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What NPR Personalities Sound Like They Look Like Versus What They Actually Look Like

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Miscellaneous | Comments (42)

GKedit_jpg_627x325_crop.jpg

Many months ago, I compiled a list of pictures of various NPR (and American Public Media) personalities so that many of us could finally put a picture to the voice and the fact that the post didn’t become the most popular thing on the entire Internet of all time ever still bugs me. I mean, COME ON.

Anyway, something else came down the pipeline today that allowed me to link to that old post in the hopes that it finally becomes SUPER VIRAL, but more importantly, it’s pretty spot on. An artist named Gaelan Kelly sketched out these cartoons of what the NPR personalities looks like in his head based on their voices.

NPR How the voices look in my head.jpg

NPR How the voices look in my head PART 2 by Gaelan Kelly.jpg


That’s pretty much what most of them look like in my head, too. In reality (hyperlink hint, hint), however, he was really only close on Ira Glass, Terry Gross and, of course, Garrison Keillor (who looks more like a cow crossed with Satan).

And because, when else will I have the opportunity to post this news: It looks like Garrison Keillor is reconsidering his retirement, which is the worst thing to happen to NPR since they booted Bob Edwards. Retire goddamnit. You are pompous bloated windbag. I’m pretty sure he’s also a terrorist.

(WBEZ via Reddit)









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Comments

Diane Rehm sounds like she may die in the middle of any sentence.

Posted by: John G. at December 7, 2011 8:20 PM

Who the hell actually listens to "A Prairie Home Companion"? I end up doing a lot of traveling during the weekends and it never fails to piss me off when that crap comes on. Its fucking terrible. And Jesus Christ how the fuck is Keillor even allowed on the radio. Every single one of his sentences end with a whistle and it sounds like he shoves the microphone into his mouth.

Wow...I need to calm down. Whatever it is...that dude's voice puts me into a rage.

Posted by: Diablo at December 7, 2011 8:26 PM

I like Garrison Keillor. And his program is good at certain times.

Posted by: samcvb at December 7, 2011 8:32 PM

Well look at that. I guess I'm not the only one who pictures Click and Clack as the Mario brothers.

Posted by: dr. pisaster at December 7, 2011 8:48 PM

I saw Garrison Keillor before I ever heard him, so...

And I worked at an NPR affiliate for years, so this was amusing to me, because I didn't really have out-of-line perceptions of the hosts' looks.

Oddly enough, though, my radio audience was often perplexed when meeting me in person.

Posted by: Jerry at December 7, 2011 8:52 PM

I have lurked for probably two years and find it highly amusing that this is the subject matter that finally encouraged me to reveal myself. But seriously, how could that previous post NOT have been the most popular thing on the internet?!! It's NPR people! It's NPR and Dustin rolled up into one delicious morsel. Please, let's do right by both of them!

The other reason I de-lurked is to tell you about my sister. She also has images of NPR personalities in her head. She, however, refuses to look at pictures of the actual people, as they influence how she then feels about those people. I think the header pic is okay, though, as Garrison Keillor made her shudder (and not in a good way) long before she ever saw his face.

Posted by: princessbetty at December 7, 2011 9:08 PM

Spot on, chief. Garrison Keillor/"A Prairie Home Companion" are the only reasons I ever don't listen to NPR. I'd rather listen to non-stop pledge drives.

Posted by: RobP at December 7, 2011 9:31 PM

Most of those people look like they have the faces for radio.

Posted by: APOCooter at December 7, 2011 9:50 PM

Shared on Facebook. You owe me a t-shirt now, Rowles.

I actually didn't see the original post until this one, but I'm glad I did. It's been one of the lazy wonders I've had in the back of my head, one that is never satisfied by a quick trip to Google.

Posted by: duckandcover at December 7, 2011 9:59 PM

A Prairie Home Companion comforts me in its wholesomeness, but I do get the feeling Keillor is kind of a cold grinch in person.

