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The Squirrel Speaks Out

By Stacey Nosek | Posted Under Pajiba Love | Comments (53)



squirrel2.jpg

Yesterday I mentioned Conan O’Brien’s new twitter page, and now the squirrel he interviewed has one as well. Because, of course it does. This is why I love the internet. (twitter)

I don’t know why I haven’t linked this sooner, but an old friend of mine is an amazing artist who does pop culture-related prints, and his latest — an illustrated collage of Say Anything — is available to view or purchase on his website, as well as prints of the Evil Dead movies and The Big Lebowski, among others. (Jim Horwat.com)

Audiosuede has a new feature examining the newest musical genres from around the world. Today, the word is “Futura.” ’80s synth sound-alikes that actually AREN’T being ironic! (Audiosuede)

I’ve lost count with how many times Miley Cyrus has done something age inappropriate and she’s not even recanting it anymore. So her singing a sexy duet with Bret Michaels is barely even news. (Litelysalted)

Here are a bunch of guys who should be directing all these horror remakes coming out, but aren’t. (Cinematical)

It seems like this “American Idol” business has been going on forever now, but they’re only just now down to 20 contestants. (Hairballs)

With Charlie Sheen in rehab and possibly heading to jail — news that Jon Cryer’s wife had a hit out him just makes me know deep down that “Two and a Half Men” is headed for imminent destruction. Pray with me. (Warming Glow)

In 1995 Newsweek published an article on why the internet will fail. Let’s all point and laugh at them now. (Unlikely Words)

In the most unsubstantiated internet rumor of the day that I hope SO HARD is actually true: Scarlett Johansson and Axl Rose are friends, and play ping-pong together. (Agent Bedhead)

For all of you hardcore Danny Elfman fans out there, (My boyfriend is one — what?) you can now stream his entire score to Alice in Wonderland from Disney’s website. (The Playlist)

Today in “Fuck You Kirstie Alley, You Fat Bastard” news, Kirstie Alley is running a new weight loss program that’s almost definitely a front for Scientology. This is probably why she’s STILL FAT. (Celebitchy)

Here are seven actors typecast in bizarrely specific roles. (Cracked)

In what should come to a surprise to no one, seven entire drugs were found in Brittany Murphy’s system. Guess seven is an unlucky number after all. (Celebslam)

Even Stevens sent me this link for a “Lost” timeline, which dates back to the 1800s. Christ on a cracker, this show goes all the way back to the 1800s? (The Compass)

This was news to me, but in 1989 Jay Leno starred in a movie called Collision Course with Pat Morita, and the internet was kind enough to compress the most sexist, racist bits into this three minute clip. Suck it, Leno!

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.









Bruce Willis Career Assessment | Doctor Who American Release Set













Comments

I need to go Google all those drugs BMurph had in her system. Except the Percocet.

Posted by: Nicole at February 26, 2010 1:35 PM

Wait, that was Vicodin. I thought it said Oxycodone.

Posted by: Nicole at February 26, 2010 1:36 PM

To the 3 or 4 people who haven't already read this, Boner from "Growing Pains" committed suicide.

Posted by: Captain Informer at February 26, 2010 1:37 PM

Hydrocodone. And I TOTALLY called it on the day the news broke. I KNEW motherfucking prescription pills were the culprit. They similarly killed a 32 yo friend of mine. Lethal Interaction, heart attack, dead. To be sure he was abusing them, took more than he should, but still, no need to die for it. Those damn things are fucking dangerous, and the doctors need to quit handing them out like tic-tacs.
OK. Rant over.

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at February 26, 2010 1:48 PM

Boner. Son of Checkov. You will be missed.

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at February 26, 2010 1:49 PM

Lindsey's point is excellent; they hand that shit out like it's Halloween. She shouldn't have been mixing the cough syrup with the heart medication, for fuck's sake, let alone the painkillers. And Prozac is contraindicated for a lot of stuff too. (Yes, I Googled.)

Posted by: Nicole at February 26, 2010 1:51 PM

Whoops. I actually meant to include a link for that today, Cap'n Informer.

Posted by: Stacey at February 26, 2010 1:54 PM

In the area I live in, which is small town Ontario, addiction to Oxy and similar drugs is so rampant that someone (myself, who has a severe form of arthritis) who could legitimately use those kinds of drugs cannot get them. The Doctors here will not prescribe them. I've actually debated telling the Dr. that if he will not prescribe them to me I will go buy them from the street. They certainly don't hand them out like tic-tacs where I live.

Posted by: Jadine at February 26, 2010 1:56 PM

Boner. Son of Checkov. You will be missed.

