Pajiba

"Those same people would also say that I'm being pretentious by trying to discuss the true meaning of "pretentious." Not true: I'm being a pedantic asshole. Though, I do suppose I could rightfully be accused of being pretentious if you feel I'm only creating the appearance of pedantry, when in fact I'm just being an asshole. It's a vicious circle, folks."

*starts slow clap*

I was never much interested in this film, in spite of the talent attached; but I thank you from the bottom of my pedantic heart for trying to correct the growing misuse of the word pretentious.

For your next project, could you do something about all these idiots who are totally misusing the word ballad? My urge to kill is rising.

Wait, wait. WAIT! WAIT A MINUTE!

David Strathairn, Natalie Portman, Jude Law, RACHEL WEISZ? And adorable, soulful little Norah Jones?

And you're saying it's not good?

Well fuck that. I do believe I will have to see for myself.

but he goes overboard here with the unnecessary slow-motion close-ups and sets that look like Edward Hopper paintings rendered with a Lite-Brite.

Love it.

I'm usually interested in what Wong Kar-wai does, primarily due to the gorgeous and affecting In the Mood for Love, but this doesn't quite present itself as a movie I'd want to see. Great review though.

It's David Strathairn. Now who's pretentious, eh? :-)

Good cast--too bad the movie didn't turn out better. This sounds like a rental, where I can gripe about its emotional manipulation in private.

I think Rachel Weisz needs to stay away from the indie endeavors, anyone else waste 2 hours of their life on The Fountain?

Julie In The Mood For Love is uh-mah-zing. I've already told you all about my undying love for Tony Leung. It started there.

I kept hoping that the first few negative reviews of this movie were aberrations, and that sooner or later most of the reviews would be good. I'm hugely disappointed that this is not turning out to be the case. I'm a devoted Wong Kar-Wai fan; I wouldn't pay $70 for five movies I'd never seen for just any director. (That set is worth it, by the way, if you're a fan of In the Mood for Love.) Even that BMW segment he did was good.

You know, I might still have to see this one, no matter how bad everyone says it is.

I've been curious about this film for awhile, and I think I still might see it despite the lackluster review. I'm a sucker for beautiful-to-look-at, even at the expense of other elements. Though holypoop Agente Provocatrice you are definitely right about The Fountain. That was just a big ol' waste of time.

"David Strathairn, Natalie Portman, Jude Law, RACHEL WEISZ? And adorable, soulful little Norah Jones? And you're saying it's not good? Well fuck that. I do believe I will have to see for myself."

I'm with TK on that one. Plus, Nora Jones and Weisz make me have tingles in my bad touch spot.

Thia has nothing to do with this review, but has anyone heard (or heard anything) the new NIN out today? Is it good? Is it bad? Is it ugly? Was that a dumb pun? Certainly was...

Oh, and coveredinbees -- I'm pretty much nuts about all the major actors Wong uses. Maggie Cheung is a goddess, Faye Wong has the charm of Audrey Hepburn, Tony Leung is awesome, and Leslie Cheung is one of the few guys I would go gay for.

When he was alive, I mean, not now.

I've already told you all about my undying love for Tony Leung. It started there.

Word, Coverdinbees, I just adore him. He exuded so much sexual energy in ITMFL, even when he was simply gazing at Maggie Chueng's character.

At first, I thought it was Park Chan-Woon. And thought it was going to be some sort of neon-hyperviolent Korean Blade Runner. Based on the pedigrees of the cast, all of them have done action-adventure-sci-fi. Rachel Weisz getting a couple teeth pulled with pliers. Natalie Portman weeping and chopping people up with a hatchet. Norah Jones going berserker with a flamethrower.

But then I thought it was Chaing Kai-Shek. And then I got even sadder. Because of the plight of his dictatorship.

Then I realized it was Wong Kar-Wei. And that it'd be a pretty Asian painting.

Hee...nice Oldboy reference, Insert, that movie kicks so much ass.

"Over the following few days, lots of hopelessly, unbelievably melodramatic events transpire involving guns, ultimatums, and terrible choices, and then Elizabeth is on her way to Las Vegas."

What the motherfuck huh? My brain just crawled out of my left ear and threw itself into traffic. Maybe my tastes are too pedestrian, but if I want a well lit pie, I'll stop by a Marie Calendar's.

Mmmmmm, Lemon Meringue.

Wong Kar-Wai: The art-house Paul Haggis?

