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In Just 7 Days I Can Make You a Man

By Drew Morton | Posted Under Overappreciated Gems | Comments (53)



karatekidbu21.jpg

Director John G. Avildsen’s The Karate Kid (1984), like The Goonies (1985), was one of those movies that was released around the time of my childhood that I never ended up seeing. Growing up, I was drawn to Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure (1985), Back to the Future (1985), Spaceballs (1987), Who Framed Roger Rabbit (1988), and Mac & Me (1988). The earliest I can recall hearing anything about The Karate Kid was roughly ten years after it came out. I had just gotten into one of my first fights and I had the coordination of bull in a china shop. My father suggested I take up karate, which he had at one time practiced, and my parents tried to track down a VHS copy of the film to inspire me in between punching bag sessions. Well, it turns out the library (or perhaps the local video store) was out of stock that week and shortly thereafter my interest in self-defense was trumped by film, television, and video games. I completed my childhood, my young adulthood, and made it into my mid-20s (is that still young adulthood?) before this became an issue worthy of an intervention. My best friend, Neal Long, threatened to demote me from “best man” status in his wedding if I did not watch the film, which had been sitting on my shelf after he sent me a the DVD box set as a gift.

I begin my review of The Karate Kid with a personal anecdote because I feel like whenever we revisit those films that defined our youth, we are blinded by nostalgia when it comes to their true quality. Sure, some of them are pretty damn good movies (Pee-Wee, Back to the Future, and Who Framed Roger Rabbit still stand up for me) while others are not nearly as good as our fond memories would lead us to believe (Mac & Me). That haze of love and nostalgia never existed towards The Karate Kid for myself, unlike many of you. Was I robbed of something in my childhood? Perhaps, but even when you’re in kindergarten, you can’t see every movie that is released during the short-span of your life.

The set-up for the film is rather standard fish out of water story: Daniel LaRusso (Ralph Macchio) and his mother (Randee Heller) are forced to move from Newark, New Jersey to Southern California. Despite the palm trees, warm weather, and lush beaches, Daniel has a hard time adjusting to his new high school. Essentially, his attraction to Ali Mills (Elisabeth Shue), a beautiful cheerleader, ignites the ire of her karate-literate ex-boyfriend Johnny (William Zabka). Soon, Daniel finds himself the bullied target of Johnny and his brothers at the Cobra Kai dojo. The sensei at the dojo, an ex-Special Forces Vietnam vet (Martin Kove), instructs his students to throw battlefield compassion to the wind. As he notes, “We do not train to be merciful here. Mercy is for the weak. Here, in the streets, in competition: A man confronts you, he is the enemy. An enemy deserves no mercy.”

Given the lessons of the sensei, it is of no surprise that the attacks on Daniel grow especially mean-spirited. In one sequence, he is forced down a steep hill on his bicycle, slicing his forehead open in the process. During one especially brutal attack, where Daniel faces six to one odds, he is rescued by Mr. Miyagi (Pat Morita), the handyman at his apartment. Initially, Miyagi intends to visit the Cobra Kai sensei and to appeal to him via the philosophy that karate is a defensive tool. When the sensei shrugs off Miyagi’s request, Miyagi states that Daniel will challenge Cobra Kai’s best in the upcoming “All Valley Karate Tournament.” The sensei agrees and Miyagi and Daniel begin their training. Wax on, wax off.

By the time Daniel reached the training phrase of The Karate Kid, I started to worry about the direction the film was going in. First off, the population of the San Fernando Valley seemed to have the largest settlement of dickheads and douchebags outside of Tool Academy. Not only are the kids especially brutal in their bullying of Daniel (and this is coming from the perspective of a man who was also bullied as a kid), but I was shocked when the adults joined in. Daniel is blamed by his teachers for the increase in fighting, Ali is forbidden to see him due to what appears to be a rift in social class, and he is mocked by a country club full of people when he not only finds Johnny kissing Ali but a plateful of spaghetti across his chest. With the exceptions of Daniel, his mother, Miyagi, and Ali, the “So.” in So. Cal stands for sociopath. Essentially, it felt like Avildsen and screenwriter Robert Kamen had unnaturally stacked the deck against Daniel in order to elicit further solicit our sympathies. Well, like Precious (2009) and many Lars von Trier films, it just isn’t necessary. We’re already on Daniel’s side, so quit wasting time by spinning the wheels against him.

