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Ian McKellen Has Cancer, You Say? Well F*ck You Too, Universe.

By Joanna Robinson | Pajiba Love | December 11, 2012 | Comments ()


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Happy Hobbit Week, my little Haflings! How are we feeling? Is your pipe-weed packed? Your pantry brimming? Did you remember to bring your handkerchief? Only three more days until the premiere (two if you're an adorable, horn of Gondor-blowing, midnight screening type). To tide you over, here's a morsel or two of Hobbit-y linkage. First of all, did you know Ian McKellan has been living with cancer for the past few years? Of course you didn't. Because he's kept it to himself. In fact, in revealing it now, he's very blasé about it. He's an international treasure, keeps your damn hands off of him, cancer. (THR)

If you're worried about keeping the 13 dwarves of The Hobbit straight and are unwilling to use my system (hot one, fat one, tall one...), here's a handy, printable guide to recognizing the little beardos. (LOTR Project)

This full body cable knit onesie looks rather hobbitish, doesn't it? But where is the flap, man? WHERE IS THE FLAP? (Obvious Winner)

Though you won't see much of Benedict Cumberbatch in the first Hobbit film, the internet is all a-flutter over who he will be playing in the next Star Trek film. My burning question is "WHY?" WHY DO WE CARE? Did it matter who Marion Cotillard was playing in The Dark Knight Rises? No. Most assuredly not. Anyway, if you care enough to speculate, here's a new "clue." Or "red herring." Or something. Have at it, Sherlocks. (Boing Boing)

Unreality has a list of the 20 most badass Star Wars tattoos. I don't know how "badass" these wee light sabers are, but they are ridiculously adorable. (Unreality)
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Speaking of miniature. cute things, this baby chameleon photo looks like a total Rango-festation. (Twisted Sifter
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Friend of the site and hilarious dude, Brock Wilbur is releasing his Filmpocalypse project wherein he spent a year reviewing one apocalyptic film per week. Trust me, this dude is going places, take this chance to say you knew him when. (Filmpocalypse)

Here's a round-up of the best commercials of 2012. No, really, they're the funny ones, not the relentlessly and oppressively cheer-some Holiday ones. (WG)

Speaking of Holiday things, I am agog at this giant tree made of saucers and cups. (Colossal)
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The ever-so-lovely Mrs. Julien thought you Pajibans might enjoy these fancy octopus ornaments. (Crate & Barrel)

Speaking of fine cinema, the Critic's Choice nominations have been released...ergo, Affleck is finally gonna win that Oscar. (TFE)

You'll be forgiven if you were distracted in that last link by the bondage gear Anne Hathaway is wearing on her calves. Check it out from all angles in this spread. It's okay, just this once, to let your inner celeb*tch out. (Celebitchy wenn20024048.jpg



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Comments Are Welcome, Jerks Will Be Banned


  • Jezzer

    I was interested in "The Hobbit," before I found out they were stretching it into a trilogy. I could see it maybe -- maybe -- as a two-parter, but a trilogy? There isn't enough story for three movies, unless you plan on adding lots of filler.

  • Lauren_Lauren

    Nooooooooooo, no no no no, Sir Ian McKellan can NOT have cancer. I'm pretty sure that if you're a beloved, metal-bending gay wizzard, your prostate has ways to try and shut that whole thing down.

  • BWeaves

    WHERE IS THE FLAP?

    It's a slit in the crotch. I can tell by the overlap in the "fly" area. There's an obvious knit two together with moss stitch in the under fly and 1x1 ribbing on the fly. Or so my grannysense tells me.

    Although, I find it most disturbing that this onesie is modeled in front of the toilet.

  • What the actual f*ck, Anne Hathaway? Are fancy garbage bags in now?

  • Who Marion Cotillard played didn't matter because we figured it out from her first leaked set photos. Then the "no she's not!" defense came in and that was as good as Nolan saying "you got me!" for confirmation.

  • Clancys_Daddy

    Anyone really think Gandalf is going down to cancer? One word Balrog.

  • BlackRabbit

    The fingersabers are cute. The horrible earhoops, not so much. Yeah, I created words.

  • BWeaves

    Holy crap. You could stick a penis through her lobes.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    that might be the point.

  • Muhnah_Muhnah

    Oh man...that sucks! About the cancer, I mean. I was at his pub last night, but he didn't show. Just as well, I might have hugged him and begged him to be my grandpa. Or cool uncle. And lend me his Magneto helmet.

