free counter with statistics Pajiba Love 04/25/08 | Scathing Reviews for Bitchy People

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Litely Salted’s Pajiba Love

Back in the days when I was the only person I even knew who appreciated “Freaks and Geeks,” I never thought I’d see the day that Judd Apatow became big enough to be the subject of ridicule. Yet, for better or worse, here we are. (Cracked)

Madonna’s new album for free on the internet? It must be good! (WIMB)

Strawberry Milkshake Oreo Cookies are supposedly less gross than they sound, although the vagina euphemism kind of turned me off of them, I think. (The Impulsive Buy)

It always makes me happy when I see Jennifer Tilly getting some love. I mean, holy freaking shit: can you even believe she’s almost 50? (IDLYITW)

Which is more believable: Hillary’s gay love scandal or Obama’s marriage explodes? To be fair, we’d have to throw in something about McCain and a prostitute. (QuizLaw)

Oh. Good. Lord. Tom Cruise back on Oprah? Do. Not. Want. (Yeeeah!)

What better role model to be adapted to a children’s cartoon than a killing machine with post traumatic stress disorder and disdain for authority? (mental floss)

My favorite hot little nugget Michael Cera does the Michael Showalter Showalter. (Comedy Central Insider)

Hee. “Danson With the Stars.” I would totally watch that! (Slowly Going Bald)

After the jump: In the fight between Batman and Luke Skywalker, there are no winners … Just a couple of losers. (H/T, Galley Slaves!)

Pajiba Love | April 25, 2008 | Comments (27)

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.


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Comments

Tom Cruise is such a freakazoid. Sigh. I used to love him.

Apatow fan or not, that article is funny. And I admit, I loved what they did to the Juno script.

Posted by: Brie at April 25, 2008 3:48 PM

Jennifer Tilly is Still Hot

Someone was needing to be told this? This is news?!?! Way to scoop, IDLYITW!

You know perfectly well that's not Luke Skywalker. Hell, that's probably just some random knight from the temple.

Okay, maybe you don't know that. But Luke never wore that.

Of COURSE I watched the Rambo show on weekday mornings. There's an indelible image in my mind of shots from the back of him lacing up and tying on his headband. Can't remember any of the plots though. And of course I also watched The T, and without it we'd never have been giften "Mr. T Needs Work".

(obviously that's Hillary's Cylon adviser)

Posted by: Jay at April 25, 2008 4:05 PM

Jay, being that you had to correct me on the hyphen placement of Spider-Man, do you really think I know the difference between a dude dressed up as Luke Skywalker and a dude dressed as a random jedi person? Come on!

Posted by: Stacey at April 25, 2008 4:22 PM

Shhh, Jay, 'Bama doesn't know about the... thing, that you said, at the end of your post. That may or may not be considered a spoiler of any kind. Um, shiny things, over there!

Frankly, as someone who's looking to work in the music industry and knows a lot about how it works; good for Madonna. I mean, she's riding Radiohead's coattails on this one, but I applaud the sentiment behind the release if not the content of the album.

Jennifer Tilly is older than my mom but younger than my dad, and looks fan-freaking-tastic. Good for her.

Posted by: Genny (also Rusty) at April 25, 2008 4:24 PM

If I had a bag of weed and Paul Rudd's phone number, I bet I could figure out something more fun to do than rip off the Apatow formula...

Posted by: MG at April 25, 2008 4:26 PM

Jennifer Tilly has such amazing boobies, I hope mine look that good when I'm nearing 50.

Posted by: Julie at April 25, 2008 4:27 PM

Stacey, it's super easy to tell them apart. A regular Jedi will usually look vaguely meditative, whereas a Skywalker of any generation will look wooden, confused, and passive aggressive. They will also have HORRIBLE hair.

Posted by: Sarina at April 25, 2008 4:28 PM

I didn't know where the review of the oreos was going until I hit the photo. Bwa-hahahahahahaha. I have a gyno exam next week. I'm not sure I'll be able to get through it with a straight face, now.

