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Beyonce Laughs At The "Low Life People" Who Criticize Her, Plus Cheeky Billboard Fashion

By Agent Bedhead | Pajiba Love | May 20, 2013 | Comments ()


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Is anyone actually surprised that Kanye West's new album has been revealed to be titled Yeezus? The dude has a serious god complex and believes that he walks on water, but wait! He's merely slip-sliding though the leftovers from Kim Kardashian's sex tape. :rimshot: (Vulture)

Apparently, there were seven big questions that were left unanswered by this weekend's Star Trek: Into Darkness. Such as why Benedict Cumberbatch was wearing pants? I didn't see the movie yet, but I'm assuming a spoiler alert should be involved with clicking this link. (Film School Rejects)

Are these really the nineteen dead-giveaway signs that you're a homebody? I think 90% of you would qualify based upon #6 alone. (Buzzfeed)

Ke$ha attempted to pull a Gwyneth Paltrow by showing off a great deal of her ass at the Billboard Music Awards last night. In a far subtler move, Selena Gomez demurely revealed the tiniest hint of boob curve. (DListed)

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As a bonus for the relatively tame Billboard madness, this GIF of Taylor Swift grossing out at the Justin Bieber/Selena Gomez public-kissing session is the best thing that Taylor Swift has ever done. (DListed)

Daft Punk's first album in eight long years (the score for Tron: Legacy doesn't count, yo) will hit both online and brick-and-mortar stores tomorrow. Does the hype really justify the hype? (Grantland)

Who hasn't wanted to defenestrate a fellow theatergoer's cell phone during the height of frustration at rudeness? Columnist Kevin Williamson of The National Review has done just that. (Uproxx)

Nope, that wasn't Adrien Brody playing Julia Louis Dreyfus' ex husband on "Veep," but it damn well could have been. What a doppleganger. (Warming Glow)

Dwayne Johnson himself has revealed that Marvel is strongly considering him to play a certain Marvel character. Hopefully, his incarnation of Luke Cage will rip his shirt off with great frequency. Tell me, comic geeks, can The Rock pull this role off? (Slashfilm)

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Beyonce has a thing or two to say about the "low life people" who think she used a surrogate for her first pregnancy. Of course, there is absolutely nothing wrong with surrogacy, but why fake a pregnancy with pillows and then continue to deny it after the pillow collapses on live television? (Celebitchy)

Truer words have never been spoken: "James Franco is really living the dream of every guy who couldn't decide whether to major in English or Film or not go to college and just create shitty art in a loft somewhere." Now go watch Franco murder William Faulkner in the As I Lay Dying trailer. (Videogum)

Surely, you have known a child who has decided to marry her pet dogs to each other, right? My daughter did so at age 5 when she declared our (male) Yellow Lab to be the "awful wedded wife" of our (also male) German Shepherd. Well, here some photos and videos of monkeys and frogs getting hitched. (Mental Floss)

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Some very creative artist has whipped up a series of comic book covers that reimagine musical "icons" (Morrissey included, really?) as superheroes. Admittedly, I'd love to see the Johnny Rotten cover if and when it surfaces. (Unreality)

After seven wonderful years of relative, food-centered bliss, some corporate lawyers hired by Nutella have officially cancelled World Nutella Day. (The Mary Sue)

Not only does Ian Somerhalder always wear the same permasmirk and creep nearly everyone out while doing so, but now he dresses like a creepy Vegas lounge lizard. (Go Fug Yourself)

This is a lovely video from the "Dr Who" Fan Orchestra, who are performing "Amy's Suite." Feel free to totally dork out while watching this if this show is your thing.

This is a not-so-lovely video of Tan Mom starring in the "Tan Mom" video. God, I don't understand this shit at all.

Agent Bedhead lives in Tulsa, Oklahoma. She and her little black heart can be found at celebitchy.com.




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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not


  • e jerry powell

    "...the best thing that Taylor Swift has ever done."

    Setting the bar low, are we?

    "Tell me, comic geeks, can The Rock pull this role off?"

    Where's the acting? It's all legs, arms, and breasts. Sign him already.

