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February 6, 2009 |

By Stacey Nosek | Pajiba Love | February 6, 2009 |

If Ahnuld is the Governator, what are we going to call Val Kilmer? I know you guys can do better than Governor Batman. Thanks to Ranylt! (MSNBC)

Drew Barrymore can’t get a date, and she thinks it might have something to do with that retarded tongue ring she got from ten years ago. (WIMB)

Hey, y’all! Can we send some Pajiba Love (and some virtual hugs) to dammitjanet, whose newborn grandson needs some prayers to Godtopus. (LGWBA)

Guys do me a favor? Philadelphia is getting its own soccer team, and you can vote to pick out a team name. Problem is, all the names suck and a friend of mine is trying to get people to vote for “Philadelphia Atoms” as a write-in vote. C’mon… I don’t ask for much, and you guys were super cool about helping my sister’s dog get on that calendar that time. (

Some dude robbed a couple of 7-11’s with a sword. And not just any sword, but a sword forged by Kahless the Unforgettable. (QuizLaw)

Aw, man… I was totally just kidding when I said something about Michael Phelps getting his Wheaties box revoked! (Celebitchy)

If you fuck with Malkovich, you fuck with all of us. (AgentBedhead)

The excitement for Zooey Deschanel and Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s 500 Days of Summer has reached fever pitch levels! (FilmExperience)

Here’s a huge helping of Celine Dion’s underpants with a side of rampant misogyny, compliments of Drunken Stepfather! Site NSFW. (DrunkenStepfather)

This is the single worst form of animal abuse I’ve seen since the giant Croc® dog bed. Thanks to Lauren! (PinkCoyote)

Burger King has given birth to sextuplets. And no, it doesn’t have anything to do with that freaky wooden king and his super sperm. (TIB)

Oh Jesus. Supposedly, the reason Dakota Fanning is joining in on the Twilight franchise is because of that Robert Smith-wannabe motherfucker. (Celebslam)

Now you can play Boggle and the — wait for it — internet. And just like that, the comment threads evacuated. Thanks, Catag! (wordsplay)

And on a final note for this week, kimmie is sorry about spoilering “Lost.” OK? You got that? Now LEAVE KIMMIE ALONE!!!

Oh, and here is the Christian Bale remix Gay Alphabet. (I just realized Dustin posted the remix earlier this week. Oops!)

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.

Governor Batman?

Pajiba Love / Stacey Nosek

Pajiba Love | February 6, 2009 |

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