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Gadzooks! Who Did Kate Beckinsale Nail To Get Cast In Total Recall? Oh, The Director's Her Husband? I See.

By Joanna Robinson | Posted Under Pajiba Love | Comments (32)

kate-beckinsale33.jpeg

I never know how to hail you, gentle readers, because I’m uncertain as to what time of day you’re flipping through the webs. Well, I’ll cover all my bases. Good afternoon, good evening and goodnight! Mr. Jim Carrey will be joining the season finale of “The Office.” Are you still watching? Are you digging on what Will Ferrell is doing? Do we even care who will replace Steve Carrell when he leaves? (The Wrap)

I catch a lot of flak, my testy tech-heads, for my ancient dumbphone. Well, you cleverphone users, you, did you know your iPhone has been tracking your every move for the past year? Who’s laughing now?!?! Oh, still you? You’re watching a funny youtube video on your phone? DAMNIT, LET ME SEE! (Technolog)

Speaking of clever things, apparently the brainiacs at Brown University had nothing better to do than make lame Harry Potter jokes at Emma Watson when she tried to participate in lecture. If this story is true, I take back all the bad things I ever said about Watson, including those cracks about her stupid hair. Even if it IS undeniably stupid. (Fark)

I’ve never been a huge fan of reality television but that’s because no one ever told me about the existence of “Whisker Wars.” Can you imagine all the pomade these men must go through? I hope at least one of them is a Dapper Dan man, damnit. (Warming Glow)

Dustin is pretty head-over-ass for the up and coming flick Bridesmaids, and I have to admit I have a huge lady crush on a lot of the talent involved. The actresses did a spread for Harper’s Bazaar and while I’m not the biggest fan of the Bloodsucker Red lipstick they all seem to be sharing, I do love a good Abbey Road pose. (Evil Beet)

Speaking of bloodsuckers, the toothsome Kate Beckinsale has just won the lead in the new Total Recall film opposite Colin Farrell’s Quaid. Annnnnnnd her husband’s directing. I know my love of Underworld puts me in the minority, but I mostly love it because as a vampire Kate isn’t allowed to be as pumpkin-skinned as she usually is. Isn’t she prettier when paler? Yes. (Celebitchy)

Out of the mouths of babes, a sophisticated review of the deficiencies of the MOMA from a little girl. I agree, little one, I agree. Rawr. (Gothamist)

See my film love, Jurassic Park, is tailor-made for the video game crowd, but what if these classic films got the 8-bit treatment? I’d play “It’s A Wonderful Kung Fu Challenge” all day long. (Cracked)

It seems there is a neverending wealth of sweet nerd shirts to keep our torsos toasty until universe ends or there’s a biological meta-crisis or something similar. My two favorites this week are this “Live Fast, Die Red” shirt and this boss “Piece and Serenity” one. Would that my t-shirt budget were as neverending. (Also, would that this hoodie were a time-hoodie.)

Hey Doctor Who-heads…are you ready for Saturday’s premiere? I’ve been watching old episodes all week in preparation. NYMag has an adorable interview with the cast and some shots of them playing pinball…making The Who/Tommy/”Doctor Who” jokes both inevitable and too easy. Additionally, here’s a video from a little while back of the cast reading celebrity tweets in dubious American accents.

I know you’re all very very saavy and have likely already seen this Little Thor parody commercial, but it’s too adorably bad-ass not to share. Suck it, tiny Darth.

And should I leave you this Friday afternoon/evening/night with a video of JGL and Conan O’Brien headbanging in wigs!? Is that even a question? Does it even deserve a question mark let alone an interrobang?!

Joanna Robinson may see her first Robert Pattinson vehicle this afternoon, she blames the hypnotic charms of Christoph Waltz. Email! Twitter!









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Comments

Pretty immature of the Brown students to treat her that way, BUT if this:

"The insider says Watson didn't shy away from class participation and often would "answer something in class and get it right," calling the 21-year-old actress "really smart."

constitutes "really smart" these days, I weep for our future.


Posted by: PaddyDog at April 22, 2011 1:07 PM

Well, Beckingsdale IS a much better choice than the anorexic looking bitch they had lined-up for that part.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at April 22, 2011 1:23 PM

Wow, paddy. You must not have been in school recently. They kids are total dumbasses. . . that was a crazy 7 years of mine.