Secondly, I felt uncomfortable with the character of Mr. Miyagi. Pat Morita really plays the hell out of the role and was worthy of the Academy Award nomination he was given, but essentially the character is the Asian equivalent to the “magical negro.” He exists to help the white guy get out of trouble by teaching him how to become a man. Admittedly, I’m short changing the film a bit: Miyagi’s character is sketched out at times (such as his relationship with his wife, which raises the ghosts of the Manzanar internment camp) and he seems to enjoy his role as Daniel’s surrogate father. However, I found a lot of potential in his character that was sadly given few moments to shine beyond the stereotype. I think if Avildsen would have devoted less screen time to the assholes of Reseda and more on Miyagi, The Karate Kid could have been something really great.

This leads me to my final criticism of the film: the structure is incredibly lopsided. At 126 minutes, The Karate Kid has a lot of breathing room. Despite this, however, we feel surprisingly unfulfilled at the end of the film. The first hour and a half consists almost entirely of Daniel getting bullied and performing home maintenance for Miyagi. That’s a lot of screen time devoted to two rather obvious plot points: Daniel needs to learn to defend himself and Miyagi is going to teach him how. There’s a problem with the film when we don’t actually see Daniel practice karate until the climax of the movie, which is choreographed and shot really well but leaves us at an odd point. Essentially, Daniel reigns supreme at the tournament and just as we’re taking a celebratory breath and enjoying the beginning of emotional closure, Avildsen fades up the credits. You chose to abridge a major plot moment now? Why not cut ten minutes of Daniel getting trampled or painting a fence instead? It’s all foreplay with little, climactic sustain. Essentially, the film gives us seven days of Miyagi making Daniel a man (to quote the Rocky Horror Picture Show number) and seven seconds of actual manhood. Nostalgia probably makes it seem like an eternity.

Drew Morton is a Ph.D. student in Cinema and Media Studies at the University of California-Los Angeles. His criticism and articles have previously appeared in the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, the UWM Post, Flow, Mediascape, The Playlist, and Senses of Cinema. He is the 2008 and 2010 recipient of the Otis Ferguson Award for Critical Writing in Film Studies.









Pajiba Love 19/08/10 | At Some Point We Must Ask Ourselves, "Is It Me?" | The Aniston Problem













Comments

And seven nights!

Posted by: fenchurch at August 19, 2010 1:09 PM

I support Inter/racial relationships! I believe love has no color!
{—–W W W. M i x e d M a t c h i n g -C0 M——}
This club is for those of us that don't discriminate! This is to all my people who don't care about somebody's ethnic background, just how they are on the inside.
If you want to find a sincere Inter/racial relationship. If you are serious. Come and join us!

Posted by: lucus at August 19, 2010 1:10 PM

Yeah, but it beats the living HELL out of The Last Dragon.

Posted by: Kahntahmp at August 19, 2010 1:13 PM

It's really interesting to read a review written by someone who didn't see the film as they were growing up. I fully agree with your assessment of the movie but, being one of those who watched constantly, I still love it despite its flaws.

Jacket on, jacket off...wait.

Posted by: admin at August 19, 2010 1:15 PM

Who the hell needed to waste precious bullying and fence-painting time when you could just compress the training into a nifty montage, 80's style.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at August 19, 2010 1:18 PM

"We're gonna need a montage...."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SPFCHuEegsk

Posted by: Drew Morton at August 19, 2010 1:21 PM

You're dead to me, Kahntahmp. DEAD. Sho Nuff and Bruce Leroy could have dick-slapped everyone in this movie without breaking a sweat.

