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Oh, Great, America's Favorite Pig Is Going To Get Roasted. LUAU!

By Joanna Robinson | Pajiba Love | July 5, 2011 |


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Did you make it through the firecrackin' weekend, my rambunctious revelers? (You New Yorkers got one HELLUVA view.) Every digit attached? Each expressive eyebrow unsinged? Good, you're going to need them. I know my brows furrowed when I heard Charlie Sheen was going to be the subject of this year's Comedy Central Roast. This is usually Courtney's area of expertise but let me just say that first of all I love much of Charlie Sheen's early work (this is where I would like to mention Platoon but, if I'm being honest, should admit my affection for Men At Work). Secondly, the man has become a total sh*t****. Thirdly, it's very sad that said sh*t****-ing is a result of some substance abuse problems and, lastly, I was REALLY REALLY hoping he was on his way off of my cultural radar. So, f*ck you, Comedy Central, for dragging this sh*t back up. F*ck you for making a bunch of humoredians trot out tired, worn-out, sad sad sad Charlie Sheen jokes. I am in hate with this idea. (NYT)

I am, however, in love with the idea of Cockneys vs. Zombies, which is currently being filmed. I have such a lady crush on Michelle Ryan and want the tagline to be "Chav at thee!" Thanks for the heads up, zomgmouse. (Daily Mail)

I'd also like to see a flick about magical rappers who fight crime. . .or something. Here's some inspiration, young screenwriters. (Magical Rappers)

Speaking of tumblrs that made me smile (like I'm ALIVE inside), this one did the trick. (Smile Like You're Dead Inside)

This, however? This made me laugh out loud. Not to oversell it or anything, but it's a well-played tweet from Newt Gingrich. . .or, more likely, a member of his staff. (Blame It On The Voices)

In other political/twitter news, Cher took on Michelle Bachmann's husband and his position on LGBT issues. Come for the Cher tweetspeak, stay for the most iconically gay threat I've ever seen. (Towelroad)

(This might be my favorite transitions in the history of transitions.) SPEAKING OF FRIENDS OF DOROTHY, Dave Navarro got an awesome Wizard of Oz tattoo inked on his right boob. I say awesome, you say dorky. Whatever, that movie was my jam when I was little. I had a stuffed Toto that I carried around. Haters to the left. (Evil Beet)

I think these typographical cities would make lovely tattoos. Well, except for the inevitable Nice/nice confusion. (Design Lov)

Or maybe you want to ink one of the these Star Wars/metal band logos on yourself. Aaaand now I'm considering opening up a parlor called "Tatooine." (Castle Pop)

Oh don't lie, you'd totally come into my geeky tattoo parlor, little flies. Speaking of insects, I don't fancy them, generally, (I lived with two entomologists in college and our freezer was jammed full of specimen jars), but this bug-based art is undeniably cool. (io9)

While this laptop case masquerading as a book isn't undeniably cool (borderline hipstersmug), I do covet it. (Amazon)

Speaking of books, I blame Twilight for this recent movie development (and for everything that is wrong in this world. . .forever). They're splitting the Kristen Stewart Snow White film into THREE FILMS. So, you know, look forward to years of angsty photoshopped posters featuring her dead eyes and Thor's bare, rippling chest. Oh, and all the Evanescence you can handle. (CinemaBlend)

If that Snow White news is the cheese course, then this "Party Down" link is your tart and acidic palate cleanser. So, here, a moderately NSFW round up of images and quotes from one of my favorite series in the past decade. (Uproxx)

And here's a sweet little dessert for you, my voracious vixens. It's a little animated short (one of my favorite mediums) and it's pretty f*cking cute.

Defective Detective from Cartoon Brew on Vimeo.

Finally, this link would be the sh*tty microwave burrito you make at 3AM after stumbling home from the bars. I mean, it's great, don't get me wrong, but it involves Chumbawumba. So. . .you know. . .that happened. Here's They Might Be Giants covering "Tubthumping" for the Onion's fantastic Undercover series.

They Might Be Giants covers Chumbawamba

Joanna Robinson purchased the CD "Tubthumper" when she was in high school. It is the inspiration for her current album-purchasing philosophy which is "Never Buy Unless You Already Love Three Tracks."


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