web counter
 

¡Feliz Cinco De Mayo, Gael García Bernal! Bésame Mucho, Tú Eres Mexicaliente.

By Joanna Robinson | Posted Under Pajiba Love | Comments (28)

27010-mexico_nbsp_gael_garcia_bernal_the_motorcycle_diaries_mother_too.jpeg

I was going to celebrate this Cinco De Mayo the same way I did St. Patrick’s Day, with reverence, respect and photogenic actors. However, the internet is not bearing any fruit when it comes to a satisfactory list of Good Looking Mexicanos. Any list that has Uma Thurman but neither Diego Luna nor Gael García Bernal is a list I cannot get behind. So, well, we’ll have to make do with this. (Salma Hayek)

There are scads of ways in which I am ignorant about other cultures, mis amigitos. I do know, however, that I probably shouldn’t tell you that I refer to this holiday as Cinco De Puke-o. Right? That’s fairly insensitive. I also had no idea that May 1st was an international day of protests and workers rights. No clue. I thought it was all about jumping over fires and sex with randos. Well, regardless, please take a moment to check out these staggering images from around the world of May Day protests. Some are harrowing, some are comical, and some are just gorgeous. (The Big Picture)

This photo is a little less political and a little more calisthenical, but this entry from the Hipster Arrested Development Tumblr made me laugh out loud. STEVE HOLT!
jonathanallandavis.tumblr.jpeg

But when it comes to mixing politics and “Arrested Development” references, no one does it quite like the Angry Black Lady. Get out your poster board and protestin’ sharpies for this story because some reprehensible Texan “educator” asked a Muslim 9th grader if she was grieving for “Uncle Osama.” He’s been suspended, I say that’s not enough. I say we EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE! (Angry Black Lady)

See, I lucked out. Instead of a racist sh*thead, I had a romance novelist for a 9th grade teacher. You better believe I read all them books. Those things are educational! (Persephone Magazine)

Speaking of higher education, this “How Long Would You Survive A Campus Zombie Outbreak Flowchart” thinks I, a much-beloved and cherished RA, would only last 6 hours. Ha! That’s because they don’t know about my Crovel. Those zombies are so getting written up. (Nerd Approved)

We all know zombies enjoy a tasty medulla oblongata or a crunchy cerebellum, but what part of the body are you most partial to? If you’re a gent, I hope you’re partial to those testy testes of yours. The people at I HEART GUTS want you to take care of ‘em. Me? I’ve always been fond of ze uterus. So expressive! (Laughing Squid)

I fear I’ve written myself into a testicular corner. That’s awkward. Non-sackuitur! Thanks to mswas for bringing this great contest to my attention. The first person to correctly identify the 91 movies represented in this Manhattan Map will get a free copy of the poster. If one of you lovely, bored, clever, filmophilic Pajibans doesn’t win, it’ll be a BIG disappointment. That’s your first clue. GO! (Gothamist)

I have to admit, it was sort of a BIG disappointment when I found out what “Archer“‘s H. Jon Benjamin looks like. Aisha Tyler (a.k.a. Lana Cane), on the other hand, never fails to impress. Here are ten other faces to go with the voices you know. (Warming Glow)

I love the “Archer” theme song, though it’s not my current favorite. That would be either “Justified” or this “Game of Thrones” cover. Count the guitars/basses and get back to me on a total, okay?

Yesterday reader Christian H made the good point that by highlighting Minnesota House Majority Leader Matt Dean and his Neil Gaiman debacle I was ignoring several great Minnesota politicians currently kicking ass and taking names. So let’s all give a slow clap today to Minnesota State Rep. Steve Simon who took a stand for gay rights asking “How many more gay people does God have to create before we ask ourselves whether or not God actually wants them around?”

Joanna Robinson hopes you enjoy Cinco de Puke-o as much as she will. Her sure-fire Margarita recipe is three parts tequila, two parts triple sec and one part fresh-squeezed lime juice. ¡Disfruten! ¡Email! ¡Twitter!









Each Time You Like, Share, Tweet or Stumble a Pajiba Post, An Angel Does the Paul Rudd Dance

← Battle of the Terrible Trailers: Ironclad vs. The Ledge | Glee Goes 3D: No. →









Comments

Non-sackuitur!

I can't stop laughing at this.

Posted by: Jeni at May 5, 2011 1:10 PM

Set up: Robot destroys entire world. Punchline: Robot feels awkward. Must destroy the world. EXTERMINATE!

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at May 5, 2011 1:13 PM

I also had no idea that May 1st was an international day of protests and workers rights.

Americans totally fail on this. If you grew up before 1989, you probably remember the yearly May Day parades local news showed of Red Square or Cuba, linking workers' rights & unions with Evil Communism.

May 1st has been an international workers' rights holiday since before the turn of the century, and was chosen because of it's proximity to the Haymarket Massacre, among other labor events.

Americans, ever paranoid of the Red Menace, celebrate Labor Day in September, where its associated more with school breaks, changing your wardrobe, and the beginning of fall.

