Friends Don't Let Friends Drink And Blog
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Consider this my public service announcement: Never blog while drunk. Unless you’re Allie Brosh, in which case it’s hilarious. Or unless you’re writing Pajiba Love. What? There’s a mini-fridge in our living room and it had Bailey’s in it and I’m dead inside but I can stop whenever I want but not right now because I FUCKING NEED THIS YOU BASTARDS. (Hyperbole And A Half)
Here are 9 Mel Gibson cameos that people might actually want to see. You know what? Yes to the Smurfs cameo. I don’t know why, but something about Mel as Gargamel (See? He’s even got ‘mel’ in his name!) seems right. Also, he’d probably scream at Smurfette for getting in the Smurf tub before giving him Smurf-job. (Screen Junkies)
Alright, today’s quiz is all about banned books, so on top of scoring a decent amount on this quiz, award yourself a bonus point for each of the books here that you’ve actually read. Because reading is fun-da-mental! (Litely Salted)
Thanks to TK, here’s a list of the best French horror/extreme films of the decade. Am I the only one who’s ever seen Haute Tension in the original French? Because it’s pretty epic. One of the benefits of being from Quebec, I suppose. (One Metal)
The Randy Moss story, the rolling round-the-clock coverage, the stakeouts. “It feels like Lady Di just got killed. In football.” (Ugly Fours)
Alright, here’s an interview with the totally adorable Kate Nash who, to be honest with you, I’m kinda in love with. Seriously, if you’ve never heard Foundation, then you are missing the fuck out. (popbytes)
Here are the ten best movies about dreaming, and before you ask, yes, Inception is on the list. Oh, and there are a couple other spoilers on this list too, so be warned all who enter; You’re about to find out which of the good movies you’ve never seen were actually just a dream. (Unreality)
Oh hoo-fucking-rah. You know all those people that adamantly oppose gay marriage? Well as it turns out none of them actually have a valid excuse for it, other than “The bible says so”, which is funny because the one place in the Bible they gleaned that from is (A) actually talking about bisexual males (also not a sin), (B) also says that eating shellfish and clothing of mixed fabrics are punishable by death, and (C) absolutely nowhere in the new testament does it say that Jesus hated the gays. (Zelda Lily)
Okay everyone, it’s time to play “No seriously Heidi Klum, what in the fuckedy fuck are you wearing?” No, seriously, what the fuck is this shit? She looks like she just got dunked in purple Kool-Aid. Still, it could be worse: She could have been dressed by Gretchen Jones. NEVER FORGET. (Yeeeah!)
Because fuck all of you that’s why, Playboy is celebrating the 25th anniversary of Back To The Future by dressing their bunnies up in attire inspired by Marty and Doc Brown and doing a photoshoot. Incredible; they’ve managed to simultaneously beat a dead horse and rape your childhood at the same time. Now that’s service! (The Flickcast)
And now, just to instill a bit of fear into you, here’s Shaq in drag singing a Beyonce song. While this is perfectly SFW, I must warn you: It’s probably not safe for your soul. In fact, this is probably going to turn out to be the new Ring. (Evil Beet)
Just because I can, and also because this will probably deflate his ego ever-so-slightly, Kanye West’s dick pics that he, of course, sent out to a girl he wanted to bang, got leaked onto the internet. Hey Brett Favre, is this Super Mario Bros.? Because you just got 1-upped! (IHeartChaos)
You know what? I’m just going to present this without comment: Josef Fritzl, the man who trapped his own daughter in his dungeon basement for 24 years and used her as his personal sex-slave, said in an interview that Two And A Half Men is his favourite show because it always makes him laugh. Draw your own conclusions from this. (Gawker)
*Claps hands excitedly* Yay! The cute, hunky Australian guy who made the Surprise Party video is back! The best part about his videos is that you can watch them with the sound on or off, and they’re still good!
Jeremy Feist is a freelance writer, maker of lovin’, and an average-everyday-sane-psycho. You can check his NSFW blog here, or email him here.
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Comments
Posted by: Lauren at November 2, 2010 12:26 PM
Am I the only one who’s ever seen Haute Tension in the original French? Because it’s pretty epic.
Oh, did seeing it in French make the ending not crappy? That is pretty epic.