Posted by: Tracer Bullet at August 19, 2010 1:22 PM

I haven't seen it in quite some time, for what it's worth.

It's the journey that counts, and all that. There's something almost hypnotic (figuratively) about the constant training. It's almost the antithesis of the typical Jean Claude Van Damme movie (while following the same structure), in which the training happens quickly and usually in montage. Daniel paints that fence, washes that car, and sands that deck, etc... and we feel how much work he puts into it.

Like Mr. Miyagi says, tournaments don't mean anything, and belts are for holding up your pants. Winning the tournament and becoming a man and getting the girl are almost afterthoughts (though they require the attention they get because of the standard story structure).

Also, I grew up on this and it was awesome.

Posted by: Brenton at August 19, 2010 1:24 PM

BSlim, we're on the same page. I think Drew may have the attention span of a squirrel.

Posted by: Brenton at August 19, 2010 1:26 PM

well, I mean, it is the Valley. ;)

Posted by: lizzieborden at August 19, 2010 1:39 PM

You constantly mix up the names Johnny and Daniel in this article.

"Soon, Johnny finds himself the bullied target of Johnny and his brothers at the Cobra Kai dojo."

"With the exceptions of Johnny, his mother, Miyagi, and Ali, the “So.” in So. Cal stands for sociopath."

"Why not cut ten minutes of Johnny getting trampled or painting a fence instead?"

Posted by: superking at August 19, 2010 1:43 PM

Bite your tongue Kahntahmp!!! Much as I loved Mr. Miyagi, he never possessed the power of the glow!!!

Posted by: Adora Belle at August 19, 2010 1:43 PM

Superking,

Thanks for that. I don't know how I mixed those up. I don't think I've ever done that before... Fixing now!

Posted by: Drew Morton at August 19, 2010 1:45 PM

Did you write this review drunk?
"Soon, Johnny finds himself the bullied target of Johnny and his brothers at the Cobra Kai dojo"

maybe you didn't realize it was DANIEL being bullied?

"During one especially brutal attack, where Johnny faces six to one odds, he is rescued by Mr. Miyagi (Pat Morita), the handyman at his apartment"

"With the exceptions of Johnny, his mother, Miyagi, and Ali, the “So.” in So. Cal stands for sociopath." (I'm pretty sure Johnny WAS a sociopath, up until the end.)

Posted by: Nico at August 19, 2010 1:49 PM

Not drunk, just kept thinking about Daniel=the kid from The Outsiders. For some reason, those bland, Apple Pie names just kept getting jumbled up in my de-caffeinated noggin. If there would have been a Mike, Chuck, and Zack in addition to Johnny and Daniel, I would have been screwed and the review would have read like an ad-lib.

Posted by: Drew Morton at August 19, 2010 1:53 PM

"He who walks in another's tracks leaves no footprints."

Words of wisdom on the merits of individual accomplishements, or ninja stealth tactic?

Choose carfully (ninjas are everywhere).

Posted by: superasente at August 19, 2010 1:53 PM

Kahntahmp, for you to think that The Last Dragon could possibly be inferior to The Karate Kid must mean that you have a bright and shining intellect, which is fed by exploring the impact of martial arts on party cinema as contrasted by motivational teen dramas. Your wise appreciation of film is admiriable, and I feel that your mind is the playground of the Gods.

HAHAHA, no I'm just kidding. You're a dummy.

Posted by: superasente at August 19, 2010 2:00 PM

I watched this again for the first time in like 20 years just the other day and I lost my shit laughing at this line:

“Young bee need flower to make honey, not old prune!”

I still think it’s a pretty decent film. When Daniel gets kicked in the leg and has to bow out - I actually teared up a bit. And Billy Zabka - nailedit! Johnny is every asshole/douchebag/jock/bully you knew in high school in one smug, blond-colored package.

But the music? Wow. It was like swimming in a pool of Yucateco* sauce after rubbing your eardrums with cheese graters.

* The best habañero sauce - the best Jerry!!

