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Frances Bean Cobain Takes On A Kardashian ... And Loses? Plus Chris Hemsworth Loses The Hot

By Agent Bedhead | Pajiba Love | May 24, 2013 | Comments ()


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Try as we might, there's no escaping Fast & Furious 6 this weekend, and the fandom has officially lost it. Hence these Photoshop masterpieces of Vin Diesel as King Tut and the Mona Lisa. Yes, this shit is bananas. (Buzzfeed)

The latest K-Mart commercial is pun-filled and dirty to the point where it might make old-school David Letterman proud. Dave is still old school though, right? As a bonus, find out Dustin's crafty law school email address. (Film Drunk)

Francis Ford Coppola is returning to the Italian-American experience with a new multi-decade family saga that has nothing to do with the Corleone family. So it won't be The Godfather, and this movie is said to heavily feature "dance" as a key element. Intrigued? (Slashfilm)

I never thought I could (figuratively) fail to get it up for Chris Hemsworth, but this trailer and still from Ron Howard's Rush is destroying the magic. Whatever possessed him (or Daniel Bruhl) to play a Formula 1 driver? (Film School Rejects)

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Some doofus paid $1.5 million at the amfAR Cannes gala to take a trip into space with grumpy chihuahua Leonardo DiCaprio. But at least it was for a good cause. (Videogum)

Charlie Sheen has finally dumped the stage moniker and assumed his real name, Carlos Estevez, but only because he's starring in the Machete sequel. That's actually kind of cool. (Film Drunk)

Generally speaking, Frances Bean Cobain is a pretty cool chick and one of the only celebrity kids who isn't a glorious idiot. However, I actually think she was far too harsh in her treatment of Kendall Jenner. Great, now I feel sorry for a Kardashian. Thanks, Frances. (Celebitchy)

Here's Heather Graham working it at one of the many Hangover III premieres. The way she wears this dress illustrates why I will always have a girl crush on Heather Graham. (Go Fug Yourself)

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Just in case you forgot how much awfulness that tanning and sun damage can wreak in the long run, here's a primer. (Mental Floss)

Well, well. Teflon Ryan Gosling is no more. His latest movie got booed out of Cannes. (Grantland)

This Earth-core layer cake looks so delicious that one can easily understand why Galactus would take a huge bite out of the third rock. (The Mary Sue)

A new blind item appears to reveal that Tom Cruise is preparing to unveil his new beard girlfriend on Father's Day for a happy-family photo op. The leading candidate for many people's guesses is Julianne Hough. Look at Adam Shankman's face in this photo! He's all, "Girl, don't go there." (Dlisted)

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Ken Cosgrove tap dancing to Daft Punk? Sure, why not. (Vulture)

Some unidentified dude is attending all of the Cannes parties and convincing people that he is Psy. Perhaps this means it's time to truly retire "Gangnam Style." (Gawker)

Apropos of nothing, Ke$ha decided to drink her own pee on camera. You're welcome.

Finally and since Fast & Furious 6 is about to hit theaters (please let this be the last one), here's a recap of the franchise's previous installment in the form of an Honest Movie Trailer. "Kind of sounds like a high-speed handjob" and "jacked up on baby oil" really sums things up quite nicely.

Agent Bedhead lives in Tulsa, Oklahoma. She and her little black heart can be found at celebitchy.com.



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Comments Are Welcome, Jerks Will Be Banned


  • yocean

    So what that honest trailer is saying is that Fast Furious franchise over-rides time space continuum? Got it.

  • You know, I always thought Kesha was kind of hot, in a white trashy kind of way...but not any more. Damn, girl, there's no call to go acting like you were Kevin Costner in 'Waterworld.'

  • llp

    I wouldn't say Hemsworth has *lost* the hot, so much. He has just obscured it, but it is still there, lurking under the jumpsuit. They don't work on ANYONE.

  • chanohack

    I concur. He's got it.

  • ras

    Daniel Bruhl plays Nikki Lauda, one of the greatest Austrian sportsmen alive. So it's an honour for him, hihi.

  • e jerry powell

    "Whatever possessed him (or Daniel Bruhl) to play a Formula 1 driver?"

    Paul Newman, maybe? Tom Cruise in Days of Blunder?

    Wouldn't it be dead sexy if Martin Sheen went back to using Ramon Estevez, though?

    Heather Graham? I thought the aliens abducted her.

    Father's Day? With which kids, Nicole's or Katie's?

    To paraphrase a Truly Great American, we get to eat, we get to fuck, we get to read To Kill a Mockingbird. We don't really need Fast and Furious 6 as an additional option.

