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Look Ma, No Hands!

By Dr. Pisaster | Posted Under Pajiba Dirty Talk | Comments (32)



Lady+GaGa+x_099d8c2b.jpg

The ability of some women to have orgasms just by thinking really hard is making the news rounds again lately, thanks to a throw away comment by Lady Gaga, who told an interviewer she frequently uses this method of self-pleasure. The idea is simple: some women can get themselves off without any physical stimulation, just by thinking about whatever turns them on (others can achieve orgasms by manipulating pelvic floor muscles, but that doesn’t quite count as purely mental). Given our culture’s fascination with the mysterious female orgasm, this ability tends to draw a lot of attention. And of course science has stepped in to study the phenomenon.

Specifically, Drs. Komisaruk and Whipple of Rutgers have used MRI scans to look at the brains of women during both mental and physical orgasms. Previous studies had shown that the general physical responses to orgasm - increased heart rate and blood pressure, pupil dilation, and increased pain tolerance - were identical to manually obtained orgasms for women who thought themselves off. The MRI results showed the same similarity - the same parts of the brain were active in women during orgasms regardless of whether the orgasm was induced physically or mentally. Specifically the nucleus accumbens (involved in reward circuitry), paraventricular nucleus of the hypothalamus (involved in the release of mood enhancing hormones oxycontin and vasopressin), hippocampus (this one, oddly, is involved in long-term memory storage and spatial navigation - the fantasy component perhaps?), and anterior cingulate cortex (involved in motivation and emotional responses) showed increased blood flow during orgasms for women in both groups. The only exception was the amygdala - which did not light up during thought orgasms. The researchers speculate that this is because the amygdala is involved in sensing physical sensations in the genitals. All of this indicates that 1) the brain’s response to orgasms is highly complex, and 2) mental orgasms cause the same responses as physical ones and therefore are “real” orgasms (in case you were doubting).

Interestingly, the thoughts used to induce orgasms varied greatly between women. The researchers describe them as ranging from erotic to pastoral to abstract. Interviewees in the Daily Mail get a little more specific - some women fantasized about sexual situations, while others imagined sensual, but not sexual, activities like walking on a beach. At least one women seems to have her body so well trained she can basically just command it to have an orgasm and…voila! It seems that for some women this ability comes naturally while for others it can be learned. Many women find they can orgasm involuntarily from the mental stimulation of dreams. Having waking mental orgasms is simply a matter of being able to deliberately replicate this phenomenon, and probably a good number of women could do it if they took the time to figure out how. The keys to learning seems to involve complete relaxation and figuring out exactly what gets you hot in the right ways. Based on the descriptions of women who can induce mental orgasms, this won’t necessarily involve strictly sexual scenarios, but may include breathing exercises, romantic feelings, or non-sexual pleasurable sensations (I’m pretty sure thinking about chocolate for long enough would work for me). While it may seem like a lot of work to train your body to do this when more conventional means are equally effective, having the ability to call on orgasms mentally could be very useful to the many women who have difficulty coming during sex - sort of like high-powered fantasizing.

Of course, this is once again being framed as further evidence that while men are physical creatures sexually, women are primarily mental creatures. Which I personally think is a load of horseshit. No actual research has been done (that I can find anyway) to determine if men have this same ability, but if dream-orgasms are an indicator that waking mental orgasms are possible then the very commonness of wet dreams among men ought to imply that under the right conditions a man should be able to get off without physical stimulation while conscious as well. In fact, I imagine it’s pretty common, but instead of treating it as a cool type of male orgasm we just dismiss it as premature ejaculation. When men get so worked up they get off with little or no physical contact, it’s an accident. When women do it it’s mystical and wonderful. (To be fair, in the context of sex it is more frustrating when men do it, since men, unlike women, usually can’t keep going post-orgasm.) As with women, it’s probably something that some men can do easily while others can only achieve mental orgasms with deep concentration and lots of practice, and the fact that many men train themselves to withhold orgasms to prolong sex probably makes it more difficult for some men than it might be otherwise. Still, it’s worth adding to the repertoire of masturbation techniques if you find you are able to control your orgasms mentally. I’m sure just as many pajiboys as pajibettes would love to be able to get their rocks off while leaving both hands free to type (just…once again, keep it to yourself if you do, thanks). Unfortunately, don’t expect any research on male mental orgasms in the near future. Not only does there not seem to be a lot of interest, but because men’s orgasms are typically shorter in duration than women’s, they’re harder to study with techniques like MRI imaging.