Posted by: hM at August 19, 2010 2:05 PM

Bill Simmons is gonna be piiiiiiiiiiiissssed.

Posted by: Kballs at August 19, 2010 2:05 PM

Brenton is my hero.

I will always love this movie. There are so many little moments that stand out, like when the guy sweep's Daniel's leg and then immediately gets down and apologizes, because, even though he was an asshole, he knew that was going too far but couldn't go against his sensei. Or Daniel knocking over the brick in front of Ali's house and her parents getting all embarassed about it; and then right after that Daniel's mom's car won't start and Daniel is totally mortified.

Posted by: Todd at August 19, 2010 2:11 PM

I wont judge you for this review Drew, but God will.

Oh, and for the record, The Last Dragon RAWKED. Karate Kid is still a better movie.

Posted by: Neal at August 19, 2010 2:13 PM

This review of a nostalgic movie was handled much better than Dustin's shitsmearing campaign against "The Warriors." That was just evil.

And Drew, you didn't say much about some of the best parts of the movie:

- The beautiful lines delivered during the Karate Championships ("Sweep the knee. Do you have a problem with that?" "I don't want him beaten. I want him out of commission." and "Put him in a body bag, YEEEEAAAHHHH!!!!").

- The tour de force performance submitted by Martin Kove.

- The continued evolution of Billy Zabka's 56-game-hitting-streak-esque portrayal of enormous douchebags in the 1980s.

Posted by: Kballs at August 19, 2010 2:21 PM

Did you write this review drunk?
"Soon, Johnny finds himself the bullied target of Johnny and his brothers at the Cobra Kai dojo"

Wanna know how to tell when you're drunk when READING the review?
I didn't even notice the mistakes until they were pointed-out, which was after I read the review...

Ice 101, folks. It's cheaper and more potent than Rumpleminze.

And Iiiiiiii'm jus'h sayin'....

Posted by: Rykker at August 19, 2010 2:22 PM

C'mon, Kballs...

The line is "Sweep the leg. You gotta problem with that?"

Posted by: pomeroy at August 19, 2010 2:28 PM

When Pat Morita died I was curious about his other work; as a child of the 80's I remembered him mostly from the Karate Kid movies, a toothpaste commercial (forget what brand), and Happy Days. When I searched the internet it turned out he had embraced the "wise Asian" role of the Karate Kid and because the film was such a security blankets for those of us in the 80's, he didn't look back on it with disdain. Which is more than I can say for what Morgan Freeman said of his time on the Electric Company. Morita also started off as a comedy act, calling himself "The Hip Nip". I feel like he had a sense of humor about a lot of his roles, even though I would have wanted to see him in more challenging things as I got older.

P.S. Just to make you all uncomfortable, this film came out when I hit puberty, so Daniel LaRusso was the first guy I touched myself to.

You're welcome.

Posted by: scorzi at August 19, 2010 2:37 PM

Aw, Scorzi, you're the best around.

Posted by: admin at August 19, 2010 2:43 PM

What?! Morgan Freeman took a dump on "The Electric Company"?

Foul!

Although, I must admit, the only reason I watched that show was for the Spider-Man animated series they far-too-infrequently ran.
I was quite oft disappointed, as I remember.

Posted by: Rykker at August 19, 2010 2:52 PM

(High fives Admin)


For Rykker:

"It was my idea to just do The Electric Company" (1971) for a couple of years and go on. But, you get trapped by that money thing. It`s golden handcuffs. It gets a lot of people, including soap opera actors and commercial actors. I was there three years too long".

Posted by: scorzi at August 19, 2010 3:00 PM

It's not like he's talkin' shit about the Electric Company he's just being honest about what he should have done for himself, his career.


HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY YOU GUYS!

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at August 19, 2010 3:09 PM

There's a surprisingly thoughtful article on Cracked called " How the Karate Kid Ruined the Modern World"

http://www.cracked.com/article_18544_how-the-karate-kid-ruined-modern-world.html

It's always been a huge problem for me that Daniel trained for about six months, and would get crushed by any of the Cobra Kais. Of course the All-Valley Karate Tournament is the nation's only full-contact Karate tournament (With no pads!) for children so perhaps I'm thinking about this too much.