Posted by: Dorothy Snarker at December 7, 2011 10:09 PM

I have SUCH a raging hard on for Kai Ryssdal. And I'm a chick.

Posted by: klingonfree at December 7, 2011 10:17 PM

Good lord you guys are insufferable. Nobody is actually supposed to like Prairie Home Companion, but it's a piece of Americana. Does anybody live on fried macaroni alone? No, but if you try to get rid of it you should be hung with piano wire.

Posted by: T at December 7, 2011 10:23 PM

Well. I was hoping this post would be peppered with a young photo of Diane Rehm.

I leave both disappointed, and in a way.. relieved.

Posted by: The Only New Zealander at December 7, 2011 10:56 PM

Diane Rehm isn't that old, really. She has a medical condition that makes her voice sound like that.

Posted by: Miss Quiss at December 7, 2011 11:06 PM

I love Prairie Home Companion. I can't help it. The musical guests are always awful, and it is, at times, quite tedious, but the bedtime-story quality of Keillor's voice will always invoke childhood memories. To hear him is to instantly transport me back to a simpler time...say, the early 90's. My parents, and thus, my siblings and me, listened to him in the car, during dinner, on holidays...in fact, in the presence of the radio, my parents wouldn't allow us to talk during the show unless it was a commercial break.

(I grew up in a family that didn't really watch TV, and listening to PHC on Sunday nights was something of an entertainment highlight. Apparently this has only served to fill me with fond memories.)

Posted by: nosio at December 7, 2011 11:12 PM

I would never voluntarily listen to Prairie Home Companion, but I associate it with great heaping dollops of nostalgia. My best friend when I was a wee thing had a mother who was obsessed with PHC, and you also couldn't talk when it was on in her house.

This was the early 80s, people. That's a HELL OF A LONG TIME AGO. Bitch should retire already.

Posted by: MM at December 7, 2011 11:26 PM

Nosio,

I'm in the exact same boat as you. I can't help but enjoy it due to hearing it for most of my childhood up to now.

Posted by: Alex00 at December 7, 2011 11:26 PM

Diane Rehm was never young. She was born a stately, late middle age women and has stayed that way for centuries.

Posted by: Freller at December 7, 2011 11:28 PM

I'm with you John G. Listening to Diane Rehm is a bit like listing to President Bush 43 - there is listener unease that something unfortunate might happen. In W's case - completely losing his train of thought for example; in Ms Rehm's case, suffering a cardiac arrest. It is a tad discomforting!

Posted by: Lord Copper at December 7, 2011 11:49 PM

Why all the hate on Keillor and PHC ? It's simple, nostalgic old fashioned radio, clearly the whiners here prefer something cooler and a little more groovy (or crucial, whatever the latest word is..).

Posted by: Zipper at December 8, 2011 12:18 AM

Prairie Home was good enough for Robert Altman, and it's good enough for me. I listen every week. And I'm all of 30, live in New York, and go to punk shows in my time off.

The musical guests are great musicians, the bits are hilarious if you actually listen for the subversion, and his novels are super weird and really, really subversive. I do not get the hate, at all. Have you guys actually even listened to it?

I recall this site actually liking the movie - what gives??

Posted by: Tammy at December 8, 2011 12:50 AM

After having met Keillor twice in person now (once at a live show of PHC and once during a speaking tour), I still think he is actually incredibly kind, but also in possession of (as Dorothy Snarker suggests) a well-restrained razor-sharp cynicism. It's as if Jeremy Clarkson was auto-tuned and run-through some heavy-duty filters to sound like the sweetest American grandpa imaginable.

e.g. The second time we met, a girl was getting her photo taken with him and somehow their small-talk revealed that she was quite involved in religious studies. Keillor strongly opposed her views and didn't make any secret of this. But he phrased them in such a way that not only did the situation become humorous and remain inoffensive but they also proceeded to discuss (very civilly) their differing opinions. For about 10 minutes. While everyone else was still waiting to meet him and being devoured by mosquitoes in the meantime.

