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Pajiba Love 06/19/08 | Pajiba - Scathing Reviews for Bitchy People

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Pajiba Love

Steve Guttenberg will kick your ass. Ha ha ha. No seriously, dude is pissed. (Celebslam)

Scientology’s deep dark secret is finally revealed. Spoiler alert: they’re zombies! (WIMB)

Obama reaches out to Philadelphians in a language they understand. (QuizLaw)

When I saw the following headline earlier: “Woman Suing Victoria’s Secret Over Thong Injury”… I thought, “Today” show? I was right! (Celebitchy)

CBS News Chief Foreign Correspondent Lara Logan confirms everything we’ve known and assumed about the state of American news. (Deus Ex Malcontent)

Bookend Academy Award “Best Pictures” go head to head in this new feature. First up? Wings v. No Country for Old Men. (Film Experience)

David Beckham debuts his impressive underpants monkey in NYC. (WIMB) Uh, yeah. Impressively photoshopped, anyway. (Yeeeah!)

On the heels of getting suckered into watching The Lathe of Heaven with the boyfriend, here are some “fun facts” about TV movies. (mental floss)

Equus is coming to Broadway and Harry Potter is concerned over the state of his, uh, ass. (Agent Bedhead)

They say you can’t polish a turd, but Burger King went ahead and debuted a $200 gourmet burger anyway. (Serious Eats)

So this isn’t pop culture, or celebrity, or food, or humor related whatsoever… I just thought it was really flipping cool. (GirlNamedBoo)

I know you all hate this word… But apparently John McCain called his wife a cunt. Yes, a cunt! I cunt even believe it. Cunty McCunt cunt, after the cunt.

Pajiba Love | June 19, 2008 | Comments (30)


Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.


God Told Me To | Crash - Boozehound





Comments

Not all of us Eagles fans are into brawls! I like to take out my frustration from September to January by throwing rocks at old people.

Posted by: Julie at June 19, 2008 3:42 PM

Guttenberg is freaking me out in those pictures. When the hell did he get that muscle? I'm frightened, damn it!

Posted by: Brie at June 19, 2008 3:44 PM

That's what a stint on Dancing With the Stars will do for you, Brie. If B-Slim were here (sniffle) he's be able to regale you with fascinating tales of the day he was first able to do splits across the entire dance floor. Yes, it limbers you up, it surely does.

Posted by: Kolby at June 19, 2008 3:58 PM

Screw Julie, my new lesbian crush is on Lara. Wow. And yeah. And damn.

Posted by: lilianna28 at June 19, 2008 4:00 PM

Oh wow, boo's owl is totally awesome!

Posted by: twig at June 19, 2008 4:02 PM

[sobs]

I'm losing my mojo, aren't I Lilianna?

Posted by: Julie at June 19, 2008 4:05 PM

you're still pretty julie. Plus, we'll always have the last thread back there. Not quite Paris, but it'll do.

Posted by: lilianna28 at June 19, 2008 4:17 PM

He's on Dancing with the Stars? I just thought it was just 'roid rage.

Yeah, where is B-Slim? Has our snarkiness chased him away?

Posted by: Brie at June 19, 2008 4:37 PM

I have to agree with Liliana here. Lara is my new lesbian crush...or is it straight crush? I'm confused. I'm just going to stare at David Beckham's junk. Mmm...photoshop.

Posted by: Jeremy at June 19, 2008 4:52 PM

Am I the only one who thinks those Guttenberg pictures look totally fake? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills.

Posted by: Lannie at June 19, 2008 5:01 PM

No, Lannie, I am with you.

Faked-ity fake fake fake.

Unlike my hooter! Isn't that the coolest thing, like, EVAR?

Posted by: boo at June 19, 2008 5:03 PM

I feel like the Armani ads featuring David Beckham's junk should be accompanied by sound effects. Kinda like a gong but more... Schloooooooooooooooooonggggg

Posted by: jM at June 19, 2008 5:10 PM

Oh, me too, they look so very staged.

Gootie Gootie Gootie...there are so many more effective ways to get attention. Go make High Spirits 2: Tuppin with TuPac.

Posted by: Julie at June 19, 2008 5:15 PM

Unlike my hooter! Isn't that the coolest thing, like, EVAR?

I think we are all aware of how great your hooter is by now. If you are going to continue to rub it in our faces, however, it will soon wear out its welcome. Nobody likes a desperate hooter.