The research on thinking yourself off indicates that sexual pleasure does have a large mental component on top of the physical one — for women at least, and I suspect for men as well, even if no one will acknowledge it. Mood is important; being able to fantasize both on your own and when with another person is important. Once again, knowing yourself and what you like is the best way to insure that you enjoy your sexuality to the fullest, so if you need to think about walking along a moonlit beach to get off during sex, don’t worry about it. Just do what you need to do and enjoy the results.

Dr. Pisaster has a doctorate in biophysics, not actually anything sexy. She does however enjoy having sex, reading about sex, and talking about sex. Especially when she’s had a little whiskey.









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Comments

I read the title and was sure we were going to have a Sally Draper discussion.

Posted by: PaddyDog at August 24, 2010 4:03 PM

I've had dreamgasms before, but never even tried doing it while awake.

Very instructive and interesting stuff Dr. P! I really enjoy your columns.

Posted by: banana at August 24, 2010 4:16 PM

Interesting. I don't think I'd be capable of achieving a mental orgasm...in my experience, I tend to delay them by thinking too much. I'm one of those women who really has to concentrate and focus to get off.

This all reminds me of that most excellent book by Mary Roach, Bonk.

Posted by: Julie at August 24, 2010 4:49 PM

A male friend once told me that a woman he knew told him that her boyfriend had whispered in her ear and she'd had an orgasm. My friend said, "What did he say?"

Somehow, I don't think it's what he said, but the moment, the atmosphere, the smells, the heat of him being near, her thoughts, etc. that got her off. The whole package.

Posted by: BWeaves at August 24, 2010 4:58 PM

The whole package.

Posted by: BWeaves at August 24, 2010 4:58 PM

So package was still involved?! *Phew*

Posted by: coryo at August 24, 2010 5:01 PM

the thoughts used to induce orgasms varied greatly between women. The researchers describe them as ranging from erotic to pastoral to abstract.

Oh yeah, pastoral, baby! Makes me hot, thinking about rolling hills, sheep, a grain silo . . . excuse me . . . .

Posted by: Lauren at August 24, 2010 5:18 PM

A grain silo in Clive Owens crotch.

Posted by: Bweaves at August 24, 2010 5:59 PM

Oh, Farmer Clive! Sow those oates! SOW EM GOOD!!

Posted by: Lauren at August 24, 2010 6:06 PM

sleep orgasm are awesome until you wake up and realize u orgasmed having dreamsex with a clown, an egyptian mummy or the most random and disgusting people you know. it's even worse than alcohol induced sex cause at least your mind didn't have any part on the latter.
my subconscious clearly hates me.
also lady gaga can kiss my ass. I couldn't stand when madonna pulled the self serviceable amazon routine guess how much I like it now from the wishy wash bubble dumbo.

Posted by: rio at August 24, 2010 6:17 PM

@rio: agreed. But once I dreamgasmed from a George Clooney dream. One of the highlights of my nighttime life!

Posted by: banana at August 24, 2010 6:32 PM

I had a male friend who tried and succeeded once while stoned on the weed.

Posted by: Brenton at August 24, 2010 6:36 PM

Good article - but, but - Do you guys see this?

You might also like:

I Joke About Sex Because it’s Funny When You’re Frightened – ominous Batman carrying an unconscious Robin

Won’t Somebody Think of the Men? – picture of Selena Gomez and a little girl rolling around on a bed

Female Orgasms Revealed to be an Evil Plot – Twilight morons staring virginally at each other

!!!! Am I crazy? You guys are doing this on purpose, aren’t you …?

Posted by: marya at August 24, 2010 7:12 PM

Ronnie Spector said in her autobiography that she could have an orgasm just listening to Phil Spector talk sexy to her over the phone.

