Pajiba Love 06/05/07 | Pajiba - Scathing Reviews for Bitchy People

Pajiba Love

Get your preorder on — Rilo Kiley’s anticipated fourth album is coming soon! (Pitchfork Media)

Well, this kind of throws some of the Knocked Up “hot chick/average guy” arguments right out the window. (Yeeeah!)

The nerdiest judge’s sentence ever. (QuizLaw)

What does Virtue smell like? If I had to venture a guess — I’d say a combination of Exclamation and Febreze. (Feministing)

In a prime example of the grass always being greener — home office workers actually start to miss the, “So, Peter, what’s happening?” (NY Times)

Audrey Tautou is still adorable. I’m not wild about that blazer, though. (The Evil Beet)

As a graphic arts professional, I wash my hands of this. (YesButNoButYes)

All hail your new savior — Jesus Shark. (Junkiness)

After the jump, spiders on crack. No, really.

Pajiba Love | June 5, 2007 | Comments (20)

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Comments

Rilo Kiley Rilo Kiley Rilo Kiley Rilo Kiley Rilo Kiley Rilo Kiley!!!!!

Wheeee!

The coolest Olympic bid graphic was still Cape Town's from 2004. Check it out:

http://www.aldaver.com/Images/Osb/04/lg2004b1.gif

Seriously, how cool is that?

Audrey Tatou could were a burlap sack and still look darling.

Rilo Kiley!

Wheeee!

Posted by: TK at June 5, 2007 3:46 PM

And by "were a burlap sack", I of course meant "wear".

CRAP!

Posted by: TK at June 5, 2007 3:49 PM

Yaaaay, Rilo Kiley!

But seriously, does Heigl look bad at all? I think she looks like an attractive woman in a natural state.

And just for the record, I'm sick of people talking about what a "real" body she's got. She's still freaking skinny. Maybe not emaciated like other ho'woodlets, but still trim and nicely curvey.

That is in no way an endorsement of the arguments about whether seth rogan would actually get her, though. I think he's adorable, first, and also, just, whatever.

Posted by: Jen at June 5, 2007 3:54 PM

I can't fault Heigl, my eyelashes are damn near invisible when I wake up, and mascara does make a HUGE difference. And she looks a lot prettier when she smiles too, which she's not doing in the photo.

One of the Feministing ladies is going to be on the Colbert Report tonight! The link reminded me. Woo!

Posted by: Genny at June 5, 2007 4:13 PM

it's actually audrey tautou.

love, your friendly neighborhood nit-picker

I blame The Beet!!! - LS

Posted by: carissa at June 5, 2007 4:15 PM

Jen, I'm compelled to respectfully disagree with you. I'm not even convinced that's Katherine Heigl, but whoever it is looks like Charlize Theron in "Monster." Gack.

Bwuh, "Lisa Simpson giving head" -- hee hee, that's what it looks like all right, but now I'm seriously damaged from the idea of Lisa Simpson giving head. That's like hearing about my own sister or something.

Posted by: socalledonlycousins at June 5, 2007 4:20 PM

Buuuh-huh-huh-huh-huh, I'm sorry, those Heigl pics creep me out even more after scrolling through them. It looks like the Theronator standing outside a bus station waiting to get picked up by her next victim. Maybe it's the cigarettes. Maybe it's that she looks splotchy like Charlize did in the film.

I know, I know, I'm the epitome of all that is disempowering and undermining of women. Guh, ack!

Posted by: socalledonlycousins at June 5, 2007 4:27 PM

Heigl looks fine. I am so sick of this cultural bandwagon where we all make fun of women without makeup, and I'm disappointed in Pajiba for perpetuating it. Maybe y'all need to pick up an old copy of The Beauty Myth.

Posted by: Lilly at June 5, 2007 4:55 PM

Salty, I owe you for posting that fake Hinterland Who's Who. That was the laugh I needed after a bad day.

(Tip: Canadians who grew up on those short tv vignettes will probably appreciate the parodic elements more than most...)

Posted by: Ranylt at June 5, 2007 5:25 PM

I won't even let my fiance walk out of the house unless she's wearing an incredibly uncomfortable pair of thong underwear, two coats of makeup, and a Wonderbra. Heigl seriously needs to step up her game if she wants to attract my attention.

I thought big stars had assistants that would keep them from looking like a bag of hammered bat dung.....

Posted by: Manny at June 5, 2007 5:26 PM

The only thing particularly unattractive about that picture of Katharine Heigl is that she's smoking.

Posted by: Squarah at June 5, 2007 7:54 PM

Katherine looks normal. You could only throw that "hot chick/average guy" argument out the window if you also had a picture of Seth looking unusually attractive.

Posted by: Ann at June 5, 2007 9:06 PM

I think the citizens of England need to make the graphic designer of that gawd-awful logo into the Crack Spider's bitch.

Katherine Hiegl doesn't look that bad in those photos. She mostly looks like she hasn't slept in days, besides the fact that she needs some mascara and a smile. At least I know I look like death warmed over (death with exceptionally good bone structure, mind you) without any concealer under my eyes and no mascara, but I at least wear concealer and mascara when I leave the house, even if I'm going to the corner store where I am in danger of being seriously over-dressed by the very fact that my clothes are clean.

Posted by: stardust savant at June 5, 2007 9:28 PM

That spiders-on-drugs video was hilarious. And I was so buying it until the restraining order part.

Just wanted to point out that the Promicin ads are now officially freaking me out with this lady saying how she can give you multiple orgasms by touch or whatever.

Posted by: Vermillion at June 5, 2007 9:36 PM

Why are we worrying about Katherin Heigl's obviously quick run to the corner store for more cigarettes when we should all be protesting against the Canadian government for hooking spiders on drugs! Save the Crack Spider's Bitch!

Posted by: A Marine's Wife at June 6, 2007 12:20 AM

I know what you mean about the Promicin ads, Vermillion. I mean, how do you have 72 orgasms in an hour? Why not just say "an hour-long orgasm"?

More importantly, is this season going to have an episode featuring Orgasm Touch Lady? 'Cause I'll definitely want to set my VCR.

Posted by: Jerce at June 6, 2007 12:55 AM

Although I'm not feeling the blazer either, I do have shameless love for Audrey Tautou. She was amazing in Amelie. Personally, she always put me in the mind of Audrey Hepburn more than Natalie Portman ever has.

Posted by: Brie at June 6, 2007 1:02 AM

LOL - Save the crack spider's bitch! needs to be a t-shirt.

Caffeine spider--that's exactly how I feel inside when I've had too much. Freaking hilarious.

Posted by: Ranylt at June 6, 2007 8:10 AM

Newsflash: Women look better with makeup on. Women look different with makeup on. Even movie stars and models. You've pretty much got to have the goods in the first place, but "hot" is partly a function of clothes/hair/makeup.

Posted by: Samantha T at June 6, 2007 11:15 AM

A much better Jesus Shark post from a week ago...

Posted by: nyoprinces at June 6, 2007 12:22 PM