As for the ending, I believe the first scene of the Karate Kid II which takes place in the parking lot immediately after the tournament was filmed to be in the first film. That would at least add a little more closure.

Posted by: Mrcreosote at August 19, 2010 3:11 PM

I have to agree with a lot of the comments above. There are so many little, precise moments in this movie that they add up to so much. The training, training, training is perfect, too. It's a very Zen way of learning karate, and even as a kid I was transfixed by that. Though, I also loved practicing the crane kick, so much that I'd do it all the time in my backyard.

Is it Back to the Future? No, but Karate Kid is a minor national treasure.

Speaking of part two, I watched both recently, and I was shocked that the opening scene of two wasn't the last scene of part one. I definitely agree that cutting the end right then was a little too much. Or, too little. Also, part two is just as good, if not better, than part one. You want more Mr. Miyagi? See part two. Now.

Posted by: RobP at August 19, 2010 3:58 PM

Ok, scorzi and 'Slim...

I get what he was sayin' (not knowing what he actually said before I made my ignorant outburst).

Peace.

Posted by: Rykker at August 19, 2010 4:09 PM

How could a child of the 80s grow up to adulthood without seeing the classic gem The Karate Kid? Did you not have the the HBO/Skinemax combo at your beck and call? It's like saying you never got around to seeing The Last Starfighter until you were 30. I don't get it.

Continuing the review...

Posted by: Candy at August 19, 2010 4:23 PM

Nostalgia shmostalgia.

This column is utter blasphemy. Over-the-top or not, this is one of the most fun and quotable movies ever, and Morita gives it real dramatic weight at the appropriate times.

I agree with RobP that Daniel's "manhood" is covered somewhat in Karate Kid 2. It's not as good as the original, but it has a few great moments in it, including one touching and understated scene in which Daniel comforts Miyagi after the death of his father.

Mrcreosote >> Six months? Try six weeks. Miyagi starts training Daniel after the Halloween party. The tournament is on December 19th. Maybe that was a typo; six months would be somewhat believable.

Best line that some of my good friends made into a sign as support for me at a sporting event many years ago (directed toward the opposition obviously): "Points or no points, you're dead meat!"

I'll end on this note. If you're a fan of The Karate Kid and you have not seen the music video "Sweep The Leg" yet, go immediately!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uFlQNtL8F9s

Posted by: DarthCorleone at August 19, 2010 4:24 PM

After reading this review, I'm glad I first encountered this movie with wide-eyed wonder and a whole lot less cynicism. The end of the movie was and remains to be a fulfilling feel good moment in my point of view. As a matter of fact the entire movie still hold weight even after seeing the new version.

Posted by: Candy at August 19, 2010 4:31 PM

According to DarthCorleone's link, The Karate Kid is also the fountain of youth. Has anybody that was in that movie even aged?

Posted by: admin at August 19, 2010 4:53 PM

GREAT!!!!!! Interview with Pat Morita about his career in 2000. It's extremely long, but he talks about the Karate Kid in this clip starting at 12:08:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qH_PrWRS8Y4&feature=channel

Posted by: scorzi at August 19, 2010 5:00 PM

"I think if Avildsen would have devoted less screen time to the assholes of Reseda and more on Miyagi, The Karate Kid could have been something really great."

Huh. What a great insight.

