free counter with statistics Pajiba Love 02/27/08 | Pajiba - Scathing Reviews for Bitchy People

garybusey.jpg

Pajiba Love

I didn’t possibly think I could *heart* crazy motherfucking Gary Busey any more, and then he goes and does this. Bravo, Señor El Loco! (Celebitchy)

Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz embarrass mankind. (WIMB)

First Matt Damon, then Ben Affleck. Now it’s Seth Rogen’s turn to get some lovin’. (quickstop)

My health insurance doesn’t even cover the kind of birth control pills I like and these chumps are getting free phone sex?! What. The. Fuck. (QuizLaw)

The paranoia is starting to set in that the StuffWhitePeopleLike people are actually spying on me and taking notes. How else would they know I recently purchased a SIGG bottle?! For the love of God, how would they know?? (StuffWhitePeopleLike)

Help a brother out, y’all! Reader Ian’s submission for the “Diary of the Dead” Contest. Mmm… Braaaaiiinnsss… (myspace)

Hee! I loved that episode of “The Simpsons” featuring Lindsey Naegle’s “Singles, Seniors, Childless Couples and Teens, and Gays.” Not to knock on you breeding types out there. (Feministing)

Milk vs. Saline. Place? Christina Aguilera’s boobs. Go! (IDLYITW)

The prophecy of Network has come true, and we’ve got a brand new Howard Beale! (Deus Ex Malcontent)

So I kind of am in love with this: What would you fill your well with? I think I’d fill mine with some good-ass sushi and a trip to an art museum. (Chelsea Talks Smack)

Oh, and I think I’d also put some of this Save the Honey Bee ice cream in my well, while I’m at it. (Serious Eats)

A look back at Nicole Kidman before her blood was replaced with that stuff Mr. Wizard used to freeze apples in. (Agent Bedhead)

After the jump, Keith Olbermann and Patton Oswalt discuss “Gaydolf Titler” and the political correctness of current political humor. Don’t miss it!

Pajiba Love | February 27, 2008 | Comments (47)


← Proud, Embarrassed, and Sorry | Just When You Thought It Was Safe To Go Back In The Pajiba →



Comments

Patton and Keith? I think I just got the vapors.

Posted by: Mimi at February 27, 2008 3:48 PM

That Seth Rogen version is funnier when you remember all the complaints about Knocked Up and the homely dude/hot chick sex dilemma. I like how he is so thrilled, and Elizabeth is disgusted. Of course, leave it to Smith to put that extra bit of nastiness on the end there.

Fuck zombies and the filthy zombie-lovers that support them. Fuck them all.

Patton Oswalt rules. And I am fairly certain he hates zombies.

Posted by: Vermillion at February 27, 2008 3:56 PM

I never thought I'd rush to the defense of Christina Aguilera's boobies, but it is possible for them to look all hard and off-kliter and uneven and somehow... angular when they're engorged.

Sadly, I know this all too well. Just looking at those pictures makes my cheechers ache.

Posted by: Mella at February 27, 2008 4:12 PM

Can I go back and list Network as the movie I'm now ashamed to not have seen?

Posted by: feramones at February 27, 2008 4:16 PM

First of all, I just want to say that I picked a bad time to go on vacation - I missed the homosexuality/religion debate and then I made it in the Box Office Roundup!

For everyone who is thinking of buying a Sigg bottle, I'll let you in on a little secret. I already have a bottle that is resealable, reusable, and washable. It's the plastic water bottle I got out of the vending machine. You can fill it with tap water, filtered water, even water from other bottles. If you want it personalized, you can take a permanent magic marker and write your name, and even draw a little picture. All for the low low price of $1.25. Free 20 oz. of water with each purchase!

Posted by: Three-nineteen at February 27, 2008 4:19 PM

Diiiid.... soooomme....ooooonnneee... calllll... forrrrr... a... zommmmbieeeee?????

BRAAAAAAAINNNNNSSSSSSS....

