A Pajiba Love with That Extra Special Ingredient

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A Pajiba Love with That Extra Special Ingredient

By Courtney Enlow | Pajiba Love | April 9, 2013 | Comments ()


Be cool, my babies. Sit back, relax and enjoy a nice Chowder-tini (very dirty). I hear it goes down easy.

In sad/potentially fake news (this is Radar) apparently after learning of Creepy Joe's gay affair, Tina Simpson, mother of Jessica and Ashlee, threatened to kill herself and Joe. I hope it's fake because I really feel like we shouldn't know about that. If it's true, I feel dirty knowing that it happened. (Radar)

In news that's an entirely different shade of terrible, Seth McFarlane apparently has fat cell-murdering jizz (I bet it's a tip from Semenology) and has landed another incredibly stunning beauty that we actually like, Charlize Theron. (Celebitchy)

As a fantastically awkward palate cleanser, here's Aubrey Plaza on "Ellen" being socially weird, but delightfully so. (Uproxx)

Do you Pinterest? You totally should (I post lots of recipes and DIY things I'll never do) if only to follow the official "Parks & Rec" Treat Yo'self Pinterest board. Wine station?! NEED. (Pinterest)

The loss of Roger Ebert hit all of us hard. But as someone who left her heart in Chicago (I keep it in several pieces along Broadway near Belmont), this piece by James Hughes (son of John) touched me good. (Slate)

I assume other people MUST listen to the infinitely wonderful podcuddle Walking the Room, and this is old news from the beforetime of last week, but I didn't do PLove last week so SHUT IT, but, after a lengthy break, the show returned on Easter, making me laugh and cry as we find out what exactly went on that killed the show for a while. Long story short, Greg Behrendt, after 15 years of sobriety, had a relapse. A bad one. Greg and Dave Anthony talk about what happened in a way that is so funny and honest that I urge each and every one of you to listen to it right the fuck right now. (Walking the Room)

Rick Santorum thinks gay marriage is "suicidal" to the GOP. Well then, pass around the elephant-shaped cyanide tabs, my friend. (Salon)

Look. The loss of Director Wolfdog hit me hard. But these new Old Spice spots ease the pain a bit.

Brad Paisley Defends "Accidental Racist," Reminds You He Has a Black Best Friend | 5 Shows After Dark 4/9/13

Are you following Pajiba on Facebook or Twitter? Every time you do, Bill Murray crashes a wedding.

Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • Bodhi

    Oh that is some sad news about Greg Behrendt. I don't listen to Walking the Room, but that is for sure going on my too listen list. I think GB is a great comedian & his story is really good. I hope that hes gotten control of whatever spurred his relapse.

  • hippyherb

    I should not have read the comments first thing in the morning. I now do not want to eat breakfast. Ugh. Very funny, but ugh.

  • bleujayone

    That was odd.

  • e jerry powell

    Well, you created quotation marks at some point. Like Magic!

  • bleujayone

    Hey look honey, it's the church that Tom Cruise is REALLY a member of...

  • Jami


    I'm going to have to come back and look at the rest of the links, because the first one left such a bad taste in my mouth.

  • The Replicant Brooke


  • e jerry powell

    Pun intended, I'm quite sure.

  • TherecanbeonlyoneAdmin

    That's why you always spit at a tasting. Never swallow.

  • TherecanbeonlyoneAdmin

    Placenta cookbook or GTFO!

  • Well, you can go here to learn how to make Spicy Australian Placenta, Placenta with Broccoli, or Placenta Stew ...


    Or here is a feature article on placenta eating from NY Mag:


    Key tips for DIY'ers:

    “After I gave birth, I threw a chunk of placenta in the Vitamix with coconut water and a banana,”

    She will prepare one half according to the traditional Chinese method: wrapped in its membrane and steamed in a pot with a knob of ginger, a whole lemon, and a jalapeño pepper ...

    Hughes describes her husband as an “adventurous eater,” but when they heard that a friend served his wife’s placenta jerky at a party, Doug said he thought it was “a bit much.”

  • e jerry powell

    Call me a culinary purist, but I'm still all about keeping it simple.

  • L.O.V.E.

    Placenta perfume or GTFO!

    Afterbirth Perfume by Grace Jones


  • e jerry powell

    I thought most people just ate it like steak tartare.

  • TherecanbeonlyoneAdmin

    Sooooooo pedestrian.

  • If you're on the hunt for the seminal work on semen, don't forget that spooge can go in your food as well as your drink:


    From the book description: "Semen is not only nutritious, but it also has a wonderful texture and amazing cooking properties. Like fine wine and cheeses, the taste of semen is complex and dynamic. Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants. Despite all of these positive qualities, semen remains neglected as a food. This book hopes to change that. Once you overcome any initial hesitation, you will be surprised to learn how wonderful semen is in the kitchen. Semen is an exciting ingredient that can give every dish you make an interesting twist. If you are a passionate cook and are not afraid to experiment with new ingredients - you will love this cookbook!"

