free counter with statistics Pajiba Love 02/11/09 | Pajiba - Scathing Reviews for Bitchy People

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Born Free … As Free As A Skank Cancer …

Pajiba Love / Stacey Nosek

Pajiba Love | February 11, 2009 | Comments (50)

Katherine Heigl and T.R. Knight have finally bitched and moaned their way out of their “Grey’s Anatomy” contracts. I can’t wait until they both make their Caruso-like exits from pop culture for the next decade or so. (WIMB)

Next up? America Ferrera is turning all diva on everybody’s asses. Do these bitches even know we’re in a recession, and that they can just as easily be replaced with reruns of “Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?” (Celebitchy)

Bruce Campbell! Bruce Campbell! Bruce Campbell! Bruce Campbell! (AV Club)

A former mafia hitman in witness protection was running a pizzeria called “Goomba’s” when he ended up pistol whipping a customer. It couldn’t have been less absurd if it came straight from an episode of “The Simpsons.” (QuizLaw)

Anna Friel is clearly in mourning over “Pushing Daisies,” as are we all. (The Blemish)

I love Eliza Dushku, but it seems like she’s posing half-nekkid (or just flat out nekkid) everywhere these days to promote “Dollhouse.” This week, she dumbs it down for Maxim. (Popoholic)

The always fabulous Michelle Pfeiffer is currently out in Berlin promoting her new film Chéri. (Film Experience)

Miley Cyrus has a cereal out, because of course she does; and it’s purple and pink colored, because of course it is. (TIB)

Hooray! Everyone loves before-they-were-stars celebrity commercials! (mental floss)

So I guess there’s a new Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue out now. Remember back in the day when this was like the closest thing to porn? I think my dad used to hide a copy in the bathroom. Site NSFW. (DrunkenStepfather)

My boyfriend and his friends have been writing this nonsensical encyclopedia site just for fun, and they told me not to link it here… But, when do I ever listen to what anyone tells me? I’m a rebel like that, bitches! (Naive’sGuideToEverything)

Does anyone here actually have any funny and/or ironic tattoos? Not to judge or anything, but that seems to fall into the “inevitable regret” category. (SWPL)

Here’s more canine adorableness from the Westminster Dog Show than you can shake a rawhide bone at. (Jezebel)

And for the tear-jerkiest anti-Prop 8 clip you’ll ever see, here is something from the Courage Campaign. Via Ink & Apples!


“Fidelity”: Don’t Divorce… from Courage Campaign on Vimeo.

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.


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Comments

We need more Bruce Campbell's in Hollywood. He's the fucking king baby!

Posted by: George at February 11, 2009 1:08 PM

AAARRGH PROP 8 I HATE I HATE I HATE.

I know plenty of gay men that are better parents together than most married couples I know. Strangely, I don't know any women couples with children, so I don't know if they would be good parents or not. Ha harr!

Posted by: Snath at February 11, 2009 1:08 PM

IT'S MILEY CEREAL!

Posted by: branded at February 11, 2009 1:14 PM

Damn.
I wish I could vote against Prop 8.

('scuse me, got something in my eye...)

Posted by: Tarn at February 11, 2009 1:18 PM

Fuck prop 8.

Posted by: Eep at February 11, 2009 1:20 PM

"Did we need an Indiana Jones 4? No."

I fucking LOVE Bruce Campbell. George is right. He is the King. With a growth on his pecker.

Posted by: boo at February 11, 2009 1:20 PM

Ok, I know she is fucking knock-out, but there is NO WAY in hell M. Pfeiffer looks like that naturally, right???

I mean, if she is naturally aging that way, then I'm taking the MurderTank and going to steal her DNA. Serious.

Oh yeah, and FUCK PROP 8!!!! More like PROP H8TE!!

Posted by: boo at February 11, 2009 1:23 PM

Hey, how 'bout a NSFW warning on the Anna Friel link? Everybody likes a good ol' nipple shot but not when a co-worker could be walking by.

Posted by: Sheri at February 11, 2009 1:24 PM

I don't even watch Grey's anymore, but damn...

o/' ding dong the witch is dead, which old which? skank cancer bitch! ding dong the wicked witch is deaaaaaaaad! o/'

And I thought it was awesome when they had her fucking a ghost. Seriously, you don't fuck with your writers for they will CUT YOU DOWN. Yeaah!

Posted by: figgy at February 11, 2009 1:26 PM

Katherine Heigl and T.R. Knight have finally bitched and moaned their way out of their "Grey's Anatomy" contracts.

Make that two for the ShamWOW! train to Hell.

Posted by: Mike R. at February 11, 2009 1:26 PM

Seriously? I think it should be a law that anyone who voted for Prop 8 should be also be forcibly divorced themselves. If they can't appreciate marriage, they shouldn't be allowed to have it themselves. I'm so angry, I'm gonna go fuck/get fucked/whatever the correct term is by my horse-hung Pajiboyfriend just to rub it in their faces. Break out the Magnums, Hulk, we've got some fucking to do.

