free counter with statistics Pajiba Love 05/08/09 | Pajiba - Scathing Reviews for Bitchy People

gooniessloth.jpg
Will There Be A Goonies Sequel? Spoiler Alert: No.

Pajiba Love / Stacey Nosek

Pajiba Love | May 8, 2009 | Comments (38)

I totally missed this, but back in March the cast of The Goonies reunited and a few were talking sequel. Guess what? That’s never going to happen. Not with these weird looking old dudes, anyway. (ScreenCrave)

If you’re like me and have avoided all things Star Trek your entire life but auspiciously kind of want to see the movie coming out today, here is a complete movie watcher’s guide to catch you up. (Film School Rejects)

Lindsay Lohan’s 15-year-old sister doesn’t go to school because her mother says it’s hard for her being “in the business.” What business is that, exactly? (Webster’s)

Here’s a primer to Star Trek food and drink, so you know what to serve at your Star Trek parties this weekend. (Serious Eats)

Gwyneth Paltrow apparently doesn’t even write her own GOOP. And here I didn’t think there was any way GOOP could possibly be any lamer. (Agent Bedhead)

This had got to be the most unintentionally hilarious trailer of … Well, ever. Let’s just say if Tobias from “Arrested” had a brother and they were both hot Brazilian dudes, it might have gone something like this. (Film Drunk)

Hooray! Jim Jarmusch interview! (AV Club)

I just had to link this just because the caption totally made me snerk. (Look At This Fucking Hipster)

Oh, sadness pie. Mickey Carroll, the last surviving Munchkin from The Wizard of Oz, has passed away. (Jezebel)

This story comes from Star and is almost definitely fake, but even the thought of Vince Vaughn being a total mama’s boy is too good to pass up. (Celebitchy)

Oh noes! Daisy de la Hoya possibly overdosed last night. Although I’m sure VH1 can swap the Folgers and find a reasonably sufficient plastic crackwhore replacement for “Daisy of Love 2.” (DListed)

I’ve thought Megan McCain was an idiot in the past … And, you know, I guess she kind of is. But I have to give her props for calling bullshit on this abstinence-only crappola. (Zelda Lily)

Anyone catch “Idol” the other night? The age old question of what “Britney Spears would look like if she were a twice-divorced 56-year old brunette with cerebral palsy” has finally been answered. (Yeeeah!)

Here is a cute/creepy video by Chris Ware for This American Life Live, about Quimby the Mouse and his friend the disembodied head:

Quimby The Mouse from This American Life on Vimeo.

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.


← The Best Sophomore Directors in Hollywood | "Scrubs" Season Eight Finale, Quasi-Review and Seriously Random List →



Comments

Spoiler alert: THANK FUCKING GOD.

F bomb Fridays, ya'll!!!

Posted by: boo at May 8, 2009 1:02 PM

While that isn't the greatest picture of the cast of Goonies, based on what I can tell Andy Charmichael's still got it!

Hah, hah, you suck, Troy!

Posted by: Forbiddendonut at May 8, 2009 1:06 PM

Also, Josh Brolin is man-hot.

Posted by: boo at May 8, 2009 1:06 PM

Sweet Deep Fried Moses, Kerri Green is a fox.

They should make a sequel and just have ninety minutes of Andy Carmichael writhing around nekkid on a futon.

Posted by: Skitz at May 8, 2009 1:07 PM

RE: Film Drunk link

Soooo you're not contractually obligated to read the site you work for huh? I liked Dustin's picture of the Jonas Bros for the headliner better; it insinuates what many of us assume.

Posted by: Kayanne at May 8, 2009 1:08 PM

I'm really bummed about the dead munchkin. And Farrah.

Posted by: Cindy at May 8, 2009 1:08 PM

Is that bald guy in the front right Chunk? Who the fuck is that?!

Posted by: Kballs at May 8, 2009 1:08 PM

Also, Josh Brolin is man-hot.

Posted by: boo at May 8, 2009 1:06 PM

Uh, shouldn't that be: "Also, Josh Fucking Brolin is fucking man-hot"?

You know, in honor of "F bomb Fridays" and all?