Posted by: adam at April 22, 2011 1:25 PM

Oh Flora Poste, I am still rooting for you. But I agree, you look much better when you aren't orange.


Also, I want that time travel hoodie. And Rory totally does the best American accent. I am SO ready for Saturday. Utah Who for the win!

Posted by: Anne (no longer in Reno) at April 22, 2011 1:27 PM

So Apple, Google, Facebook, Twitter and every other website, company and tech maker is desperate to Big Brother our asses all for the sakes of selling us more cheap, plastic-y shit?

Great.

Posted by: Fredo at April 22, 2011 1:32 PM

They're shooting Total Recall in my city (along with practically everything else, because it's Toronto). Let's see how this goes...

Posted by: seed at April 22, 2011 1:39 PM

Not a bad Vader/VW parody clip, there. ::yawns::

Posted by: The Wanderer at April 22, 2011 1:41 PM

They're shooting Total Recall in my city (along with practically everything else, because it's Toronto). Let's see how this goes...

Posted by: seed at April 22, 2011 1:52 PM

I'm not an Emma Watson fan, solely because I'm not a Harry Potter fan, but I have no actual problem with her(aside from being convinced she's secretly Richard Dawkins but what ever) But that is sort of totally harsh. I don't understand why people would belittle a person like that. Douchebags.

What ever, I'm sure she's not terrible worried, being a gajillionaire at all, but I hope she wasn't actually harassed out of school, that would just be awful.

Posted by: Nadine at April 22, 2011 1:53 PM

adam:

I teach a university undergrad class. I suppose I was just hoping that standards at Brown were a little higher. For my own students, I can never actually figure out if many of them really are dumb or have been told they are wonderful so many times that they believe it and don't bother trying.

Typical conversation:

Student: You have just RUINED my GPA
Me: No, you have by turning in research paper a high-schooler would be ashamed of
Student: That was easily an A-level paper
Me: Not in any semi-literate universe inhabited by people with basic research skills
Student: I'm calling my parents: they'll make you give me a better grade
Me: Let's see about that, shall we?

Posted by: PaddyDog at April 22, 2011 1:55 PM

PaddyDog... are you serious?! They threatened to call in mummy and daddy to FORCE you to give them a better grade?! What happenned to working for a grade? Or even a sense of freaking responsibility?

Appalling doesn't even begin to cover it.

Posted by: Nobody's Little Weasel at April 22, 2011 2:01 PM

"Student: I'm calling my parents: they'll make you give me a better grade"

I have no doubt that this actually happened.

I like Emma's hair.

Posted by: Protoguy at April 22, 2011 2:05 PM

hahahahaaaaaaa if I called my parents to ask them to 'make' a teacher or professor give me a better grade they would tell that motherfucker to fail me for being a hapless dumb ass.

Posted by: Nadine at April 22, 2011 2:14 PM

So I overlapped one year with Emma Watson at Brown (graduated last year), and that article got it really wrong. It was 10 points to Gryffindor, not 3.

But seriously, that didn't happen frequently - there was one story about it from the History of Modern Middle East class circling around campus, but that was about it. Most people got pretty used to her by the end of the year -much more irritating, from what I could tell from friends in common, were the persistent media reports. that she was dating this Spanish guy who was actually seeing someone else (the drama!)

Posted by: Zack at April 22, 2011 2:24 PM

"Student: I'm calling my parents: they'll make you give me a better grade"

I have no doubt that this actually happened.

I like Emma's hair.

Posted by: Protoguy at April 22, 2011 2:05 PM

Agreed on all counts. I've spoken to multiple professors, and all agree that there's an epidemic of shitty students who have no sense of accountability. I had an Economics professor relate an amusing - but slightly disconcerting story - about a phone call from an angry mother.

And I think Watson's hair is super cute on her.

Posted by: Kaleena at April 22, 2011 2:37 PM

Uh, my mom is an English teacher, granted, at a community college, and PaddyDog's story is 1000% true. Happens all the time. Kids today...