That's what geep said.

Posted by: Xtreme at February 26, 2010 2:01 PM

I'm with Jadine. Oxycodone and its relatives are Schedule 4 controlled substances. Doctors (legitimate ones) do not hand them out like tic-tacs. They have quite a significant reporting burden whenever they write an Rx for them. If you know of a doc handling them out freely, he/she is breaking the law, report them now.

Posted by: PaddyDog at February 26, 2010 2:03 PM

@Jadine: (ironically) I would be happy to forward you all of the CanadianMeds spam I receive daily in my email account. Maybe they can help.

Posted by: banana at February 26, 2010 2:04 PM

My wife had a pretty serious addiction to Vicodin that she sought help for a few months ago. It was getting really bad, and now we have a fortune in emergency room bills and copays that will follow us forever, most likely.

Posted by: Snath at February 26, 2010 2:12 PM

I just know from my own experiences how accessible that stuff is. Granted, the DEA is starting to crack down on docs now (I have to take random drug tests when I see my pain management physician) but as long as I keep my appointments I get refills. I'm lucky that Vicodin holds no real high or charm for me; if I took more than one I would barf. And you can believe I keep that bottle on lockdown from everyone.

Posted by: Nicole at February 26, 2010 2:13 PM

@banana, thanks, but no thanks. I'll just keep taking copious amounts of Advil.

Posted by: Jadine at February 26, 2010 2:16 PM

Oh, shit, I posted before I meant to. My ex "father-in-law" died of an accidental overdose when he mixed the meds he got from the VA. Why they were giving him four kinds of painkillers simultaneously, I've no idea, but they just dispensed whatever, plus antidepressants and sleeping pills. It was out of control.

Posted by: Nicole at February 26, 2010 2:16 PM

There are a lot of rural Canadian places with serious Oxycodone issues (most of Cape Breton, for example) but I'm still shocked at how easy it is to get a prescription.

My boyfriend was having wrist pain, likely induced by his Blackberry, and before suggesting physio (or telling him to toss is berry) he was given Oxycodone. I made him toss that shit.

Posted by: Danielle at February 26, 2010 2:22 PM

I have to say, no matter what kind of problem my wife had with Vicodin, I LOVE that shit. Oh man, do I love Vicodin. Pop a couple and you just feel GOOD. Like, really good.

My kids could be shitting all over and throwing knives at each other but "Hey, it's okay now. Stop, everyone. Chill out. Group hug time! Let's all sit down and watch a movie. Lalalala."

Meanwhile my wife is pulling out her own hair and trying to jump out a window.

Posted by: Snath at February 26, 2010 2:29 PM

That clip of Jay Leno was amazing. Even though it was completely different then his Tonight Show act, it still manages to be exactly as entertaining.

Posted by: EricD at February 26, 2010 2:30 PM

drugs? you'd hafta either take drugs, or have the squirrel take them.. to him to wear those sandals :)

Posted by: kikz at February 26, 2010 2:36 PM

600mg Ibuprofen and 500 Mg Ex strength Tylenol has essentially the same painkiller as 1 Vicodin. No opiates.
I lived in constant pain for years. Thank goodness I had already fucked up and gone to rehab when I was 22(booze, but I don't take any mood altering drugs at all anymore), because if I had had the ready option of prescription pain pills during that time, God only knows what would have happened. 20 Ibuprofen a day is no joke either, but no opiates at least. All that pain left when the Husband did, interestingly enough. Huh. Maybe all this 'Pain' could be addressed from a variety of fronts.
My friend Brandon was beautiful. But the online Pharmacy based in Mexico that filled his endless prescription written by a doctor he never met didn't know that. He did it to himself, no argument, but couched in respectability because it wasn't technically 'illegal' he broke himself on those pills, and they took him. And a lot of the pain he was medicating wasn't physical, to be sure. He was failed on many levels, and I fear our Ms. Murphy was too.

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at February 26, 2010 2:36 PM

accck... to get the squirrel to wear... *emily latella*

sigh.... nevermind

Posted by: kikz at February 26, 2010 2:37 PM

That's what geep said.
Posted by: Xtreme at February 26, 2010 2:01 PM

are you calling me out?! let's take this to facebook, bitch!

Posted by: gp at February 26, 2010 2:45 PM

Lindsey, I'm sorry that you had to go through that kind of loss. Knowing that it was preventable made me so angry. Regarding my pain, if I'm in danger of becoming addicted to anything, it's my TENS unit. That thing is awesome - you put the little electrodes on, and turn on the little machine that sends these volt charges to the pain receptors, and it makes the pain stop. I actually love the fact that the best treatment I have is completely non-pharmaceutical.

