Pajiba Love 01/18/10

Now It's Billy Bush's Time to Shine!

By Stacey Nosek | Posted Under Pajiba Love | Comments (33)

Last night’s Golden Globes were maybe the most entertaining awards show I’ve ever seen thanks to Ricky Gervais not giving a flying crap about those people or their fancy awards show. But not to be overlooked was Billy Bush’s coverage for “Access Hollywood,” which provided some of the most unintentionally funny moments of the night. (Film Drunk)

Here’s a handy guide to internet argument techniques, which may or may not come in handy for your next Pajiba comment thread flame war. Thanks to Shadows of Dakaron! (Cracked)

Jennifer Aniston and Gerard Butler were looking mighty cozy at the Globes last night, so let the rampant speculation about Jennifer Ansiton’s love life start … NOW! (Celebitchy)

Check out this footage of Jay Leno’s shit-eating, Smuggy McSmuggerson 2004 announcement that he was turning “The Tonight Show” over to Conan O’Brien. (Warming Glow)

So yeah, it’s a really, really really slow news day. So much so that Paris Hilton’s new website is news. I do not, however, encourage you to “go” there. (IBBB)

Necco has completely rebranded and changed the recipe for the sweetheart conversation hearts. This disappoints me. Am I the only one who liked those things the way they were? Via TIB. (Candyblog)

Huh. A bunch of photos from the A-Team movie have made their way online, and they are how shall we say — underwhelming. (Screen Junkies)

And while we’re at it, let’s take a look at an unofficially leaked photo from Predators, as well. (The Playlist)

J.J. Abrams has provided what is possibly the most vague news ever of a Cloverfield sequel. I finally just caught that movie a few weeks ago, and you know, I was surprised how much I actually enjoyed it. (Bloody Disgusting)

Here’s a quiz about ABC’s block of family-friendly Friday night programming in the ’90s known as TGIF. I only got 6 out of 12, so I expect most of you will do better than I did. (mental floss)

Here are a bunch of facts about video games in handy chart form. (Unreality)

Those of you who watched last week’s premiere of “American Idol” may have caught an impassioned performance of the new classic “Pants on the Ground.” So, it was only inevitable that this happened:

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.

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Comments

"Pants on the Ground" has all the staying power of balloon boy and all the charm of the video of the slaughterhouses on the right of this page.

Posted by: John Denver's Wingman at January 18, 2010 1:24 PM

That Leno clip is amaaaaazing. He is now responsible for everything he claimed he wanted to avoid. The only good that comes of this is that everyone now knows what a backstabbing brown-nosing douche he really is. Not that I had any doubts.

Posted by: Edith at January 18, 2010 1:24 PM

NECCO - for shame! The chalky goodness of Conversation Hearts is half the fun of Valentine's Day.

Posted by: samantha t at January 18, 2010 1:24 PM

The Pants on the Ground phenomenon was funny for all of one viewing. It's more than run its course. It's trampling all over my First Amendment rights, and I pity every last one of you who could possibly like something like that.

I'm sorry about that last statement. I'm so sorry that you're all a bunhc of retarded sheep who kiss AI's ass and fawn over Simon. I will try to lower my standards enough to be able to enjoy what the rest of you enjoy so that you'll like me.

Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at January 18, 2010 1:26 PM

Yeah, you tell em, SoD! You're so awesome, I wish I was as over-educated as you!

Posted by: Dakaron's Shadow at January 18, 2010 1:28 PM

Thank you for that Cracked article. I will now rename myself Cocktpus, and all will be well.

Am I the only one who liked those things the way they were?
Yes.

Posted by: cocktapus, formerly Patty O'Green at January 18, 2010 1:32 PM

Godtopus, SoD, you're such a chicken portion.

Posted by: Katers at January 18, 2010 1:35 PM

What the hell's wrong with the A-Team pictures?

Posted by: Jay at January 18, 2010 1:44 PM

I only got 8/12 on the TGIF quiz, but I did hit that original line-up question out of the park because my friend and I drunk-o-pedia-ed it one night.

Posted by: coveredinbees at January 18, 2010 2:28 PM

I scored 7 out of ten on the TGIF quiz, despite never having actually, you know, WATCHED the damn shows. I am your benchmark.

Posted by: Jeremy Feist at January 18, 2010 2:38 PM

Hmmm but what did you do with the other two questions on the quiz, Jeremy? Stuff them down the back of the sofa?

P.S. sidebar, PACEY IS ALIVE AND WELL, BITCHES, AND HOLDING DIANE KRUEGER'S UMBRELLA (if you know what I mean). SO SUCK IT. http://gofugyourself.celebuzz.com/go_fug_yourself/2010/01/golden_globes_fug-or-fab_carpe_1.html

Posted by: coveredinbees at January 18, 2010 2:43 PM

My wife taught my daughter to sing "Pants on the Ground." Now she walks around saying "Lookin like a foo."

I only got 3/12 on that TGIF quiz. I clearly did not watch enough TV when I was younger.

Posted by: Snath at January 18, 2010 3:27 PM

How is it EVEN POSSIBLE that wearing George Peppard's hair and with a fat stoge hanging off his lip, Neeson STILL manages to be ridiculously hot?!

Also, Necco, YOU BASTARDS! Why they always gotta be changin' shit that don't need changin'?!

