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Pajiba Love

OH. EM. GEE. The only thing more adorable than a big Rainn Wilson is a little Rainn Wilson. (VideoGum)

Scarlett Johansson tells Woody Allen to suck it. (WIMB)

And, the deluded bitch still thinks she can sing! (Popoholic)

Uhmm… Since we’ve already gotten shut down by the Department of Homeland Security once, I neither endorse nor recommend this link. (Deus Ex Malcontent)

New microwave pizzas scientifically designed to make you not feel bad about eating microwave pizza alone. (The Impulsive Buy)

El Chupacabra gets his application for immigration to the U.S. denied. (Lucas Membrane)

Wha? I don’t know who Freema Agyeman is, but Socalled seems to think you guys would enjoy this interview with her. If not, there’s a link to a Jerry Springer interview on the same page. Yay, Springer! (A.V. Club)

A complete pro/con rundown of potential Obama running mates from John Edwards to Optimus Prime to a giant sundae. (MightyGodKing)

Shiloh Jolie-Pitt quite possibly the most beautiful child in the history of children. (Celebitchy)

Oh, come on. Toys don’t make anyone gay… Let’s face it, if you were a pre-adolescent boy playing with a My Buddy doll, you were probably already well on your way there. (cityrag)

What should the office vending machine stock more of: Pepsi or water? Passive aggressive note-off… GO! (PA Notes)

By popular demand, “Fuck It: The O’Reilly Remix,” after the jump!

Pajiba Love | May 19, 2008 | Comments (25)

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.


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Comments

Holy LORD was Rainn Wilson too cute for words.

You want ugly glasses? See my fifth grade picture. Huge pink plastic frams. Braces. Terrible bangs. My college girlfriends loved this picture so much that they enlarged it, superimposed it on a donkey, and hung it outside my dorm room for my 20th birthday so we could all play "Pin the Tail on the Julie."

Posted by: Julie at May 19, 2008 3:51 PM

Scarlett Johanssen has been picking at my nerves for years, but I never thought she would go this far. Tom Waits is my favorite artist ever in life.
I listened to her whole album yesterday, and all I can say is that if we ever cross paths, I am going to hit her over the head with a broken Johnnie Walker bottle, hold her down, and hit her head off the concrete repeatedly to the beat of "Sixteen Shells from a 30.06" While smoking a Pall Mall.

Posted by: Courtie at May 19, 2008 3:56 PM

room for my 20th birthday so we could all play "Pin the Tail on the Julie."

Dammit, I can't come up with any filthy jokes! I am totally blanking! Arrrrggghhh!

New bumper sticker - Obama/Prime '08: Because he is a giant fucking robot, that's WHY.

Posted by: Vermillion at May 19, 2008 4:28 PM

Oh, dear. This is a bit of a dilemma that must be puzzled out. On the one hand, I kind of hate Scarlett Johansson, not necessarily just because she's useless, but because she's so smug about it. On the other hand, I've not been subject to her little musical endeavour, and I goddamn hate Woody Allen a million times more than I hate Scarlett Johansson. Therefore, even though she's an uppity, talentless cow...she wins.

Posted by: Sarina at May 19, 2008 4:31 PM

Vermillion, you disappoint me :(

Posted by: Julie at May 19, 2008 4:33 PM

Freema Agyeman played Martha, the Doctor's Companion, on series 3 of Doctor Who. The current companion is Catherine Tate.

Posted by: minorblue at May 19, 2008 4:35 PM

Not trying to be an asshole here, but I'm tired of these movie posters all looking the same. They did it w/ 40 Year Old Virgin, Knocked Up, and now this. Not that Rainn Wilson doesn't look adorable, but this marketing feels lazy now.

Posted by: Brie at May 19, 2008 4:37 PM

Isn't it obvious: "Pin Julie in the tail"?

Posted by: Brigette at May 19, 2008 4:41 PM

The very gorgeous Freema Agyeman. Purrowr. Also possibly up for the female lead in Torchwood for season three, if you listen to the hype. (After all, according to them, Cap'n Jack's gonna be replaced by Martha and Mickey, and Captain John's coming back too.)

Rainn Wilson reminds me very much of Michael C. Hall in Dexter there.

Posted by: Mara at May 19, 2008 4:41 PM

All the Jolie-Pitt kids are ridiculously pretty and I'm betting the twins currently gestating in Angelina's womb are already far more attractive than I am or ever will be. That family makes my uterus ache.

And my, uh, adopting lobe, um, quiver? I just know I want babies like theirs.

Posted by: Genny (also Rusty) at May 19, 2008 4:42 PM

I think the Jolie-Pitt kids are all ridiculously gorgeous, especially Zahara. And I want to bit Shiloh's cheekies. I don't care how scary that makes me sound.