  • Pepper Fish

    Hate to break it to you, kid, but John Lydon is Johnny Rotten's real name. After the Sex Pistols broke up, he went on to form PiL (Public Image, Ltd.). It's an interesting picture of him nonetheless.

  • e jerry powell

    ANGER IS AN EN-ER-GY
    ANGER IS AN EN-ER-GY
    ANGER IS AN EN-ER-GY
    ANGER IS AN EN-ER-GY
    ANGER IS AN EN-ER-GY
    ANGER IS AN EN-ER-GY

  • Mrs. Julien

    You don't hate to break it to us, you are loving every minute of it!

  • Pepper Fish

    Ha. Only a small part loved it; the rest of me got depressed just thinking about how old I am.

  • Ben

    Tan mum looks a lot less tanned.

  • Lindsey Withan'e'

    Crikey, that Star Trek review was terrible. There are legitimate gripes to be had with the film, but those were hardly even valid for debate.

  • John W

    "awful wedded wife"

    Out of the mouth of babes....

  • MissAmynae

    and me. well, husband. Thank god there's no video.

  • googergieger

    Didn't a dude fucking leg drop someone at that shitty award show? I mean granted I didn't watch it. Just have seen the gif. But I mean, like if in any award show ever, someone leg dropped someone in the effin throat. You'd have to assume, that'd be the story or event everyone would be talking about the next day. I mean even if you literally only watch award shows for the fashion and have a blog or show dedicated to just talking about fashion. If someone almost killed someone via leg drop at an award show. You'd have to pause and at least mention it. Then again, maybe I'm just an old fashioned guy like that. The kind of old fashioned guy that prioritizes leg dropping someone to almost death at an award show, above what some two women/girls with horrible fashion sense were wearing.

  • I think The Rock could pull off Luke Cage, but if they do a Luke Cage movie, it should be the disco Luke Cage from the '70's. Sweet Christmas!

    Although, in the spirit of the whole 'a black guy might play Johnny Storm' brouhaha that blew up last week, I also think this guy should be given a shot at the role:
    http://farm8.staticflickr.com/...

  • Bert_McGurt

    I still would have preferred him as Black Adam over in DC, but that ship ain't sailing for at least a few years (I think he'd make a great villain for a JLA movie, but I assume they're going to just use Darkseid for the first installment because of course they will). But life is too short to wait the f*ck around while the most superhero-looking actor in the WORLD is in prime hero-ing shape. So Luke Cage it is!

    *If, of course, he can challenge your fine suggestion for the role. I mean, he DOES already have the costume.

  • simplysarah

    Confession - I have never eaten Nutella. I am told that I should try it but quite honestly, I'm scared of addiction. Last thing everyone around me forced me to try left me in a year long binder...

  • Mrs. Julien

    dear ms. simplysarah,

    You are so brave, I feel I owe it to you, and to myself, and to my loved ones, to make my own confession: I hate Nutella. I hate hazelnuts in any form. They befoul all they touch. I would almost rather eat a parsnip than a hazelnut. If you have ever been forced to eat a parsnip, you will recognize the profundity of that statement. I did not make lightly.

    Thank you for your example, simplysarah. I'm free now.

    Yours in Christ,
    Mrs. Lysander Julien

  • e jerry powell

    I feel the same way about peanuts in Kung Pao anything. Peanuts only belong in butter and Thai food.

  • BWeaves

    I love chocolate covered nuts, but when you start pureeing everything together, it gets disgusting. You're not missing anything. I love Ferrero Rocher. Hate Nutella. Same ingredients. Go figure.

  • F'mal DeHyde

    Try cashew butter, you'll change your mind...

  • BWeaves

    Nope, I tried it years ago. I'm just not a fan of nut butters.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    But the inside of Ferrero Rocher is pretty much Nutella.

  • BWeaves

    I know, but the Ferroro Rocher has some crunch to the outside and the very inside. Again, I did say, "Go figure."

  • Sara_Tonin00

    But....so...if you put Nutella on something crunchy, what happens?

  • e jerry powell

    A stargate opens.

  • Mrs. Julien

    You're a stargate.

