Lock Your Cubicle Door For The 10 Sexiest Films Ever Made

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Lock Your Cubicle Door For The 10 Sexiest Films Ever Made

By Joanna Robinson | Pajiba Love | August 7, 2012 | Comments ()


Just kidding, I know your cubes don't have doors. Well this link is totally SFW as long as you don't watch any of the videos. By the by, sweet sax-y-phone molassy, why have I never watched Body Heat? That thing looks like a sweaty, cheesy mess. Yes please. (FlavorWire)

Speaking of steam heat, it looks like American Psycho author Bret Easton Ellis won't be adapting "50 Shades of Grey," which is sort of sad because he wanted to SO BADLY. (Vulture)

Speaking of fine literature (we weren't, but oh well), did you ever have to read Thomas Hardy in school? Oh, or are you one of those types who reads Hardy for fun? Ooooof. You must be fun at parties. Anyway, the bleak Yorkshireman once spearheaded an art project that integrated headstones into a massive tree. So he's always been a downer. Anyway, the tree turned out rather gorgeous and is still there today. (Kuriositas)

Rachel Weisz confesses in a recent interview that she's delighted being married to Daniel Craig. Yeah, I expect there are no complaints from Daniel Craig either. (Celebitchy)

Unreality has a list of films with brilliant premises that fell short of the mark. Ahhhhh, yes, and I can tell you exactly how In Time fell short...by not bringing even the tiniest shred of sexyback. That's how. (Unreality)

Composer (A Chorus Line among others) and EGOT winner Marvin Hamlisch passed away. Doff your sparkliest bowler in his memory. (NYT)

In today's Olympic news, check out the evolution of "the vault" as represented by this single gif. (BioTV)

The Film Experience asks "Who Is Your Cinematic Avatar?" My answer, as many of you know, is hopelessly dorky. I'd be curious to know yours. (TFE)

This poster for a fake Inspector Spacetime film (as opposed to the totally real "Inspector Spacetime" show) is almost perfect. I just wish they had made the ladies a little more "New Who" and a little less Barbarella. They totally Britta'd Britta's crotch is what I'm saying. (io9)

Fantastic print of The New York Giants. Nooooo, not the sports team. The movie giants. Don't worry, that one in the bottom corner is okay. He's a sailor...in New York. We get this guy laid, we won't have any trouble. (Laughing Squid)

Finally a fun list of the weird cross-over links between seemingly unrelated TV universes. Mostly JJ Abrams is to blame. (AV Club)

Joanna Robinson would kill for an Apollo bar right now...or an hour alone with Eva Green.

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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • Elfrieda

    I love Thomas Hardy even more now. You mean you don't read TH for fun? I pity the fool . . .

  • AudioSuede

    BTW, I desperately want my cinematic avatar to be Patrick Fugit in Almost Famous, but I'll be lucky if I end up as John Cusack in High Fidelity. In the meantime, I'll be busy living like Bill Hader in Forgetting Sarah Marshall (minus the money).

  • AudioSuede

    EGOT winner Marvin Hamlisch passed away.

    Aw :(


  • Clancys_Daddy

    Show me a beautiful woman and I will show you a man who is tired of her shit. Fortunately for Rachel I can take an awful lot before I would get tired of her.

  • They also Britta'd the villains. Those are Daleks, not Blorgons.

  • ,

    *opens link, "Better see 'Bound' here." Sees "Bound." Decides rest of list is immaterial*

  • Erin S

    Tracy Flick is undoubtedly my cinematic avatar. Whenever I watched Election with others I was baffled as to why no one else even had a shred of sympathy for her. That scene where she's lying in bed crying and her mom is like "Maybe if you had taken my suggestions..." Oof. Been there, Tracy.

  • funkyfacecat

    Thomas Hardy was from bleakest Dorset. Far from the Madding Crowd is kind of fun, in places.

  • causaubon

    i've said it before, and i'll say it again....

    the Catherine Deneuve/Susan Sarandon sex scene in The Hunger is the sexiest moment on film. with Delibes' "Viens, Malika" duet from Lakmé...

    it doesn't get any hotter than that.

  • BierceAmbrose


  • What's so bad about Thomas Hardy? Other than the crippling depression that follows reading one of his novels, of course.

  • TheOriginalMRod

    2 cinematic avatars, usually Myrna Loy as Nora Charles. But also Dorothy Malone in The Big Sleep. They both like booze, and try to keep up with their male counterparts. My poor liver.

  • VioletKiller

    True story - a viewing of (and exam featuring!) Body Heat formed part of my first year film studies class.

  • Fernando de Markup

    Two of Jennifer Connelly's movies should be on here. The first one is Mulholland Falls where she plays a hooker opposite Nick Nolte's ruthless antimob cop. Nolte's in flagrante with her in a couple of shots and he's not that good of an actor, if you know what I mean. The other one was The Hot Spot with Don Johnson with the late Dennis Hopper directing. The intensity of the performances made me think that he wasn't acting.either. Jennifer Connelly's stunning teen aged body deserved its own Oscar too. I'll be picking those up on BluRay when they're released.

