Since it’s Classic Week here at the Paj, and I don’t believe we’ve got any coverage planned for the immediate future, here’s a comprehensive list of Oscar noms. Aaaand, discuss. (Film Experience)
Mel Gibson is going to bring us full-on anal penetration! Well, nothing is written in stone yet. But I had you there for a sec, didn’t I? (WIMB)
Oooh, I’ve got a new idea for a CourtTV TruTV show — Crackheads Caught on Tape: Wascally Winehouses! (Yeeeah!)
The Cloverfield website has been updated with images of the carnage. Also, not that I would know from personal experience or anything, but it starts roaring after a couple of minutes — so make sure you don’t have your sound turned all the way up if you minimize it while you’re talking to a coworker. (1.18.08)
Tom Cruise thinks he’s Batman, and yet that’s the least delusional thing I’ve heard about Tom Cruise today. (Galley Slaves)
Wow. WOW. Some gun fucker tells a Virginia Tech survivor that he would have been been able to protect himself had he been carrying a gun. (Deus Ex Malcontent)
A former McDonalds fry cook is suing Morgan Spurlock for defamation, assumedly for getting passed up as “head fry cook” after the release of the film. (QuizLaw)
Vindication! Kathleen Turner thinks Nicolas Cage is an asshole, and she wasn’t even forced to sit through Ghost Rider. (Celebitchy)
There’s no meltdown quite as beautiful as a Home Shopping Network meltdown. Stick with it ‘til the end for the payoff, after the jump.
There's something going on with your links. The Deus Ex Malcontent link takes me to WIMB. I was looking forward to reading about some crazy motherless fuck about the VA shootings and I get Sarah Michelle Gellar's boobs? Shenanigans!
Posted by: Agent Scully at January 22, 2008 3:52 PM
The Oscars noms definitely surprised me. As much as I don't like her, I thought Keira Knightley was a shoo-in, but I guess not. Same w/ James McAvoy.
Damn, I never thought much of her, but Kathleen Turner is pretty cool.
Posted by: Brie at January 22, 2008 3:53 PM
Whoops, my apologies! That is what's called doing too many things at the same time. Anyway, all fixed!
Thought McAvoy would be nominated too, but I can't complain with Viggo and Javier Bardem on that list. No Ryan Gosling or Josh Brolin? Boo.
Posted by: em at January 22, 2008 4:04 PM
Sorry stacey, but at least on my computer, I still get WIMB instead of aneurysm-inducing gunfucks.
Posted by: ellipsis at January 22, 2008 4:07 PM
Everytime I read something else about Kathleen Turner, it makes me love her more and more.
And the fact that she is awesome enough to have played Chandler's dad on "Friends". For that, I will forever love and respect her. Although I don't necessarily feel that way about "Friends"...
I'm with you Boo, I've loved Kathleen Turner since I was a little girl...I had a strange fascination with Romancing the Stone.
And her voice is (or was) to die for. Pussywillow. Classic.
Posted by: Julie at January 22, 2008 4:16 PM
Question about the video (which was well worth the wait till the end). Who, amongst those who watch things, capture the video and post them online, watches the Home Shopping Network?
Posted by: Brian at January 22, 2008 4:17 PM
I think a deal (not necessarily a big one) ought to be made of the fact that Norbit is up for an Oscar. I know it's just for makeup, but the possibility... the possibility is just too perfect to ignore.
Posted by: Lyra at January 22, 2008 4:20 PM
That Home Shopping meltdown clip reminds me of a flight I was on several years ago, coming home from Dublin. It was the Amsterdam/Minneapolis leg, and one of the flight attendants seriously lost her shit in the middle of the aisle while serving dinner, because an old lady started telling her this huge long story about how her dog (in the cargo bay) needed a vegetarian meal because he didn't believe in "eating his animal brethren." The flight attendant, to her credit, kept it pretty well together until the lady asked her to hold her teeth, at which point the flight attendant laughed until she fell over and the meal cart went careening down the plane aisle.
It's funny anytime someone starts laughing so hard they can't function, but it's twice as funny when it happens to someone whose job is to be kind of robotic most of the time. That's why everyone tries so hard to make the Buckingham Palace guards laugh.
Posted by: Sarina at January 22, 2008 4:23 PM
It's always those crazy old ladies with their pets, ain't it, Sarina?
I think the Oscar noms look pretty solid based on what I've seen and read. I'll have to see Michael Clayton now.
Posted by: Joe at January 22, 2008 4:33 PM
So, should I repeat that I think Ben Foster was screwed? So were J.K. Simmons & Allison Janney.
As for Keira Knightley, I'm of the mindset that her wholly undeserved nomination for Pride & Prejudice should fill her award nomination quota for the next ten years.
Posted by: Kolby at January 22, 2008 4:36 PM
Johnny Depp? Really? For Sweeney Todd?
I love me some Johnny, and I loved Sweeney Todd (more Depp+Rickman duets in the movies please). But Best Acting that was not.
Posted by: kimi at January 22, 2008 4:38 PM
WORD, Kolby. I thought Knightley was serviceable enough in P&P and no more.
Simmons and Janney were so brilliant in Juno that I thought unicorns were going to start raining from the sky. And by unicorns I mean kegs of Guinness.
Posted by: Julie at January 22, 2008 4:45 PM
Oh my GOD guys...Heath Ledger died. No no no.
Posted by: Julie at January 22, 2008 4:51 PM
Heath Ledger. Holy Shit.
Posted by: Agent Scully at January 22, 2008 4:55 PM
What?
Posted by: Kolby at January 22, 2008 4:58 PM
Oh, fuck. It's true, Ledger died. 28 years old. What the hell?
best news all day is that keira knightley got the shaft. love that. i am, obviously, am NOT a fan.