VERM... ILLLLL... IONNNNNNN!!!!!

*guuuuuhhhhhh*

Posted by: Zombie TK at February 27, 2008 4:44 PM

DAMN YOU!!!! DAMN YOU TO HELLLLL!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Vermillion at February 27, 2008 4:48 PM

Hah...that didn't take very long.

Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at February 27, 2008 4:49 PM

I've been here too often the past few weeks, I knew that was TK before even scrolling down to his name.

I need Pajibahab.

Posted by: Julie at February 27, 2008 4:50 PM

Ha!

Posted by: zombie bedhead at February 27, 2008 4:53 PM

After many, many minutes spent staring at Christina's boobs..hiding the browser when the boss comes around....memorizing every curve and plump goodness...trying to imagine the size of the bra holding those puppies up...suppressing the urge to get the milk out of the breakroom fridge....

...ummm....I lost track of my point. Let's see if I can find it again if I spend the rest of the day staring at Christina's boobs...

Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at February 27, 2008 4:55 PM

Shadows, look away my friend. Those boobs will eat you.

Posted by: Julie at February 27, 2008 5:01 PM

They're like a train wreck...just can't look away. I...can't....think anymore....

BRAAAAAAAINNNNNSSSSSSS....(cough, cough)

BOOOOOOOOBSSSSSSS

Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at February 27, 2008 5:14 PM

I have a friend whose boobs went up to a size HH when she had her daughter. She was only about a size 6 at the time. She had to order her bras from the hospital because they were so big, and they cost something like $200 each. It was nuts. Men would literally stop, sometimes trip over themselves, and stare creepily at her wherever she went. We were at a play once and a guy reached out and fondled her, in public, without even asking first. Like, his brain stopped functioning to the point that he forgot it was inappropriate.

Posted by: Sarina at February 27, 2008 5:16 PM

I have a friend whose boobs went up to a size HH when she had her daughter.>/i>

Hol. Lee. CRAP. How on earth did she stand upright?!

One of my best friends recently became pregnant, and she's naturally a DD...I've been having way too much fun making fun of her soon-to-be overabundance of boobage.

We were at a play once and a guy reached out and fondled her, in public, without even asking first.

!!! That's so gross, it's bad enough pregnant women have to put up with strangers touching their stomachs, let alone their tits. I would have bitten off his fingers.

Posted by: Julie at February 27, 2008 5:24 PM

I'm still not sick of the "I'm fucking ______________" meme.

I'm looking forward to the Jolie-Pitt version. That one will be AWESOME.

Posted by: Slash at February 27, 2008 5:27 PM

We were at a play once and a guy reached out and fondled her, in public, without even asking first.

That is completely inappropriate. I would have asked...it's only polite.

But seriously...HH? I'm with Julie...how was she able to walk?

Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at February 27, 2008 5:27 PM

Xtina's tits are not up to par fellas, I just cannot give my seal approval to that Capsular Contracton and blue-veinage disaster. Yes, I said disaster, I can get that shit in any Kansas City titty bar.

C'mon, let's stick to some standards people.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at February 27, 2008 5:29 PM

True dat, Slim. True motherfucking dat.

Posted by: TK at February 27, 2008 5:31 PM

"...let alone their tits. I would have bitten off his fingers..."

Posted by: Julie at February 27, 2008 5:24 PM

------------------------------------------------

I know what you mean, men are pigs. Say, are you *cough* *cough* single? I see you like fingers and, well I ...have some..wattaya say?

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at February 27, 2008 5:32 PM

Oh, you mistake my intent, my friend. Those were expressions of fascination and awe. As in....how can this happen? Milk vs Silicone = veiny cleavage. It's like seeing dead bird in your yard...you should look away, but you can't. It's just so unnatural that you want to imprint it in your mind.

And stay away from Julie...she's mine. I mean...I was promised consummations over tiled board games....

Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at February 27, 2008 5:39 PM

B-Slim! I said bite off, not suck on...or nibble...or anything else that will get me into more trouble.