The point is: it was clear he could have been a real jerk in front of everyone about all of it, but he wasn't. Was this all image maintenance? Maybe. Maybe not.

Aside, I am fond of PHC because it's so completely goofy. Seeing it performed live was a unique experience, especially considering all the other manners and matters by which people are "entertained" these days.

Posted by: kiyo-chan at December 8, 2011 1:24 AM

I need the cartoon version of Nina Totenberg!

I enjoy PHC. It's like someone is reading a story to me and it's all awesome and old timey. I lament that we don't have more radio plays in America, though I'm glad the BBC iPlayer lets me listen to theirs for free.

I think I've even seen PHC on the BBC radio options, except they call it "Garrison Keillor's America" or something and that does worry me slightly.

"This American Life" on the other hand makes me want to rip out my hair. And then my eyeballs so that my screams can drown out the radio. What is your point?? Where are you going??? Be concise! You've taken 20 minutes to say "I have a moderately interesting story to tell and maybe I'll get to it at some point, but first, let me tell you about the 15 hairs on this woman's eyebrows, and she's not really part of the story, but her mother's chicken is, so you need to know about her eyebrows now, and that's why I'm telling you about them, because she sees her mother's chicken through the eyes beneath her eyebrows."

I feel like I'm missing something...like it's a big joke that no one has let me in on.

Posted by: Sbrown at December 8, 2011 9:01 AM

I enjoy the jokes shows because they are at once painful and fantastic. And the magic of their sound effects guy (Foley artist?) makes the show. Is it background noise a lot of the time? Yup. Is it something I'd go to see? Hell no. (Although I would trample your grandmother to get a seat to Wait, Wait...) PHC just sort of is.

Posted by: Mrcreosote at December 8, 2011 9:02 AM

That's exactly how Click & Clack look in my head, too. That's the only thing I listen to on NPR. I don't know the other folks.

Posted by: BWeaves at December 8, 2011 9:25 AM

I love Prairie Home Companion (the radio show. The movie looked awful and I really can't watch Lindsey Lohan). I could listen to "Lives of a cowboy," "Guy Noir," and "Lake Woebegon" all day, and already miss Tom Keith. Sometimes the music guests aren't great, but often they really are (Wailin' Jennys, etc). I will be very sad when it's off the air.

Posted by: chipwitch at December 8, 2011 9:26 AM

I don't think I've ever listened to the entirety of a Prarie Home Companion show, but when my family would take road trips, we'd listen to Lake Woebegone on tape. Lake Woebegone is awesome. Also, it's tagline would fit Pajiba like a glove.

Pajiba: Where all the women are strong, all the men are good looking, and all of the children are (or will be) above average.

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at December 8, 2011 9:33 AM

And what do you mean Click and Clack don't look like this?

http://blogs.cars.com/photos/uncategorized/dusty.jpg

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at December 8, 2011 9:35 AM

The point is: it was clear he could have been a real jerk in front of everyone about all of it, but he wasn't.

And this is why Garrison Keillor will never be anything like Jeremy Clarkson in any iteration because Clarkson would have been a complete jerk to the girl he disagreed with and not allowed anybody else to get a word in.

Re: PHC, the music is fantastic. It's genuine roots music for the most part and one of the only mainstream outlets for incredibly talented musicians. The rest of the show I can take or leave but the music is really worth it.

Posted by: PaddyDog at December 8, 2011 9:50 AM

Did a character on COMMUNITY say, at one time, that they didn't like Garrison Keillor or PHC? That would be the only reason why Dustin wouldn't like it...

Posted by: CamperVanMozart at December 8, 2011 9:55 AM

Or maybe Garrison said something negative about those fucking Muppets...?

