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Johnny Depp Ain't Couch Jumping Yet, But He's Damn Close

By Agent Bedhead | Pajiba Love | April 4, 2014 | Comments ()


pldeppletterman.jpg

Many people agree that late-night television could use a female host in the wake of David Letterman’s retirement announcement. I heartily agree — just not this woman. (DB)

Seth Meyers truly understands why many of us are so upset to see Dave go. Seth gave a very appropriate tribute last night. (WG)

Look, Scarlett Johansson knows you’re going to screencap any nude scenes she does on film. She’s only interested in making sure those scenes have artistic integrity. (Uproxx)

Let’s face it: Johnny Depp, Tom Cruise, and Brad Pitt are no longer spring chickens. Then again, neither are you. (GFY)

The world of fanfiction is a frightening yet wonderful thing. Guess which franchise beats Twilight in sheer quantity of fanfiction pieces? The answer shouldn’t surprise me. (Unreality)

Tumblr has a great time with Tom Hiddleston in The Pirate Fairy. (TMS)

Johnny Depp is doing the talk-show circuit to promote Transcendence. He talks a lot about Amber Heard during these interviews. Dude is so far gone. Should we be happy for him? I’m happier for Amber. (Lainey)

Since we’re on the verge of talking about couch jumping, let’s move onto Tom Cruise’s next likely target for a Xenu-shattering romance: Elisabeth Moss. (Celebitchy)

The Expendables 3 already has a trailer. They blow shit up. Lots of actors claim paychecks. They blow more shit up. The end. (FSR)

A baseball historian contemplates the reality of a never-ending baseball game. This is where I step in like a clueless a-hole (which I am) and mention that all baseball games last an eternity. (MF)

The mondo poster for Captain America: The Winter Soldier is predictably cool as hell. (Slashfilm)

Mariah Carey may be the one person on the planet who retains blissful ignorance concerning the existence of Kim Kardashian’s ass. Mariah’s completely full of it, of course. She’s taking the p-ss on the Klan. (DListed)

What do you mean, not every reads an internet story before commenting? That sounds like an April Fool’s joke to me. (Kotaku)

Did you ever feel that Downton Abbey needed a splash of dystopia? Well then, you’re in luck! Caitlin recommends Landry Park by Bethany Hagen to satisfy all of your dystopian courtship needs. (Cannonball Read 6)

Here’s the first teaser for Zoe Saldana’s NBC miniseries/remake of Rosemary’s Baby. It’s as awful as you ever suspected it would be:

Aaand because it’s Friday and I’m about to cut and run for Winter Soldier, here’s Superdog doing a slow-mo face plant into a couch:

Bedhead lives in Tulsa. She can be found at Celebitchy.com.


'Captain America: The Winter Soldier' Review: Changing The Landscape Of The Marvel Universe, And Doing It With Style | Was Lindsay Lohan Supposed to Play Maria Hill in 'The Avengers'?


Are you following Pajiba on Facebook or Twitter? Every time you do, Bill Murray crashes a wedding.


Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not


  • idiosynchronic

    I remember when writing slash could get you a contract 2 novel contract from Bantam books and all the leather you could ever want. [/trekkie]

  • Vangie13

    Hi, dude!

  • TheOriginalMRod

    Oh Elisabeth Moss... Yikes and super yikes! Good lord I felt sorry for Katie Holmes, but I actually LIKE Elisabeth Moss.

    Run Elisabeth RUN!!!!

  • e jerry powell

    Treating Laura Prepon like a passing phase is the work of a total shitheel in my book.

  • BobbFrapples

    That first link has a spelling error. Peole is nice, many agree.

  • For my own sanity, I cannot click on anything connected to the Rosemary's Baby remake. I'd rather rage read Son of Rosemary again than watch one minute of a remake that thinks the location of the story was arbitrary to the success of the film.

  • lowercase_ryan

    Anyone else think Tina Fey could do late night? Any other suggestions?

  • I'm actually inclined toward TDS' Jessica Williams. Not saying it'll happen (yet), just saying I think she'd be good, She has that energy... extroverted without being hammy, friendly in a sincere but slightly detached way. I could see her getting people to relax and chat and be funny.

  • lowercase_ryan

    I am literally in love with Jessica Williams, but I don't think she's a big enough name.

  • Both solid bets, though Jessica Williams would need a platform with slightly less imposed constraints to allow viewers to engage her full personality. We only get a few minutes at a go, in a pretty scripted context, and hosting is something else again. I think she's up to it, but the best thing for her in this direction would be a lower stakes option on which she could build.

    I agree with @lowercase_ryan:disqus, Tina is awesome, and it would be fascinating to see her strike the balance between clever fun and bringing out the edge. She's best when her commentary is cutting and sharp, but as host of this format your opportunities for that are somewhat limited. Although, the breaking of the big three networks has enabled some creativity to blossom in show structure, as witnessed by how Fallon has kept some of his goofy, charming stuff. Let's give her a go!

  • lowercase_ryan

    I've never liked Mariah Carey so damn much. I want to see Kim and Kris seethe with anger when they read that.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Damn you. Now I feel compelled to click on a DListed link.

  • lowercase_ryan

    and ryan gets a nickle.

    MOAR PEOPLE CLICK PLEASE! DADDY NEEDS TO EAT!

  • Sara_Tonin00

    was not worth it. :P

  • lowercase_ryan

    you're not the one who got a nickle

  • Berry

    That unreality fanfiction article is pretty good. As the self-appointed Pajiba defender of all things fanfiction, I give it my seal of cautious approval. I would have done that when Dusting posted the same link yesterday, but due to time zone differences that happened when I was asleep, an doing it this morning my time, when everyone else had moved on from PLove felt pointless.

    Also, a question. Is there any kind of internet advice column that could tell me how much alcohol it's okay to drink the night before yoga class? Especially when one hasn't been to yoga in like five years.

  • Miss Laaw-yuhr

    Enough so that you remain drunk the next day cause that shit is going to hurt otherwise.

  • VonnegutSlut

    "Tom misses the companionship of a woman." --Quote from a friend/CO$ source in the piece about the potentiality of Elizabeth Moss & Tom Cruise

    Somehow that, again, just strikes me as kinda awkward wording & comes across as some of that weird Xenu/android/GUYS-I-LOVE-THE-LADIES almost-speak that continues to swirl around him.

    "Tom smell womenhood nicely. Movie star misses the having of lady parts. Female to do the sexy work & love what they can has is seem nice to him."

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