  • Maguita NYC

    Why am I the only one looking forward to that F1 movie?

    I got hooked during the Villeneuve/Schumacher debacle, and try to follow the races as often as possible. What's not to like: Egomaniacs, hot tea-cup sized men, drama, backstabbing, and a lot of costly vroom-vrooms. Try it, you'll love it!

  • Sara_Tonin00

    I love the name Ramon. But then again, I lovingly associate it with Zorro, the Gay Blade.

  • BlackRabbit

    Two bits, four bits, six bits, a peso. All for Zorro, stand up and say so!

  • Sara_Tonin00

    warms my fucking heart, I tell ya.

    You know that thing....we do...one niiiiiight, every year?

    Still have three months to go!

  • e jerry powell

    STILL DEAD SEXY. Just closer to a leather coat.

  • googergieger

    Yeah Kendall! Why you taking your first world problems to twitter while other real shit is going on in the world?! You should do the grown up mature thing when faced with first world problems and feel down on yourself for trivial things, and KILL YOURSELF...

    You know, like any normal grown up mature high I.Q. person would...

    This might be the comment that officially makes everyone on Pajiba hate me, but it was too tempting to pass up.

  • mairimba

    Officially?

  • llp

    We need a mandate?

  • googergieger

    I'm a big hit among lurkers, apparently.

  • Nah one of those upvotes was mine.

  • googergieger

    Well holey moley with a hole in it. I don't know, I heard that once during some sort of anti drug skit when I was in elementary school. Anywhoots it appears you got an upvote for admitting you upvoted me. Reckon cause that took balls and someone likes balls? Besides me that is.

  • I know it's 99% not true, but I still kinda hope Heather Graham (hot actress) is the same one who write the mystery novels I see in the grocery store checkout line. Just a silly little fantasy.

    Unlike the other fantasies I have about Heather Graham. Those are not silly, and are not fit for public consumption.

    I meant fantasies about he actress, not the novelist. Unless they are the same. Or the novelist happens to be hot. I don't know anymore.

    The comment is slowly going out of my control.

  • That comment kind of got away from you like it was a big ball of wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey...stuff.

  • chanohack

    <3

  • Sara_Tonin00

    I'm pretty sure that author Heather Graham has been around much longer than actress Heather Graham, since I remember those books from when I was a kid and my mom ran a book exchange.

    But I'm sure Mrs. Julien can suss out the truth on this one.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Heather Graham is not in my wheelhouse (of gouda).

  • dsoup

    I met the author Heather Graham when Borders was still around. She is a very nice, friendly woman - signed all her books in the genre sections. She liked to visit stores with no fan fare or big signing meet and greets. I think she just loves book stores. She is not Heather Graham of Graham Norton video fame. I have meet the actress Graham as well and she does not have time to write about 3 novels a year, I think she spends a lot of time on her hair.

  • googergieger

    Again, I love to be that guy, so...

    I was hating on Refn before the guy was getting booed out of Cannes. Director has always been in love with himself and only had an MTV art school style flair to him, and majority of people that were fans probably haven't seen others do better. He really isn't that good a director. Honestly only liked Bronson for Hardy.

  • Robert

    The Paperboy also got booed out of Cannes. It's a tradition to boo out a film at Cannes. What it means is that Refn made a polarizing film and people jumped on the bandwagon. It's like bringing toast to a Rocky Horror screening. You don't know why you do it, you just play along for the hell of it.

  • googergieger

    Never been a fan of that word. It basically means some people like it and some people hate it. Which I mean pretty much describes everything ever. It'd be more impressive if someone somewhere made something that wasn't polarizing in the slightest.

    In any case, shit director is still shit. Got into an argument a while back somewhere when someone tried to compare Drive to Bittersweet Life, and eventually we got to the point where I said maybe it's because I've seen other directors do what he tries to do better. Ki-duk Kim comes to mind. I felt The Yellow Sea did what Drive wanted to do better. Toshiaki Toyada comes to mind as well. Ugh. I actually do hate being the guy that appears to name drop and shit. So, lets just say I don't like Refn and I won't be seeing his latest flick.

  • Robert

    I'm not a fan of Refn, either. He's a director that makes action films and thinks he's above making action films, so he just mellows them out and slows them down until you have to be 100% inline with his vision to love it.

