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Joseph Gordon Levitt Won't Dignify Those Gay Rumors With A Response, Snuggles Kitten Instead

By Agent Bedhead | Pajiba Love | September 13, 2013 | Comments ()


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Happy Friday the 13th! For those of you who suffer from paraskavedekatriaphobia, you may be interested in reviewing the history of this most auspicious day. (Mental Floss)

Did you know that Vince Gilligan wrote the original draft of Hancock, when it was about a superhero who couldn’t climax for fearing of killing his lover? Did you also know that director Peter Berg got into a beef with Gilligan over rewrites? Here’s the lowdown. (Uproxx)

Some sick bastard gave a woman a date-rape drug and branded his initials on her vaginal region. No words. (Gawker)

The Ghost Team One trailer: Because the world needed another ghost-fucking movie. (Slashfilm)

Demi more has traded up, sort of. She used to date Harry Morton (of Pink Taco fame), and now she’s dating his dad, Peter (of Hard Rock Cafe fame). I’d make a lame joke about a restauranteur fetish, but Demi obviously doesn’t indulge in food. (DListed)

If anyone knows what’s going on with this Justin Timberlake shoot, educate me. (Celebitchy)

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Joseph Gordon Levitt refuses to answer to your gay rumors. He says an answer would be “tacky.” And you know what? He may have worded his answer in an ineloquent manner, but his sentiment makes sense. (Out Magazine)

In contrast, Jake Gyllenhaal is thrilled that people questioned his sexuality after watching Brokeback Mountain. (E! Online)

Julie Chen says bosses coaxed her into plastic surgery to look “less Chinese.” (Us Weeky)

Willem Dafoe is set to kill Keanu Reeves in an upcoming movie. Whoa. (Film School Rejects)

I love this story about how Sara Gilbert told Johnny Galecki she wanted to reveal how he helped her realize she’s a lesbian. He offered to hold her hand on air while she told the tale. In other news, Johnny Galecki is my new, American-styled boyfriend. (People)

Nicole Kidman got violently knocked to the ground by an idiot paparazzo on a bike. (Buzzfeed)

Rumor has it they decided to rename TIFF 2013 as “The Benedict Cumberbatch Festival.” (Vulture)

Dustin is really quite angry about the final season of “Dexter,” y’all. He’s naming names, and his fury is a beautiful sight to witness. (Warming Glow)

This is an awful dress, but somehow Rose Byrne pulls it off in grand fashion. (Go Fug Yourself)

No one has made this video until now? Presenting Mad X-Men, the advertising mutants. (Kotaku)

Is anyone else completely underwhelmed by this latest trailer for August: Osage County? Great ensemble. Lovely scenery (an hour from my home). I should be drooling, but I’m not.

Agent Bedhead lives in Tulsa. She & her little black heart can be found at celebitchy.com.



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Comments Are Welcome, Jerks Will Be Banned


  • Kate at June

    Can we not put horrible stories of sexual assault in Pajiba Love without a warning first?

    That shit is mega triggering. Its why I generally avoid feministing, jezebel, etc.

  • John W

    Julianne Nicholson is in August so it can't be all bad.

    PS. Kudos to Johnny and Sara.

  • Salieri2

    All right. Goddammit. There are words, people. It is called a VULVA. I am not saying it is impossible that this monstrous hemorrhoid branded his initials into this poor woman's vagina, because there is apparently no limit to what these men feel they have the right to do to women's bodies, but unless she woke up, felt pain, and checked herself out with an internal camera--perhaps the one lying around after said branding?--then she was Not. Branded. On. Her. Vagina. Jesus fucking Christ on a pony. English is a perfectly good, evocative, maddeningly inconsistent but in no way sparse language and we've got this covered, I swear to God.

    "The vulva (from the Latin vulva, plural vulvae, see etymology*) consists of the external genital organs of the female mammal."

    "The vagina (from Latin vāgīna, literally "sheath" or "scabbard") is a fibromuscular elastic tubular tract which is a sex organ and has two main functions: sexual intercourse and childbirth."

    The rampant misuse of the word vagina hacks me off no end. I want to build my own motherfucking Chrome extension that seeks out and destroys all these "starlet flashes vagina"/ "cop punched me in my vagina"/ "sumbitch brands woman in vagina" usages, replacing them with the sadly ignored vulva.

  • Uriah_Creep

    Whatever the fuck he branded, that guy is why I still believe in capital punishment. Or "a cheek for a cheek", perhaps.

  • Chiqui

    Your wrath makes my vagina tickle

  • e jerry powell

    It's "giney."

  • Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you meant where Chinese people live.

    (sorry couldn't resist a Slither reference. I love that movie!)

  • Salieri2

    Exactly the kind of response I hoped for. Tickle what, though?

  • googergieger

    He's totally gay. With me. In this comic I drew.

  • e jerry powell

    Up in Roswell they still call her DoMe More. I say more power to her. Putting up with all the slut shaming takes a lot of energy.

  • hippyherb

    I read the DListed article and found it really gross. Demi Moore isn't gross, but the crass, crude way it was written is.

  • e jerry powell

    Sometimes kittens are way more fun than The Gay.

  • Yocean

    Friday the 13th is the holy day of Freya, the goddess of beauty and magic in North mythology and because she was so popular the church decided to make it an unlucky day the Christ died. At least that's what I remember from Josph Campbell books.