Posted by: citizen_cris at January 22, 2008 5:02 PM
WHAAAAAAT??? Heath Ledger is dead? How? what a waste. He passes away before the world has a chance to see what will quite possibly be his best performance?
Damn. My heart goes out to his little daughter.
Posted by: Alabamapink at January 22, 2008 5:07 PM
Only the first Heath Ledger comment was up, and I was thinking, "Is that supposed to be funny?". After a moment I thought, oh no, what if it's true?
So very sad. I guess with the mentioning of the pills they're hinting at an overdose, but I wouldn't jump the gun yet. I have pills out my yin-yang and they're all legal (ok, just being overly optismistic I know).
Posted by: Stacy at January 22, 2008 5:08 PM
I'm pleased with the Oscar Nominations this year, the right people got nominated so I'm glad. Go Ellen Page and Juno!!!
I have adored him since 10 Things I Hate About You.
Wow...I have no words...
Posted by: Melody at January 22, 2008 5:25 PM
I couldn't even make it to the end of that home shopping video. I'm way too bummed about Heath Ledger. I feel sick. I don't even know what to say.
Posted by: Dangle McGee at January 22, 2008 5:33 PM
Paul Dano was robbed. Ben Foster as well, but especially Paul Dano.
Posted by: Stephanie at January 22, 2008 5:35 PM
Wow! Just saw that Heath Ledger died, on CNN.com. The young ones are dropping like flies. We're not going to have any classic actors for the future if the young ones burn out so fast. So sad.
Posted by: BWeaves at January 22, 2008 5:42 PM
Yeah, I just had to go and wake up my housemates to tell them. It's weird, celebrity news like this has never been affecting in any way for us but this... is kind of horrible and I don't understand exactly why.
How awful.
Plus: I really shouldn't have made the mistake of reading the comments on A Socialite's Life I mean there's snarky and then there's just uncalled for.
Posted by: Alex the Odd at January 22, 2008 5:51 PM
Somewhere out there, there is a woman whose life is so empty that she watches the Home Shopping Network obsessively, thinks the presenters are her friends who will remember what they wanked her into buying ten years ago and asks them to say hello to her "baby" dog on the TV. That, people is the real tragedy. No disrespect to Heath Ledger, but that lady who called the HSN made me really sad.
Posted by: PaddyDog at January 22, 2008 6:43 PM
It's ironic that HL overdoses the same day the Oscar nominations come out. I mean, having to relive all of the buildup to the ceremony that he himself did two years ago. It must have reinforced memories of good times with Michelle Williams and how hard their recent break-up must have been on his fragile nerves. Sad waste of a promising life.
----------
Turner trashing Burt Reynolds & Nic Cage, however, that put the first smile on my face since hearing about Heath today.
Posted by: Matt at January 22, 2008 6:53 PM
Agreed, PaddyDog. Even worse is that she didn't seem to realize that the woman was laughing at HER. She seemed oblivious to that, although I could be wrong, given that it was hard to hear much over the woman losing her shit. The model also looked as though she was barely holding it together.
Posted by: Daphne at January 22, 2008 7:53 PM
As great as Julie Christie was in Away From Her, Gordon Pinsent was so much more and with a less showy role.
It's a shame he's been completely overlooked by everyone.
Posted by: Simon B at January 22, 2008 9:05 PM
I think it was actually the DListed guy. That's where I came across the clip, anyway!
Why the hell is he watching HSN and recording it?
Posted by: Brian at January 22, 2008 9:08 PM
I can't even get worked up about Oscar nominations anymore. It's hard to believe anyone can. The only one this year that irritates me, even a little, is Surf's Up getting nominated instead of Paprika.
Goodbye, Heath.
Posted by: Todd at January 23, 2008 8:02 AM
Daphne: You're right. She had no clue that woman was laughing at her. I really wanted to laugh at that clip. It was genuinely funny in one way, but about half way through as I listened, this sadness just crept in. Glad it wasn't just me. We wouldn't want the Pajibaverse thinking I had gone soft.
Posted by: PaddyDog at January 23, 2008 9:33 AM
Kathleen Turner has nothing left to lose, film career-wise. Is anyone surprised by her descriptions of Anthony Perkins (all that closeted gay self-hatred has to go _somewhere_), Nic Cage and Burt Reynolds? Me neither.
As for the gun nuts claiming arming students = prevention of Va Tech tragedy--the reality would be closer to a sick version of Three Stooges. I imagine that once Cho opened fire in a classroom, people in next rooms would run out (playing Rambo), see others with a gun in hand, and shoot each _other_.
Posted by: True_Blue at January 23, 2008 1:23 PM
Ah, the has-been asshat that is Burt Reynolds: "I've never taken second billing to a woman."
How about a punch from one?
Posted by: numchuck at January 23, 2008 2:55 PM
Bless that Va Tech survivor for displaying the restraint most of us would not have when confronted with such a jerkoff.
Gun-nuts live in a fantasy world. They really think that you have to be armed at ALL TIMES just in case a "bad guy" tries to shoot you. And I guarantee that they imagine all "bad guys" as immigrants or minorities.
I got into an argument with a pro-gun friend of a friend after the Va Tech incident. He was all blah, blah, if someone in the classroom had a gun, they would have taken that mofo down, blah. I said guns don't work like in the movies; you are more likely to miss your target and hit an innocent bystander.
We were in a bar at the time, so he said, "Wouldn't you feel safer in here knowing that you could defend yourself if you had to?"
I said, "I would feel safer if I could go to a bar knowing someone was not packing heat!"
There's something going on with your links. The Deus Ex Malcontent link takes me to WIMB. I was looking forward to reading about some crazy motherless fuck about the VA shootings and I get Sarah Michelle Gellar's boobs? Shenanigans!