Posted by: BWeaves at April 25, 2008 4:31 PM

Genny (aka Rusty):

I prefer the other interpretation. Madonna Ciccone is a washed up hack. No-one will buy this album so it's a good cover to offer it for free. She can wear all the desperate attention-getting kabbalah pieces of string she wants, they don't make her relevant. She needs to shut up about how to raise children (so does Gwynneth Paltrow) and she needs to accept she's over 40 and do it with some dignity.

Posted by: PaddyDog at April 25, 2008 4:33 PM

Hell yes Jennifer Tilly's still hot! Man, I would be rolling all over that given half the chance! Sheeeit...I'd have to be held down to prevent me from dry-humping her leg if I eve saw her in person...

...ahem...

I mean...yeah, I guess she's doing okay.

Sad to say...I used to watch the Mr.T cartoon. Oh, it was so gloriously bad. Horrifically horribly bad. Cartoon Network recently showed some of those older shows, and I got a chance to see with my nonstupid adult eyes. I wanted to reach inside of me, yank out that inner child o' mine, and slap him the entire length of the show. And then tell him to go home, because I'm ashamed to even know him. It was worse than Care Bears!*

*Disclaimer: Fuck that! Care Bears sucked!

Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at April 25, 2008 4:36 PM

Care Bears had nothin on Rainbow Brite


nothin I tell you!

Posted by: Bethy at April 25, 2008 4:38 PM

Perfectly true, Stacey, but I bear no ill will of course.

Oh and "Jedi"'s capitalized.

Kidding! Kidding!

(I mean, it is, but I'm not scolding you)

Besides, you put in Jennifer Tilly. I'm not even a "breast man" but...she's pretty. But I'm really disappointed that those people are surprised if they pride themselves on keeping up on these things.

Yeah, strawberry "cookie".....I mean, I'm not all gyno-squeamish but.......yeah.

What? Oh, I was in a fugue when I was typing earlier, Rusty, I don't even know what crazy shit I was writing. Nothin to see here.

Okay, I'm gonna lie down and watch "The Magic Sword" for a while until everyone's all relaxed and refractory again (underrated 4th season episode and Basil Rathbon's in the house! David Letterman used a clip as the "Order of the Phoenix" clip when Emma Watson was on last year).

Posted by: Jay at April 25, 2008 4:40 PM

Someone was needing to be told this? This is news?!?! Way to scoop, IDLYITW!

Seriously. Saying Jen Tilly is still ridiculously hot is like "reporting" that oxygen is still needed for human life to continue. She inspires thoughts of debauchery that would make even Julie go cyber-celibate for a while.

and she needs to accept she's over 40 and do it with some dignity.

Like say, Jennifer Tilly?

I am sorry, but after seeing all that fine-ass grown woman, my higher brain functions aren't in control anymore.

Nom-nom-nom.

Posted by: Vermillion at April 25, 2008 4:44 PM

Jennifer Tilly is still smokin', but the voice - god, it grates. I literally can't watch her in anything because she makes me want to puncture my own eardrums.

Posted by: Mimi at April 25, 2008 7:34 PM

Every time I signed in __ Bigblackconnect.com __ and there were always many women would talk to me ... It is a funny and interesting place to talk to these thoughtful women.

Posted by: Mess at April 25, 2008 11:03 PM

Jennifer Tilly was in my college class. Sure, she looks fabulous, but I didn't think of myself as "holy freakin shit almost 50" until now. Thanks.

Posted by: Miss Cellania at April 25, 2008 11:53 PM

Back in my actressin' days, I was clockin' easy ducats as a general stand-in for a mighty crap fest starring Kelly Preston, Jennifer Tilly and Patrick Bergin, plus a few other kooks in Vancouver.