Posted by: Nicole at February 26, 2010 2:47 PM

Hey! I gave up gossip blogs for Lent! Now I have to start all over!

Posted by: Nicole at February 26, 2010 2:53 PM

Jadine, that is actually why I can't get Adderoll anymore, even though I really need it. Doctors, or at least my current physician, are really stingy with it. As if it isn't obvious that I need- oh, a kitty!

Posted by: Patty O'Green at February 26, 2010 3:01 PM

On an unrelated note, I lurve that LOST timeline. Flawed, certainly, but helpful as well.

Posted by: Patty O'Green at February 26, 2010 3:02 PM

Patty O' Green, I'm sitting here looking at the very red and swollen knuckles of my right hand that I can't even close all the way and they won't give me a damn thing. There are times when I can't brush my own hair or lift my arm much past my waist when my shoulders flare up, yet I can't get anything prescription for pain. Stingy bastards. However, I sort of understand why they have to be that way. I'm pretty sure the 60+ year old lady living downstairs from me is selling pills.

Posted by: Jadine at February 26, 2010 3:08 PM

On a completely unrelated note, I was reading Adrian Amos' blog today and I think he's really going through some rough shit right now. Can we all just send him our positive thoughts and comments? I think he could use some uplifting right about now. Thanks.

Posted by: Jadine at February 26, 2010 3:23 PM

I had a bruised shin last fall from a soccer game collision. After limping around for two days I went to the health center to make sure I didn't have a hairline fracture (my leg HURT pretty much anytime it wasn't actually propped up above my heart and would throb if I was sitting or standing for a long time). Before the doctor even sent me in to get an X-ray she wrote me a script for Percocet. For 30 Percocet. That was last October, I still have plenty now because who the fuck needs 30 Percocet for pain that's going to last two weeks at most and can be handled with generous amounts of Advil? I contemplated selling it because I'm broke but my better nature won out.

There are some doctors who take a heavy hand when writing those painkiller scripts and it is unfortunate that it can impact people in genuine pain who need the drugs. And it's unfortunate when people can get their hands on enough of these drugs to do real damage to themselves or their families. There are no easy answers.

Posted by: Intern Rusty at February 26, 2010 3:24 PM

Vicodin makes me a drooling, crying, sleepy yet unable to sleep wreck. I had stomach cramps and nausea and every side effect except for the rash when I took those bastards. I hate them. I just tell the doctor that I'm allergic to them because I never want to have anything close to them again. Give me a 500mg ibuprofen and I'm a happy gal, pain-wise.

Posted by: Pinky McLadybits at February 26, 2010 3:30 PM

I'm pretty sure the 60+ year old lady living downstairs from me is selling pills.

Well, at least we know you can get them somewhere...

Posted by: Patty O'Green at February 26, 2010 3:34 PM

Well, at least we know you can get them somewhere...

I can't stand the woman and who knows, she could poison me or something. I would be too nervous to buy something like that illegally, you never know what you're going to get. For the time being I'll just suck it up and wonder why the hell I was afflicted with this Godforsaken arthritis. I'm too young for this bullshit.

Posted by: Jadine at February 26, 2010 4:01 PM

news that Jon Cryer’s wife had a hit out him just makes me know deep down that “Two and a Half Men” is headed for imminent destruction. Pray with me.

I will pray for the destruction of that show, if only so my Dad will stop forcing me to watch when I go over to his house for dinner. But I can't get down with Jon Cryer being killed, because come on. It's Ducky.

Posted by: Jeni at February 26, 2010 4:09 PM

Hey, kids, prescription drugs are still drugs. ALL drugs (including aspirin) have side effects, side effects that are more likely the longer you take the drug (and the more of it you take). And drug interactions can fucking kill you.

People have been offing themselves accidentally with prescription meds for as long as we've had prescription meds, so it's not all that shocking to me when famous people do it. They're not any smarter than we are. But I bet they are a lot more likely to get meds when they ask for them. I bet there are tons of people in southern CA who will write a script for anything you want, if you pay enough.

I've never had Percocet or Vicodin. Strongest painkiller I've ever had is Tylenol.

Posted by: Slash at February 26, 2010 4:17 PM

As detestable as Two And A Half Men is, I cannot pray for it's destruction. It is a waste of prayer; that ship will sink itself. But I will pray for your pain management, Jadine. And that your crazy neighbor doesn't poison you.

Posted by: Patty O'Green at February 26, 2010 4:26 PM

Thank you, Patty O'Green, you're a sweet soul.

