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Conan Drops Some Wisdom On The Dartmouth Kids, Neglects To Explain Why He Stupidly Shaved His Beard

By Joanna Robinson | Posted Under Pajiba Love | Comments (28)

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If there’s one thing I know about my Pajibans, it’s that they love bacon. Most of them. Either that or our vegan readership is very demure and quiet (not the usual vegan MO). Well have I got a totally useless thing for you! It’s PajiBacon, our website as Ron Swanson intended it. (PajiBacon)

You know how everything is better with bacon? Sammiches, salads, and even chocolate? Do you think that’s true about all our favorite artery-cloggers? Are these Mac n’ Cheese Waffles inspired or disgusting? (Just Jenn)

Speaking of inspiring, check out these Life Lessons Learned From Dance Movie Taglines. You know what life lesson I learned? Hollywood will slap a “2” on anything. (The Shiznit)

Ah, but as we well know, not every sequel is a mistake. Here are some great deals on sequels including The Back To The Future Anniversary Trilogy on Blu-Ray, and, via SlickDeals, some, if not all, of the Rambo flicks. I’m actually most excited about the deal on Stargate, I can’t really explain my fascination with that film. (Slick Deals)

Ah, but in the world of inexplicable fasciations, no one beats this subset of men who enjoy watching the “My Little Pony” television show. I’m not surprised these men exist (to each his own!), but I am surprised that they exist in such quantity as to have earned a nickname. Thanks to mswas for bringing the plight of the “Bronies” to my attention. (Neatorama)

Though, if they made a “Game of Thrones: Muppets Edition,” I would absolutely watch it. The guyliner on Animahl Drogo is fabulous. (Game of Thrones Muppets)
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Speaking of fabulous and guyliner, you know I have much love for the gay community. Tracy Morgan’s recent homophobic schtick made me super pissed and while I’m slightly mollified by Tina Fey’s humorous and intelligent response, I’m still debating whether I can watch Morgan on “30 Rock” next season. (Evil Beet)

Ah, but I will never leave you, CoCo. Even beardless you are all that is sexy, smart and cool. Watch Conan’s fantastic Dartmouth commencement speech. Don’t worry, he addresses the bizarro lumberjack podium. (Celebitchy)

The smart, sexy cool folks over at AudioSuede are hiring! Oh, sure, they only pay in hugs, but if you’re musically inclined and want to tell the world about it, here is your platform. (AudioSuede)

The smart, sexy, cool Chez Pazienza takes a HuffPo writer to task for this piece on why, if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, you should make an Ugly Man your Wife-er Husband. (Deus Ex Malcontent)

I will readily admit that this FreddeGredde cat is sort of creepy, but I’m blinded by my love for Queen. So here he is, creepily cloned, singing all the parts and playing all the instruments for “Killer Queen.”

Joanna Robinson keeps her Moët & Chandon in a pretty mini-fridge. Ya know, so it’s always chilled and ready.









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Comments

One of my local friends talked about how she was going to a cousin's (or some such random relative) graduation at Dartmouth and at first I was all, "Oh, graduation ceremony, ugh." Then she mentioned Conan was speaking, and the sympathy turned to jealousy. She's also a thin, attractive Broadway actress so she already gets tons of my jealousy. I need more loser friends, I think.

Posted by: pickled tink at June 13, 2011 1:56 PM

Hi! I'm Logan.

Posted by: logan at June 13, 2011 1:58 PM

Grown men fascinated with MLP is just strange. The PowerPuff Girls, however, kick ass.

Posted by: BierceAmbrose at June 13, 2011 2:08 PM

HI Logan.
Do you like waffles?

Posted by: Ms MoMo at June 13, 2011 2:09 PM

I am not a vegan, but I do not have a deep love for bacon, nor do I think that bacon makes everything better (at ALL). Especially chocolate. Chocolate is perfect just as God made it.

Posted by: jimbob at June 13, 2011 2:24 PM

Dammit! That first link is dangerous; I nearly broke my fingers against my monitor. I'll just be glad I wasn't wearing 3D glasses; I'd still be swiping at thin air.

Posted by: thenemophilist at June 13, 2011 2:30 PM

I like the GoT Muppets pictures, but I LOVE the Lost and "Community" pictures that the same guy drew. They are badtastic.

Posted by: Pinky McLadybits at June 13, 2011 2:32 PM

Thanks for the Shiznit link, that site will keep me busy for days!

Posted by: Laura at June 13, 2011 2:36 PM

Hi Mo Mo! I'm more of a french toast guy.

Posted by: logan at June 13, 2011 2:41 PM

Grown men fascinated with MLP is just strange.
---
Perhaps I can explain.

Late at night sometimes, the classic rock radio station in my town will play a phone-in game called "Porn or Pony," in which the caller is given a name such as Wysteria or Rarity, which BTW are Ponies -- and I had to look up these examples on the MLP site ... really! No, really, I had to look them up, I didn't know them at all, I ... ahem, I digress -- and has to identify the name as either a porn star or a My Little Pony.

