sound like assholes, but they look like spazzy muppets therefore I want one.

Posted by: Julie at June 19, 2009 3:30 PM

Look, when you mess with a gene pool, you get bad things that co-occur with good things. And we ALWAYS mess with the gene pool of our animals. It only takes a couple of generations of random breeding before all dogs revert to yellowish 40lbs mutts with prick ears. It's not just breeding for looks that causes problems, either. Border Collies have a breed standard that calls for practically *no* cosmetic ideals (it's *all* about working ability and temperament), yet there are diseases in BCs that have a strong genetic component.

So you love your small black dog, or your big fluffy mutt and they both came from the shelter. If everyone stopped breeding purebreds, better get used to loving medium-sized random-bred yellow dogs who ALSO occasionally will show up with hip dysplasia, or progressive retinal atrophy, or liver shunts. But nobody studies the genetics of random-bred dogs because...there's no pedigrees to study.

I've had my share of mutts and sure, I love them. But for consistency, I'll keep breeding my purebreds. I know what to expect. They are appealing to me in looks and personality. I know what kind of genetic time bombs may be waiting for me, and before I breed, I test and study pedigrees to avoid the most likely ones. So far, in the 15 years I've be "in" my breed, I've caused three extra dogs to be born on this planet, and they are all still safe and sound and loved (and spayed and neutered...so they don't pass on the genetic accident they may carry to the next generation). Tell me that kind of thought went into a Labradoodle. Tell me that kind of planning went into a mutt *without* a designer name. I would be very surprised if you could.

I get really tired of people treating purebred dogs as the 90-lb weaklings of the animal world. You will not find a bigger animal lover than a serious, *amateur*, responsible dog breeder. We don't want to create shaking, sick, snappy dogs, we're trying to make our dogs *better*, better able to fit into our lives in one niche or another. I spent another 30 minutes last night talking to a 76-year-old man about what kind of companion would be right for him in his retirement community, a man desperately missing the affection of the strong-willed young Viszla that had simply become too much for him to handle. I have the perfect match for him here in Rescue, a sweet little 12-lb female who would be everything he's looking for in a package he could deal with. But...someone he trusts told him that small purebreds are too "nervous and needy", so he rescinded his adoption application. It makes me sad for him and for Daisy.

I'll climb down off my soapbox now. It's getting worn out because I pull it out every time someone starts in about the natural superiority of the American Mutt. It just ain't so....

Posted by: Wednesday at June 19, 2009 4:01 PM

Good heavens... who brought in the master race?

Wednesday, sometimes people just want a dog the same way they want a child. They want the one that comes to them. And if it's imperfect, or gets sick, or has bad hips, well, that's part of life. Shit happens.

Or maybe they just want a fuckin' dog, not a eugenics project.

Please don't use this as a reason to post another diatribe, though. Please.

Posted by: Skewicide Blonde at June 19, 2009 4:29 PM

People give a shit about different things. This is one of my things. Feel free to dismiss it as "eugenics" and "fucking dogs" if it isn't yours, though.

Posted by: Wednesday at June 19, 2009 4:53 PM

Purebreeding is harmful to dogs, some breeders mate first generation siblings. Mothers with sons, sisters and brothers, it's disgusting. The "reliability" of a breed is not guaranteed either, but good training and care can make a mutt a perfect companion. But, if purebreeds are your thing, check out rescue groups and shelters first to discourage the more unscrupulous breeders out there.
Wednesday, I would recommend watching this to see where the mistrust of purebreeds comes from:
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=44215931

You can add this to list of heartbreaking things on Pajiba today.

Posted by: Agente Provocatrice at June 19, 2009 5:28 PM

And I think YOU should cram it in your fuckin' cramhole.

Posted by: TK at June 19, 2009 2:35 PM
----------------------------------------------

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

*HI-FIVE*

You told him off good, you dirtbag.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at June 19, 2009 5:35 PM

"I get really tired of people treating purebred dogs as the 90-lb weaklings of the animal world. You will not find a bigger animal lover than a serious, *amateur*, responsible dog breeder..."

-------------------------------


As a proud and loving owner of purebreds of more than 15 years I wholeheartedly agree with the above statement.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at June 19, 2009 5:45 PM

I'm Stacey! Do the Pajibians find it strange that randomers are taking over their identities? Anyhoo, yay for boxed wine as a social crutch!

Posted by: sheepeyes at June 19, 2009 5:49 PM

I got TK. Better than your mom, I suppose.

Posted by: Melissa at June 19, 2009 6:10 PM

Spam are delicious! I love to meet him at h a l f m e a t . c o m for sexy fun times. Wait, he is me? Does not compute.. does not compute.... Danger! Danger!

HAHA I actually skimmed right over this cuz I thought it was a real spambot. Nice one, AvB.

Posted by: Melissa at June 19, 2009 6:16 PM

Did you read the linked OC Register article Jeremy? The initial article made me teary but that one made me lose my shit. My roommate laughed at me until I showed him, then we were weepy snotty messes together.

Posted by: Merrissa at June 19, 2009 7:02 PM

I'm Stacy! Yea, I think the kittens option (also 3-legged beagal- awwww) might have tipped me toward that result.

Posted by: dene at June 19, 2009 7:04 PM

I got Stacey, on purpose. I like people to think I'm a nice guy.


Then I slam their fingers in the car door, steal their liquor, eat some ham, holler about the Phillies, (swept by the Jays)make a derogatory statement about women, swoon over Ry-Ry and flame broil an albino.

It's all about balance.

