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Gwyneth Paltrow Thinks People Are Jealous of Her Work Ethic. Yes, Honey, Stop Working So Hard At Making Me Dislike You.

By Joanna Robinson | Posted Under Pajiba Love | Comments (22)



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Happy Friday, my loves! Any internet writer will tell you that the scarcity of SNL clips on the internet is killer. It’s eeevil. Well Splitsider has hit the mother lode with this Complete History of Celebrity Jeopardy (with clips!). Oh, Darrell Hammond, you national treasure. (Splitsider)

This Celebitchy post has not only some prize GOOP smuggery, but also leaks Gwyneth’s Adele cover. That’s right… Gwyneth’s covering Adele on “Glee.” Rev up your arm saws. (Celebitchy)

An Evil Dead remake? BOOO! Where’s my boom stick?!? Oh, Bruce Campbell approved? Hmm. WHOA, THE MARY SUE PROPOSES NATHAN FILLION AS ASH!?! That’s smart, that’s S-Mart. (The Mary Sue)

Speaking of S-mart, here is a sneak peak at some glorious book cover prints. Somebody get me that Cthulhu one. NOW. (G 1988)

Speaking of lit-rah-toore, this clever tumblr, sent to me by lady lobo, combines apt literary quotes with TV screen caps. I’ve included her favorite and mine (from “Community”) below. (Slaughterhouse 90210)

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Evil Beet praises this Vogue photo shoot for not sexualizing four of today’s (really) young up and coming actresses (e.g. Chloe Moretz and Hailee Steinfeld). But, honestly I think they look one cherry liqueur-filled bon-bon away from a sexy make-out session and I would like the egregiously absent Saoirse Ronan to come and knock their heads together. (Evil Beet Gossip)

zomgmouse and I can’t tell if these “movie barcodes” are ALL the screencaps from a given film smooshed together, or just some. Either way they’re super swanky. (Movie Barcode)

I haven’t talked about “Doctor Who” for, oh, three days maybe? Aren’t you proud? (That’s a lie, I think I talked about it two days ago.) Anyway, here’s an adorable Peanuts/Who mash-up and a kick-ass “Lost”/Who mash-up. Be still my beating hearts.

If you have some spare shekels to rub together, I recommend you donate to this particular charity to help Japan. Not just because it’s a good cause, but because they then grant you access to some exclusive music like Ben Folds’ cover of Ke$ha’s “Sleazy.” I KNOW, RIGHT?! I’m digging through my couch right now in search of shekels. (Download To Donate)

Speaking of music, this Best Week Ever post covers one of my biggest pet peeves of all time, egregious misuse of music in commercials. The most recent one to boil my lobster is Collective Soul’s truck ad. I will admit, this list’s number one is hilarious. (Best Week Ever)

Have you ever checked out the “How It Should Have Ended” series? They’re all fun, but this Scream installment is my favorite so far.

Has anyone watched BBC’s “Human Planet” yet? I’ll admit, I’m waiting to see it in HD. This spoof segment on “The Douche” is pretty extraordinary. You can practically smell the Axe Body Spray.

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Comments

The Chin and The Fillion in/on the same project would make my heart grow a million sizes. Oh Godtopus, please make it be so.

Posted by: JenVegas at April 15, 2011 1:36 PM

It is "mother lode." I dun checked. (SWEEEEEEET! Fixed. --JR)

Posted by: kate the great at April 15, 2011 1:36 PM

You know, I just saw "Paul," and couldn't help but think, "WOW!! Blythe Danner looks amazing! And much less emaciated/annoying than her stick-bitch daughter!"

If GP frucks up Adele, there's gonna be a Lynching....

Posted by: dammitjanet at April 15, 2011 1:39 PM

some glorious book cover prints.

The Paradise Lost one is STUNNING.

Posted by: Anna von Beav at April 15, 2011 1:41 PM

The Landry/Tyra photo and quote on that Slaughterhouse website is superb. I have a new favorite tumblr.

