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The Male G-Spot

By Dr. Pisaster | Posted Under Pajiba Dirty Talk | Comments (53)



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I covered the female prostate last week, but it occurs to me that most people aren’t much more familiar with the functions (and pleasures) associated with the male version, beyond the usual bathroom humor or a bit of personal experimentation. Which, of course, is a shame since the more you know about your body the better chance you have of maximizing your sexual pleasure. The anatomy of the male prostate is considerably better understood than that of the female version. The prostate is a gland a little larger than a walnut that surrounds the urethra. It is located between the bladder and the base of the penis and rests against the front wall of the rectum. Inside the prostate the ejaculatory ducts merge with the urethra and during orgasm sperm is transmitted through these ducts into the urethra. The prostate itself is surrounded by muscles that contract during ejaculation, and it has some smooth muscles of its own that aid in the ejaculation process. Its primary function is to store an alkaline fluid that composes about a quarter to a third of the volume of semen. The purpose of this fluid is to neutralize the acid environment of the vagina, which would otherwise kill sperm before they had a chance to reach an egg.

Of course, the most interesting thing about the prostate for the purposes of this column is it’s potential to induce mind-blowing orgasms. As most of you are probably aware, at least some men are able to have orgasms from prostate stimulation, earning it the nickname of “the male G-spot.” This term is probably more accurate than many people realize, since the male prostate is analogous to the gland most likely responsible for the female G-spot and men who experience prostate orgasms describe sensations similar to women’s descriptions of G-spot orgasms. For the record, a lot of the information that follows is anecdotal, as I wasn’t able to find any studies that focused on this aspect of the male prostate. Unfortunately, the scientific community seems to be less interested in the male G-spot than the female one. That said, the ability to orgasm from prostate stimulation is well established within the medical and scientific community. Electrical stimulation of the prostate is used in animal husbandry to collect samples of semen from male livestock for breeding programs and prostate massage is frequently used by urologists to gather fluid for tests.

The prostate can be stimulated directly through the anus and somewhat less directly through the perineum (that’s the less crude term for what’s commonly known as the taint). Stimulation through the anus can be achieved using fingers, standard dildos and vibrators, or toys specifically designed to reach the prostate. When using a finger, the idea is very similar to stimulation of the female G-spot - insert the finger into the rectum and gently massage the prostate with the pad of the finger using a come-hither motion. The prostate is highly sensitive and some men are able to reach orgasms through prostate massage alone, while others use prostate massage along with penile stimulation to enhance their orgasms. Of course, many men are reluctant to stick something up their ass (to put it in the least delicate way possible), but if you’ve never tried prostate stimulation, you should definitely consider it. Most men who engage in it report that the orgasms are stronger than orgasms from stimulation of just the penis. Furthermore, orgasms from prostate stimulation involve a flow of seminal fluid without ejaculation, which opens up the possibility of multiple orgasms.

There are a number of reasons why men might be reluctant to try anal play to stimulate the prostate, some of which are reasonable and some of which are not. For some men, the prostate may actually be too sensitive for massage to be comfortable. Others may have prostates too insensitive for them to derive any significant pleasure from stimulation. There’s also the hygiene question (though in my experience this is something of a red herring, since for many men this concern goes right out the window when the ass involved belongs to someone else) but those who are truly worried about it can relax. Feces are not stored in the rectum except just before expulsion. As long as you don’t have anything on deck or didn’t eat bad Mexican food for dinner, you’re probably safe (although there is still bacteria to contend with, so always wash your hands/toys after any sort of anal play). The more common reason for men to resist this sort of sexual play, however, is the feeling that receptive sex - sex where you’re the one that something is being inserted into - is strictly the province of women and gay men. This is especially fraught for some men when the person doing the inserting is female, since it involves a role reversal that a lot of men just aren’t comfortable with. Gentlemen, I think most women, and a significant number of gay men, would agree with me when I say that receptive sex can be awesome (You should give it a try boys…lot’s of men love it. Maybe you would too if you just relaxed about it. Come on just try it, just once. For us…Maybe on our birthday?). There’s also a sense that this sort of thing is transgressive, since not a lot of heterosexual men talk about it, but many men both gay and straight do enjoy it in the privacy of their own bedrooms. The truth is, it’s not dirty or weird; it’s just another way to experience sexual pleasure.