If the caller is correct, I do not believe he wins a porn star OR a My Little Pony, but it would be interesting to see what losers who would call a classic rock radio station late at night to play "Porn or Pony" might choose. If a little bit icky either way.

Posted by: , at June 13, 2011 2:56 PM

I’m not surprised these men exist (to each his own!), but I am surprised that they exist in such quantity as to have earned a nickname.

Live and let live and all, but I can't deny that it's a bit disconcerting.

But "Bronies"? At best they're "Ponerds". However, I'll be referring to them as "Elmers".

Posted by: branded at June 13, 2011 3:00 PM

Bacon's disgusting. You scrubs should take a day off from entertaining yourselves & learn about how the average pack of bacon is made. It's abhorrent, & a crime against nature.

Posted by: the new transported man at June 13, 2011 3:10 PM

Off topic, and I'm sure Pajiba will get to it soon, but the Television Critics Awards were announced, and they're pretty righteous. They fill in some gaps that we (the discerning Pajiba public) anticipate from the Emmys.

TCA Awards list

Danny Pudi!
Terriers even though it was cancelled!
Raising Hope!
Louie CK!

Posted by: MM at June 13, 2011 3:43 PM

Bacon: the most delicious crime against nature you will ever put in your mouth.

Posted by: The Bean at June 13, 2011 3:46 PM


The Bean,

Nice.
Imaginary Hat!

Posted by: thenemophilist at June 13, 2011 4:17 PM

Hi Logan! I like muffins for breakfast. Muff for short. (NOT A EUPHEMISM, ODNON! THAT MEANS EXACTLY WHAT YOU THINK IT MEANS.)

Funny bacon story from this weekend: Me and new dude I'm seeing went out for whores de vores before dancing, and we wanted to order the bacon wrapped dates. Which he ordered as Bacon Raped Dates. Cut to hilarious, loud laughter (from me of course, DUH) and many jokes about the poor date getting porked. Good. Times. With. Bacon.

jimbob, if God didn't want us to enjoy bacon with everything, why did he make it so versatile? IT IS HIS WISDOM, ARE YOU QUESTIONING THE GOD OF BACON???

*SHUNNNNNNNN*

Posted by: boo at June 13, 2011 4:33 PM

I'm more of a french toast guy.

Eeeee! Looks like AvB's got a new crush!

Fuckin' FRANCH TOAST.

Posted by: Anna von Beav at June 13, 2011 4:40 PM

Thanks for the new word thenemophilist!

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at June 13, 2011 4:44 PM

Say, The Bean, I wonder, do you wonder how yy is today?

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at June 13, 2011 4:52 PM

Boo - I also enjoy the muffin. Blueberry to be exact.


AvB - Powdered sugar or no?

Posted by: logan at June 13, 2011 5:00 PM

yy is probably getting coffee in the secure government instillation where they keep us Pajiba-semi-lurkers until we can be released into the wild as fully fledged commenters. It's pretty great here, they provide us with free bagels.

Posted by: The Bean at June 13, 2011 5:30 PM

yy is probably getting coffee in the secure government instillation where they keep us Pajiba-semi-lurkers until we can be released into the wild as fully fledged commenters. It's pretty great here, they provide us with free bagels.
And I might start 'Imaginary Hatting' myself in the mirror when I need a pick me up. Thanks thenemophilist!

Posted by: The Bean at June 13, 2011 5:31 PM

I'll be honest, logan, I'm more of a maple syrup girl. THE REAL STUFF, not that crappy 'allegedly maple flavored' corn syrup impersonator. HOWEVER, I do enjoy the first few bites without, and powdered sugar is lovely.

Also, I didn't get any free bagels, and now I'm disappointed.

Posted by: Anna von Beav at June 13, 2011 6:36 PM

P.S. Every now and again, I do like Mrs. Butterworth's, for some odd reason. I guess it's like how maybe once a year I like to pick up some olive loaf and make a sandwich out of it, whereupon I remember how gross it is and swear to never buy it again. But then, a year later....

I probably just lost the last ounce of 'cred' I had, didn't I?

Posted by: Anna von Beav at June 13, 2011 6:40 PM

(...she said, as though she'd had any 'cred' to start with...)

Posted by: Anna von Beav at June 13, 2011 6:48 PM

yy present. Just patrolling the neighborhood. Ignore me. They served bacon today at the compound along with the bagels. These are the things you regular commenters miss out on.
Imaginary Hook Hands to all.

Posted by: yy at June 13, 2011 7:02 PM

AvB - Total agreement on the maple syrup and NO podered sugar for me. The real stuff is best. Tho I too have had my dalliances with Mrs. Butterworth. I hope Mr. Butterworth is not a reader.

Posted by: logan at June 14, 2011 10:17 AM

Number of times I wish I had accepted Dartmouth's Likely Letter has officially gone up to one (okay, maybe three for winter festival and the Green Monster). The Ivies always get the best freaking speakers for Commencement. Just do an MIT/Harvard comparison. Ugh.

Posted by: Cam at June 18, 2011 2:00 AM