Posted by: Pat C at August 24, 2010 7:28 PM

hippocampus (this one, oddly, is involved in long-term memory storage and spatial navigation - the fantasy component perhaps?)

Those buzzwords do not do the hippocampus justice and this, understandably, causes it to not make sense as a brain region that would "care" about orgasms. Memories aren't stored in brain like files on the computer. They are diffuse and abstract. No one really knows "where" memories are kept.
Basically the hippocampus binds together representations of objects and their context. Its does this when encoding the representation (forming the memory) and when retrieving (remembering the memory). Research also shows that during sleep the region is involved in linking related memories that have not occurred together in real-life.
(Qualifying statement: The hippocampus is not involved in all types of memories, mostly only declarative memories aka memories about facts, events that occured to us). Oh, snd its role in spatial navigation is to code where we currently are in a (virtual) space.

So then why would the hippocampus be related to the brain's response to orgasms? Without reading the studies, I'd guess it would be to the propensity of recalling past orgasmic events while undergoing stimulation.

Posted by: Drea at August 24, 2010 7:56 PM

I can do that. One of the most embarrassing things ever was the first time it happened--sitting in a college class that was pretty small.

The thing is, I had just been daydreaming about...stuff. I had a new boyfriend (who ended up being my husband) and he was, well, amazing. And I was reminiscing and maybe coming up with some new ideas and I felt sort of shuddery and didn't think much about it until it got more severe and then I realized OH MY GOD I'M HAVING ONE AND THE PROFESSOR IS LOOKING RIGHT AT ME. And it couldn't be a little normal one, either. It had to be a great big massive tidal wave of an O.

I just looked down at my spiral and waited. It was horrible. I prayed he had no idea what was going on. I was completely flushed and realized I was clenching my legs together like I had to go to the bathroom something fierce.

Once I realized I could do that, I employed it a few more times, but honestly it's not like a skill that comes in handy or anything. I mean, it's WAY better when hands are involved.

Posted by: Not my real name at August 24, 2010 8:57 PM

Dear Dr.P, you most delightfully erudite of the 'plain-talk' sex education writers I've seen around, tho it's not my habit to frequent sites that focus on the (non-porn, 'course) more literate aspects of this never-ending, complex mystery of human sensuality we can neither ignore or escape.

To accompany that most sincere complimentary nod, I simply will be as direct and 'no-nonsense' in what I felt the need to tell you:

Thank you for my prostate-induced orgasm.

Up until the very moment I started typing this now, it was understood, in my mind, that I would be using ANY 'handle' aside from the one that usually comments on here - this crowd simply could not know that the lovely and talented 'Bill (Formerly Bill)' would actually engage in the practice of anything even relating to a sexual nature.

Yet, as I'm writing, it seems so ridiculous to use any other name but my own, like people are going to remember this, or me, or give a rat's ass by the time they finish reading it.

In reading the 'female ejaculation' article a couple weeks back, I was feeling kind of validated, not to mention as smug and self-impressed as Simon Cowell getting yet another b.j. from Perez Hilton, because there were two women in my life, decades apart, that I'd had the incredible pleasure of inducing, and experiencing, that warm, wet, tasteless, odorless, colorless (in my experiences) squirting affirmation that you have indeed gotten dat gal OFF! (hey, I'm not writing anything you haven't already read)

But the last experience was over six years ago, so not much to brag about now, and not the point of my writing:

I'm a solid 50-and-one-half-years old. I finally got off my butt and got a new girlfriend after five years of near-celibacy. Now I still had no problem getting Mr. Winkles to snap to attention, and the little fighter can stay acceptably rigid for longer than I have a right to expect him to, okay? Nothing new there.

The problem (and it was getting to be a MAJOR problem) was being absolutely incapable of climaxing, ejaculating, blowing the wad, sealing the deal, leaving the deposit, what have you - and my girlfriend is just fantastic in bed, and really understanding of this recent condition (plus smart enough to know she's getting hers, 'talk to the hand' if you want your own); however, it was seriously getting to where I'd deliberately force myself to keep from just getting horny, because I remembered the last time we'd been together & how afterwards I just sat out on the back porch feeling so sorry for, and disgusted with, myself, breaking a knuckle from punching a wooden fence that I knew would break my fucking knuckles out of frustration, that it seemed inevitable that we'd be breaking up if I couldn't find some kind of help.