Posted by: Julie at February 27, 2008 5:39 PM

But seriously...HH? I'm with Julie...how was she able to walk?

Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at February 27, 2008 5:27 PM

Very uncomfortably. She had to wear a back brace. She got a breast reduction a couple of months after she stopped nursing. She now refers to those days as "the boob era" and says that, had she been so inclined, she could have taken over the world.

Posted by: Sarina at February 27, 2008 5:40 PM

had she been so inclined, she could have taken over the world.

She really could have!

Aw, Shadows, there's always room-after all, it is an orgy :)

Posted by: Julie at February 27, 2008 5:44 PM

Well, alright....but he'd better bring taco dip.

Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at February 27, 2008 5:46 PM

Hee! It always comes back to taco dip.

Posted by: Julie at February 27, 2008 5:48 PM

Guh, those Xtina shots make my boobs ache with the memory of their former tig-ole-biddy breastfeeding roles.

A few months after my son was born, a good friend took a snap shot on his phone of me holding Little Pink at a restaurant and e-mailed it to me. I almost burst into tears when I saw it, not because of the glorious beauty of my new son, but because I couldn't get past the fact that I looked like I was in serious contention for Miss Nude Basketballs 2006.

Posted by: Alabamapink at February 27, 2008 6:22 PM

Three-nineteen: Yes, you can reuse your commercial plastic water bottles if you are so inclined, but you need to wash it in hot soapy water after each use if you don't want bacteria cultivating in there. Generally after a few washings, the plastic (PET) will start to break down, because it's not designed to last like a Nalgene is. Thus, you're better off just shelling out the $10 for the Nalgene (at least, until it gives you the cancer).

Posted by: Lannie at February 27, 2008 7:53 PM

I'm telling you: Tostitos Monterey Jack Queso

I have an excellent vocabulary and I suck at Scrabble. But I've been close enough to a group that I could tell I can't and don't want to multi-task. I'll go have a few drinks and meet back up with you all for Trivial Pursuit to clear your heads.

White *women* sure are buying those bottles. They're all over at work. I thought it was just that group. But that doesn't bother me too much. What bothers me is being the one person who doesn't want to turn up the heat. But, you make your female-dominated bed.... (and there's sure no fantasy paradigm for male librarians. I'm stuck with the nurses on that one.) (But it makes me so mad when it's assumed that the librarian turns into sexy when she *removes* her glasses).

But back on topic, no one ever tells a boy that breasts are so much bigger than they look at a distance. Maybe it just has to be learned the hard way. A man's got to know his limitations and I'm older and much wiser now.

Posted by: Jay at February 27, 2008 8:12 PM

I worked with a guy who once lectured me for 20 minutes about the health risks of drinking regular tap water. Said lecture happened as he was about to go on his smoke break.

Posted by: Nora Borealis at February 27, 2008 8:21 PM

Julie - I'm going to a book club meeting tomorrow night and I'm bringing your Spin Art!!!

Posted by: Kolby at February 27, 2008 8:33 PM

there's sure no fantasy paradigm for male librarians

Oh yes there is! And just to further secure my spot in hell, all fantasies occur in the spiritual section.

Posted by: Julie at February 27, 2008 8:35 PM

Zombies?

check

Boardgames?

check

New addition?

Boobies

Coming soon?

Rampaging beavers...

Posted by: general rhubarb at February 27, 2008 9:24 PM

The zombie clip was a hoot and a half. Damn, do I love some homemade zombie action. Somehow it's more creepier than the slicked-up Hollywood versions.

I wanted to send the film to Vermillion via e-mail and trick him into opening it by making the subject of my e-mail "Boo and Alex: Hot Nekkid Action." But it wouldn't be worth it if I couldn't be there to see look on his face when the clip started rolling.

Posted by: Alabamapink at February 27, 2008 9:29 PM

Oh yes there is! And just to further secure my spot in hell, all fantasies occur in the spiritual section.

