Pajiba

Gryllis is a douchebag, I know he makes you ladies moist and that's okay, but he represents everything we as "Pajibans" are supposed to loathe: "fluff over substance."

If homeboy wants to show off his underwear, I recommend a nice calendar shoot or a nice soft-core Cinemax flick, leave the educational survival shows to the true expert: Survivorman.

Bill Smith is my new personal hero.

And how come I'm not surprised that whatsherface would mention Will "welcon' no' eart'" Smith's new masturbatory money waster and not Charlton Heston's Omega Man.

Bear Gryllis is so not hardcore. It's all about Ray Mears, now that is a real man.

I want to know which bodyguard pulled the short straw and had to run the fucking marathon with Katie, coz you know they weren't letting her out there alone.

I really, really, really want an article posted regarding how Oprah called the abuse allegations at the school she founded among the most devastating things that's ever happened TO HER. She is officially the most narcissistic asshole ever.

Ok, I read the "Best Cinematic Dystopias" list and... am I the only person ever who thought the movie of "A Clockwork Orange" was deeply flawed? The set design was fantastic, but casting someone who's pushing 30 as a 15 year old sociopath, in my opinion, took away any kind of empathy the character garnered. At least in the book Alex was young enough that you felt something for him, in the movie he's just a psychotic asshole with virtually no hope of redemption. Alright, enough of that.

Bear Grylls, I have a hard time with that one because he actually does some impressive things (eating raw eggs, jumping into freezing water, anything involving his own urine) so I can't really blame him for not actually risking his life for the Discovery Channel. But I understand the frustration.

Bear Grylls is hot and I used to like Man vs. Wild, but now I just fast forward to the inevitable unnecessary leap into icy-waters/quagmire/rotting carcass scene, and the obligitory (of course!) naked pushups that follow. Then I change the channel and find Tony Bourdain or Les Stroud.

Is there ANYONE who at the moment is as cool as Anthony Bourdain?

I don't think so.

I love Survivorman as well. He's awesome.

Mike Rowe is pretty fucking cool as well, come to think of it. AND hot.

Quite right Alex the Odd. If I'm stranded in the middle of nowhere with just one companion - damn right I'm going to choose Ray Mears.

He might not act all macho, or have a poncy name, but you know full well that there isn't an environment on the planet that could beat him.

while I appreciate anyone who shows so much devotion to animals, I have to vent my frustration with Bill Smith's Main Line Animal Rescue. When searching for a dog two years ago, I contacted Main Line animal rescue about one of their dogs on petfinder. They informed me (a city resident) that they ONLY house their animals with residents of the Main Line. (the Main Line being a VERY wealthy area just outside the city of Philadelphia). Since I did not live on the Main Line, I was not allowed to adopt from them. I was angered and frankly hurt that my honest desire to adopt a shelter dog was being thwarted by such an elitist rule. I wonder why they would put geographical restrctions on pet ownership?

Had to tell someone.

I wonder if Malibu is Steve-O's father?

I am ashamed to admit my curiosity because it reveals the fact that I have watched Jackass more than I would care to admit.

I agree that Bear Grylls isn't the the most hardcore survival expert out there (I personally enjoy the new disclaimers they air at the beginning), but the guy did climb Everest (I believe he was the youngest to survive the climb?) after breaking his back parachuting in Africa. I've, uh, gone camping in a tent.

And I'm a sucker for a Welsh accent. He's like an enthusiastic Christian Bale right on my cable.

What was startling to me was how MANY of these are among my favorite films. I kept scolling thinking, okay, Casino Royale HAS to be on this list, AHOY! (by the way, D.C. is MINE. Don't listen to him Daniel, it's gay. Way gay. Trust me on this one. However, the woman standing over here? Hetero baby), and then it was, "Where in the fuck is Thin Man?" Yes! ::Punches fist in air::. In addition to teh funny, this is beautifully written. Applause all around. And pass that bottle of Robert Mondavi 76 cab reserve, will you?

"And how come I'm not surprised that whatsherface would mention Will "welcon' no' eart'" Smith's new masturbatory money waster and not Charlton Heston's Omega Man."

Not to mention "The Last Man on Earth" with Vincent Price, which I'm pretty sure "I Am Legend" is at least loosely based on.

Uh..hey Barbado-- I'm as cool as Anthony Bourdain. I just can't cook as well. And I haven't written any books and I haven't traveled the world. But I can be a complete asshole (but a likable asshole) when I want to be, just like him.

Malibu cracked me up. Where is he today? That's what I'd like to know. I'm guessing he's had a sex change. At least he wouldn't have to change his name.

And all of those shows are bullshit. In any of those "nature" shows, it's always the cameraman who has it worse than the person they're filming. Especially when their mountain climbing because they are doing what everyone else is doing but with 50lbs of equipment.

Theresa, MLAR doesn't "only" allow their animals to go to residents of the Main Line. In fact, the facility itself isn't even on the Main Line. However, they do require that the adopters live locally, in order to do home and fence checks before adopting. I don't know the particular circumstances in your situation, but I do know that the city is an hour+ from the farm where they operate, so those logistics alone may have prevented them from adopting to you. I also know that they have very stringent guidelines for adopters in order to assure that their animals are going to homes where they will be cared for as a member of the family, for the rest of their lives. There may have been other factors (such as a lack of a fenced-in yard, etc) combined with the distance to make them decide that you weren't a good fit.

Beth,
Thanks for the clarification. I must have got a very bitchy, uniformed volunteer on the phone or something, because that is exactly what she told me "we don't place animals outside the Main Line." Knowing that that policy isn't actually the case makes me feel a lot better.