Posted by: Anna von Beaverpuppet at January 18, 2010 3:40 PM

Hm, 10/12 on the TGIF quiz. Which is fascinating to me, as at least 5 of those were correct on pure guesswork. I guess it's true about always going with your first instincts.

In semi-related news, I only got 8/15 on the "Troy McClure Film or Actual Terrible Movie" quiz. That fucker was HARD.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverpuppet at January 18, 2010 4:04 PM

I had an idea for a Valentine candy hearts knockoff called Spleens. Instead of being many colors, they'd all be an angry bruised purple and they'd aay things like "Get lost" and "Piss off" and "Bite me" and "Up yours." They would be used like a Breakup Monkey, and if you Google a picture of a spleen, it conveniently looks like a fist. Plus they'd (of course) be sour.

All I lack is a copyright and about $5 million in start-up money. If you can offer these things, I'll cut you in for 5% of the profits for all eternity.

Think about it.

And WHY the FUCK does the fucking "Remember personal info" box only remember my personal info about half the time?

Posted by: , at January 18, 2010 4:45 PM

There's no way you'd need $5 million to start that shit up. $1 million, tops. Somebody who reads Pajiba's gotta be good for a mil, right?

...Right?

Posted by: MM at January 18, 2010 5:14 PM

AvB, I got 13 out of 15 with the Troy McClure quiz. But I got my ass handed to me on TGIF. Takes all kinds (of nerds), I guess.

Posted by: welldressed at January 18, 2010 5:26 PM

MM,

Shhhhh ... $1 mil is for start-up, $3.9 mil is for hookers and blow. The rest I'll probably waste.

Posted by: , at January 18, 2010 5:26 PM

I think I was the only person that enjoyed that movie (cloverfield) when it came out. Everyone else was all "it makes me sick with the shaky cam" but I think I'm immune to that curse as Cloverfield, Paranormal, District 9 and Blair Witch all didnt give me even the slightest motion sickness.

Posted by: aroorda at January 18, 2010 5:35 PM

$1 mil is for start-up, $3.9 mil is for hookers and blow.

That formula seems to work pretty well in Hollywood, so you should be rich in no time. And even though we'll hate you, and shake our fists at you and say, "God I hate these stupid fucking candies, with the ads *everywhere*, and the stupid "hip" sayings, not to mention they taste like ASS..."

But you'll be laughing all the way to the bank.

Posted by: MM at January 18, 2010 5:41 PM

Candy hearts were the greatest candy on earth! You've got to hand it to a company that can make eighteen varieties of chalk candy marketable for over 150 years. When I was a kid, we used to pretend the Necco wafers were communion wafers. Hey! We were bored Catholic kids in the upper midwest in the 1970's.

Best quote from the Leno clip: "I never wanna see anybody have to go through that again" (referencing the bullshit that was the early 90's brouhaha with Letterman.)

Posted by: Johnnyboy at January 18, 2010 6:06 PM

P.S. If they made "candy spleens" I would buy them!

Posted by: Johnnyboy at January 18, 2010 6:07 PM

8 out of 12 on the quiz Bitches!

Wait. That reveals that I actually watched some of these shows. I will admit to Perfect Strangers and Dinosaurs. The rest was PURE guesswork.

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at January 18, 2010 6:27 PM

Only 3.9mil for hookers and blow Big Daddy? What, you slowing down in your old age?

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at January 18, 2010 6:43 PM

Check out this footage of Jay Leno’s shit-eating, Smuggy McSmuggerson 2004 announcement that he was turning “The Tonight Show” over to Conan O’Brien.

Leno should be tied up and made to watch that over and over.

Posted by: EricD at January 18, 2010 8:16 PM

So just to be clear.... It wasn't enought for Nosek to give you the nod for submitting site, you had demonstrate your comprehensive grasp of the bit in a comment here as well? Above and beyond cheif, above and beyond.

Posted by: Jack Random at January 19, 2010 12:22 AM

No that wasn't an an attempt to use any of those rules to congratulate you in an aroundabout way, you're just a twat.

Posted by: Jack Random at January 19, 2010 12:25 AM

Also, you're gay

Posted by: Jack Random at January 19, 2010 12:29 AM

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at January 18, 2010 6:43 PM
---
That's if I get only $5 mil, luv. Don't worry, I'll cut you in on a nice chunk of the $3.9 mil. Ummm ... do you fall under "hookers" or "blow"?

Posted by: , at January 19, 2010 1:51 AM

Big Daddy, for the right chunk of that I'll hook AND blow whatever you got. Hell, I'll bring dinner. Like I told the BF in a 'Step up or step off' conversation tonight:
If I'm going to be the Home Pussy Delivery System I might as well get PAID.
Color me surprised, he chose 'Step Up'.

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at January 19, 2010 4:40 AM

Is HPDS available in my neighborhood, or am I outside the delivery area? If so, can I do pick-up? Sorry to make you sound like a pizza.

Posted by: , at January 19, 2010 10:51 AM

I've been called worse.

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at January 19, 2010 12:43 PM

Jack Random...I hereby challenge you to a duel. Meet me outside the building in ten minutes. Make sure I know who you are by wearing a blue dress and a tampon wig. The dueling circle consists of middle of the intersection during rush hour traffic. I'll see you there.

Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at January 19, 2010 1:30 PM

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Now It's Billy Bush's Time to Shine!

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