You shouldn’t ever do anything sexual you really aren’t comfortable with, of course, but it’s silly to deny yourself sexual pleasure just because you’re afraid it doesn’t seem masculine. If you do decide to try it, there are lots of ways to experiment and find the degree of stimulation you’re comfortable with. Buy some toys and try it on yourself if you aren’t comfortable doing it with a partner. If you do want to explore it with a partner, prostate play can involve anything from manual stimulation to full blown anal sex (with a strap-on if your partner is female, natch). It may be a little uncomfortable at first, but you might just find that you love it.

Dr. Pisaster has a doctorate in biophysics, not actually anything sexy. She does however enjoy having sex, reading about sex, and talking about sex. Especially when she’s had a little whiskey.









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Comments

male orgasms through prostrate stimulation? been there, done that....again and again and again...

Posted by: splinter at August 17, 2010 4:16 PM

I'm fairly certain you could never find a straight male who will talk about this in public.

Posted by: Dustin Rowles at August 17, 2010 4:28 PM

Is Pajiba considered public? Because I bet several of these naughty boys will open up, as it were.

Posted by: Patty O'Green at August 17, 2010 4:31 PM

Cleanliness can't be dismissed so lightly. I know what I get up to in the bathroom and it is horrible. I go through at least three toilet brushes and a pack of pipe cleaners every week trying to scrub my crevasse. On the other hand, I'm not so worried about her hygiene because I prefer to believe girls don't poop.

Posted by: Tracer Bullet at August 17, 2010 4:33 PM

You know, it occurred to me after last weeks article, that if the gland responsible for female ejaculation is analogous to and of similar composition to the male prostate....why do women never get "prostate" cancer? As common as prostate cancer is in men, it would seem that at least sometimes women would get cancer of the same gland, and yet (despite the fact that I work directly with cancer patients) I have never once spoken to a female that developed cancer of that gland.

Posted by: peachfish at August 17, 2010 4:33 PM

Why would straight men not talk about it, DR?
It's a pretty nice addition to the sexual repertoire and one that Mrs. Spender has employed on many occasions... because it works and it IS mind-blowing.
Be absolutely certain that your partner has clean and well-trimmed fingernails before attempting it and, if it's your first time, use a lot of lube.
And RELAX, dammit.

Posted by: Spender at August 17, 2010 4:37 PM

You know what they say: A douche a day makes the tops wanna play!

But seriously, regular anal cleansing (let's call it that) is a goddamn LIFESAVER. It's like brushing your teeth after a while. If you can find a rhythm with it (it can take about 15 minutes if you do it right) it'll exponentially strengthen your sex life.

Posted by: Jeremy Feist at August 17, 2010 4:38 PM

I'm a straight male and I have no problem with it. I have many friends who cringe at the mention of it but I tell them basically what Dr. Pisaster said. "Just let a girl stick her finger in there once while she's going down on you. You'll change your mind."

Posted by: Paul at August 17, 2010 4:49 PM

"Just let a girl stick her finger in there once while she's going down on you. You'll change your mind."

Seconded.

Also, I've been married for twelve years and have three kids, if you guys think a finger in the butt is scary, you haven't seen shit.

Posted by: admin at August 17, 2010 4:52 PM

if you guys think a finger in the butt is scary, you haven't seen shit.

...And you sure as hell won't if you douche properly!

Posted by: Jeremy Feist at August 17, 2010 4:57 PM

i not only KNOW where my prostate is, i have named it and send it cards on appropriate holidays. we even lunch on the fourth tuesday of each month! prosty is a good friend and great listener. in fact, i need to go text him back. ta!

Posted by: gp at August 17, 2010 5:09 PM

Y'know maybe if I had many a coital session which ended with me having to fake it while my other half got what she wanted I might reluctantly consider this direction. Thankfully I get all that I ever want through the conventional means and do not have to consider otherwise. It's just as well.