  • RJ

    I'll trade you one Mulholland Falls for one Waking the Dead. She and Billy Crudup have some insane chemistry (loved them in Inventing the Abbotts as well), but WtD is such a haunting yet romantic movie, without a bit of corniness.

  • Every single picture in this post made me tingle down there.

  • Muhnah_Muhnah

    Oh Christ...first Eva Green, then I click on the link and I get Rachel Weisz...oh Joanna, you just like to make me happy, don't you?

    And yes, I read Hardy for fun. You're so not getting invited to my weekend orgies with Eva and Rachel. And Carla Gugino. Who's a downer now?

  • Maguita NYC

    That 10 sexiest movie scenes is missing one of the hottest scenes ever from the movie The Lover (based on Marguerite Duras' book).

  • John G.

    Body Heat is great, because it's a 1940's film noir, but it's set in the early 1980's. Lawrence Kasdan plays with the different mores of the different decades in creative and comical ways.

  • Other Brian

    Thank you, Pajiba, for eluding me to the hate-crime that is tacking Gillian Jacobs head onto Kaley Cuoco's body. It's like the opposite of that joking thing fat men do with their Facebook profile pictures.

    God I fucking hate Big Bang Theory.

  • laylaness

    Look, after he did the script for the awful "film" adaptation of The Rules of Attraction, I feel I can dismiss Bret Easton Ellis with an eyeroll and a smirk, even if I love Less Than Zero so so so so so much (book and movie).

    Also, I read the first 4 pages of 50 Shades of Grey and it is the most godawful prose on the planet. Even James Franco writes better. You can *tell* it's fanfic, for godtopus's sake. I wish the housewives who are gobbling up the series would admit that it's not literature of any kind, but instead a Harlequin Romance on Viagra. I'm no Twilight defender, but at least Stephenie Meyer knew her target audience is made up of third graders. GOD.

  • Maguita NYC

    Of 50 Shades of Shits, have you read this review? It was on one of the links on Pajiba a few weeks ago.

    Proper warning: Be close to a bathroom when you read it... I almost peed my pants. Literally.


  • Kala

    That review damn near killed me. I was trying not to wake up someone sleeping in the next room, and I had no clue I could snort that loudly. My lady-like powers are weak.

  • Maguita NYC

    Whenever I feel blue, I just imagine that tampon excerpt combined with the Prince gif.... Just him passing by, and hen giving the disturbed look...

  • laylaness

    The Prince .gif makes it.

  • Anne Lucchesi

    I read the reviews of all three of those "books" and am now totally pleased about having done that instead of reading ANY of the actual "books" themselves. That reviewer is hilarious!

  • tamatha_uhmelmahaye

    My cube has a door! And it locks.
    So yeah, what I'm saying is that I'm special.

  • TheOtherGreg

    My Cinematic Avatar:

  • Bert_McGurt

    That's what you said yesterday.

  • John G.

    don't drive angry

  • Lucas

    My cinematic doppelgänger might be Freddie Highmore in Finding Neverland.

  • John W

    Rachel is delighted to be married to Daniel.

    Ever notice that when celebrities declare how great they're spouse/boy/girlfriend is, they usually break up shortly thereafter?

  • Maguita NYC

    The dude has a temper, and she looks like she doesn't take kindly to bullshit. Theirs is one of those relationships where I believe the two should have tried living together first.

    I find her too hot for him, she needs to be with a cute geek who'll impress her mind, while cherishing the ground she walks on. She is that deserving of a goddess.

  • Is there a temper story out there I don't know about? I don't get a that from him. I get a private and doesn't suffer fools gladly vibe very strongly though. He always seems so gentlemanly when you see him with co-stars or his partner. Plus lickable and sexy as hell. It's all of a piece.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    if he had a temper, would that even change your mind? :)

  • Snath

    Wishful thinking. She's totally going to be mine when they break up.

  • Lemon_Poundcake

    Good plan. I'll take him.

  • Me

    What movie is that header pic from?

  • JoannaRobinson

    Not sure of the movie but that's the lovely Eva Green from The Dreamers. Which is somewhere on the "sexiest" list.

  • John G.

    Is she ever clothed in that movie?

  • RJ

    Not often, thank God.

  • Scully

    <--- my cinematic doppelganger is a rat

  • Scully

    I blame JJ Abrams for everything. Including the lack of sexyback in In Time.

  • PerpetualIntern

    Good godtopus Tess of the D'Urbervilles was rough.

  • John G.

    Tess of the D'urbervilles continues to be one of my favorite pieces of literature ever.

  • Snath

    If I had to pick a cinematic avatar, it would probably be Bastian from The Neverending Story. Yes, I'm a whiny baby nerd.

  • PerpetualIntern

    I used to put a necklace on my head and pretend to be the princess and hold the whooooole of Fantasia in my hand. Does that count?

  • JoannaRobinson


  • dahlia6

    Body Heat is worth it for William Hurt's porn-stache alone.

  • BarbadoSlim

    I don't know what Rachel did to her face but she don't look the same.

  • mswas

    Love how Joel McHale's hair time traveled in from the 80's.

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