Posted by: admin at June 19, 2009 7:11 PM

I got Stacey, on purpose. I like people to think I'm a nice guy.

"People"? What "people"? Anyone who knows you more than five seconds knows you're the spawn of Satan and Dick Cheney.

Posted by: figgy at June 19, 2009 8:08 PM

Yorkipoo is a WAYYYYYY more annoying name for a mutt. And plus, the yaps make me want to kill them.

Uhh...i mean...close the door. And wear earplugs. Or kill them, whatever.

I pet-sat one last weekend who decided the best course of action was to run circles around my pit bull, continually barking at her while Molly looked on confused and with ears in pain.

Posted by: Kate at June 19, 2009 8:14 PM

I got Skitz. Maybe I should be excited. Or scared.

Mostly I'm just confused.

Posted by: Bistro at June 19, 2009 8:18 PM

I'm Stacey! And I didn't even pick kitten!

Posted by: Kate at June 19, 2009 8:20 PM

Figgy, that hurts. Really, you have cut me down to the bone. I try to be good, I really do! But my nature is such that it won't allow me to be pure. I have been called many things in this life; most of them of a detrimental nature, and deservedly so.

Never have I been compared to that evil, snub-nosed hobgoblin that ran the USA for eight years. I'm afraid that I'm going to have to re-evaluate our freindship.

Good day.

Posted by: admin at June 19, 2009 9:03 PM

Rotwieller and Poodle = Roodle.

The second I heard that was the second I lost all respect for the 'designer dog'. Well, the second after I finished laughing until I hurt myself.

Wednesday> I agree with what you're saying, but I do have a minor quibble with:Tell me that kind of thought went into a Labradoodle.
See, originally, before they became some kind of bullshit fashion statement, just as much, if not MORE thought went into those Labradoodles. They were bred for people who'd been hit with the double whammy of blindness and a dog allergy, and when it takes $20,000 to train a seeing eye dog, you better believe they're going to check it's lineage.
Of course, a lot of people then said 'well, if they're used by the blind, they must be awesome dog! And they have such a cute name!', and the poor animal became an industry, and there's a lot of bastards out there. Still blows my mind though, that the worst offenders are the freaking AMISH. Apparently, the modern Amish is all about loving your neighbour, turning the other cheek, and not bothering to vaccinate those puppies you're selling for $1500 a pop.

Posted by: ScienceGeek at June 19, 2009 9:17 PM

Good Godtopus... I got Brian Prisco. I fucking HATE that. And I hate everyone. And everything! And I hate all of you who adore me and say nice things about me! How DARE you!

Posted by: Spender at June 19, 2009 9:27 PM

I wasn't COMPARING, dearest, just...sayin'...that...um...if two evils got together they'd, um, make you? Though, now that I think about it, Cheney IS the devil so that doesn't quite fit, does it? How about Satan and a Mountie Zombie! Cos you're Canadian and all! fits perfectly!

Or Satan and Celine Dion, take your pick.

No...? I love you! Yes?

Posted by: figgy at June 19, 2009 9:52 PM

No you weren't comparing, figgy, you were making a statement. To think, all of this hate because I wouldn't give you my maple syrup. For shame.

Posted by: admin at June 20, 2009 12:53 AM

I was Prisco too...totally disappointed. I drink probably more boxed wine than Stacey. Had a whole box just last Wednesday night. I call bullshit.

Posted by: Austin asking for trouble at June 20, 2009 1:04 AM

No no no no, you wouldn't just NOT GIVE ME the maple syrup, you had to remove all traces of real maple syrup from Honduras, didn't you? You petty, PETTY man. What did I ever do to you? You Son of Celine Dion! I am NOT taking anything back!

*stomps foot, crosses arms*

Posted by: figgy at June 20, 2009 1:20 AM

People, now you understand how Canada will take over the world. 2012 motherfuckers.

Posted by: admin at June 20, 2009 1:45 AM

Chiweeinerdoodle. My aunt had one of these demon spawned creatures made from parts the Devil had left over from Hitler and the Jonas Brothers.

Chihuahua
Weiner Dog
Poodle

Proof that the devil exists, ya'll

Posted by: Dahlia6 at June 20, 2009 3:09 AM

The problem with purchasing a labradoodle as a non-allergen pet is that they are actually hypoallergenic, meaning there is a reduced chance of an allergic reaction. There is no guarantee that a labradoodle will inherit the poodle coat; many are born with the double coat of a labrador. And though those with a single coat are advertised as "shed free," all dogs shed at least a little. They also still carry dander and people who are allergic to canine saliva are still at risk of a reaction.

My youngest dog is the result of a dachshund and beagle getting busy. She wasn't a designer dog, more like an accident. We call her the "Frankenweenie" because she looks like someone glued long legs on a doxie. Turns out, people around here are now breeding these dogs (doxles) and selling them for several hundred dollars.

The woman who teaches next door to me has Jack Russell/Shizu puppies for sale. You can guess what she calls them. I have to admit that they are disgustingly cute, though.

Posted by: superEdna at June 20, 2009 11:04 AM

i suppose none of you would like a crossbreed between a Pug and a Boston terrier. my granpas dog has pupies like that.

Posted by: Utah Dynamo at June 20, 2009 2:00 PM

I WANT TO FUCK YOUR MOM AND EAT SOME MOTHERFUCKING TACOS. SWEATER VESTS AND RAGE.

Bwah ha ha! I think it's kind of a pity figgy isn't eligible for EE for that little outburst.

Oh, and I'm Seth, appparently. I'm also an emotional mess after reading that Celebitchy link...

Posted by: Shay at June 21, 2009 1:15 PM