David Beckham Is Here To Crumple Your Cynicism Into A Ball And Punt It Across The Goal Line

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David Beckham Is Here To Crumple Your Cynicism Into A Ball And Punt It Across The Goal Line

By Joanna Robinson | Pajiba Love | July 24, 2012 | Comments ()


Afternoon, my demigods and goddesses! I was just mentioning yesterday how much I enjoy the spectacle of Chris Hemsworth walking about with his tiny baby and then the good folks over at Buzzfeed gathered all the internet photos up in their brawny arms to share with you and me. I mean, look at it. His bicep is as big as the baby's head. (Buzzfeed)
hems baby.jpeg

And while you're looking at cute things, check out John and Yoko made out of Legos. LOOK AT THEM. (Retronaut)

You can look, but you can't blink. This "Doctor Who" Stare Down is my second favorite Who-related link on the interwebs today. (My first being this glorious photo of River Song.) I'm beginning to feel all wibbly wobbly in anticipation of the next season. (Deviant Art)

The Internet is still filled to the brim with Batman links so let's get a few out of the way. First of all, I loved this piece in "Vanity Fair" where Nolan gives some behind the scenes insight into the filming. It includes this photo of my favorite set piece (which was also used brilliantly in The Fall) as well as several shots from the rest of the trilogy. (VF)

And in less buoyant news, one of the victims (in that he was there not that he was shot) of the Aurora massacre is suing several people. I mean, I have sympathy for everyone involved, but this smells like a distasteful money grab. (Film Drunk)

American space hero Sally Ride passed away yesterday and maybe I'm ignorant (or maybe it's just nobody's DAMN business who someone loves and chooses to spend their life with) but I had no idea she was a lesbian. Ride's sexual orientation shouldn't matter one way or another but it did prompt this pretty tidy takedown of Mitt Romney after he was caught in some hypocrisy. (Twitter) (Homo) Sexual politics aside, Ride was an admirable figure in our nation's history and she will be missed. Her sister's touching reaction is here. (Boing Boing)

In an effort to curtail the hideous cesspool that is the YouTube comments section (or, more likely, in a continuing effort to make "fetch" happen) Google is now requesting YouTube users link their profiles to Google+, effectively removing the anonymity and attendant douchebaggery it affords. So far this change isn't mandatory, so get your poorly spelled hate speech while the getting's good. (The Mary Sue)

Here's a fun little linguistic challenge, can you identify the sexual proclivities of all the types of "Johns" from this whorehouse description of 1795? "The Back Door March" and "Willful Mistake Of Ports" aren't too hard, but when it comes to the Gomorrah Minuet, the mind reels. (Georgian Bawdy House)

Another challenge, can you find the link between all these characters? Some of them are obvious others are...I mean...who IS that masked man? (The Curious Brain)

In a nifty bit of linguistic sorcery and careful slicing and dicing, HBO has turned all the negative "The Newsroom" reviews into positive blurbs. (Forbes)

Ever wondered what the world's largest lollipop would look like? No? Too bad. Here it be in all its 6 ft, 7,000 lb glory. (Eater)

I dig this historical look at how to woo a lady through pop music and though you can probably see the punchline coming, it's worth it to stick it out until the 90s. Also, next time, can we hire Ben Folds?

Finally, I know it's a commercial for Adidas, but f*ck you it's cute. David Beckham surprises sports fans in an Olympics photo booth. TEARS ENSUE.

Joanna Robinson would let Chris Hemsworth willfully mistake her ports any day of the week. Email! Twitter!

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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • Gosh dangit David Beckham. Why are you so awesome? Why must you play for the silly Galaxy? Kudos to Beckham who worked so hard to get the Olympics to London only to be told that he couldn't play for his own football team. And he's still out promoting goodwill and all that. And the little boy was awesome.

  • TheOriginalMRod

    I am pretty sure Rick Astley was wooing a dude in that song... just sayin...

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Beckham starts to look like Ricky Gervais.

  • mona_sterling

    Today is my birthday and I'm happy to accept the gift of David Beckham in whatever hackneyed way it is presented. That man's purdy.


    My ovaries exploded. Oh, look! the article had a helpful little gif illustrating what happened.