    When I use polarizing, I mean critics give it perfect scores or their lowest scores. These are films that force a reaction. Lars von Trier makes polarizing films. People are forced to react and you can't walk away without it leaving some major impression. Dancer in the Dark will destroy you, but will you appreciate the experience or resent it? Dogville and Antichrist will shock you, but do you actually want to be shocked in that way?

    Most films are not polarizing. Maybe one or two that come out each year could be considered polarizing. Others had the potential to be polarizing but never gained a wide enough audience to actually warrant that description. Like, if more people saw Stoker, there would be a huge debate about whether ambiance and suggestion is a substitute for character development and narrative. But Avatar, seen by so many people, immediately set the love it/hate it odds around whether visual spectacle can ever be a substitute for story and character development.

  • googergieger

    He is a director that is in love with himself and knows fuck all about pace. Yellow Sea was slow to boot but it worked and it actually had action and story and most importantly did have a decent pace to it. Again I've just seen other directors do what Refn is believed to do better.

    Meh you can say Human Centipede was polarizing, I say it was a lazy piece of shit that wasn't even clever enough the moment it was thought up.

    Well basically movie nerds hate Avatar, and casual movie fans, who gives a fuck?

  • Repo

    You're so cool and ahead of the curve. Please regale us with tales of who to hate on in 2014 now so we can share your sense of validation when the common folk catch up to us.

  • googergieger

    If I told you who to hate on, in 2014, I'd be helping the trendy fauxhipster dbags try even less than they do now when it comes to faking some sort of "taste". I just hate. People follow.

    It's kind of like that song, free your mind and your ass will follow. Except I hate, and people follow. With their asses.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    "I was hating on Refn before..."

    Maybe you are a fauxhipster douchebag? (Or is it dirtbag?)

  • googergieger

    Because I was the first to hate someone before it was any sort of fashionable or anti-fashionable? Blink.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    That's what hipsters are said to be saying, isn't it?

  • googergieger

    Nopes. My hate was around before and with valid reason. Hipsters just say they like and hate something before it was cool two months after the fact. Fauxhipsters are two years after the fact.

  • Martin Jensen

    Watch the Pusher trilogy.

  • googergieger

    Again?

  • PaddyDog

    Just in case you forgot how much awfulness that tanning and sun damage can wreak in the long run

    The high here at the Chicago lakefront this weekend will be 57F. I think we'll be okay.

  • lowercase_ryan

    Whatever possessed him to play a Formula 1 driver?? What possesses kids to want to be astronauts and rock stars??

  • BlackRabbit

    Days of Thunder God?

  • If he was going to play a race car driver, he should have gone with NASCAR, not Formula 1.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Not if they want to make money in Europe. And don't want the audience to fall asleep.

    "Look! They are doing another left turn."

  • Maguita NYC

    Exactly this. Watch Monaco, Montreal or San Marino's and see what breathtaking racing is all about.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...

  • TherecanbeonlyoneAdmin

    Boobs.

  • Mrs. Julien

    I can find no flaw in your logic, except for those of us who would answer "thighs".

  • TherecanbeonlyoneAdmin

    Potato/potahto

  • Sara_Tonin00

    So...Julianne Hough dumps Ryan Seacrest for richer, more famous, more Type-A workaholic overly-manscaped Napoleon-complexed faux-hetero?

    She's got a type. A very specific type.

  • Wōđanaz Óðinn

    Lighten up Frances.

  • $2786243

    Kendall Jenner is like a foot without a big toe.

  • John G.

    at least the Ken Cosgrove dancing scene makes more sense now.

  • Julianne Hough and Tom Cruise sounds about right. A manufactured "star" for a manufactured relationship. In five years I bet, and am hoping, that Cruise knocks up Taylor Swift.

  • chanohack

    OMG I can't WAIT to make fun of that song.

  • Lee

    They are so right for each other. She is the perfect stepford wife for the grinning autobot.

  • Robert

    The real life story of Rush could be an amazing film. I can't wait for someone who didn't play Richie Cunningham to make it in another 20 years.

  • Juliana William

    my bеst frіеnd's аυnt mаĸеs $61/һουr οn tһе іntеrnеt. Sһе һаs  bееn fіrеd frοm wοrĸ fοr nіnе mοntһs bυt lаst mοntһ һеr pаyсһесĸ wаs $12840 jυst  wοrĸіng οn tһе іntеrnеt fοr а fеw һουrs. Rеаd mοrе οn  ..Fox83.com

  • PaddyDog

    My thoughts exactly. It's a great story, but Ron Howard ruins everything he gets his hands on (yes, including Parenthood).

  • He's like Joss Whedon's evil twin.

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