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Look! Puppies! And Ryan Reynolds! Puppies and Ryan Reynolds and Zero Sad Stories!!

By Joanna Robinson | Posted Under Pajiba Love | Comments (30)



Ryan-Reynolds-dog.jpeg

Hello my lovelies, have we adequately healed from yesterday’s Sad Spackle onslaught? Does the that image of a Pajiban Golden Boy cradling a puppy get us there? How about a Pajiban Dream Girl too? Here, my little wounded sparrows.

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Better? Good. You know what else Pajibans love? Heart-warming human interest stories about scrappy folk heroes like, you know, Robocop. Stay classy, Detroit. (Yahoo)

In actual heroes who actually deserve an actual statue news, some of the cast of “Band of Brothers” (get on board, Damien Lewis) will be parachute jumping to raise money for a monument to the late Maj. Dick Winters in Normandy. Number one on the list of jumpers? My friend’s Uncle Mike. GO, UNCLE MIKE! (Jumping For Heroes)

My new personal hero? Ken Jennings, the modern-day John Henry. (Imgur)

Sure, the computer may have won “Jeopardy!” but could a machine build THIS??! Well, probably. (Laughing Squid)

But could they build a bacon rocket? No, they couldn’t, ‘cause building a bacon rocket is stupid, pointless and dangerous. But you know what, my crispy strips of science? It’s also awesome. TEAM HUMAN! (Youtube)

Speaking of an overlord I wouldn’t kick out of bed, here is Felicia Day on Jimmy Fallon last night. That’s right, you can see the elf ears in action. She throws daggers too! (Tubefilter)

I think the thing keeping me from being batsh*t insane about Day’s new project is the fact the this Link Wench does not play video games. Of any sort. Then again, that didn’t stop me from going batsh*t insane for this trailer for “Dead Island” (a new zombie-based video game). There’s a lot of CGI violence, folks, but there’s also, like, hella pathos. And a “Lost” homage! (Geekologie)

Then again, I’m a sucker for island vacations gone horribly awry. I’ll give you one guess as to which of these “Done in 60 Seconds” films I liked the most. Did you guess the one with the dinosaurs? You clever girl. (Empire Online)

Have you ever wondered what to wear with your formal figure-skating outfit? The answer is, of course, Joshua Jackson (RIP). Pacey really pulls an outfit together. Warning, if you’re still smarting from yesterday, there is a photo (just a photo) of Liam Neeson on this page. But if you make it past him without tears, you shall be rewarded with Robert Downey Jr. in a sweater vest. Also, I really dislike January Jones. Have I mentioned? (Celebitchy)

I’ve been posting a lot of articles about the various protests and regime-topplings going on around the word. Hey, even Wisconsin has one! Here’s a handy wiki to keep track of what’s going, Arab-etically speaking. (Wikipedia)

Is it twisted that I find this Dexter-themed Valentine’s dinner oddly romantical? I’ve seen “Dexter!” A lot of work goes into laying down that plastic sheeting! Now, a Dexter-themed bath, on the other hand…there’s no way I’m getting in that tub. (Unreality)

I’ll tell you what, my nebulous oort clouds (almost a word cloud!), my first thought when seeing this cutesy artistic rendering of our solar system was “Neptune looks a little special needs,” my second was “man oh man, I miss Pluto” and my third was “what mnemonic device do the school children learn nowadays? My Very Excellent Mother Just Sent Us Nine… WHAT? NINE WHAT? IT’S A WHOLE GENERATION HINGING ON A SENTENCE FRAGMENT!” (Flickr)

Speaking of science and space, here’s another beautiful and meditative Carl Sagan video. Thanks to the wakeful for bringing it to my attention.

But we’ll close today with a little more Puppy Love. So, thanks to Lauren, here’s your first Link Wench approved Puppy video. She entrapped me with the adorable dalek robot. I was helpless to resist. Ex-Ter-Mi-Nate!

Joanna Robinson is singing “bacon and rockets, together at last, it’s really really tasty and it goes really fast!” Send your bacon rockets to godtopuswept@gmail.com or follow her and her wayward puns on Twitter @quityourJRob









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Comments

I actually love the dress on JanJones.

I don't like those shoes with it, or her hair, her makeup, or her face. But I love the dress.

Posted by: Anna von Beav at February 17, 2011 1:21 PM

Yessssss, Joanna, come to the cute side! We have baby otters, penguins, kitties . . . come to the cute side . . . accept your destiny . . .

Posted by: Lauren at February 17, 2011 1:27 PM

I actually love the dress on JanJones.

Don't drive, you're drunk.

Posted by: Jay at February 17, 2011 1:35 PM

Let me re-phrase:

I love the dress that JanJones is wearing.

Posted by: Anna von Beav at February 17, 2011 1:37 PM

I repeat...

Posted by: Jay at February 17, 2011 1:40 PM

We should start stocking booze for the Oscar chat.

Posted by: Jay at February 17, 2011 1:42 PM

JAY. She has an ENTIRE GOLDEN SPARKLY BEADED BOOB. And some crazy semi-military-style half-apron bib thing. What's not to love?!

Posted by: Anna von Beav at February 17, 2011 1:43 PM

OMG, RDJ in a sweater-vest. My day, she is made.

Posted by: Samantha at February 17, 2011 1:47 PM

I know at least one third grade teacher who now uses

My Very Educated Mother Just Served Us...Nothing!

Posted by: Chucklehouse at February 17, 2011 1:49 PM

I'm with Von Beav. That's one fabulous dress.