Posted by: Forbiddendonut at May 8, 2009 1:09 PM

The family business of looking like a hag and being a fame whore (and a regular whore) at 15, of course. She learned sooo well from her mom and sister!

Posted by: figgy at May 8, 2009 1:11 PM

Aw, man. Sean Astin is still so fucking adorable.

Posted by: figgy at May 8, 2009 1:13 PM

I know what to serve at a Star Trek party:
NERDS!!!!!!
What's that? Oh, no thank you, I'll show myself out.

Posted by: Kballs at May 8, 2009 1:18 PM

I think we can safely say that Andy Carmichael has only gotten hotter.

Posted by: TK at May 8, 2009 1:21 PM

Speaking of Britney Spears, in the main hospital lobby there is one of the those automatic playing piano things. What was it playing when I went through 20 minutes ago? "Oops I did it again" by Britney. On a piano with no words.

Have I mentioned that I hate today? I need to go beat the crap out of the punching bag.

Posted by: Melody at May 8, 2009 1:24 PM

I'll admit it: I'm excited about the new Star Trek movie. In fact, I'll throw my nerd card down right now. I was even invited to a Star Trek themed birthday party this weekend, but had to send regrets 'cause I'd already RSVP'd to a D&D get together. And I'm devestated I can't do both. No, I'm not ashamed. Though I will be in the corner, making awkward conversation with the fake plastic tree, if anyone needs me.

Posted by: CinnbarriGirl at May 8, 2009 1:40 PM

@CinnbarriGirl - If I wasn't already married, we'd probably have to start dating. You GO with your nerd self, girl.

Posted by: Green Lantern at May 8, 2009 1:57 PM

If you’re like me and have avoided all things Star Trek your entire life but auspiciously kind of want to see the movie coming out today

That's exactly how I feel about the new Star Trek flick right now. I mean yeah, I'm still a little skeptical, but still, I have to admit a morbid curiosity for it.

And F-Bomb Friday? Fuck yeah, boo, I owe you a hug.

Posted by: Jeremy Feist at May 8, 2009 2:02 PM

The bald dude is indeed Chunk. He (well, Jeff Cohen) is an entertainment law attorney in Los Angeles. I went to junior high, high school and college with him. Great guy, great sense of humor, smart as hell. Believe he went to Harvard Law. Nobody ever gave him any truffle shuffle bullshit in school, iirc.

Posted by: icecreammang at May 8, 2009 2:17 PM

Dear Forbiddendonut & TK:

The MurderTank is heading toward your location as I type this (Minimus is steering). I've stocked the bar, the ice machine is full and the whisky fountain has been santized and cleaned for Summer. I propose we kidnap Andy Carm... er, Ms. Green and convince her to go-go dance in the MurderLounge. Please be fed and ready at the end of your driveways.

Thank you in advance for your commitment to this mission,
Skittimus Maximus Esquire III,
Skittimus Minnimus

Posted by: Skitz at May 8, 2009 2:36 PM

What, nothing for Plimpton?

Schmucks.

Posted by: Jay at May 8, 2009 2:38 PM

Wow, that Paula Abdul song completely ripped off Robert Palmer.

Posted by: snapnhiss at May 8, 2009 2:53 PM

Haha, Jay, I was just going to post that I've never seen Martha Plimpton looking so lovely. You just beat me to it.

Posted by: Melissa at May 8, 2009 3:09 PM

Skitz:

I'm ready. Let's do this.

Down here, it's our time. It's our time down here.

Posted by: Forbiddendonut at May 8, 2009 3:49 PM

Yeah, but you know what? This one, this one right here? This was my dream, my wish. And it didn’t come true. So I’m taking it back.

I’m taking them all back.

Posted by: TK at May 8, 2009 4:16 PM

wait, spock is in star trek? who is is star wars? which one is this?

Posted by: gp at May 8, 2009 4:29 PM

*in*


bah, figure it out.

Posted by: gp at May 8, 2009 4:30 PM

CinnbarriGirl, I believe I have, at long last, found my soul mate. I would totally turn for you, you fabulous Nerdlingette.