Also, the little illustrations from your boyfriends encyclopedia make me giggle to no end. *Snort* Teeheehee!

Posted by: Jeremy Feist at February 11, 2009 1:27 PM

I got to see "Bubba Ho-Tep" at its world premier during the inagural Las Vegas Film Festival (I put that on my resume, BTW). Campbell did a Q & A and it took all my strength not to make sweet, sweet love to the man right there on the floor in front of the (no doubt cheering) crowd.

Posted by: Tracer Bullet at February 11, 2009 1:29 PM

I am so tired of those goddamn flabby stomach ads on the sidebars. Gross. >.

Posted by: twig at February 11, 2009 1:34 PM

Why you gotta go and make me all teary at work for? Jeezy creezy.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at February 11, 2009 1:39 PM

Oh, Dushku's been in Maxim at least once before. Better pictures than the last time, I think.

Tell me that "moustache finger" thing isn't real and that no one anywhere has ever done that.

Posted by: Jay at February 11, 2009 1:42 PM

Godtopus damn you Stacey! That video did break my heart. Now pass the fucking kleenex.

Posted by: tamatha at February 11, 2009 1:42 PM

I'm so angry, I'm gonna go fuck/get fucked/whatever the correct term is by my horse-hung Pajiboyfriend just to rub it in their faces. Break out the Magnums, Hulk, we've got some fucking to do.

Aww, yeah.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at February 11, 2009 1:42 PM

It's a shame that Keanu Reeves had more personality in that one cereal commercial than the rest of his career combined. What was that? A smile?

Posted by: ShannonAnn at February 11, 2009 1:44 PM

Fuck Prop 8 right in the ear. I HATE living in California because this shit passed. Talk about some non-sensical bullshit. Goddamn people are stupid and hateful.

Posted by: BouncingBetty at February 11, 2009 1:49 PM

Hey, koala gets rescued by firefighters.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-XSPx7S4jr4

Little happiness in the middle of that mess.

Posted by: twig at February 11, 2009 1:50 PM

Why doesn't Bruce Campbell have a breakfast cereal? He should totally have a breakfast cereal!! "Chin-e-o's" or something. Probably because it would kick all the other breakfast cereal's ASSES!!!

Posted by: Odnon at February 11, 2009 1:56 PM

Tell me that "moustache finger" thing isn't real and that no one anywhere has ever done that.

I wish I could tell you otherwise, but the so-called "fingerstaches" are real, Jay.

Posted by: branded at February 11, 2009 2:05 PM

Purple and pink colored cereal? Miley Cyrus is racist for leaving out the yellow. Bitch.

/also wishes that someone would describe him as "horse hung"

Posted by: JakesAlterEgo at February 11, 2009 2:06 PM

OK, now that I'm feeling a little less raw, thanks Stacey for posting that, I've passed it along.

Posted by: tamatha at February 11, 2009 2:06 PM

Re: Prop 8.

Eat shit. All of you. Every single one of you that voted for it. I mean, if we really want to boil it down to its essence, here's what all of you did. In the simplest of terms:

You voted against happiness.

Seriously. That's it. That's what you're guilty of, and it's fucking appalling. You actively made a choice to make an entire population unhappy. To ruin what they had or wanted or dreamed of. You might as well have literally stabbed them in the heart.

You voted to cause pain and suffering.

Assholes. All of you.

Everyone, come to Massachusetts! It's all good here, and we decriminalized marijuana as well!

Posted by: TK at February 11, 2009 2:07 PM

Strangely, I don't know any women couples with children, so I don't know if they would be good parents or not. Ha harr!

Posted by: Snath at February 11, 2009 1:08 PM

-------------------------------------------------

I know for a fact that they don't work, one of them is always on her period and the tampon and maxi-pad bills are... STAGGERING.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at February 11, 2009 2:08 PM

TK - I am so with you on that. It is a relief to live in the only state (ok, commonwealth if you're going to get technical) in the union with actual gay marriage.

What I love is that, at first, people had their panties in a twist about the whole thing, and then after a couple of years, they were just like, "Hmm, you know what? The sky hasn't fallen, and Massachusetts hasn't burned to the ground and been swallowed by the sea, perhaps this gay marriage thing isn't such a big deal after all."

If those idiots who supported Prop 8 had just taken a fucking breather, they would have seen that live and let live was a totally fine way to go. Bastards--every last one of 'em.

Posted by: tamatha at February 11, 2009 2:18 PM

the so-called "fingerstaches" are real

That......is the stupidest fucking thing I have ever heard of.

Posted by: Jay at February 11, 2009 2:21 PM

Whatever happened to the "Dude, don't be a douche" rule of thumb? Anyone who voted yes on that piece of shit bill is in complete violation, and should be destroyed.

I'm moving to Massachusetts.

Posted by: BouncingBetty at February 11, 2009 2:23 PM

Everyone, come to Massachusetts! It's all good here, and we decriminalized marijuana as well!