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at April 15, 2011 1:42 PM

Re: Evil Dead remake.
NO! No no no no no. I don't care who would play Ash, that is sacrilege. You could grab the absolute perfect cast and I would still be adamantly against this.

Posted by: Paultera at April 15, 2011 1:45 PM

" I think there’s a part of me that because I think I do a lot, I think my work ethic is the reason why I’m successful. I think that a lot of people don’t want to put in effort and it’s easier to not change, not do something good for you, not work on your relationship, not make yourself a meal, not work out."

Okay, "work ethic" suggests that you are a hard worker. "Work" suggests that some of the things you do are onerous, unpleasant, challenging, etc. Making yourself a meal, doing something good for you, etc. don't fall into that category. Jesus, she's insufferable.

Posted by: samantha t at April 15, 2011 1:46 PM

Okay, "work ethic" suggests that you are a hard worker. "Work" suggests that some of the things you do are onerous, unpleasant, challenging, etc. Making yourself a meal, doing something good for you, etc. don't fall into that category.

Agreed. All that efforty stick-to-itiveness... I've never been good at follow-thr

Posted by: branded at April 15, 2011 1:53 PM


She's going to be on GLEE again? Fucking hell, Gwynnie. I will defend you to the death but you have GOT to stop doing this shit. There's only so many heads I'm willing to cut off for your sake and my sword arm is getting REALLY tired. So go home, think about what you did and...JUST...STOP.

Posted by: Figgy at April 15, 2011 2:21 PM

I've ordered devices like that before - wasted a pretty penny, I don't mind telling you. And if The Penis Mightier works, I'll order a dozen!

Posted by: Sean Connery at April 15, 2011 2:21 PM

First the insufferable New York Times article. Now Gwyneth is covering Adele. I'm going to crawl inside a hole and die now.

Posted by: beckster at April 15, 2011 2:22 PM

Two more Peanuts/Doctor Who mashups (apparently popular)
http://tinyurl.com/6fq6q6t
http://tinyurl.com/5rhju5b

Posted by: Patty O'Green at April 15, 2011 2:35 PM

don't complain, folks. the more of this she does, the less relevant/interesting she'll become. then she'll go away. and get fat.

Posted by: stump at April 15, 2011 2:56 PM

Wow, those Slaughterhouse 90210 range from humorous to soul crushing. The one of Chris Farley almost made me cry.

Posted by: Patty O'Green at April 15, 2011 3:03 PM

Isn't it about that time for Gwen to go home and get knocked up so she can name the new little GOOPster after a fruit or Biblical prophet or both? I mean 'Lil Cumquat Jeremiah ain't just gonna go conceive himself y'know.

Posted by: bleujayone at April 15, 2011 3:28 PM

Cunt: see header pic

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at April 15, 2011 3:43 PM

i don't hear the lyrics in pop songs much--my brain just interprets the voice as another instrument, maybe because i mostly listen to instrumental music. occasionally, i register the chorus. so, gleaning the lyrics in some of those songs used in ads was eye opening (ear opening?) Brown Sugar? holy crap

Posted by: idleprimate at April 15, 2011 5:38 PM

Both videos are top notch today, JoRo.

Posted by: Even Stevens at April 16, 2011 12:59 AM

I could never be jealous of someone who doesn't drink beer, eat cheese, or skip exercising for a day because they just don't feel like it.

Posted by: Tits McGee at April 16, 2011 1:47 PM

egregious misuse of music in commercials
---
I could never figure out Kentucky Fried Chicken using "Sweet Home Alabama."

Posted by: , at April 16, 2011 8:50 PM

For some reason I can't quite explain, I get similar feelings with regards to Paltrow and Charlie Sheen lately. Something to do with denial, just that her story is without drugs... and I mean really, really, really without drugs.

Posted by: JohnnyBee at April 18, 2011 8:52 AM

I had the pleasure of seeing Ben Folds perform Sleazy live and it is well worth donating to get some of that.

Posted by: sevenstories at April 24, 2011 1:55 PM