  • athena23

    We wants the Hemsworth, Preciousss...we needs it...

  • Sara Habein

    Aw, well played indeed, David Beckham.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    I just saw Sally Ride's obit about 20 minutes ago. Makes me sad. I too had no idea she had a female partner - because she kept her private life private. She asked NASA not to reveal her cancer. She also had the Sally Ride Foundation include the mention of partner in her obit. Regardless of whether she was lesbian or bi (she was married to a man for a while), she was someone I looked up to as a child. I'm a little teary-eyed that she died fairly young. I'm also grateful in a sense that her death afforded the chance to remind us all of what passion, class, intelligence and drive can be worth. She was around at the right time for some amazing opportunities, and she certainly seized them.

  • annie

    Cuteness: How to sell shit (and Beckham) to me. I thought I saw somewhere that Ride was actually bisexual, not a lesbian. Didn't get a chance to look into that. Does anyone know? Not that either diminishes her accomplishments or general badassery.

  • lowercase_ryan

    Not sure what's worse; that I knew the world's biggest lollipop was an American made monstrosity or that I saw it and was disappointed that it was one of "those" things I don't even consider a lollipop? Seriously, why does See's even make those?

  • csb

    The Adidas thing may have been cute if they hadn't done it to death already.

  • zyzzyva

    "The Fall" didn't use sets, but actual locations around the world. The steps you're thinking of are from the stepwell Chand Baori in Abhaneri, Rajasthan India. The Batman set definitely looks to be inspired by that location.

  • zyzzyva

    Forgot I could add images now...

  • JoannaRobinson

    Yes I'm aware it's a real location (having listened to The Fall commentary track one gajillion times), but cheers!

  • zyzzyva

    Figured you did, as I seem to remember you being a fellow The Fall/Lee Pace devotee. Just wanted to help clarify for the Bat-people. The imagery in that film is so stunning that I fear most just assume expensive sets and CGI were relied on. Which is such a shame, really. Truth being stranger than fiction and all.

  • Maguita NYC

    Has anyone noticed how POLITE everyone was in the Adidas bit!!! No one squealed like a pig, no one screamed, no one jumped like a high-on-crack monkey, and no one, no one, uttered a F*ck.

    What the motherf-ck??? Are all Brits that polite, or is the Adidas Marketing team that offensively discriminant? Too polite. How the f-ck?

  • GunNut2600

    You're seeing at best maybe 2% of the people they probably filmed. They aren't going to show the people acting like idiots, the crazed soccer fans that try to pick a fight with Beckham over his performance in some random game, or the folks who clearly don't give too shits to me him.

    In my limited experience overseas, there is nothing like British soccer fans over here. There are teams whose fan clubs are more criminal gangs than anything else. Its a small group of people, but the Brits can be as violent and crazy as anyone else.

  • Nadine

    Aaaaah the crying little boy, MY EMOTIONS.

  • BierceAmbrose

    Mashup fail. You reference Rick Astley & don't link to that video? Fail. Fail. Fail.

    And another thing ... I don't need amateurs on YouTube to screw up decent ideas with lame, self-indulgent execution. This is what we have an entertainment industry for.

  • TK

    Comment fail. You reference Rick Astley and don't link to that video?

    Son, I am disappoint.

  • BierceAmbrose


  • the other courtney

    The Addidas thing is cute but I can't think of a single person that would reduce me to tears at the mere sight of them. Except my dad ('cause he's dead. Then I would probably scream and get a pitchfork because ZOMBIE). Or maybe my husband if he had been missing at sea for weeks. And I needed the garbage taken out.

  • SorayaS

    Have you never cried from adrenalin? If I met my hero I probably wouldn't cry at the sight of them but after having 30 seconds to say hello and take a picture and leave I might shed a tear just at the whirlwind of excitement and shock and sheer inspiration.

  • Didn't get a chance to look into that. Does anyone know? Not that either diminishes her accomplishments or general badassery...StartProjectMillionaire.blogspot.com

  • Can we dry-erase Tits McGee over here?

  • Oh Work Web Block, thou art so fickle. Apparently the Film Drunk link is "Pornography", but they care nothing about the Flogging Cull.

  • mswas

    It's awfully dusty in here.

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