Posted by: Jadine at February 26, 2010 4:31 PM

Diversion ahoy re pain meds. About 4 years back, I had a head and chest cold that lingered for about 2 wks. Then I got this pain & stiffness at the lower back of my skull, sorta behind my ears. It was this truly excruciating pain for a couple days that I couldn't sleep, eat, sit up, think, ect. I ready to hurt someone (never mind my 3 dear pets).

So off to the ER I was driven and right quick. Turns out, they thought I had the spinal menengitis. After some of these tests and that examination, they tell me I'm getting a spinal tap (a whugh *whught*?!). I'm so sketched out at this point from pain and fear, they decide that I need an injection of I think it was Ativan.

Within a half hour, I'm about as mell-lel-low as I've ever felt. They do the tap and then I wait about 2 hours in bed for the labs to come back. My Dad had driven in from 2.5 hrs away at that point and he tells me I nothing but goobershite to share with him conversationally.

A while later, we're at the drug store walking around {{I was released from hospital ER as it wasn't menengitis but 'cold/flu cooties settled into my glands/muscles'. whatever 3 new perscriptions to kill everything and manage the pain}} and he's having to nearly hold me up, I'm so wobbley and groggy. All this lasted about 15 hrs and had to be one of the strangest highs (lows?) I've ever known. It was wild.

Posted by: Ms MoMo at February 26, 2010 4:50 PM

BM had seven drugs in her system and DIED from pneumonia yet none of the drugs were antibiotics i.e. drugs that would have saved her from the pneumonia. She wasn't afraid of going to the doctor's offices but she ended up dieing at home from a very treatable disease. I'm guessing that things like meth might have interfered with her decision making abilities.

Posted by: OscarTamerz at February 26, 2010 5:28 PM

A friend's father caught spinal menengitis and is now brain damaged. He was feeling strange, so they looked up his symptoms on Web MD. Web MD suggested that he might have spinal menengitis, so they hurried off to the hospital and told the doctors everything. The doctors and nurses, said, "This isn't spinal menengitis. Actually, it looks to us like he's having a drug overdose. You should go home. There is nothing we can do for him."

So they went home, distraught, in the hopes that it wasn't spinal menengitis and that they were just being paranoid. A couple hours later, things weren't getting better, so they called on the phone. They spoke to someone who diagnosed him over the phone and suggested that he was probably having a drug overdose.

A few more hours (and a sharp decline in his wellness) went by and they went back to the hospital. They flatly refused to go home this time and demanded under threats of legal action that he be treated. Turns out he had spinal menengitis -- and unfortunately, by this time, debilitating brain damage (I don't know exactly how this works, but this is how it's been explained to me).

The kicker? The doctor that finally diagnosed and treated him had the audacity to tell them, "If we'd only caught it a few hours earlier..."

I know that's off topic, but someone mentioned the illness and I needed to share. Web MD good. Doctors bad. And patients -- wow, patients need to be more aware of their body and less meek in the face of the almighty doctor. Patients need to have the balls to say, "No, I know my body and what you're telling me doesn't jive." Any nurse will tell you the EXACT same thing.

My friend's father, while a functioning person, currently has the personality of a four year old. It's good times when you want to install extra door handles on the doors, but not such a good times when you want a father.

Posted by: superasente at February 26, 2010 6:02 PM

Diversion!

When I had my wisdom teeth removed the kind pusher-people had quite the plan to make it all OK. First one side, then the other. Valium beforehand for "nerves", knock me out, then painkillers on the painkillers, and "If you need more, just ask."

- First, we're doing all 4 at once, because you won't get me back.

- Second, no Valium, and do it with a local.

- Third, how about half that many pain pills.

- I walked home from the surgery, about 12 blocks, with my teeth in my pocket. (How cool is that? They'll give you the teeth they pulled, if you ask. Then insist. If you're conscious to do that.)

One pill at night so I could sleep and in three days I wanted that next pill. Three pills. Three days. That's all it took. I turned the bottle upside down and left it in the medicine cabinet unitll I didn't want them any more. Took almost two years.

Posted by: BierceAmbrose at February 26, 2010 6:06 PM

I've been on Hydrocodone for the last four or five days. It was great at first since I didn't feel like I had been sledgehammered in the face anymore. But now, it's making me nauseous and giving me a headache. I'd much rather have some 800mg Ibuprofen, or you know, sparkly new teeth.

Posted by: jM at February 26, 2010 6:14 PM

The only time I took pain pills was when I had PRK (it's LASIK only without the flap) surgery on my eyes. Each time my eye felt so uncomfortable that I kept squinching my eyelid shut. After like 3 hours of doing that my eye socket muscles started to hurt like a motherfucker. So I took a pain pill and went to bed. My doctor was smart though. He wrote me one prescription for 7 pills. And that's all I got.