I don't care if it brought me a mind-blowing orgasm that came with it's own spotlight, fireworks display, Boston Pops Orchestra and Vienna Boys Choir, ain't nobody taking that route with me. Butt City's metro limits is an exit ramp only. This has little to do with the article's suggested homophobia and more to the simple fact that I DON'T LIKE ANYTHING STUCK UP MY ASS! Just a personal preference. Oh well, my loss. I guess.

I felt bad enough when I've had to get that unfortunate examination that way- and that at least is a necessary evil. Do you really think I want to get fingerbanged by someone with sharp sculped nails and who's still mad at me for forgetting to take the trash out? Actually, it still wouldn't matter even if she didn't because again I DON'T LIKE ANYTHING STUCK UP MY ASS!

The point is while this may very well be a satisfying method for some, I really don't feel like I'm missing out on anything. I haven't walked on the moon either, but somehow I believe my life could be just as rewarding without that fulfilled.

Posted by: bleujayone at August 17, 2010 5:20 PM

Douching is good, but a proper diet helps too. Not to put too fine a point on it, but fiber helps stuff... coalesce..., making it easier to get everything out when the time comes.

Beyond that? Just close your eyes, breathe deep, use plenty of lube, and relax.

Posted by: jeem at August 17, 2010 5:38 PM

The things you learn on Pajiba. I never knew men could have orgasms from prostate stimulation alone (I don't think I fall under that category, sadly), nor did I know I was supposed to be douching my ass regularly.

Posted by: jimbob at August 17, 2010 5:51 PM

Gah. I had a conversation about this with a bunch of straight people once. They were all completely mystified. Unsurprisingly, the guy there with the most latent homosexuality was the only one who was vehemently opposed to the idea. The rest of them were intrigued by the idea of more powerful orgasms.

The girls just thought it was gross. They're not what you'd call cosmopolitan.

Posted by: Smokin at August 17, 2010 6:09 PM

RE bleujayone: Ditto here (I'm a chick). And sorry, I have no interest in sticking my finger up someone's ass, either. To each his/her own... If that's not cosmopolitan enough for some people, too bad.

Posted by: Slash at August 17, 2010 6:28 PM

Tried it plenty of times (fingers, dildos and vibrators), always with the exact same result; immediate ejaculation with no orgasmic sensation. Which just kinda makes me feel cheated out of something.

Posted by: greg at August 17, 2010 7:13 PM

I brought it up to an ex once. Let's just say he was less than receptive.

Posted by: Jen, K. at August 17, 2010 7:26 PM

Whats wrong with all of you ?

Has america come down to this that we are talking about sticking fingers up someones ass ?

This is the morality and decadence which america has stooped to and very soon doctor pisaster would be advising us on bestialty and telling us
that "You shouldn’t ever do anything sexual you really aren’t comfortable with, of course, but it’s silly to deny yourself sexual pleasure just because you’re afraid it doesn’t seem masculine."

Fuck you Dr pisaster.

Those of you who have not got repulsed by this article I suggest you give a thought about what happenned to Sodom and Gomorah.
If you think thats a fantasy then God bless you with wisdom and understanding so that the veil is lifted and you can see the end times which are upon us all ...

Posted by: forerunner at August 17, 2010 9:31 PM

Oh dear... foreskin is poking the bear

Posted by: Porkchop Express at August 17, 2010 9:57 PM

Surely this "forerunner" is throwing chum off the boat. I can't remember if this person comments frequently, but only someone very new to this site could expect any back-up for such a self righteous sentiment. I'm male and straight and I seek out the best orgasms I can find, be they conventional or otherwise. And if you haven't tried it, do it alone until you get more comfortable with it. Especially you bluejayone. I used to feel the same way.

Also this column, no matter what the topic, is a highlight of my week. Keep it up Dr. P!

Posted by: jesuschrysler at August 17, 2010 10:18 PM

Posted by: forerunner at August 17, 2010 9:31 PM

Huh who let O'Reilly on the site again? I thought you said it was a GUEST spot?

Seriously though, on an intellectual level and on a general sexysexyperv level, I can totally dig what you are saying, Doc. But it is kinda unfair to (even unconsciously) equate an unwillngness to do such things with some sort of homophobic hangup.