Posted by: Kolby at May 19, 2008 4:48 PM

That's what Woody gets for ascribing non-existent qualities to a muse merely because he's hot for her.

As for Shiloh, she's a little dolly. So adorable. I don't like ranking babies' appearance, though - it feels weird. We're all God's children, people!

Posted by: samantha t at May 19, 2008 4:59 PM

I never had a My Buddy doll, BUT as a young gayling I did insist that my mother buy me a Pizzazz doll from Jem and the Holograms. Denial forced all of us to call it an action figure... but it was a doll.

Years later, when I stormed out of the closet to the "shock" of everyone, I dug it out of a bin in the attic, brought it to the kitchen table, sat down with my family, and said, "Remember Pizzazz?"

Posted by: David at May 19, 2008 5:20 PM

Mara

What is this about Captain Jack not being around for season 3 of Torchwood?!? That's not okay with me and, surely, it is my opinion that matters.

Also, I have naughty, naughty dreams about Capt. Jack Harkness. A lot. Mrrowr, indeed.

Posted by: Sharon at May 19, 2008 6:12 PM

What about if an aunt gives you a My Buddy and it collects dust?

She was never cheap on gifts, quite the opposite, but you never got something you actually wanted, except the one time we all exchanged little lists about eight years ago. I wanted the "Return of the Jedi" soundtrack for my 9th birthday and I got the 12" storybook records of "Jedi" and "Temple of Doom". I did like those...but I still wanted the damn score. My uncle covered that for me at Christmas, along with this audio tape he found at WaldenBooks of David Lynch being interviewed with Frank Herbert about "Dune" for about an hour. It eventually got broken by a dog or my little brother, I can't remember which, but I was steamed.

But who didn't have Underoos? You can't count that. Then again, I don't remember having any dance parties with other boys to show them off.

Oh and yeah....Freema. I like the woman, I like her character, but I also like seeing her wearing jeans.

Posted by: Jay at May 19, 2008 6:30 PM

Oh and yeah....Freema. I like the woman, I like her character, but I also like seeing her wearing jeans.

The tops don't hurt, either.

Screw it, the woman is sexy as hell. And the accent is icing. I don't remember her ever wearing glasses, but I haven't seen Torchwood yet, and I may have blacked out if she did on Who. I am kinda scared to watch her Torchwood eps, since I hear there trends to be quite a bit of same-sex smooching, and certain body parts may explode3 if she was involved.

Sorry, Alex, I am a slut for hot women with accents. I hope you don't think less of me, well, if you could, really.

Posted by: Vermillion at May 19, 2008 6:48 PM

I'm still going with either Suri Cruise or Violet Affleck for most adorable celebrity kid. They are too freakin' cute for words.

Posted by: Geetch at May 19, 2008 7:21 PM

Oh my God, David, Jem and the Holograms? You are my new bestest friend! *Hugs!* Truly, truly outrageous, but nothing beats my Sailor Moon wand thingy my parents got me for my fifth birthday! Or more accurately, my mom got it for me, my Dad just sat on the sofa drinking bitterly...

Posted by: Jeremy at May 19, 2008 9:09 PM

I had every Jem doll -- all the Holograms and the Misfits.
Remember they came with tapes?

Posted by: Courtie at May 19, 2008 10:28 PM

I'm with you Geetch. Violet Affleck is adorable.

Posted by: general rhubarb at May 19, 2008 11:33 PM

Pizzazz? Seriously? With the bad green hair and the unfortunate fondness for animal prints? That's no kind of doll for a 'young gayling'! That should've been Jetta all the way. Forget the dorkiness of playing a saxophone in a rock band. Who can resist the idea of Joan Collins joining a cluster of cartoon rock bitches?

Posted by: Kris at May 20, 2008 1:19 AM

They cannot possibly be considering replacing Jack on Torchwood. I'm a straight man and he is still about 85% of the reason I watch that show. Getting rid of him would be sheer insanity.

Posted by: Todd at May 20, 2008 9:35 AM

I love the el chupacabra piece. Who knew the chupacabra speaks like a lolcat?

Posted by: Cait at May 20, 2008 9:55 AM

Kris,

I know what you're saying about Jetta. BUT...

Young gaylings play back-up to NO ONE.


Jeremy,

We can be best friends, but I get to play Pizzazz at sleep overs.

Posted by: David at May 20, 2008 9:59 AM

Thanks for the Freema Agyeman interview. Any Dr. Who or Torchwood news is appreciated.

Posted by: BWeaves at May 20, 2008 11:02 AM





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