I love Wong Kar Wai because he makes everything seem mysterious and beautiful and exotic. And that works for me, because I'm an American and I can accept a vision of China that looks that way. But I don't think I could watch a vision of America that looks that way without thinking "Yeah, right."

I was about a quarter of the way into this movie when I gave up. I wish they'd replaced Norah with another actress. She's lovely to look at but she seem so forced in the movie.

Despite Wong Kar Wai's lackluster beginnings in Hollywood, he won't disappoint the next time. I hope. I mean the director of the unforgettable "In the Mood for Love" and "2046" would surely not tank. Genius will prevail, i hope.

Manny: Um, no.

I hope they don't re-make "Oldboy" that would just be too cruel. The original stands in itself as a masterpiece, or for that matter I hope they don't touch the trilogy. Park-Chan Woon should garrote them if they ever do a Hollywood version.

Speaking of Asian films, Daniel can I suggest an Unappreciated Gem review or possibly the top ten must see asian films.

Or do we have that already and I missed it?

K, just checkin. Sorry folks, I had a lot of sugar this morning, so be prepared.

Here's an interesting twist: I've come to think as "pretentious" any movie that thinks it's smarter than the viewer. Hence, Superhero Movie is pretentious, because it expects you to be dumb enough to laugh at whatever dumb "jokes" it craps out. Any film aimed at intelligent audiences is not pretentious, because it operates at a mature IQ level and does not talk down to the audience.

You can't put Park Chan-wook in the same league as Wong Kar-wai. Not even close. Oldboy is easily one of the most overrated films of the last ten years. It lacks everything Wong's movies excel at: atmosphere, emotion, existential angst, the lost and found of human connection. My Blueberry Nights is not a very good film, by any stretch. But Wong's oeuvre excelled anything Park has or ever will do by 1995. Chungking Express alone guarantees his place in art cinema history, period. If that sounds pretentious, I'm pretentious enough not to care.

Thia has nothing to do with this review, but has anyone heard (or heard anything) the new NIN out today? Is it good? Is it bad? Is it ugly? Was that a dumb pun? Certainly was...

Ghosts I-IV is all instrumental. 36 tracks and was offered for free on his site, NIN.com. Reznor does not have a label anymore, so this all self produced. Having yet to hear it myself, I cannot pass judgment, but I have seen mixed reviews. I think that it depends upon your views of the man and previous instrumental works.

Oldboy is easily one of the most overrated films of the last ten years.

THANK YOU! God, what a disappointment when I finally got to see it...

anyone else waste 2 hours of their life on The Fountain?

One of the best movies I ever saw. Sorry.

I've had a lady boner for Wong Kar Wai ever since I saw "2046," so as pretentious as this film may be, I'm still going to see it.

Hmm Oldboy, now I want tentacles for lunch.

Oh and Todd, word on Faye Wong. I think she looks like Shannyn Sossamynnayan (or however she spells her stupid name) but without the wooden/dead-eye thing.

I'm with TK on this one, it's hard to believe a movie with this many good actors sucks. But it hurts, because I always agree with Dustin's reviews once I actually see the movie...

And people, why all The Fountain hate? I just watched that movie last week thank you very much. Although, I can see where you're coming from. It's one of those movies where sometimes when I watch it I love it and sometimes I have to turn it off 1/3 of the way through because it's not doing anything for me.

I'm just torn all over the place today. Can't make up my damn mind about anything. Or can I?

Hmm Oldboy, now I want tentacles for lunch.

[GASP!!]

Coveredinbees, shhhh...Godtopus is watching.

pretentious just means slow-moving (There Will Be Blood), quirky (Juno), or awesome (Memento, Amelie).

Heehee.

Oh, and Pen Dragon--duuude, I think you just made me blow my mind in my mouth a little.

(Looks furtively over shoulder, clears throat and says in a booming voice)

SOY TENTACLES! I MEANT SOY TENTACLES.

(please don't smite me)

Julie just saved you from being struck by the mighty Godtopus ink Covered. You owe her.

I accept payment in the form of cash and sexual favors.

See, this is where I'm torn. I know this will be a shitty movie, and yet, it also stars three of my top-5 celebrity crushes: #1 Rachel Weisz, #3 Natalie Portman, and #4 Norah Jones (#2 Jenna Fischer and #5 Shakira were not available, I guess). It's like the perfect storm of hotness.

I mean, aren't I kind of obligated to see this? It's almost like God is taunting me: "Here are three women who you would push starving orphans and limping senior citizens out of the way to get to, but ah yes, there's a catch- you must wade through a sea of Jude Law smarm and overwrought, whiny dialogue in order to enjoy them. (mad cackling)"

Yeah Kay, coveredinink is not what I was going for. Julie, I'm at your disposal. I'll bring the scrabble tiles. . .