Hmmm...I used to have a summer job working in my local library...

Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at February 27, 2008 9:44 PM

Coming soon?

Rampaging beavers...

Oh my sweet line-dancing Jesus, it's the "rampaging" that made me laugh for 10 minutes.

Shadows...oh really?? Wanna desecrate the children's aisle? :)

Posted by: Julie at February 27, 2008 9:56 PM

I wanted to send the film to Vermillion via e-mail and trick him into opening it by making the subject of my e-mail "Boo and Alex: Hot Nekkid Action." But it wouldn't be worth it if I couldn't be there to see look on his face when the clip started rolling.

That is pure evil. I cannot believe a mother would have the cold heart to even consider such a horrible ruse. Lex Luthor could take lessons from you.

What else should I expect from a dirty zombie lover?

Posted by: Vermillion at February 27, 2008 10:06 PM

Why am I confusing the bold for the italics?

I blame the ZOMBIES!!!!!

Posted by: Vermillion at February 27, 2008 10:07 PM

Librarians are AWESOME!!! It's a fact.
Just because I'm doing my masters in library science has does not effect my reality.

Posted by: IamKateness at February 28, 2008 12:09 AM

Thank ya, Ma'am

Posted by: Jay at February 28, 2008 12:14 AM

oh and on a completely older topic, let me refer your attention to someone who loves the idea of sequels and the Electric Boogaloo.... http://www.iwatchstuff.com/2008/02/step_up_3d_denotes_third_stepp.php

Posted by: Betty at February 28, 2008 12:31 AM

Excuse me, but did any of you actually look closely at that picture of Christina Aguilera? Really, really closely? Take your time. Stare. Examine. See that weird looking pucker/ridge on the left twin? Implants being forced out of whack. See the scarring on the right one? And the ones in the middle of her chest? That wasn't a boob job, it was a hatchet job. I never thought I'd see the day when I felt sorry for her, but my memory of the D-to-E jump when I was pregnant and the subsequent horrid pain is all too fresh. If I'd been having to deal with silicone, too, I'd have started taking hard drugs.

Posted by: Kris at February 28, 2008 2:04 AM

Thaaaat's what's been missing from the orgies. Rampaging beavers. I knew we'd forgotten something.

Julie, darling, you warm my cold shrivelled heart. Want to make out in the psychology section? Y'know...just to give that perv Freud something to watch.

Is it strange that I'm turned on by guys who like to read? I think my bibliophilia is getting out of hand.

Posted by: joker at February 28, 2008 6:53 AM

Re: the Wonder Bread demographic and pricey water bottles:

a) If the tap water in your area is not potable, why the fuck are you not storming your City Hall and demanding basic governmental services?

b) If you simply must have your foofoo water, what the fuck is wrong with a washable thermal coffee cup of the type that every commuter in North America already owns?

Posted by: Jerce at February 28, 2008 7:56 AM

Cracked recently uncovered that the problem with Scientology is that it is, well, kind of gay:
http://www.cracked.com/video_15972_scientology-nice.html

Posted by: Betty at February 28, 2008 11:09 AM

OK, seriously, y'all are scaring me with the pregnancy boob talk. Do they all really get that large? D to E? Size 6 (that's what I am) with HH boobs????? Good lord! My back hurts enough now. Damn.

Also, re: male librarians. Trust me. There's a fantasy paradigm out there. Julie, you can take the spiritual section, I'm working towards the self-help aisle. Wait, that doesn't make sense...

Posted by: em at February 28, 2008 11:45 AM

Um.... Gary Busey's teeth are really scaring me. That and those growths formerly known as boobs on - dunno if I'll sleep tonight.

I remember hearing the thing which scares Stephen King the most is a vagina with teeth (I'm sure one of you Pajibans know the term for it). Doesn't the Busey Maw kinda remind you of that?

Or maybe that giant worm from Return of the Jedi that eats Boba Fett?

Posted by: GinKirk at February 28, 2008 1:59 PM