Look, as much as I want to go on a little rant about sexually self-repressed folks like me (and maybe I will later), it isn't exactly encouraging to hear stuff like:

You should give it a try boys…lot’s of men love it. Maybe you would too if you just relaxed about it. Come on just try it, just once. For us…Maybe on our birthday?

I mean, isn't that the kinda bullshit men use on women to get them to do stuff they aren't comfortable with? Even as a joke, that is still crappy to say.

Like bleujayone said, regardless if it is man, woman, deer, or the Buddha offering enlightenment through the brown path, I just don't want anybody or anything playing up there. If your man like sit, yay for him. That's his ass, not mine.

And one thing people seem to be glossing over is that as a society, while we are constantly bombarded with messages about the woman needing to get off, nobody give a crap about men doing so. No woman has to worry about a man faking it, but the reverse is considered the most humiliating thing imaginable. Women deserve the tricks and the toys and the whatnots, while men are constantly pressured to satisfy any woman every single time he is with with no help whatsoever. So for this oh so male-dominated society, a lot of sexual knowledge and conversation is focused on the woman.

And all that social programming is treated as a joke. For all this talk about a great male orgasm, this post seems to skip over the pretty important idea that nobody really cares about the male orgasm.

I really don't mean to be snippy or anything, it just seems ridiculous to say stuff that, if a man said it about women, this place would be burning by midnight.

Posted by: Vermillion at August 17, 2010 10:18 PM

I might have to agree with vermillion here. While I agree with what Dr. P said above, on an intellectual level this...

You should give it a try boys…lot’s of men love it. Maybe you would too if you just relaxed about it. Come on just try it, just once. For us…Maybe on our birthday?

does sound like something someone says after doling out a healthy (or unhealthy) dose of rohypnol. Men only need to get it up to orgasm right? Mood or atmosphere don't really matter. We just need viagra and wet hole.

Posted by: jesuschysler at August 17, 2010 10:29 PM

Wait - so on one hand you're upset that no one cares about male sexual satisfaction (*coughViagracough*, and on the other hand, Dr. Pisaster shouldn't put together a post about how to vary and possibly increase male sexual satisfaction because no one cares about male sexual satisfaction?

Posted by: Three-nineteen at August 17, 2010 10:39 PM

If you remember there was a dirty talk column not long ago about the female orgasm and how it takes the right mood and atmosphere. It takes more than just physical sexual stimulation to reach climax, atleast for a majority of women. As was discussed before, viagra only helps men get erect, it does not enhance their sexual pleasure in any way, although a hard dick does help a lot. My point was that I agree with Vermillion in that if the comment were reversed and said male to female in regards to butt sex, the tone of this discussion might be different. Some ment though are just as dependent on a narrative or the mood to get off as some women are.

As far as Dr. Pisaster and her columns go, I love all of them. I said this before. They are a highlight of my week and an excellent source of frank enlightened discussion on topic not many people are willing to discuss openly. I suppose the relative anonymity of the forum helps. i was surprised to see Rowles' comment. Given his affinity for the male mid-section, I thought he would be a little more open to this discussion, but then again, he's not anonymous.

Posted by: jesuschrysler at August 17, 2010 10:55 PM

I'd love to stimulate my prostate, but I lost it 6 years ago. No, it didn't move to another part of my body, I had prostate cancer and chose to have a radical prostatectomy. Let me tell you, no aspect of sex is the same after that... I could go into details, but I will spare you all.

But on the plus side, I'm 6 years cancer free this month, so yay for me!

P.S. I actually asked at the time if I could have my prostate back in a jar or something, but the doctor just laughed at me. Biotch. I could be stimulating it right now.

Posted by: Uriah Creep at August 17, 2010 11:00 PM

Ha, Vermillion, jesuschrysler, I put that little joke in precisely because men (yes, plural) have said those things to me with regard to anal sex (Seriously, the birthday anal request is a classic). Lots of guys have no problem proposing it to women but when the shoe's on the other foot they suddenly are horrified. And I do sympathize with the guys who've tried it and found it doesn't do anything for them, because that's how I feel about my own ass. This is extremely pleasurable for a lot of men, but your mileage may vary.