Yay!

Abe, because of the crush factor I think you are morally and ethically obligated to watch this movie. When Jude Law appears you can just start singing the score from Little Shop of Horrors...that's what I do when an actor I dislike is featured prominently in a movie.

"In Vegas, working as a cocktail waitress in a casino, Elizabeth meets Leslie (Natalie Portman), a firecracker Texan with one of those overbearing but endearing Anne Richards' accents."

It's official. I'd rather die than see this.

I can't believe I just saw the fabulous "Memento on the same category as the precious-precious "Amelie."

you people are all mad. Talking about fishes and things, when there's a perfectly good movie review to discuss. What, did you all smoke from the Great Internets Bong (GIB, patent pending)?

Seriously, people, stay on task!

Julie

Great, great idea. I think I'll go with "Dentist!" over and over, maybe while roaming up and down the theatre aisles attempting to give out free root canals. It can't be any more painful than sitting through this movie.

"Ah, shut up, open wide, here I come!"

This movie was fucking terrible. I saw it a few months ago, and it was a complete waste of my time.

The worst kind of pretentious is European pretentious films. Especially French. Makes me want to pull my hair out. With tweezers.

I'll probably give this a shot if they show it on cinema here. Just because I love Weisz and Portman. I also like Norah's music. Jude Law annoys the shit out of me, but he CAN do charming without the smarm. So we'll see what he's up to here.

Oh my, scrabble sex is still alive! I think there should be a Scrabble Sex Mania t-shirt. With taco dip. *giggle* The dip gets me every time.

"My brain just crawled out my left ear and threw itself into traffic" -- Godtopus, I wish I could remember this stuff!!!!

A movie where Jude Law ISN'T irksome and overbearing?

I gotta see it to believe it. Besides, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't going to indulge my huge girl-crush on both Norah and Natalie (Rachel ain't bad either).

Norah Jones? Crush? Really.......? I don't get it, maybe it's 'cause I'm a girl?
(The last question mark was not due to any doubt as to my own sex but rather my thinking that her chin seems, well, large, and I can overlook that but ALL HER SONGS SOUND EXACTLY THE SAME. That cannot be overlooked.)

Anyway, the trailer looks fair-to-okay and i love Wong Kar-wai films, so yeah, sign me up for a little pretentiousness.....

anyone else waste 2 hours of their life on The Fountain?

One of the best movies I ever saw. Sorry.

Posted by: twig at April 8, 2008 2:03 PM

Fuckin' A twig. I loved the pants off it, and will stand by that comment until such time as I end up in a bubble ship with a tree and loads of tattoos.

Each to their own, I guess. But it's definintely not a waste of time.

I will see this for the colours.

To be honest, my only interest in this movie would have to be Cat Power. But since it's not supposed to be very good I'll stick with Wong Kar Kai's older work.

Wait, wait. WAIT! WAIT A MINUTE!

David Strathairn, Natalie Portman, Jude Law, RACHEL WEISZ? And adorable, soulful little Norah Jones?

And you're saying it's not good?

Well fuck that. I do believe I will have to see for myself.

-TK

Yeah, I'm boarding the TK Train for this one--this is worth seeing if only for the line-up of intellectual sexiness. Mmm...Jude, Norah and Ms. Portman? Can I get a cherry on top?!?

I love Natalie Portman. And I love Cat Power. And I read that Natalie Portman was the one to get Cat Power to contribute a song to the V for Vendetta soundtrack. And I love that, too. So I'll probably be seeing this.

Especially since one of the stills for this movie shows Natalie Portman and Norah Jones in bed. With each other. Rowr.

A) Estelle Godtopus dose not fall under the catagory of "fishes and things".

B) Julie would this be singing out loud? Or more of the plugging your ears and humming variety? I personally think I would keep saying "Little shop, little shop of horrors! Little shop of terrors!" if someone I disliked came on the screen. It's very fitting.

Norah Jones? Crush? Really.......? I don't get it, maybe it's 'cause I'm a girl?

No, it's not.

Actually the murderous strength of my hatred is all out of proportion to the slightness of her music. But there you have it.

Oh and I'm not sure what llism was correcting, unless Dustin already covered his tracks, but I am still waiting on pronunciations of "Strathairn" and "Postlethwaite".

Still waiting.