Posted by: idiosynchronic at May 5, 2011 1:18 PM

Every time I see "Cinco De Mayo" I think that I'm missing out on a new and fabulous mayonnaise invented by Mexico. Like, tequila mayo or, taco mayo or perhaps even sombrero mayo. I'm inevitably disappointed when I realize exactly what it is. Then I go and kick three babies for even suggesting that I not further the use of cultural stereotypes.

I guess the moral of the story is that Mexico hates babies and Corona is made from chihuahua piss.

Posted by: admin at May 5, 2011 1:25 PM

"I fear I’ve written myself into a testicular corner. That’s awkward. Non-sackuitur!"

I wouldv'e gone with Cul-de-Sack

Posted by: Don Carlos at May 5, 2011 1:37 PM

Thank you, "idiosynchronic" person. Please teach me more.

Posted by: Jay at May 5, 2011 1:39 PM

Americans are just the worst, aren't they, Jay?

Posted by: RobP at May 5, 2011 1:48 PM

Jay, that brown puckered thing is your asshole. Back out of it.

Posted by: idiosynchronic at May 5, 2011 1:54 PM

"Americans....celebrate Labor Day in September, where its associated more with school breaks, changing your wardrobe"

And then when you move to American from another country and wear white clothing on, say September 12th because it's 90 degrees outside, they all gaze in horror because it's after "Labor Day". How can rules for clothing be made based on arbitrary American holiday dates?
Don't wear white before Memorial Day? Memorial Day in most of Europe is November 11th.

Posted by: PaddyDog at May 5, 2011 1:57 PM

I'm not seeing Snake Plissken anywhere on that map of Manhattan!?

Maybe my eyes just need checkin' though, it does seem kinda blurry.

Posted by: MurderBot at May 5, 2011 1:57 PM

Oh wait! There he is in that boxing ring!

All is well now.

Posted by: MurderBot at May 5, 2011 1:59 PM

Rep. Simon:

About a billion more. I haven't had a date in eighteen months.

Posted by: Jerry at May 5, 2011 2:02 PM

PaddyDog: Those people aren't "Americans", those people are "Idiots".

Posted by: RobP at May 5, 2011 2:10 PM

Not only did I get a hat tip, but after such a delicious pun as 'Non-sackuitur' - I'm in heaven.

Hope a Pajiban wins!

Posted by: mswas at May 5, 2011 2:21 PM

Snooty?

Snotty!

Posted by: Jay at May 5, 2011 3:11 PM

You seem to have written that you like the "Justified" theme song. I just wanted to point out this error for you so you can fix it ASAP, lest people think you actually like that terrible song that in no way captures the tone of the show.

Posted by: jess at May 5, 2011 3:42 PM

I was going to say how lucky I was that all my teachers growing up were cool and then long repressed memories came speeding to the surface like a freight train. Never mind....

Posted by: John W at May 5, 2011 3:55 PM

sigh-I'm going to count the Justified theme song as a guilty pleasure. I know that everyone would feel better if there were a traditional artist warbling the theme, or a cherished chestnut being lovingly rendered so that everyone can feel appropriately intelligent, but the raggedy grating edge of that theme sets the tone nicely. I can fully see Coover and Dickey listening to it in that shanty with it's flat screen, Xbox and bong resin.

Posted by: Mrcreosote at May 5, 2011 4:08 PM

Those people aren't "Americans", those people are "Idiots".

Or Kathleen Turner in Serial Mom. But other than that, idiots.

Posted by: MM at May 5, 2011 4:09 PM

I think the non-traditional feel of the Justified song is perfect for that show. There's a whole modern/old south clash feel to the show.

Posted by: Paultera at May 5, 2011 4:59 PM

Gaiman lives in western Wisconsin, close to the greater Twin Cities area.

He lives in the same town as my parents, and I never knew?!

I'm never forgiving any of you for keeping this information from me. I don't care that no one knew where my parents live. STOP MAKING EXCUSES!

Posted by: branded at May 5, 2011 5:21 PM

never ignore your testicles.....or those of your partner. he will thank you.

a quick look at that manhattan map and i see citizen kane and king kong. how am i doing?

i do like that game of thrones song but the justified one not so much.

Posted by: splinter at May 5, 2011 7:23 PM

Gracias por la fotografia de el hombre mas delicioso del mundo -- mi Gael. Me oyes? La mia. Mia.

Cinco de mayo es cojo. Gael no lo es.

Posted by: klingonfree at May 5, 2011 8:16 PM

ugh. not moar gheys.

Posted by: gp at May 5, 2011 11:38 PM

State Rep. Simon is amazing. Just the fact that he had the poise to express his argument completely and clearly. . . . Nice work, and we* need many more like him.

*Not a "gay" we. A "humanity" we.**

**or actually, i guess it is a "gay" we since the gays are included within humanity. . . right?

Posted by: adam at May 6, 2011 12:25 AM

That poster is my favorite thing today, which is saying a lot since I'm newly obsessed with Philosoraptor.

Posted by: stopthemadness aka the beetus at May 6, 2011 5:47 AM

I used to be team Gael, and then I must have slowly changed over the years because I'm all team Diego these days. I still wouldn't push Gael out of bed for eating biscuits, though.

Posted by: Caspar at May 6, 2011 7:00 AM

Thanks for making me smile at the end of long and stressful day.

Posted by: Anisa Blackham at June 20, 2011 1:59 PM