My doctor said viagra or cialis wouldn't be of any use for my condition. I was on an antidepressant and I'd tried cutting that in half, even stopping for 3-4 days in a row.

It was the day after my most recent physical that I read your column about prostate stimulation. I linked it to my girlfriend, knowing only that she'd be blushing until the glare from her cheeks would blind her, and, really, nothing else. I had nothing to lose by this time.

It was a very, VERY graphic column, Dr.P, and I admired you so much for being so candid and 'doing the dirty work' that the majority in your profession wouldn't dare approach.

But, even as wonderfully well-written and comprehensive as your column was, the Pajiba commenters' contributions were what gave me the courage to forward it - if all of these excellent commenters could respond and contribute in a course that went from intelligent, to maybe a bit shocking but still intelligent, to as humanly rewarding (and intelligent) that anyone could hope mature readers would respond to, I linked her to this really not having any idea how she would react to it.

I believe we're a bit older than the majority of your particular demographic (she's 53), so that alone makes it a fucking shame that I'm only now learning some of this stuff with you guys. She has no interest whatsoever in reading about movies or entertainment stuff, so of course I never bothered talking about this site with her.

Long story short: this past Saturday I went over for the usual take-out and a movie. While we're making out, she starts giving me oral sex-
boyohboyohboy she never does that! She's going so beautifully but of course I have to sling-shot her to the bedroom, losing all garments in mid-air (I think this is why she rarely gives me oral sex, she never gets halfway through) and she's still working on that oral project in bed, while she pulls out a 'toy' - a toy for me (quite obvious I'm getting worked up as I write this, eh?)

Soon as she finished reading what I'd sent her, she went to one of the, oh, 276 adult stores within a half-mile radius and bought a genuine, weirdly-curved, adjustable vibrating Prostate Stimulator/Scrotum Massager- NOT a dildo, my friends - a sex toy designed specifically for a MAN nevermindthatitinvolvestheanalcavity AND, with her gentle, loving ways best kept to myself, used that sucker to give me one of the most intense orgasms of my life. EXclamation Point!

While I'm still trying to lower my blood pressure, taking concentrated breaths to try & slow my pounding heart down, she's got her arms around my neck and her lips at my ear whispering, "Now you know why it gets me off when we do it." ("do it," btw, are the two sexiest two-letter words ever put together when they're coming from her - she should have a patent)

Guys my age usually don't share stuff like this with real people, unlike you computer-generated, giggly megabited 'Avatars' that write and discuss these subjects nowadays.

Dr.P, please forgive my sharing much more than any person who's still digesting their dinner should have to endure reading, but your column, right at that crucial time, kept me from stupidly breaking up with a woman who loves me enough to be insulted to think I'd leave a relationship for a "minor" problem about sex. She would have forbid me from leaving her either way, bless her tender little heart- but your column, and the 'real people' who didn't take the subject as a platform for juvenile humor (notice I said "juvenile" humor, not Pajiba's wicked one-liners and gut-busting comments) literally enriched and enhanced my and my NOW-FIANCE'S intimate relationship to an entirely different level.

and roll credits...

I like joking around here and offering an opinion when I think it might not intrude, & may be too embarrassed to use this handle again, but what is the proper online etiquette to express the gratitude for how an otherwise 'interesting' or 'thought-provoking' subject to most became an absolute life-changer for me?

I most sincerely thank you, Dr.P - I feel like I've covered my bases now..

however, might I suggest that posting an impossible-not-to-ignore, arousing article on a subject such as female orgasms (or 'females'. Or 'orgasms'. Or 'sex' for that matter) at four o'clock on a dreary Tuesday afternoon doesn't exactly inspire people to jump on it, know what I mean? When I started this I only saw 9 comments, maybe it's picked up since.