All I can remember thinking about Jennifer Tilly was that being around her was like being locked in a room at Tiger Beat with a horde of 13 year old girls - she was fully demented. I can see how she'd maintain her youthfulness with all her shenanigans. Bound kinda made up for the experience though...also got to meet a plump ass - soon to revive Travolta, plus witnessed an awesome on-set meltdown from Bergin over his chest appearance. heh...I'll never work in this town again. (which is okay, 'cause I'm old now anyways, and frankly...acting kind of sucks more than you'd suspect).

Posted by: replica at April 26, 2008 4:43 AM

Take that Apatow! Michael Swain you got into my head, now how do I get into your pants?

Posted by: grinder at April 26, 2008 2:13 PM

I don't think I will be able to eat those Oreos after that. Jeebuz.

The FIRST thing that crossed my mind when I saw the Hillary photo was "Hmmm, I guess we know where the missing member of the final 5 is. Setting Earth up for a Caprican-esque Armageddon." So, does that make Hilary Earth's Baltar?

Posted by: Lindsey at April 26, 2008 2:15 PM

Now, I'll admit, I'm a little bitter at the moment, given the fact that I am currently at work on a Saturday night. I work in a lab and the hours are never guaranteed, but being that the company does not test on chimps but rather hires them as lab techs, I have been working more weekends than I'd like lately, and subsequently have been hoarding obscene levels of 'tude. With this in perspective, I hope that I don't come across as assholish if I ask why the shit I'm being told that my possible perfect prom date may or may not be Zac fucking Efron (only after Pete 'your skinny jeans killed my best friend' Wentz) via online quiz compatibility, and that after joining the really really good looking society, I can be spanked with a fantasy-fulfilling bitch paddle while watching the hottie and the nottie on dvd. So... why the shit? Exactly?

Granted, my bitter rage could be affecting the way I interpret advertisements.

Posted by: J_Capri at April 26, 2008 9:23 PM

On a related note: I'd go gay for J.Tilly in a second. I have a thing for smoker's voice. An "I'm asthmatic and will febreeze you in the face if you don't go out on the porch" thing.

Posted by: J_Capri at April 26, 2008 9:24 PM

Yeah, holy freaking shit, I was sure you had to be wrong because I thought Jennifer Tilly and I were about the same age, and there is no way I'm almost 50, but no, she's got 4 years on me, which means, wait... I'm still going to be 50. Shit.

Posted by: medusa at April 27, 2008 9:13 AM

I have a better idea for a reality show. Jean Reno will reprise his role as Leon the Professional and each week will assassinate a different douchebag responsible for ruining entertainment - celebrities, musicians, executives, etc. Minors will only receive a severe beating, in hopes that they'll change their douchebaggy ways. But no torture porn stuff, just professional hitman-style...uh...hits. Save the Paris Hilton episode for sweeps week. Maybe Uwe Boll could be the premiere episode.
The tentative title is "Leon Kills Douchebags Responsible For Ruining Entertainment", but we can work on that - it didn't test well with the focus groups (lobotomized monkeys).

Posted by: Dave at April 28, 2008 10:40 AM

RE: Judd Apatow formula.

I remember feeling a strong sense of "where have I seen this exact montage of hurt manboy making something of himself so he can win back the lady he lost with his manboy-ish-ness?" while watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall. The formula article just feels right. But I'll take the formula.

Mostly because I want to hang out with Paul Rudd. Even if he forgets the bag of weed.

Posted by: artificialsweet5 at April 28, 2008 12:06 PM

Also, I wish they made those Strawberry Oreos (unnecessary caps?) in Double Stuf (more?).

But after reading that review, I can't help but wonder what exactly that says about me.

Posted by: artificialsweet5 at April 28, 2008 12:08 PM

I met my new friends at a cele hot club __Blackgirlsconnect.com__ several days ago. It is a funny and interesting place. So nice to talk and date some girls or guys on here.

Posted by: Morney at April 28, 2008 2:45 PM

Every time I signed in __ Bigblackconnect.com __ and there were always many women would talk to me ... It is a funny and interesting place to talk to these thoughtful women.

Posted by: Man at April 28, 2008 2:47 PM