P.S. This place is making me so very wrong in the head...

Posted by: Vermillion at June 19, 2008 5:23 PM

Dammit, that line was supposed to be "Nobody likes a desperate hooter tooter."

Posted by: Vermillion at June 19, 2008 5:24 PM

Vermillion, I thought the same thing when I read hooter. Because it sounds like cooter. And because...I'm me.

Julie, this is neither here nor there, but I thought you'd like to know that (spambot deletions notwithstanding), you just posted Pajiba's 100,000th comment (kinda fitting, too). -- RR

Posted by: Julie at June 19, 2008 5:28 PM

In that picture, Steve Guttenberg looks almost exactly like Michael Lohan.

Posted by: Sarina at June 19, 2008 5:33 PM

Julie, if one were the suspicious sort, one would believe she intentionally said "hooter," knowing it would be misunderstood to mean genitalia.

But why oh why would she do such a thing?

P.S. I just realized....hooter....side bewbage....so much subtext....a true mystery...shall we ever know the true meaning of "hooter"?

P.P.S. Oh, it's an owl.

Posted by: Vermillion at June 19, 2008 5:50 PM

We have been cheated out of our rightful place in comment history. Your petty deletions cannot stop us. We will destroy your world and use your disgusting bodily fluids to lubricate the gears of our machines of destruction.

Please find us at "d i e w o r t h l e s s o r g a n i c s c u m . c o m"

Posted by: Spambot Apocalypse at June 19, 2008 6:11 PM

Vermillion, after jumping right from PissBaby (aka Anti-Christ) talk to Boo's cooter (sorry boo, I read it that way too) you cannot possibly avoid getting mind fucked by this place!

Funny side note... so my parents watched my 2 year old last night and reported back that she has apparently learned the correct application of the words "shit" and "damn"- as in, "shit" after she drops her cookie or "damn" when her blocks fall down. Shit, I don't know whether to be mortified or damn proud.

Posted by: lilianna28 at June 19, 2008 7:41 PM

Awesome owl, boo. That's such an amazing picture!

Now back to giggling like a (drunken) schoolgirl at the hooter and cooter comments...

Posted by: MO at June 19, 2008 8:49 PM

You can polish a turd! Has anyone else seen the "Lloyd's Turd" at the Jorvik Viking Centre in York, England? It's fascinating, well worth the trip.

Posted by: Agente Provocatrice at June 19, 2008 9:15 PM

Yay for Julie for making the 100,000th comment! Boo for Julie for foiling me from getting the milestone comment! I am so torn!

Posted by: Vermillion at June 19, 2008 10:04 PM

know you all hate this word... But apparently John McCain called his wife
Moist?

Posted by: Brian at June 19, 2008 10:44 PM

Bulge or none, David Beckham is one fine piece of man. I live a couple of miles from the Adidas headquarters and drive past it on my way home, and for a couple of months (maybe he signed a sponsorship deal?) they had a picture of him on the side of their building that was at least 30 feet high and 20 feet wide. Everyday I drove past it I said to myself, 'thank you Adidas'.

Posted by: katy at June 20, 2008 12:15 AM

Exactly how long would a hooter have to be rubbed in one's face before its welcome was worn out? Have any of you guys tested this theory?

Posted by: Kris at June 20, 2008 1:24 AM

Ha! That's hysterical Ranylt. I'd like to thank my job for being mind numbingly dull, and my fellow commenters for bringing out my inner pervert.

Posted by: Julie at June 20, 2008 12:12 PM

I don't hate the word cunt - it's my favourite swearie after 'fuck', and it's all olde and stuff. But like all swearies it depends on the intent behind using it, I suppose.

Photoshop? Not necessary. Male underwear models just wrap a slice of bread around their dick to make it look bigger & hide lumps. I assume they take the crust off first. Butter is probably optional. Unless you're in 'Last Tango in Paris'.

Posted by: Tarn at June 20, 2008 2:31 PM

Photoshop? Not necessary. Male underwear models just wrap a slice of bread around their dick to make it look bigger & hide lumps. I assume they take the crust off first. Butter is probably optional.

Tarn, I used to think my grandma made the best sandwiches. Everything I thought I knew was a lie.

Posted by: jM at June 20, 2008 3:28 PM

Q: What's the loudest noise in Pajiba?
A: jM eating sandwiches!!

Posted by: Tarn at June 23, 2008 11:10 AM





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