  • e jerry powell

    But only with Nutella.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Wait, what? Your description of the Beyonce thing doesn't at all appear to be what the Celebitchy article is about. They seem to be saying she's pregnant again, or faking being pregnant again, and make it sound like that's what she responded to.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Why do people think Beyonce faked a pregnancy exactly? She rigourously protects her privacy and image and tries to strictly control what the public sees. She hasn't sold baby (or wedding) photos to any magazines to the best of my knowledge. There were no "body after baby" articles and she was photographed post partum looking, well, post partum. She's not a publicity vulture celebrity, and if she were, she could have spun a surrogacy into cover stories about "the precious gift" the surrogate had given her. It makes no kind of sense. I find it all so illogical. Beyonce may be shrewd/cynical/cunning in the manipulation of her public image, but she doesn't seem cynical in the way she's being accused of.

  • $2786243

    I think a lot of it is the collapsing belly footage. There may be a rational explanation for it, but at first blush, it doesn't look good.

    I'm sympathetic to her to some extent-- I know they acknowledged multiple miscarriages. I think the idea behind the fake pregnancy is that Beyonce is used to succeeding at whatever she wants to do, "Girls Rule the World" kind of thing, and her image is based in large part upon that sense of power--and control (which you referred to). If she had to use a surrogate, then admitting that might be akin to admitting that she 'failed' and didn't have as much control as she thought she did. (I was in a similar boat w/r/t to fertility, so I get that sense of powerlessness.)

    I have no clue what really happened, and it's not really my business one way or the other, but *if* she did, in fact, use a surrogate, I wish she'd just own it; the more people that 'come out' of the infertility closet, the better.

    That baby is obviously both of theirs biologically, though. And crazy cute.

  • Mrs. Julien

    I just think that the amount of effort it would take to fake a pregnancy and post partum recovery would require a level of crazy not even the most narcissistic celebrity could manage. It's too insane.

    Your argument about powerlessness does make excellent sense and I am sorry that you had to go through that.

  • $2786243

    Thanks. (We were lucky that it ended well for us.)

    You're right about the effort involved to keep up the ruse, and the simplest answer is usually the right one, so she probably did just have the baby herself and that's the end of the story. (Then again, never underestimate the power of the celebrity PR machine and how hard it's willing to work to support a particular image. Exhibit A: Cruise, Tom.)

  • John G.

    David Pasquesi was the therapist in Groundhog Day.

  • Candee

    I'm not a huge Star Trek fan (really enjoyed this new movie though), but I felt that pretty much all of those gripes can be squared away if you actually paid attention to the movie.

  • I'd write a rebuttal to the list detailing how each is explained in the context of the film (except for the lens flare one, seriously how is "I don't like lens flare" an unresolved question?), but the writer clearly paid so little attention to a movie he paid to see that I doubt his ADD could allow him to read an entire paragraph.

  • Tinkerville

    Burn! Steven Lloyd Wilson for the win. Seriously though, I almost stopped reading after the first question, which is answered in the first two minutes of the movie. It just got stupider from there.

  • lowercase_ryan

    Totally mature and justified reaction on the part of Taylor.

  • $27019454

    Like monkeys weren't creepy enough.

  • Slash

    This. Monkeys are too close to human to be cute. It's not their fault. It's totally me (and, I guess, a few other people).

  • Mrs. Julien

    The chain on the "groom's" collar is making me very sad.

  • Mrs. Julien

    We have a new game at our house in which we add "monkey" to the names of things. "Monkey lotion" is my favourite to date.

  • fribbley

    The Rock can pull off any role he wants to!

  • Maguita NYC

    "Since Taylor was dressed up like a damn figure skater, I give her ICK NAST face all 10s!"

    If only the great John Hughes was still around so he could make a movie about these kids!

  • e jerry powell

    Perish the thought. Molly Ringwald would have to play someone's mother.

  • Sherry

    I am annoyed with Taylor Swift for actually doing something that makes me like her. Harrumph.

  • That's the most genuine thing I've ever seen her do. I still want her to go away.

  • $27019454

    And close her mouth. She looks like a half-wit with her gaping maw.

  • e jerry powell

    Are you suggesting that Taylor Swift is more than a quarter-wit?

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