Speaking of Star Trek food, the Star Trek Experience in Vegas sells 4-packs of Romulan Ale. Of course, my friends and I bought some. Turns out, it's dark blue beer that smells like skunk spray, has a flavor to match, and dyes your bodily-fluids the color of cornflowers. A friend of mine sneezed mid-sip, and his snot came out midnight blue. Later, he would tell us his pee was a similar hue.

So yeah, I think I'll be trying the rum/blue curacao concoction instead next time.

Also, my work buddies and I are totally seeing the movie immediately after we get off today. *nerd squee!*

And Jay, was it in 200 Cigarettes where Martha Plimpton played the die-hard Elvis Costello fan? I remember an interview at about that time where she said he was her favorite musician of all time. So now, you two are connected in my head.

Posted by: shinykate at May 8, 2009 4:49 PM

Meghan McCain is a drooling moron. She says "It's not the GOP's business what I do with my body" ONE SENTENCE before contradicting herself with "Of course, I'm pro-life". DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT PHRASE MEANS, YOU 'TARD?

I think she's just pretending to be a Republican so she won't get cut out of that sweet beer distribution cash.

Posted by: Sarah at May 8, 2009 4:51 PM

Soooo you're not contractually obligated to read the site you work for huh?

Actually Kayanne, I did Pajiba Love ahead of time because it's my boyfriend's birthday and I've been away from the comp all day. Thus, the discrepancy. Now don't you feel like a huge jerk?

Posted by: Stacey at May 8, 2009 4:58 PM

When I was growing up, Sloth made me feel warm in my pants. Is that not normal?

Posted by: PseudoPhed at May 8, 2009 5:21 PM

was it in 200 Cigarettes where Martha Plimpton played the die-hard Elvis Costello fan?

Yes, though I believe it was Garafalo that wakes up with him.

Posted by: Jay at May 8, 2009 5:37 PM

And he was in New York that night, it's historically accurate.

Posted by: Jay at May 8, 2009 5:37 PM

Jesus Christ, she's McCain's daughter? My god, she's hot, funny, talented, smart, and provides a shiny beacon of hope for the Republicans.

There's hope for them yet, McCain's lucky if that's his daughter.

Posted by: George at May 8, 2009 5:55 PM

Green Lantern, shinykate, its good to know there's a place where I can fly my nerd flag high.

Posted by: CinnabarriGirl at May 8, 2009 6:52 PM

Thus, the discrepancy. Now don't you feel like a huge jerk?

*sniffles* You're right. I finally feel like a true blue Pajiban. *shrugs* Anyway, happy birthday to your BF! Hopefully it's a good enough birthday that you won't be at the computer till... Oh, about Monday.

Posted by: Kayanne at May 8, 2009 9:02 PM

They showed that little mouse dude cartoon on the big screen for This American Life. It was such a nice evening. Did any other Pajibos attends?

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at May 9, 2009 11:22 AM

Here’s a primer to Star Trek food and drink, so you know what to serve at your Star Trek parties this weekend.
---
French-fried tribble, mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Posted by: , (the commenter formerly known as bucdaddy) at May 9, 2009 11:36 AM

*crickets*

Posted by: , (the commenter formerly known as bucdaddy) at May 9, 2009 8:21 PM

Meghan McCain is a drooling moron. She says "It's not the GOP's business what I do with my body" ONE SENTENCE before contradicting herself with "Of course, I'm pro-life". DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT PHRASE MEANS, YOU 'TARD?

To be fair, I didn't think she was saying it wasn't their business. She said it wasn't the media's business, which is true. And she said the GOP is unrealistic in its portrayal of women as chaste, unsexual beings. But if I had to paraphrase her point of view, it would be more along the lines of, "I believe if you do get pregnant, you are morally bound to deal with the consequence by keeping that pregnancy alive...which is why I think we need more comprehensive sex education to prevent those situations."

Sorry, keep in mind I'm only playing devil's advocate here. I'm completely pro-choice and am constantly screaming about the hypocrisy of pro-lifers like you mentioned, and I don't think it's ANYONE'S business what I do with my down-there parts. But I thought she made some reasonable points--a more realistic middle ground, if you will.

Posted by: Pistachio at May 10, 2009 11:48 PM