  • IngridToday

    Christianity is a weird amalgamation of religions/traditions. Historically, they condemned certain traditions but then took on other traditions;
    Christmas (despite Jesus being born in the spring) has a tree, yule log, presents --all of those things came from other cultures. Just like Easter follows the Equinox and it's symbols being rabbits and eggs (signs of fertility). Early Christians realize that letting people/joining them in certain celebrations was more effective they telling them to abandon everything.

    It's a bit ironic how early Christians' effort to convert people ended up saving old traditions

  • The placement of Easter is actually based on the Jewish calendar and the occurrence of Pesach (Passover). But yeah, the other traditions surrounding the holiday are basically Pagan in origin.

  • Fredo

    All the conspiracy shows have told me that it's considered unlucky because on Friday the 13th, 1305, the French crown and the Catholic Church moved against and destroyed the Knights Templar.

    But not before they moved their treasure to Scotland and then to America.

    At least, that's what Nicolas Cage said.

  • Bedewcrock

    I'm very underwhelmed by August Osage County but I'm generally underwhelmed by Julia Roberts always (*shakes fist at Erin Brokovich*).

    I like all those actors too but the dialogue presented in the trailer isn't funny or new (but maybe it's just the trailer). I just read the summary on Wikipedia, I think the play was probably better. Also, the playwright/screenwriter is the offspring of Billie Letts (Where the Heart Is, The Honk and Holler Opening Soon) so I'm not sure what to do with that.

  • mrsdalgliesh

    I saw the play with the original cast and it is a great version of the "dysfunctional family comes together and shit happens" genre. The original set was astonishing; it will be weird to see it with actual land and space. I'll be pissed if they've screwed it up.

  • Quatermain

    This may be my male ego talking, but if I had a girl tell me 'dating you helped me realize I was a lesbian' I don't know that I'd necessarily take that as a compliment. Then again, maybe I would. I have a sneaky suspicion that it would take me about a minute and a half to spin that into 'dating you helped me realize I was a lesbian because after you no other man could possibly do.'

    Also, the Gawker story about the vagina brander has a link to another story about a dude who gave a legit spa a bad review on Yelp because he tried to get a handy from the therapist giving him a massage and was subsequently thrown out. Apparently it's just a day for terrible dudes nationwide.

  • emmalita

    I can't read Gawker any more. I hate people too much after I read Gawker.

  • Natalie Loren

    If that's the only time you hate people too much, then you're doing it right.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    I could maybe believe Julie Chen's "excuse" for plastic surgery to her eyes. But she clearly got a nose job as well.

  • Actually, maybe not. Someone in the comments posted pictures of her with and without makeup and it looks like she's really good at "contouring".

    ETA: Actually, there was another picture that showed "contouring" makeup more clearly. But it did have a Ms. Chen w/ and w/o makeup...

  • Sara_Tonin00

    I also discounted the possibility of Photoshop.

    but I still think she got a nose job. Not that it reeeeeeally matters in the long run, it just feels disingenous.

  • Tom

    I thought it was "triskaidekaphobia" which is greek literally translates to "three and ten fear"

  • Bert_McGurt

    That's just fear of the NUMBER 13, not FRIDAY the 13th.

  • Tom

    that's right. thanks.

  • Fredo

    Willem Dafoe is set to kill Keanu Reeves in an upcoming movie. Whoa.

    So we finally get that duel that we were denied when Keanu backed out of Speed 2?

    As for JGL? Uhhh....who cares?

  • Bert_McGurt

    I was assuming Keanu's going to be serial-crushed by a huge fr*ggin guy.

    ETA: Goddammit Disqus, you make me censor FR*GGIN? Who makes your goofball Puritanical rules?

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Disqus is censoring words?

    Fuck. Shit. Cocksucker.

    Friggin.

    EDIT: Nope, still works.

  • Bert_McGurt

    Anytime I try to post certain curse words, Disqus will just hang and refuse to accept the comment. Won't even work if I post and then edit. Might be some other software I suppose, maybe it depends on the browser, but it's bloody annoying.

  • Quatermain

    Would this crushing happen before or after THE FIIIIRE FIIIIGHTTT!!!?

  • Fredo

    This is going to end with someone posting the pic of Dafoe in drag on all fours on the carpet, calling a large Mob goombah "daddy".

  • Maguita NYC

    "As for JGL? Uhhh....who cares"

  • bastich

    "BLASPHEMER!!!"

  • Maguita NYC

    Thank you. I was too overwhelmed and speechless to do anything but point and silent-scream in horror.
    ...
    And I apologize for the bad hair day.

  • Fredo

    Meaning "who cares if he is, isn't or doesn't?"

  • Three_nineteen

    Eh. If it's true, JGL wouldn't even be the first gay celebrity known by three initials that I am head over heels in lust for.

  • Maguita NYC

    Meaning "you murderer of kittens, and all cute things pure and good. ie JGL".

  • bastich

    Did anyone else read the post title as "...smuggles kittens instead"?

    Kinda fits with the picture.

  • BWeaves

    Yes.

  • idiosynchronic

    I'd gladly smiggle kittens to the kindest and cutest famileis.

    *snort*

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