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Kanye West & Kim Kardashian Take The Cover Of Vogue, World Dies In Response

By Agent Bedhead | Pajiba Love | March 24, 2014 | Comments ()


kimyevoguepl.jpg

Depending on what paparazzi photos you’ve glimpsed, Mila Kunis has been “pregnant” for years. Now she is pregnant for real. Yes, Ashton Kutcher is the father. (Dlisted)

Likewise, I feel like I’ve seen more than one Filth trailer starring James McAvoy. There’s a red-band version for your cursing pleasure. (FSR)

The CEO of Netflix cut a deal with Comcast, but he isn’t happy about it. Reed Hastings has swallowed a huge cost for consumers, but will they ever appreciate it? I know I’m lazy and uneducated enough to blame Netflix when it’s probably my sh-tty internet provider that is truly to blame. (WG)

Paul Walker’s Fast & Furious character will not receive the promised send off in the 7th movie. They’re going to CGI him into half of the movie. Does this somehow seem — I don’t know 00 disrespectful to Walker’s memory? Philip Seymour Hoffman will be CGI’d for merely one scene in Mockingjay. (Uproxx)

Jennifer Lawrence gave the middle finger to the paparazzi (while hiding her face) over the weekend. You’d never know it was her if you didn’t recognize Nicholas Hoult holding her hand. (Lainey)

Johnny Depp is wearing what the younguns call a “man-gagement” ring to memorialize his devotion to fiancée Amber Heard. The rest of his ensemble screams “millionaire hobo.” Do any of you men wear such a ring? I’m fascinated by this topic. (Celebitchy)

Nerds have spent far too much time thinking about how much Thor’s hammer would have weight if it had been forged from a dying star. (TMS)

This is an excellent and quickly informative map of the United States as featured in Hollywood disaster flicks. Los Angeles, New York, and San Francisco are (obviously) so screwed. (Slashfilm)

Everyone is super surprised that Kanye West and Kim Kardashian scored a Vogue cover. I’m not as offended as many people but do find it hilarious. Anna Wintour justified her decision in the following manner: “Kanye is an amazing performer and cultural provocateur, while Kim, through her strength of character, has created a place for herself in the glare of the world’s spotlight, and it takes real guts to do that.” Right. (GFY)

A plush octopus exists in the image of Captain America. There’s another one for Iron Man and one for Loki too. (Unreality)

The sheer variety of existing vending machines is astounding. Now there’s a machine that will make a fresh-to-order pizza in under 3 minutes. That looks disgusting. (MF)

Did you ever think playing too many video games was truly bad for you? A Norwegian teenager played himself into a damn coma. (Kotaku)

This sounds like a bad horror movie. An entire Colorado Springs block of homes has been swallowed by tumbleweeds: “We can’t get out of our homes.” (HuffPo)

“Who’d win in a wrestling match, Lemmy or God? Trick question, Lemmy is God.” So sayeth Lady B in her review of White Line Fever, the autobiography of Motorhead front man, Lemmy Kilmister. See if you agree. (Cannonball Read 6)

Bedhead lives in Tulsa. She can be found at Celebitchy.com.


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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not


  • BlackRabbit

    Just a general Pajiba question: you censor swears, but do articles on celebrity sex toys and tanning vaginas? Not criticizing, just curious.

  • Space Raptor

    Video games aren't bad for you, drinking 4 Litres of energy drink is.

  • mdm

    (Not directed at you, Agent Bedhead.)

    "Mangagement ring"? Fuck that insecure bullshit. It's an engagement ring. Pormanteauing the word "man" or "dude" or "bro" into something doesn't magically make it no homo, mostly because fashion and/or lifestyle choices don't make you gay. What makes you gay is having romantic feelings for and/or having intercourse with people of the same sex as you, while eschewing such things with the opposite sex, not where you call your fucking engagement ring a mangagement ring or not. You idiots.

    GOD. Every time I think modern manchildren can't get any more insecure about their sexuality I learn something new.

    "Mangagement ring"...what next, are dudes who want to seem like allies gonna start calling themselves femanists?

  • googergieger

    "Did you ever think playing too many video games was truly bad for you? A Norwegian teenager played himself into a damn coma."

    Yeah I did that with masturbation. Though technically it was called the world's longest and most justifiable nap. Don't look it up.

  • Bill Haverchuck

    I don't understand why people are so surprised about Mila Kunis and Michael Kelso. Her last boyfriend was Kevin McCallister, maybe she's not as amazing as everyone assumes she is.

  • Green_Eggs_and_Hamster

    "Yes, Ashton Kutcher is the father."

    I find myself much more upset/disappointed in this then I am in Kim and Kanye being on the cover of Vogue. Why Mila, why?

  • e jerry powell

    Red Bull gives you wings...

  • loo shag brolley

    Every time a model isn't on the cover of Vogue, an Evangelista loses its wings.

  • e jerry powell

    Oh, she lost her wings when she started dating Kyle McLachlan.

  • loo shag brolley

    Oh! You take that back!
    http://31.media.tumblr.com/vic...

  • Berry

    Is that super seriously a lobster on agent Cooper's head there? Because that might be the most amazing thing I've ever seen. or at least this week. Just imagine the conversations that must have led to that moment: Linda Evangelista giving Face like a boss, and agent Cooper with a lobster on his head. Amazing.

  • Repo

    Paul Walker is still being retired in Fast 7, they are just using the cgi to help retain as much as his performance was shot to get it on the screen. That said, I have the same Tron Legacy nightmares.
    Can't be worse than what they did to Tony's mom on the Sopranos though.

  • Bob Genghis Khan

    "...while Kim, through her strength of VAGINA, has created a place for
    herself in the glare of the world’s spotlight, and it takes real SHAMELESSNESS to do that.""