WKW is one of the reasons I moved out to Asia ( even though I first ended up in Taiwan thanks to Edward Yang, Tsai Ming-Liang, and Hou Hsaio-hsien), and I was ecstatic on my first encounter with the smelly chaos of the Chungking Mansions in Kowloon. I saw Blueberry Nights here in Guangzhou months ago and was sorely disappointed.

Not only was it Chungking Lite, extending one of the two sequences to a full feature (not that he doesn't work on the same themes in all his films, perhaps from Days of Being Wild, which is just unbelievable even if Tony Leung doesn't appear until the end. (Oh, and I saw a Jacky Cheung concert his summer and he was awesome: like a Vegas/Broadway act in Chinese)) but the fluid cinematography that Chris Doyle, the true drunken master, brought to Wong's films was missed.

Khondji is fantastic, and can certainly do handheld as he proved in Before the Rain, but the mood was off. It hit its only high point in the shot of the swaying traffic lights, arcing back and forth in the lonely morning.
And Norah Jones is no Faye Wong and Jude Law is not a patch on Tony Leung (either of them).

Perhaps WKW was rushed in the edits, and the stars weren't up to the endless re-shoots he demands. Yeah, it's their fault, not Wong's.

I was about a quarter of the way into this movie when I gave up.
Uniformedcupid.c o m - Date someone who really understands the word 'commitment'

Does anybody really watch a Wong Kar-wai film for substance? I know I watch them just because they're really pretty. If I get something else out of it, fantastic. Otherwise, I knew what I was getting into by watching a Wong Kar-wai film.

It's the same reason people play a muted Miyazaki film on their widescreen TV during a party.

Still want to see this for I love the smoky jazz music and pretty cinematography.

Reviewing a Wong Kar-Wai film is kind of a damned if you do, damned if you don't endevor. People like me who just love everything he does will go see his movies, reguardless of what any review says (even a Dustin review, which I usually treat like gospel. Godtopus gospel).

All I need to know is, where is it playing and when.

All right... I'll bite. What is the "Haggisian" monstrosity we're not allowed to mention? Is it Crash? That's the only thing I've been able to piece together, although RanyIt mentioned it recently... Please help me out. Or at it to the ABOUT section.

"... but he goes overboard here with the unnecessary slow-motion close-ups and sets that look like Edward Hopper paintings rendered with a Lite-Brite."

Holy cow. I just saw that in my head. I love this review. Great writing, Dustin.

yea, Indiebass, it's Crash.

I saw it last Sunday. It's not perfect, for sure, but it's a lovely, thoughtful, and romantic film.

Jones is very uneven. She's got the soulful eyes/wounded look down, but she can't pull off angry or very upset at all. But it doesn't kill the movie.

I really wish more people were giving this film a chance. It's a solid three star effort.

And Strathairn will break your little heart.

I don't think Wong had done his best yet!!
"Chungking Express" and "In the Mood Of Love' were mind-blowingly good and amazing but I didn't find myself totally immersed myself in this movie! (I watched it few months ago in Hong Kong).The scenes were beautiful and stylish as usual but not powerful and mesmerizing. I love the metaphor of mixing the ice-cream and bluberry pie!!
Strathairn was the best above all and I could see sadness in his eyes. Rachel, Natalie and Jude were good but not very impressive.I'll skip Norah Jones as I don't have much to say about her!
Wong usually spends quite a lot of time in filming (2046 took several years to finish)but this time he only used few months so he couldn't express himself stongly!! Even if we know the message of this film(Barrier between love whatsoever), we wouldn't be impressed. Also, Englisg isn't our (HongKongers) mother language, this is one of the reasons of the disappointment of it.
Sorry for my poor Eng!

I concur completely with the review but the movie redeemed itself (sorta) when Leslie said, "Well, fuck you very much!" Best line ever.

She is so beautiful!I love her.Maybe many men like her,too.If you want to know her more,you would go to "SeekingRich.com".She is also on "SeekingRich.com",there are a lot of reports about her.

I don't know why everybody hated The Fountain so much. Sure, it was a little on the long side and it fell a bit short of conveying the rich, multifaceted storytelling that it was aiming for, and yeah, maybe it heavily ripped off the novel "The Rag Doll Plagues" by Alejandro Morales, but taking that all into account, i still found it to be like like all my favorite candies; a little syrupy in large quantities, but no less enjoyable because of it.

If you want to find some examples of pretentious film-making at it's finest, just watch any Kevin Smith movie you can get your hands on.

Oh, and thank you for mentioning Memento in the "awesome" category; can't hear enough good things about that movie.