However, my question is: you have a movie premiere with real honest-to-God stars. Neeson. RDJ. Jan Jones, etc. How does the Kardashian species get an invite to this? I understand all those perfume launches and PR events for charities no-one has ever heard of but if you can easily attract top talent to your premiere, why dilute the gene pool with the mutant side?

Posted by: PaddyDog at February 17, 2011 1:50 PM

Zero sadness? psh. I had a tiny lump in my throat after watching the Dead Island trailer.

Posted by: thatsjesstastic! at February 17, 2011 1:51 PM

Screech Powers invented the word MVEMJSUNP and I have never forgotten the order of the planets since. You're right though, because MVEMJSUN just sounds silly.

For as much shit as my roommate and I were talking on Ken Jennings, I've got to hand it to him for having a pretty good game yesterday. Had he wagered it all and the computer gotten the last question wrong I think he could have pulled it off (I didn't look that closely at the scores), but a fairly timid wager and a funny Simpsons quote were a suitable alternative.

Posted by: L4NkYb at February 17, 2011 1:52 PM

I'm so psyched about that Robocop statue!

Everytime my contempt for humanity has me on the precipice of a descent into a homicidal rage, the likes of which modern civilization has never seen, I stumble upon a story like this that reminds me of the glory of human endeavours!

Puppys help too!

Posted by: Murderbot at February 17, 2011 2:03 PM

I ONLY JUST READ YESTERDAYS PAJIBA LOVE AND MY NEESON PAIN IS FRESH AND DEEP!

Oh god, he's so wonderful and sad and he needs a HUG.

Posted by: Nadine at February 17, 2011 2:07 PM

Pluto is still a planet...

...and I'm going to my grave with that belief.

Posted by: OldSchool60 at February 17, 2011 2:26 PM

Oort Cloud!

Posted by: MM at February 17, 2011 2:40 PM

I find this Dexter-themed Valentine’s dinner oddly romantical

But is it bedroomantical?!?

MVEMJUSN
My Velociraptor, Eduardo, Might Just Slice Us Now
Move! Volcano Erupting! Maybe Jesus Saw Us Naked!
Make Very Equine Movements: Jab, Stomp, Urinate, Neigh!

Posted by: Patty O'Green at February 17, 2011 2:42 PM

Move! Volcano Erupting! Maybe Jesus Saw Us Naked!

YES. Patty wins.

Posted by: Anna von Beav at February 17, 2011 3:17 PM

Coming in 2012: Ryan Reynolds and Puppies!

One day down on his luck actor Ryan Reynolds gets a telegram informing him his beloved grandmother has passed away and furthermore he finds out that she left him her puppy orphanage. When he arrives at his newly inherited building he finds out that an evil international conglomerate wants to buy the land and tear down the orphanage so they can build a Big-mart. They offer him a large sum of money which would set him for life but what would his grandmother (played in flashbacks by Betty White of course) say?

To complicate matters even more he starts to fall in love with the evil Big-mart CEO played to perfection by Katherine Heigl. Directed by Brett Ratner.

Posted by: John W at February 17, 2011 3:24 PM

Even better than Felicia Day on Fallon last night was the musical guest.

Particularly when Felicia Day interacts with said musical guest.

And especially when Mos Def goes insane for said musical guest.

Posted by: ChristianH at February 17, 2011 3:53 PM

My Very Excellent Mother Just Sent Us NOTHING. NOTHING. BECAUSE LIFE IS A BITCH. Just ask Pluto. Poor Pluto.

Posted by: Figgy at February 17, 2011 3:59 PM

SPAAAAAACE

Posted by: The_wakeful at February 17, 2011 4:15 PM

Dalek: I was just accost-ed by a dog!

Dalek's Wife: What did you do?

Dalek: I ex-ter-min-at-ed it!

Dalek's Wife: Oh? That's too bad.

Dalek: Put it in the cur-ry!

Posted by: The Wanderer at February 17, 2011 4:37 PM

Poor Mickey Mouse. Pluto doesn't exist.

Posted by: Odnon. at February 17, 2011 4:50 PM

My Very Excellent Mother Just Sucked Uncle Ned.
...once again, awkward childhood.

Posted by: Jim Doggie at February 17, 2011 5:18 PM

Is it wrong that when I read this post, I hear Sarah McLaughlin singing to me?

Posted by: juiceinla at February 17, 2011 6:19 PM

There nothing funnier than dogs vs robots.

Posted by: John W at February 17, 2011 9:38 PM

I've been following this robocep statue debacle for a bit now. I am so incredibly happy they got the fan funding together for this. It makes me wanna dance.

Posted by: Blank at February 18, 2011 11:45 AM

Don't "miss" Pluto--join the many astronomers and lay people around the world who reject the demotion. Only 4 percent of the IAU voted on this, and most are not planetary scientists. Their decision was opposed in a formal petition by hundreds of professional astronomers led by New Horizons Principal Investigator Dr. Alan Stern. These astronomers favor a broader planet definition in which any object that orbits a star, isn't a star itself, and is large enough to be pulled into a round shape by its own gravity is considered a planet. Pluto meets this criteria, as do several additional objects such as Ceres, Haumea, Makemake, Eris, and Sedna. Mnemonics aren't important, and neither is memorization. It's far more important to understand the different types of planets in our solar system. Dwarf planets are simply a third class of planets in addition to terrestrials and jovians, in spite of the vote by four percent of the IAU.

Posted by: Laurel Kornfeld at February 18, 2011 3:06 PM

Screech Powers invented the word MVEMJSUNP and I have never forgotten the order of the planets since.

ME TOO. I think of this every single time.

Posted by: Even Stevens at February 19, 2011 2:27 AM