Posted by: dr. pisaster at August 17, 2010 11:16 PM

Fair enough jesuschrysler. I'm just not sure what a bad joke has to do with assuming a man doesn't need the right mood or atmosphere to enhance his sexual pleasure, or the post for that matter.

Posted by: Three-nineteen at August 17, 2010 11:25 PM

Wait - so on one hand you're upset that no one cares about male sexual satisfaction (*coughViagracough*, and on the other hand, Dr. Pisaster shouldn't put together a post about how to vary and possibly increase male sexual satisfaction because no one cares about male sexual satisfaction?

No, I'm upset that Dr. Pisaster (who is usually quite accommodating to the mental and emotional sides to sex) seems to write off societal pressures on men as far as sex is concerned as being nonsense or homophobia. She is basically telling us to take hundreds of years of what was taught as essentially sexual dogma and get over it. The "nobody cares" statement was to the effect of society in general, not the good doctor. But even in this post, she demonstrates that many people (even ones quite educated in such matters) easily assume that men want to get off any way they can and just need to be told how to, with no real consideration that maybe the subject isn't as simple as that.

And as I tried to say, Viagra and its ilk are marketed to men only in the context of satisfying a woman. Even the commercials have women breathily exclaiming how size matters and such. A man is expected to perform at full strength, so to speak, no matter his age or health or what have you. It is no longer "hey, I'm old, time to take a siesta on the bed-rocking", it is expected that a man wants to and will have sex well into his golden years. Otherwise, it is considered a dysfunction.

That is my complaint.

Posted by: Vermillion at August 17, 2010 11:25 PM

On second review, I must admit that I am attributing a lot to Dr. Pisaster that she didn't really indicate. A lot of this "get over it" vibe I am picking up is coming more form the comments, and she does at least give service to the idea that people just might not be into such things. So I do apologize for that.

But my point still stands. People are really quick to assume that men don't have pressure when it comes to sex. Even when they are trying to be accommodating, it comes off as condescending.

Posted by: Vermillion at August 17, 2010 11:50 PM

Getting f****d in the ass every single day by The Man isn't enough? Now I have to go f**k myself? I don't think we'll all fit.

Posted by: IJ Reilly at August 18, 2010 12:44 AM

I've been reading this site for a long time. Only recently have I ever posted any comments. Most of them were on the lost threads for season six. Its quite satisfying to elicit a response from other people. I get that the Dr. was joking with that particular phrase. I didn't see the sarcasm behind it, but knowing now that the Dr. was mocking the way other men have tried to get her to spread the cheeks, it's actually pretty funny.

Posted by: jesuschrysler at August 18, 2010 1:14 AM

Nipple play gets me off.

Next week?

Posted by: , at August 18, 2010 1:59 AM

So I'm guessing I won't be giving too many rim jobs here, right?

Posted by: Jerry at August 18, 2010 3:29 AM

I had an ex say, if you let me fuck you in the ass (with a strap on), I'll let you fuck me in the ass.

I said go for it.

She didn't take me up on the offer.

Posted by: DeistBrawler at August 18, 2010 3:52 AM

Darling hubby had his prostate removed last year to cancer. His orgasms suck now. Part of that is due to cutting of nerves, but mostly due to the removal of the prostate itself.

Posted by: BWeaves at August 18, 2010 9:04 AM

I tried the finger thing years ago while drunk in the shower and did NOT like it. And believe me, if I don't like a sexual move when I'm drunk, I sure as shit won't like it sober.

Also, prostate checks were just introduced into my physicals, so there's that discomfort to look forward to until I'm dead.

Posted by: Kballs at August 18, 2010 9:57 AM

I'd just like to add that orgasms via perineal or anal stimulation are real, and they're spectacular. And they don't make you gay or mean you're a repressed homosexual -- not that there's anything wrong with that. It's not something I do all the time, just when the mood strikes. Like this weekend (yes, for my birthday); yadda yadda yadda, I was really tired the next day. In a good way.

Also, I'm fairly certain Dr. P was clear that actual insertion isn't really necessary. In fact, for your first time, it probably is best if you find someone to massage or use a vibrator on the perineum. Or, play with yourself. Just be comfortable. And like others have said, if/when you do feel like graduating to the next step: Lube Up and Relax.