Posted by: MM at April 22, 2011 2:38 PM

I work in higher ed, and have not one iota of doubt that what Paddy relayed is 100 percent true.

I think this is where I sigh and say I weep for our future.

Posted by: tamatha at April 22, 2011 2:38 PM

Re: header picture

Beckinsale co-starred in Lars and the Real Girl? I had no idea. She showed remarkable poise!

Posted by: branded at April 22, 2011 2:54 PM

Not only have students called in their parents, one set of parent's took it all the way to the Dean's office. I refused to budge (it's a part-time gig not my full-time job so I can risk being fired) and the Dean backed me up.

On top of that, I've had a student do absolutely nothing all term long; didn't even show up in class, and then claimed she deserved a passing grade because she "paid the class fees".

Yup. She wrote me an email detailing the cost of registering for my class which, in her opinion, entitled her to a grade and threatened to sue for breach of contract.

Posted by: PaddyDog at April 22, 2011 3:00 PM

Yup. She wrote me an email detailing the cost of registering for my class which, in her opinion, entitled her to a grade and threatened to sue for breach of contract.
Posted by: PaddyDog at April 22, 2011 3:00 PM

It entitled her to a big ol' "F"

/hoping that was your reply

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at April 22, 2011 3:05 PM

Ha! Breach of contract. Oh, pre-law students, when will you ever learn?*







*They will never learn.

Posted by: superasente at April 22, 2011 3:34 PM

Ah, Paddy, now that's a story. BREACH OF CONTRACT!!

The reason I threw in that my mom teaches at a community college is, they NEVER back the teacher up fully and unreservedly. They're always leaning on the side of students who pay (admittedly smaller) tuition, since they don't really have "academic and research and publishing reputations" to uphold the way universities do. (I know there's still rampant grade inflation and an attitude of "we need tuition money so students are never wrong" at universities, but at least universities still have to pay lip service to the idea that they have standards. See: New York telling Trump "University" to stop calling itself a university.)

Fortunately, my mom will retire in two years, and then she won't have to care about the futility of trying to stem the tide of the decline of our American civilization quite as much.

Posted by: MM at April 22, 2011 4:03 PM

Now what the hell's your problem with her hair???

Posted by: Jay at April 22, 2011 4:14 PM

I just finished a two year programme studying HVAC (and bitched about it at length on another Pajiba thread several months ago), so yay me. Mind you, if I never hear someone ask the teacher how many questions there are on the test, and what percentage of the mark the test is worth, then I will die a happy man.

Also: hey guy beside me, you've been in this class for two years, and you knew there was a test today. So why are you still bumming a pencil off of me? (And for that matter, what happened to the pencil I gave you LAST time?)

Posted by: spoobnooble at April 22, 2011 5:10 PM

lawn. mine. off.

Posted by: Protoguy at April 22, 2011 5:25 PM

Protoguy, I let kids stand on my lawn, but only after they complete a spelling test including composing a 50 word paragraph with no typos. It's cheaper than building a fence, in fact.

Posted by: spoobnooble at April 22, 2011 5:50 PM

HAS NO ONE NOTICED HOW SKINNY ROSE BYRNE IS IN THOSE BRIDESMAID PHOTOS?

I AM CONCERNED.

Posted by: DontStopNow at April 22, 2011 10:10 PM

I think if you told them they couldn't do it "via mobile web", perhaps.

Posted by: Protoguy at April 23, 2011 6:31 AM

As always, JoRo, I love you for including all things JGL.

Posted by: Even Stevens at April 24, 2011 1:42 PM

Oh noes paddydog, I feel your woes.

Being a university student myself, I certainly back the sentiment that our colleges are filled with a bumbling band of buffoons (sorry had to put that HP quote in). Buffoonery, I swear.

If I have to hear one more student dully asking "What's on the test?" I swear I'm going to lose it. Whatever it is. The questions these people ask! I know, I know, "There are no stupid questions," but whomever said that clearly never attended class in modern America during midterms.

Posted by: lbeees at April 24, 2011 5:03 PM

When did people start thinking the "dazed, open-drool-mouth as if just pole-axed with a 2X4" look = sexy?

She looks like she's mentally challenged.

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