The pain pill doctor's offices are obvious. In fact, they're so fucking obvious that I can describe them to you. Here goes: full waiting room, most of the patients between 35-60 years old. All of the patients look like life beat them with a thorny branch. And the waiting room is always like that. Every time I've come across an office like that I'll ask my co-workers that have been in the territory much longer than I have, Hey is so-and-so a pain pill doc? And every time they say, Yes. It's surprisingly easy for a doctor to do that too. As long as they go through the steps of "pain management" they can write pain pills and it's hard for law enforcement to pin them down. I've known a couple that get caught, but a lot get away with it.

As for the issue of primary care physicians being allowed to write psychotropic and pain medication, I think there needs to be some sort of law that they can write one script and then the patient is required to go to a specialist for management of their disease state. I fucking twitch every time I see Pristiq or Kadian or something like that in a sample closet. Primary care doctors simply do not have the knowledge necessary to manage pain or mental health issues.

Jadine, have you looked into alternative therapies like acupuncture? It won't make the arthritis go away completely, but it will help relieve the pain. I know several primary care physicians that refer all of their pain patients to an acupuncturist.

Posted by: stardust at February 26, 2010 6:23 PM

I have way too many boring pain meds stories so I'll pass on this one. I did lose a wonderful friend last week and the probable cause is accidental overdose. Fibromyalga and Bipolar disorder are a bitch! Too many doctors involved, none seeming to pay any attention to what the others are prescribing. It's horriffic!

On to happier comments: I LOVE DANNY ELFMAN! Oingo Boingo was the shit and I love his compositions!

Posted by: trixie at February 26, 2010 7:31 PM

Dude, I don't care what you guys say, Jay Leno is fucking awesome! Who the fuck can say they really don';t like him without lying.

Posted by: fishnuts1989 at February 26, 2010 8:58 PM

*ahem* Parts of Cape Breton, Danielle, but I wouldn't say most. (Sorry chickie, I've got to stand up for my homeland!)

Oxycontin abuse has been really bad in some of the former mining towns; there was even a recent award-winning documentary, "Cottonland," about the situation in Glace Bay. Lately, the medical community has become more cautious about prescribing it, and it seems things are improving. But yeah, that's some scary stuff right there.

Posted by: meaux at February 26, 2010 11:54 PM

I sympathize with Jadine's predicament, since most people asking for pain medication want only to treat their very real pain problems. However, just last week in my own clinic, I met a new patient requesting vicodin for what sounded like a totally legitimate reason. He even had a big stack of his old medical records in hand to prove his point. I can't remember the last time I wrote a prescription for narcotics during a patient's first visit, but since he had his proof in hand, I gave him a small prescription for lower-dose vicodin than he normally got, and fewer tablets, since I needed to finish my background check and get a urine toxicology screen on him. Now I have his prescription report, showing no fewer than 54 different vicodin prescriptions from 23 different doctors within the past year, each of which was for over 100 tablets each. And his urine screen shows marijuana. He called today asking for more vicodin, and I laughed out loud.

And Stardust, they can write a law requiring referrals to specialists like psychiatrists and pain specialists as soon as they write the law granting all patients insurance coverage for psychiatrists and pain specialists. As a primary care provider myself, I'd love to be able to send all my complicated psychiatric patients for a consultation with a psychiatrist. I was lucky enough to get a lot of psychiatric training in my residency, and to have 2 excellent psychiatrists in my office that see some patients for free, but that sure seems to be the exception rather than the rule.

Posted by: roundapples at February 27, 2010 12:25 AM

Dude, I don't care what you guys say, Jay Leno is fucking awesome! Who the fuck can say they really don';t like him without lying.
Posted by: fishnuts1989 at February 26, 2010 8:58 PM

*Hand up*

Posted by: ChristianH at February 27, 2010 12:20 PM

P.S. LOL

Posted by: ChristianH at February 27, 2010 12:21 PM

Seeking the successful singles and take care of you - perhaps financially? http://euageless.com/ celebrates age gap dating and romance.

Posted by: Jim at February 28, 2010 9:44 PM

test

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at March 1, 2010 12:30 AM

Oh Cool
Now I haz the HTML

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at March 1, 2010 12:34 AM

Teach me, Master.

*bows*

Posted by: , at March 1, 2010 9:08 AM

As a diehard fan of Say Anything that Jim Horwat thing just made my night. THANK YOUUU!!!!

Posted by: grace b at March 1, 2010 9:49 PM


















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