  • Tinkerville

    Can someone please tell me why celebrities do that pose and how that became a thing? Is that attractive to anyone? I'm genuinely curious. Granted, Hathaway's not doing the usual version of it where they slouch forward, but every time I see another starlet posing that way I think of Gob Bluth doing the chicken dance. I... I don't get it.

  • Leelee

    It's not about attractiveness, it's about size. Specifically, the hands around the ribcage to make it appear as small as possible, elbows forward so that the collarbone juts out, and the overall appearance of the upper body is diminished. A gently bent leg makes it appear longer than if it were straight, and it's crossed to one side to minimise the width of the hips.
    Slouching forward tends to make the placement of hands of ribcage look even smaller, and the collarbone pop out even more.

    It's hellishly difficult to balance properly while doing all that. My sister and I once tried the the classic hands just above hips, elbows back and shoulders dropped down, with legs crossed so far it looks like you're having a toilet emergency pose, and we fell over in a heap of dresses and high heels. I don't think we're destined to be starlets.

  • DominaNefret

    But... but...
    her arms look longer than her legs.

  • Tinkerville

    That was very interesting and informative, thank you. I was at a loss as to why that pose would ever be a thing, let alone a pose that some of the most beautiful women in the world are encouraged to do.

    While I can understand the size argument, I'm still a little flabbergasted by the cost-benefit of it-- as in, your ribcage looks smaller and your legs look longer, but that doesn't change the fact that you look like a deranged turkey. But that's just me, and I know next to nothing about fashion. Carry on, starlets.

  • Leelee

    Hahaha - I'm dead at "deranged turkey". Don't you know it's fashion, darling? Looking human is SO last season!

  • Mrs. Julien

    Mr. Julien and I had a running joke where I would come in the living room and pose like that, or in the "Hey! I'm looking over my shoulder at my own ass!" formation, and he would shout at me like he was a paparazzo.

    I'm so glad I have access today and can share my derangement with all of you.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    we are blessed by your derangement, and miss it when deprived

  • BWeaves

    Have yourself a very Cthulhu Christmas,
    Let tentacles be gay,
    From now on our suckers will be in the way.

    Through the years
    We will all be tied together,
    If the Fates allow
    Hang a Godtopus upon the highest bough.
    And have yourself a merry Cthulhu Christmas now.

  • BierceAmbrose

    That is awesome. You're my savior for that. My own personal Jesus Christ.

  • Pentadactyl

    John Mitchell, Guy of Gisborne and Dr Jekyll. Beyond that, I resort to bald one, fat one, grey one etc.

  • BWeaves

    Yes.

  • JoannaRobinson

    Mmmmmmmmm Mitchell.

  • TheOriginalMRod

    The cable-knit onesie is interesting, only because I have been looking for a Hemingway-esque fisherman's sweater for a Christmas gift... I don't think Papa would have approved. And damn, that looks itchy!

  • VonnegutSlut

    I think the gimp from the first season of American Horror Story fucked Anne Hathaway's calves.

  • Muhnah_Muhnah

    What the? Are you me? Am I you? Am I nah, muhnah muhnah?

  • VonnegutSlut

    Here you go...I hereby abdicate the muhnah muhnah to Muhnah_Muhnah.

  • Muhnah_Muhnah

    Thank you. Identity crisis averted. And us Vonnegut sluts need to stick together.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Cancer is a mofo, but it's prostate cancer and you usually die with it not of it, as it were. My dad and his identical twin both had it and death got them (3 months apart) by entirely different means.

    Here's a fun interesting prostate cancer story: Pater Julien only got himself checked for it because they found out Uncle Julien had it. Pater's cancer had spread a bit and they might have found out too late, if not for the twin thing.

  • googergieger

    My problem with holiday commercials is the fact that Santa is waaaaaaaaay too busy to be working that many different jobs. Car salesman? Home improvement store worker? Come on T.V. I'm all for suspense of disbelief, but how can Santa create toys all year, write his list of the good and the bad, deliver all the toys on one night, AND work full and part time jobs?!

    That dog won't hunt monsignor.

  • Bert_McGurt

    Hardware store Santa should at least get some giant flashlights at employee discount instead of relying on drunken reindeer.

  • VonnegutSlut

    Those are clearly Stunt Santas...he's got several of them a la Uday Hussein...and yes, I just compared Santa to Saddam Hussein's son. 'Tis the season!

  • melissa

    Man, whatevs. Richard Armitage is always the hot one.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Word. And they aren't ashamed of playing it up in the advertising. That poster of all the dwarves? Hot Dwarf and Pseudo Aragorn, Richard Armitage, is smack in the center. Which brings us back to beards. YAY!

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