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Katy Perry's GQ Spread Was Unusually Classy Until Her Crotch Sprouted A Fire Hose

By Joanna Robinson | Pajiba Love | January 21, 2014 | Comments ()

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I was really digging on this Katy Perry photoshoot. Sure, her rack was out, but somehow more tastefully than ever before? And her face didn’t look so caked in make-up that I would lose a quarter inch of fingertip if I poked at it. Not that I’m in the habit of poking the faces of pop tartlets. ANYWAY. Then came the the last picture which is, well, pretty classic Perry. Where would her career be without spray hoses, spray cans and spray cheese? (Celebitchy)

Speaking of sprouting things, Kevin Smith and Jennifer Garner promise that the Batfleck Suit is nipple-free. That’s a relief. (/Film)

The Office’s BJ Novak has released his first book and pulled a few strings to have Mindy Kaling and Emma Thompson read some excerpts from it for NPR. Is it good? I honestly can’t tell. Emma Thompson’s voice would make the phonebook sound like that book by Nabokov. (NPR)

Do we think these handmade fantasy dolls are more or less terrifying than a Furby? I’m going to go with more. But they’re also freaking amazing. (The Meta Picture)

Speak of terrifying troll-type things, did we all see how Sarah Palin made MLK JR Day about her and her politics? We did? Good. Moving on. (DListed)

In other monstrous news, some hapless reporter dared spoil Season 3 of Homeland for Jennifer Lawrence who was right in the middle of peeing the rug over meeting Damian Lewis for the first time. So, um, if you don’t like watching Oscar-winners pee themselves or Homeland spoilers, this post ain’t for you. (Uproxx)

And we all know that J Law is waaaay too enormously famous to star in a TV show at this point. (Talk about 12 years of sla-no? too soon?) But I am having trouble picturing anyone else for this bonkers remake of Barbarella. Click to find out where Nicolas Winding Refn’s (yeah, of Drive fame, yeah I’m confused too) Barbarella will air, stay for the most amazing Jane Fona gif I’ve ever seen. (io9)

Speaking of intergalactic sex romps, don’t you think these bedazzled knee pads from the Chanel runway are perfect for those long-lasting space blowies? Just because you’re protecting your patella, that’s no excuse to look anything less than fabulous, ladies. (Jezebel)

The air quotes in this headline about why Chris Christie is canceling his inaugural ball are my everything. (Gothamist)

Speaking of nefarious conspiracies, here’s a possible explanation for why the series finale of Dexter was so terrible. IT’S WORSE THAN YOU THINK. Much, much worse. (Unreality)

One of the very best film sites on these here internets, The Film Experience, has a Sundance review up of Richard Linklater’s incredible Boyhood, a movie that was filmed over 12 years with the same actors. Awwww, Training Day-era Ethan Hawke. Not a boy, not yet a douchebag. (TFE)

And here is your daily Star Wars casting rumor: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN, JUDI DENCH! (TMS)

BrittaneyNichole started the House of Night series by P.C. Cast and Kristin Cast when she was 18, and it’s coming close to an end. When you’re reading a series that will end up twelve books long, you might as well finish up your investment. See what BrittaneyNichole thought of the penultimate installment, Revealed. (Cannonball Read 6)

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Are you following Pajiba on Facebook or Twitter? Every time you do, Bill Murray crashes a wedding.

Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • ryallen

    You sure Jo? Looks like a fuck ton of makeup to me...

  • JLaw as Barbarella by Refn?! You've just described a credible version of utopia. Where do I send the money?

  • ed newman

    Please someone tell me if Katy Perry is actually attractive. Sometimes she looks real good, as in these photos, other times she looks like her makeup was applied via trowel, and other times she looks like a trainwreck all over. But, always, Boobs! My penis is confused.

  • TK

    Her body is genuinely terrific, and without the heavy makeup, she's still quite pretty. But the makeup-as-applied-by-spray-gun thing is part of her shtick, I guess.

  • I would act all indignant and offended by this, but I am pretty much in the same boat.

  • Al Borland's Beard

    Where would her career be without spray hoses, spray cans and spray cheese?

    Ironically, one of those things helped ruin Val Kilmer's career.

  • John W

    It cracks me up that people still keep pinging on the nipples of the batsuit in the Schumaker films as if that was the ONE thing keeping those movies from greatness.

  • Jezzer

    I think the Bat-nipples stuck out more (hee!) because they were in the trailers, so people got to work their indignation into a lather before the movie ever came out.

  • It's the civilians, you know. The Bat-nipples traumatized them. They're still going on about whether Robin will be in these things.

  • "If it wasn't for those Bat-nipples, people would have been able to focus on day-glo set design and the poetry of Ahnold's ice puns! DAMN YOU, SCHUMACHER!!!"

  • BWeaves

    I read the Star Wars news as Dame Judi Dench will play Mons Mothra.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Is that where Mothra's lair is?

  • BAM

    I'm not the biggest fan of manufactured pop starlets, but her recent documentary (Katy Perry) gave me at least a smidgen of additional respect for her and how hard she works at what she does. Doesn't make me a fan, but I don't dislike her as much.

  • Just because you’re protecting your patella, that’s no excuse to look anything less than fabulous, ladies.
    AND gents. And snowmen.

  • emmalita

    Ethan Hawke has always been a bag of douche. It's his thing. Sometimes it works for him, sometimes not.

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