Posted by: Rob at August 19, 2010 6:12 PM

Kahntahmp, for you to think that The Last Dragon could possibly be inferior to The Karate Kid must mean that you have a bright and shining intellect, which is fed by exploring the impact of martial arts on party cinema as contrasted by motivational teen dramas. Your wise appreciation of film is admiriable, and I feel that your mind is the playground of the Gods.
HAHAHA, no I'm just kidding. You're a dummy.
Posted by: superasente at August 19, 2010 2:00 PM

Inferior would imply good in the first place, but let's clairify:
The ONLY thing that gives The Karate Kid any edge over The Last Dragon is Noriyuki "Pat" Morita actually having had an acting career as compared to anyone in The Karate Kid OR The Last Dragon. Sure, they've all acted since then, but do we care?
________________________________________________________________
You're dead to me, Kahntahmp. DEAD. Sho Nuff and Bruce Leroy could have dick-slapped everyone in this movie without breaking a sweat.
Posted by: Tracer Bullet at August 19, 2010 1:22 PM

And Miyagi would have mocked his ass, healed whiney, and mocked him more.
________________________________________________________________
Bite your tongue Kahntahmp!!! Much as I loved Mr. Miyagi, he never possessed the power of the glow!!!
Posted by: Adora Belle at August 19, 2010 1:43 PM

Soul Glo Karate is no Karate. It's Sparkly Vampirism in disguise.

Posted by: Kahntahmp at August 19, 2010 6:14 PM

In case anyoine else is still reading this article this late at night, one of the last things Pat Morita did before he passed away was voice an episode of Spongebob Squarepants called "Karate Island". I don't know if it's available online anywhere, but I would recommend looking it up. It's one of my favorite episodes.

Also, I currently own this movie. I bought it about a year ago for $5 in the discount bin at Wal Mart. I LOVE this movie and thinks it olds up surprisingly well. So you can just go suck it, Drew.

Posted by: elsie at August 19, 2010 8:49 PM

those bland, Apple Pie names

Mmm kay. Lamest excuse ever!

Posted by: Patty at August 19, 2010 9:02 PM

elsie >> Late at night? It's only 6:05 p.m. here. I always seem to gear up for Pajiba comment traffic just when it's winding down.

Posted by: DarthCorleone at August 19, 2010 9:08 PM

@elsie

Is that the one where SpongeBob goes to some sort of Enter the Dragon style tournament? If it is, Sandy haters should be aware that it IS a Sandy episode.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at August 19, 2010 9:14 PM

@comma: Yes, that would be the one. I was not aware that there were Sandy haters.

Posted by: elsie at August 19, 2010 10:08 PM

I'm a great fan of this movie at the time of my childhood! A really action packed movie!

Posted by: Trag Lee at August 19, 2010 10:12 PM

@bslim: Dude, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to call you "comma". Sorry 'bout that. No excuses.

Posted by: elsie at August 19, 2010 10:13 PM

@elsie

Oh there indeed are Sandy haters, rabid Sandy haters. Personally, I love her, or at least used to, before Stephen Hillenburg left and the show took a nosedive.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at August 19, 2010 10:33 PM

Kahntahmp, you keep talking like that, and shits gonna get real... and I'm damn sure you wouldn't be stopping the bullets in yo teeth!

...as far as Karate Kid goes, I too never saw it as a kid. I watched it about 3 years ago during Hungover Theatre. But I still liked it; I thought it was one of the best "You've never seen 80s-MOVIE-XYZ?!?" that I've watched.

Now Top Gun and Goonies? Those can suck my left nut - they were both horrible... except for the ridiculously cheesy but funny Take My Breath Away scene in the former. I laughed through that!

Posted by: Gnaius at August 20, 2010 12:38 AM

Man, I could really use a Magical Negro right about now.

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at August 20, 2010 12:39 AM

Remember 'e', the Magical Negro is "one of the good ones." So, no miscegenation for you!

Posted by: RobP at August 20, 2010 11:58 AM

Hate to break it to you RobP, but that ship has SAILED.
It is TRUE, what they say you know....

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at August 21, 2010 1:52 AM

And why do you ASSUME I am WHITE?
Racist MoFo.
{Kidding}

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at August 21, 2010 1:53 AM

You know what, as soon as I posted that comment I thought to myself, "I think that was a little racist of me." I chalk it up to only knowing white Lindseys, even the dude ones.

Posted by: RobP at August 21, 2010 2:27 AM














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