Posted by: CamperVanMozart at December 8, 2011 9:58 AM

Saw Keillor's one-man show a couple years ago and it was amazing considering a man in his 70s who had just recovered from a mild stroke talked and sang nonstop for more than an hour and a half and never took so much as a sip of water. (He also occasionally used a selection of language that he doesn't use on the radio.) When he walked off the stage at the end, Mrs. , and I were stunned to look at our watches and realize he had been rambling on for about 100 minutes. We had thought it was just an intermission.

BTW, he sold out the house, about 1,400 seats, at $45 a pop. Said he flew into the nearest big city, declined the host's offer of a ride and drove himself to our town, did his show at 4 p.m. and was likely back home and in his own bed by 10 or so.

Run the math on that one.

Posted by: , at December 8, 2011 10:20 AM

Click and Clack (Car Talk) have the best show on NPR. The others don't suck, but Click and Clack are a delight. Too bad I don't get to listen to them very often.

Posted by: Slash at December 8, 2011 12:04 PM

I long lived under the assumption that one of the prerequisites for being an on-air personality at NPR was some sort of audible speech defect.

That said, NPR is on in my house whenever we're home. Except Saturday evenings. When PHC is on.

I think we have found another one of those things that cuts the world's population (or at least NPR listeners) in two: love/hate for PHC.

Posted by: space oddity at December 8, 2011 12:28 PM

Click and Clack are great, but Wait Wait Don't Tell me is by far my favorite show. I also have fond memories of my parents listening to What D'Ya Know on my way home from swimming lessons on Saturdays as a kid.

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at December 8, 2011 12:35 PM

PHC was a family tradition through out my life until I left for college. I've seen G.K. in person once, when he was in Seattle a few years back. I LOVE LOVE LOVE HIM, he is awesome, and he is quite funny as well. (I'm straight).

I grew up on NPR, so all of these faces feel like family too me. Tom and Ray Mollizazi are funny awesome, and thankfully I know most of my car related stuff thanks to them.

to the wacky right wing tea party nut jobs infesting your view on this site; I say this, "go troll where you're appreciated, like Occupy places, its your liberal nutjobbery which is destroying Public radio and Public television, and the fact that your braincells are not large enough to realize this, is evident in your attacks."

Posted by: Lord-ninja at December 8, 2011 3:12 PM

I always think of Click and Clack as Muppets. Whenever I catch Prairie Home Companion, which isn't often, I feel like I'm left out of a joke.

I also intentionally mishear Steve Inskeep as "Steve-inski" and imagine him as the dorm bro of NPR.

Posted by: Jettison at December 8, 2011 3:21 PM

I do that every time I heard Steve-inksy's name as well.

Steve-isnky. The Steverino. Reading co-py!

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at December 8, 2011 3:25 PM

"Diane Rehm sounds like she may die in the middle of any sentence."
True, and I wonder what it is that causes that and also wonder why she is still on the air because she sounds like it hurts to speak. Not that her reporting isn't astute or that her mind is gone, but I thought there was something seriously wrong with her. I thought she was a million years old, but her photo makes her look maybe mid-50s, or younger if she is prematurely gray.

Posted by: Viking at December 8, 2011 4:01 PM

Yeah, I can't listen to Diane Rehm. She's sharp and informed, but I just find that voice unlistenable.

I have a book that Click & Clack wrote back in the 90s, and their pictures are on the cover. They really aren't that far off from the Mario Brothers. I've never been a car person, but I could listen to their show for hours on end.

I don't listen to Prairie Home Companion, but I thought Altman's movie version was pretty good.

No Brian Lehrer in these pictures? I enjoy listening to him in the mornings. This inspired me to look up his photo. Not what I pictured.

Posted by: DarthCorleone at December 8, 2011 4:17 PM

How many attempts does it take me to spell Steve-inski in a phonetically correct way? Apparently, it's at least three.

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at December 8, 2011 5:21 PM

In case you guys didn't know, Diane Rehm sounds like a deflating windbag going through an erratic voice box because she has spasmodic dysphonia which makes her larynx twitch, I think.

Posted by: jeaux schmeaux at December 8, 2011 11:56 PM