  • chanohack

    That tumbleweed thing happened a month or so ago in New Mexico, except people ACTUALLY couldn't get out of their homes because the houses were buried. Senior citizens had to be rescued. I didn't see that story on national news. (To be fair, the Colorado news segment was much more appealing, with the pretty houses and nice cars and the cute lady.)

  • A SRL for the worst companies in America would have Comcast in the top five.

  • idiosynchronic

    In case my geek cred was in doubt . . I looked at the Depp picture, and promptly forgot about the ring, and was, "WTF has Depp got plugged into his iPod, and why does it look like it's a 1995 CD-ROM drive?"

  • ZombieNurse

    I realize I have a problem with anthropomorphizing everything, but that close up picture of Johnny Depp's hat makes it look like the most darn excited hat to ever be worn!

  • idiosynchronic

    I had an engagement ring 14 years ago. A lot of people, men and women, were confused by the silver band I wore, but I liked it. And people are still confused now about my wedding band which has a single diamond it it, making it look like . . a 'manly' engagement band. (It matches hers, and her engagement ring is a thin band with little diamond stars set in it.)

  • BWeaves

    Tumbleweeds are scary. They're big, and they're hard. They're not fluffy. They can put a serious dent in your car if you hit one. Plus, they are dry. If someone drops a cigarette, that whole neighborhood is going to be engulfed in flames.

  • BWeaves

    I prefer this version of the cover:

    http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix...

  • abell

    Incidentally, yes, I am wearing an engagement ring right now! And I'm a man!

  • Ryan Ambrose

    “Kanye is an amazing performer and cultural provocateur, while Kim, through her strength of character, has created a place for herself in the glare of the world’s spotlight, and it takes real guts to do that.”

    That's the kindest way I have ever seen someone say "he's a rich douchebag and an egomaniac while she is a vapid talentless attention seeking whore who's only famous for milking her sex tape."

  • Sofia

    "He's a rich douchebag and an egomaniac while she is a vapid talentless attention seeking whore who's only famous for milking her sex tape" is the easiest, most mainstream way of describing them, too.

    Even if you don't like Kanye's music, you can't deny he changed the game after releasing College Dropout. As for Kim, it's quite easy to call her an idiot because she's not a performer or a particularly talented person, but she has managed to build a multi-million dollar empire since her sextape came out and people are still talking about her.

    You don't have to like them, but it is undeniable that they are part of pop culture if they show up in everything from Vogue to Pajiba.

  • Bob Genghis Khan

    That she is undeniably a part of Pop Culture is the problem, and I think was his entire point.

  • Sofia

    The thing about pop culture is that it needs to be entertaining. Some people are entertained by hating on the Kardashians, Justin Bieber, and Paris Hilton while others just enjoy the product they put out. Why? Because it's fun. Sometimes they're funny. I watch Kim's reality show because it's hilarious. Does it make me dumb? No, it just means I have a different sense of humor. I don't think that there's anything wrong with them being part of pop culture. We all put them there, and we're all keeping them there as long as we talk about them.

  • Dumily

    You forgot about her big ass. She's famous for her big ass too.

  • oui

    She has a big ass big ass!

  • John W

    Someone explain to me what the big deal is about that cover? Don't those two only exists on magazine covers? They're like Freddy Kreuger, they're powerless unless we give it to them, right?

  • Well, it's really that (supposedly) Anna Wintour has so far utterly refused to consider Kardashian important enough to be acknowledged by...well, her and the whole High Fashion world. But apparently Kanye has enough pull, and has been bugging her to have her on the cover for AGES, and she seems to have finally caved in. Though not completely, as KK's not alone on the cover.

    And anyway, as ridiculous as it seems, a lot of people are annoyed that this uh, legitimizes her fame in some way. If that makes sense. It's all very silly.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Vogue supposedly represented a last bastion of class, where you could only make the cover for being a movie star, model, princess, rock star, or some combination thereof. Tawdry reality/homemade porn star? Well, clutch my pearls and feather my bob.

  • Laszlo

    Well, Kanye's a rap star, and I don't see how a princess earned it any more than a reality star.

  • Arran

    She's the WRONG KIND of pretty woman, apparently.

    I hate it when people dismiss stuff with "Well, I'm just more concerned with IMPORTANT stuff, like global warming", but…Jesus, your life must be pretty trouble-free in general if Kim Kardashian being on the cover of Vogue genuinely upsets you.

  • Guest

    That comparison works on so many levels!

  • a “man-gagement” ring

    He must be pussymatized.

  • An entire Colorado Springs block of homes has been swallowed by tumbleweeds: “We can’t get out of our homes.”

    And to think we all laughed at Shyamalan! It's The Occurring, just as he predicted!

    Sorry, no wait...

    And to think we all laughed at Shyamalan! The Taking Place - it's here! Just as he predicted!

    No, that's still not right, is it...

    Oh I remember: Fuck Lady in the Water.

  • Berry

    Men in Finland wear an engagement ring, but not a wedding band. They don't wear engagement rings as seen on American TV though, or on Amber Heard there. Just simple bands.

    This has been today's anthropology lesson for small Northern European countries. Next week: sauna. How everyone else does it completely wrong, and how it's NOT a Swedish thing, thank you very much, Men Behaving Badly.

  • loo shag brolley

    Wait, so many questions. Does the engagement band come off once vows are made?

    Okay really just the one question.

  • Berry

    No, men wear them as long as the marriage lasts. Or most of them do. Some of them lose theirs when a friend invites them to watch a hockey game in a private box with an open bar. Which may or may not have happened to my husband. Spoiler alert: it totally did.

  • Mrs. Julien

    When I take off my ring, Mr. Julien refers to it as "removing my vows".

  • Berry

    Is that your frolicking with Henry Cavill time?

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