Pajiba

As both a Whiskeytown fan and a Ryan Adams fan, it gives me to pleasure to begin plotting his death. But you gotta do what you gotta do, right?

Re: Levi/Bristol - I, for one, and fucking shocked. Shocked, I tell you.

[/cosmic level of sarcasm]

People are fucking insane. The entire lower half of my body seized up in terror reading that saw story.

Oh, Bristol and Levi. You've given us so much. Thanks for the memories...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbG-3MSJ0rY

I can't stop laughing at the fact that Phoenix was performing at the Fontainebleu. I had to stay there for business a few years ago. NO-ONE under 75 goes there for entertainment. No wonder he was heckled. It was way past the crowd's bed time.

...NASA is taking votes to name its new space station...

Serenity? No. Colbert? No. MurderStation? Fuck yes.

Screw Serenity, and "MurderStation" sounds cool but it shouldn't be relegated to a mere node...it should be what its name says it is A FULL FLEDGED STATION!

Colbert all the way. (Whereas design of the MurderStation shall commence...now.)

I’m the Salty Linkmaster around these parts and I can link whatever I damn well please.

Shhh, nobody tell her about the link....

Holy freaking God. A powersaw? That's some shit directly out of one of Saw XII, I think- "I've hidden the keys to your leg irons somewhere in your vagina, now use this powersaw to dig it out before the rabid bear eats your face.' Yes, there will be bears in Saw XII, even if it is direct-to-video.

I actually thought South Park was kind of disappointing. You're finally going to skewer the Jonas Brothers and that's the best you can come up with? It was pretty tame.

I guess to be fair, that wasn't their point. They were trying to skewer Disney, and made the Jonas Brothers kind of sympathetic. I know Disney is the real evil behind the various "teen sensations," but they even went really light on Disney. Mickey Mouse is an evil corporate dictator? Really? That's all you have?

After reading that saw story, I'm having Se7en flashbacks. You know the scene I'm talking about. My coochie wouldn't unclench for days after seeing that....

I voted for Serenity. It goes with the other two node names.

Although after reading what Node 3 is actually going to do (recycle shit, literally, and urine) maybe Colbert would have been the better name choice.

I'm guessing Bristol and Levi were done the minute she said, "Dude, I'm pregnant and my mom won't let me have an abortion."

Doucheknuckle, eh?
I kinda like the sound of it, but it makes me wonder, since I did not realize that douches were articulated... is the doucheknuckle the point at which the douchenozzle is connected to the douchebag, using the douchetool?

And, actually, last night's South Park made me, a couple of times, laugh until my liver hurt.
But upon reflection, that may have just been a result of the Rumpleminze I.V. I had going earlier in the day.

I don't think it's Don Draper's character who walks around barefoot. I think it's one of his bosses. I can't remember the character's name (something Cooper), but he's played by David Morse. So, if you have a boss who claims to be obsessed, and can't sort that basic thing out, he's pretty dumb. I haven't even seen every episode.

I often cast aside something if I'm tired of the hype surrounding it, or if someone who I find repulsive is in its cheering section. That said, I watched MAD MEN because I nothing else to do (that one time), and it is a really good show.

And this is coming from a person is so tired of the 'rotting facade of suburbia' genre. So rote, so condescending. I've never even lived in a suburb before, and I want to yell at the people involved in making these films,'shut the fuck up. Because you're such a freaking brain trust, huh? You're unique!' I mean, was I supposed to be sad by the ending of REVOLUTIONARY ROAD? Because if I lived near April Wheeler, I'd throw a fucking block party after that idiot accidentally offed herself. Paris? I guess your brain works as well as your acting does. Why die now? Why not an hour and a half ago? But everyone else in the theatre was crying...because they're weak. I understand this now.

I had the same feelings about AMERICAN BEAUTY, too. Maybe I actually just think Sam Mendes is overrated. I definitely think Cameron Crowe is visited each night by the Anodyne Fairy. At any rate, I find the show better than that stuff.

As far as modeling your life after Don Draper? Not smart. The character is a badass, no doubt. But he's also (often) bad, and (almost unfailingly) an ass when all things are considered. So, watch your back, Stacey. I think your boss is living under an assumed name and is a serial philanderer. God help you if see a copy of ELIZABETHTOWN on his person. That's the time to run.

Good show, though.

My vagina just winced. I wasn't aware it was capable of a fuller spectrum of emotions instead of just being either happy or pissed off.
Posted by: Quorren at March 12, 2009 2:20 PM

Because I was still reading with one hand covering my eyes from the powersaw story, I misread that as "a fuller speculum"

what, no one's heard of fuckingmachines.com?

i can't be the only one!

dammit, Jay.

As for the space station, it should either be named Serenity, The Buffy, or The Millenium Falcon.

I bet NASA kinda regrets opening it up for public voting.

SERENITY!!!

what, no one's heard of fuckingmachines.com?

i can't be the only one!

I've been asking that question since I've heard this story. This has been done safely for years - but these people are morons.

Ah! Jo, please put a spoiler tag on that! You may have not like Revolutionary Road but some of us have been aquivering to see the divine silver screen reunion of Leo and Kate.

And the vagina story...natural selection at work. yikes!

Yes, I've seen fuckingmachines.com, but to use a godsdamned saw on yourself - Sweet Jesus, I don't even HAVE a vagina and that makes me hurt inside.

Anyway.

The Space Station should have "Fuck You Hard, Claudius Ptolemy" emblazoned on its side with a nude 'nose art' of Hypatia on one of the modules. It should have laser cannons to sweep away debris (because nothing should be allowed to get in the way of Science!)

I wholeheartedly endorse the inclusion of the zombie shield and the whiskey fountain, too. How about a zero-g hot tub?

Am I having a stupid day, or is the voting mechanism doohickey not there on the NASA link? The page says vote over there on the right, but all I see is the list of the top 10...
Maybe I'm too traumatized thinking about saw blades attacking my vagina to focus.

Posted by: Jo 'Mama' Besser at March 12, 2009 2:59 PM

Jo, I have to disagree with the American Beauty bit, but I am all for the Revolutionary Road hate. If I wanted to see a married couple that truly hated each other, I'd stay home and hear my parents argue. Other than that, give me a story to work with, with people I actually like or can hate in an interesting enough way to continue watching.