Come for the gay marriage, stay for the coffee.

Posted by: twig at February 11, 2009 2:23 PM

Ummm...I guess my first tattoo is kinda ironic. I was joking with labmates at an Arabidopsis (it's a weed that's used as a genetic model) conference about how into Arabidopsis people were, and I told them they should get an Arabidopsis tattoo. I even drew a little picture of a skull and crossbones ('cause it's a tattoo cliche) with Arabidopsis growing out of its head. At which point they dared me to get the tattoo, and offered to pay if I actually went through with it. My skull also has a cob of corn in its mouth, 'cause that was the other plant we studied in our lab.

Posted by: s. pisaster at February 11, 2009 3:01 PM

You know, there is some irony in the word "NO" being stitched across Anna Friel's chest, because that dress? No. Just no.

Purple and pink colored cereal? Miley Cyrus is racist for leaving out the yellow. Bitch.

Nice one, JakesAlterEgo.

Posted by: Melissa at February 11, 2009 3:03 PM

Fine s. pisaster, make me learn something new--but my information on what Arabidopsis actually is/looks like came from Wikipedia, so who knows how accurate it is.

Posted by: tamatha at February 11, 2009 3:05 PM

I guess my first tattoo is kinda ironic. I was joking with labmates at an Arabidopsis

must ... give ... wedgie ...

Posted by: rikkitikkitavi at February 11, 2009 3:11 PM

I live in 'Bama, where there isn't a snowball's chance in Hell I'll ever be allowed to marry the man I love, but I'll be damned if I won't post that video for everyone I know and love to watch.

It broke my heart a little.

And now I want a baby.

Goddamned biological clock. I feel like Ms. Marissa Tomei right now!

Posted by: The Pink Hulk at February 11, 2009 3:16 PM

Jeremy...

Magnums? Check.
Gun Oil? Check.
Poppers? Check.
Erection? Check.

Houston, we have lift off.

Posted by: The Pink Hulk at February 11, 2009 3:19 PM

"Erection? Check."

/snortle

Posted by: TK at February 11, 2009 3:22 PM

I love Bruce Campbell, but I cannot deal with him getting old. Someone please tell him to stop.

Posted by: frumpiefox at February 11, 2009 4:36 PM

Wait, you mean all this time we've been talking about Katherine Heigl of Gray's Anatomy, and not Katherine Heigl, gym teacher at Gray's Academy of Acting who referred to the passing of each year as a "new season" and was indicted in what the local paper referred to as "Poopergate"?

Whoops, my bad.

Posted by: longcoat000 at February 11, 2009 5:32 PM

Come for the gay marriage, stay for the coffee.
Posted by: twig at February 11, 2009 2:23 PM

Sadly, the coffee is terrible.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at February 11, 2009 7:39 PM

Sadly, the coffee is terrible.

I second this. What is with the Massachusetts' obsession with abysmal Dunkin' Donuts coffee? It's like the Bud Light of coffee: no flavor so that all the people who don't actually like coffee will drink it with a bunch of cream and sugar.

Posted by: stipe42 at February 11, 2009 8:46 PM

That's why all the cool MA kids go to Bess Eaton's................

Posted by: slower lower at February 11, 2009 9:17 PM

God I thought I only cried like this at sad videos when my vagina bled. Damn you Prop 8.

Posted by: Lindsay at February 11, 2009 9:59 PM

See, now there's going to be problems, because you take issue with Dunkin' and there's going to be thousands of howling New Englanders after your ass. The coffee is just...coffee.
And just out of curiosity, how do you retroactively invalidate a marriage that was legal at the time? As someone pointed out, at the end of prohibition, everyone who was arrested for bootlegging wasn't released. It was legal at the time, fuck off. Hasn't Ken Starr fucked up this country enough?

Posted by: MrCreosote at February 11, 2009 10:26 PM

It's like the Bud Light of coffee

Bitch, don't you EVEN make me take off my earrings!!! What in the hell is this magic coffee that YOUR ass is drinkin???

Posted by: Jay at February 11, 2009 10:42 PM

And there it is. The magical moment where Jay's Southern Roots come out.

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at February 12, 2009 12:55 AM

More like the magical moment where Jay starts to channel a Tyler Perry movie.

Posted by: I Love Beets at February 12, 2009 8:32 AM

Well I notice he didn't answer, so I guess I've made my point!

Posted by: Jay at February 12, 2009 8:57 AM

I was so proud to be Canadian when the whole Prop 8 shit was going down but I feel for every person who has to fight to keep their marriage.

It's just so fucking terrible that the happiness of two people can't be looked upon as just that.

Posted by: Wormer at February 12, 2009 10:22 AM

What more can be done about Prop 8? Is anybody part of a group or something? I don't imagine a lonely English voice would do very much but I'm obviously pissed off as hell and wonder about ways to register my AAARGGH. Any thoughts, anyone?

Posted by: Caspar at February 12, 2009 11:05 AM