Not trying to be presumptuous, but from what I've seen, an early-morning posting seems to get the commenters not only time to respond before actually having to work, but kind of gets the juices flowing and helps wake one up a bit.

Thanks again, all!

Posted by: Bill (Formerly Bill) at August 24, 2010 9:23 PM

I think your comment, Bill (Formerly Bill), was nearly as long as the original post.

That sir...is impressive.

Actually I totally nerded out and decided to do a word count. You actually beat the length of the original post. Congratulations!

Posted by: DeistBrawler at August 24, 2010 11:29 PM

Honest to God, I don't know why you women ever leave the house.

*drops pants, crosses arms, stares at penis*

*thinks horny thoughts*

*13 hours later*

Come ONNNNN, dammit.

Posted by: bucdaddy at August 25, 2010 1:22 AM

Bill (Formerly Bill)'s story was kind of inspiring. Thanks for sharing that.

And thanks as always, Dr., for what is becoming an anticipated regular read on Thursdays.

Posted by: DarthCorleone at August 25, 2010 2:34 AM

Tuesdays, rather. :- )

Posted by: DarthCorleone at August 25, 2010 2:35 AM

*Thnking face*

HOLYMARYMOTHEROFGOD!

Was that as good for you as it was for me?

Posted by: Camilla at August 25, 2010 3:09 AM

That was lovely Bill
Don't you dare be embarrased, or let the snarkers get you down with weak pot shots about the word count. Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit.

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at August 25, 2010 3:45 AM

Mr. Bill, it would be a shame if you were embarrassed by that post, especially enough to stop posting under that nome de plume.
This coming from someone who has made a drunken depressive fool of himself on this site, under this name, more times than I wish I didn't remember.

Posted by: Rykker at August 25, 2010 3:49 AM

Honest to God, I don't know why you women ever leave the house.

How do you think we got in charge in the first place? They weren't paying attention!

...At least until a few jackasses went and ruined it by shutting the self-sexcapades down. Then they had ALLLLL the time in the world to see our fuckups.

Posted by: Vermillion at August 25, 2010 7:43 AM

Bill (just Bill)

Bravo!

Posted by: , at August 25, 2010 9:50 AM

Bill (Not Bill), Congrats!!!! and I'm glad you wrote about it.

Posted by: Drake at August 25, 2010 12:20 PM

How do you think we got in charge in the first place?

You're not.

Posted by: zygomatique at August 25, 2010 2:56 PM

Oh no, Lindsey with an 'e', that wasn't sarcasm...I was being totally honest.

I was impressed that his comment was actually longer than the original post.

Posted by: DeistBrawler at August 25, 2010 3:40 PM

Size isn't important, DB. It is skill that matters.

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at August 25, 2010 3:51 PM

Women The first line of defence against mind reading Aliens and Orgasms!

Posted by: peanut at August 25, 2010 3:57 PM

You fucking guys, he said, smiling:

I just now got the "aw, what-the-hell" courage to see how many *snicker* comments I might get.

Lindsey, your comment was beautiful and much appreciated, as were Darth's, Camilla's, Rykker's, Che's, Comma's, Drake's, and the overall relief you people provided. Maybe I can comment on a movie review again some day, when the 'prostate' comment has subsided.

but DeistBrawler's comment was a 'guy' thing, wherein a fellow guy throws in an aside comment after the first guy has opened himself up for ridicule, as to both distract immediate thought from the guy's awkward yet sincere admission of his guy problem, while at the same time showing 'awkward guy' that it's basically cool and nothing to worry about.

Thanks for the 'guy' support, DB. I do write some long shit, though, don't I??

Posted by: Bill (Formerly Bill) at August 25, 2010 10:22 PM

B(FB),

I'm in your age bracket, buddy, and I'm not afraid to inform people here that you can still enjoy everything in life (nudge-nudge) with half the nads of most men, so check your sack, Jack, and keep spilling your guts. 'Jibs are like family, they're loud and crude and nasty to each other but damn if they don't rally around you when you own up to a tough situation.

I love these guys.

Posted by: , at August 26, 2010 1:11 AM