As for the "controversial" statement, just think of it like this: Don't ask to play with someone else's bum if you they cant play with yours.

Posted by: RobP at August 18, 2010 10:27 AM

Oh! And like the guy in the header picture knows all-too-well: Multiple O-Faces are indeed possible.

Posted by: RobP at August 18, 2010 10:28 AM

With two different boyfriends I've definitely experienced the desire on their part to have anal sex with me, but 100% total denial that they might derive pleasure from a similar experience. I've even had a close male friend ask for advice on how to get his girlfriend to be willing to take it up the ass, and when I suggested that she might be more open to it if he was as well, he thought I was insane to ever suggest something like this.

I really don't understand this aspect of anal play, and thank Dr. Pisaster for the ideas about receptive sex. I never really thought of it from that perspective. But as a woman who is willing and occasionally enjoys it, I find it extremely frustrating when my partner is completely closed off to the idea.

Posted by: zygomatique at August 18, 2010 11:32 AM

(You should give it a try boys…lot’s of men love it. Maybe you would too if you just relaxed about it. Come on just try it, just once. For us…Maybe on our birthday?).

Now what everyone needs to do is say FUCK YOU DR. Pisaster.

I dont want anything stuck up my ass. Wonder what the hell our society has come to that Dr. Dumbass feels that he can advise us on where to stick something up our ass.

While we are at it , FUCK YOU DR PHIL:

So do whatever you can and spread the word!!!!

Posted by: Splinter at August 18, 2010 3:42 PM

"Now what everyone needs to do is say FUCK YOU DR. Pisaster."

Who the fuck are you to tell me what I need to do?

Posted by: Craig at August 18, 2010 4:52 PM

I am your daddy craig and your my little whiny bitch ,thats why.

So be a good little bitch and say and say Fuck you Dr Pisaster

Posted by: splinter at August 18, 2010 5:28 PM

Tell Him You Want To Be Treated Like A Hooker: Yes believe it or not that will turn on men. Tell him you want to be a bad girl and you want him to treat you like a hooker. Say you want to feel like you are his hooker and you will do anything he wants. However, you expect a big pay back! It's going to cost him.

Posted by: Dirty Talk Ideas at August 18, 2010 8:07 PM

Splinter Dr. Pisaster is female. And WOW what a huge reaction you have there! *snicker*

Posted by: Snuggiepants at August 18, 2010 9:54 PM

The ExHub Loved it. I am TOTALLY DOWN with it. You don't HAVE to go internal for heavens sake, as specified in the 'taint' clause.
Ass is great, RECIPROCATE! Just remember:
Relaxation, Communication, Lubrication.
What the hell is up with the trolls?
'e' OUT!

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at August 19, 2010 2:08 AM

Fuck you, splinter.

Posted by: Rykker at August 19, 2010 5:04 AM

Say you want to feel like you are his hooker and you will do anything he wants. However, you expect a big pay back! It's going to cost him.

Yeah, that shit costs like $50 extra!

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at August 19, 2010 5:33 AM

$35 for cash?

Posted by: peanut at August 19, 2010 5:35 AM

American? Deal!

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at August 19, 2010 5:43 AM

Post more, 'e'. So much more. And earlier. I always get a kick out of it. It ain't a party if you taint misbehavin'!

Posted by: RobP at August 19, 2010 5:04 PM

I can attest to the fact that receptive anal sex can be awesome for a guy (as it is for me), but self-stimulation of the prostate just isn't the same for some reason.

I found that I can induce an "orgasm" just by massaging my prostate, but it almost feels like pulling the trigger to release fluid, and doesn't have near the impact of simultaneous prostate and penis stimulation.

Posted by: Vince Noir at August 19, 2010 7:20 PM

My wife has been doing it to me since we got married. I ask her to do it and she loves assaulting my a**(that's what we call it).She gets as much from it as i do. We use a double ended dildo so she can get off while she gets me off. And YES the orgasm is mind blowing. It might not be for everyone but it is something we really enjoy.

Posted by: docabear at September 3, 2010 11:17 AM