  • Danar the Barbarian

    Having a (hurk) ... difficult (gluhhhhch) time typing any kind of (hurk) response. SO. MUCH. NAUSEA.

  • Drake

    I'm pretty sure I saw that movie in a quarter-slot booth.

  • alwaysanswerb

    I bet this includes a great ballognese, or a saucy twist on a classic cumprese?

    I'll see(men) myself out

  • Genevieve Burgess

    "has a wonderful texture"


    That's about all I have to contribute here.

  • e jerry powell

    Oh, GB, you're just precious!

  • Genevieve Burgess

    If we're using "precious" to mean "possessing an aversion to high viscosity fluids" then yes.

  • e jerry powell

    No, I meant you're precious.

  • Maguita NYC

    You mean to tell me his spunk is lump??

  • BWeaves

    I clicked on the link. The reviews of the cookbook are hilarious.

    " I gotta tell you though the Cream of Sumyoungguy is not for the faint
    of heart. It called for 1/2 cup of the err, special sauce. She said it
    was divine but honestly, I was just too tired to eat."

  • "commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants."

    Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat? Restaurants?

  • Joe Grunenwald

    You saw FIGHT CLUB, right?

  • Maguita NYC

    Now you know what they mean by Sauce Robert or Sauce Espagnol.

  • e jerry powell

    Watch out for the Bananas Foster, too.

  • lowercase_ryan

    Inexpensive to produce...

  • e jerry powell

    Not always.

  • TherecanbeonlyoneAdmin

    The economy had been very hard on the semen farmers. Consequently, they've had to sell a lot of of their heard and many of their milking machines causing a shortage and resulting price increase.

  • Maguita NYC

    Which also explains the decrease in gross incum this past quarter.

  • TK

    I have a lot of jokes -- a LOT -- but none of them are good. So I'll just... I'll just be on my way. Because yikes.

  • The Replicant Brooke

    Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, no. No.

  • e jerry powell

    That's usually how it sounds, if I remember correctly. I've been involuntarily celibate since just before my 41st birthday, so maybe it sounds differently now.

  • Mrs. Julien

    I am making such a face right now.

  • e jerry powell


  • I bet you are.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Aaaand you're back.

  • Pants-are-a-must

    Old Spice commercials are what you get when you have writers talented enough to write on any TV comedy doing ads instead.

  • BWeaves

    You know the reefer Joan smelled on Mad Men Sunday night? The Old Spice ad men were smoking it.

  • lowercase_ryan

    I want them to get an episode of The Following.

  • dizzylucy

    Oh no, that show is plenty hilarious on it's own.

  • L.O.V.E.

    That's why I never drink a wine bottled at a seminary.

  • Maguita NYC

    Actually, it was at a seminary that I learned the proper way to decunting younger ones for aeration, and filtering older ones for removal of bitter sediments.

  • L.O.V.E.

    Do you mean to tell me you would see men squeeze their grapes until the juices spurted out, then mix their juices with a yeast source, and then turn this juice/yeast soiree into a full bodied, bubbly, overpriced Cristal featured in music videos and porn movies, alike? Sounds about right.

  • Maguita NYC

    And now you know how a Pinos Noir is produced.

  • L.O.V.E.

    Is that pronounced "Pinos No-are" or "Pinos No-where". Sorry, I'm a prick when it comes to dicktion. Don't you find sementics fascinating?

    Ok, I'll show myself out.

  • Maguita NYC

    It's Pinos No-areeeuh from the French Burcunty region.

  • L.O.V.E.

    First of all, Isn't that pronounced Pinos No-urea?

    Secondly, I didn't realize that French Burcuntyness was limited to a particular region. I always figured the whole country was fertile ground for Burcunts - particularly the male vines.

  • Maguita NYC

    Although the seed of Burcuntyness is quite widespread, there is only one French Burcunty Region. And as you may very well know, the male vines are good for producing vintage Merdot.

  • L.O.V.E.

    And the female vines for producing Rosé.

  • e jerry powell

    So educational! And scientific!

  • Amanda B. Cabral

    uptil I looked at the receipt 4 $9302, I didnt believe that my brothers friend could realy taking home money in their spare time on there computar.. there aunts neighbour haz done this for only twenty two months and by now repaid the loans on their mini mansion and got a top of the range Jaguar E-type. I went here, Big31.com

  • e jerry powell

    See? SLUT!

  • L.O.V.E.

    I know! In one post I note that Mad Men may have been influenced by Blake's, The Marriage of Heaven and Hell, and in the next I make semen jo ... I mean, I teach you how to make wine.

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