web
counter
 

The Weekly Murdertank: The Depressing Idiocy of America, the Sexualization of Evil, and Natalie Portman's Poor Masturbation Practices

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Miscellaneous | Comments (6)



black-swan-port[1].jpg

This Week in Reviews

  • Just Go With It

  • The Eagle

  • Orgasm, Inc.

  • “Justified” Season Two

  • “Traffic Light” Review

  • “Mr. Sunshine”

  • RuPaul’s “Drag Race”

  • “Chicago Code”


    The 10 Most Popular Posts of the Week

  • 10 Pop-Culture Facts That Hammer Home the Reality of Just How Depressingly Dumb Americans Are

  • 5 of Kristen Stewart’s Most Determined Efforts to Smile

  • Recasting the Major Superhero Movies with Vintage Hollywood Stars

  • All in the Family: The Top 5 People in Hollywood You Didn’t Know Were Related

  • The 5 Best Super-Bowl Commercials of 2011

  • The Sexualization of Evil: What Happened to the Wicked Old Witch?

  • What Do Swimming, Frogs, and Black Swan Have In Common?

  • 5 Nuggets of Knowledge You Can Use to Ruin Someone Else’s Day

  • Let these 7 Men Show You How to Win Valentine’s Day

  • The Hollywood A-List Movie Star Assessment









    Each Time You Like, Share, Tweet or Stumble a Pajiba Post, An Angel Does the Paul Rudd Dance



    Just Go With It Review | Beach Music by Pat Conroy









    Comments

    "The Depressing Idiocy of America"

    Coming just after reading a news article about Ron Paul getting tongue-kissed by the CPAC as the climax (hurr hurr) of their Parteitag, I can appreciate the irony of that remark.

    No, wait, not irony.

    What is the word I'm looking for?

    Ah, yes. I meant to say 'truth.'

    Posted by: The Wanderer at February 13, 2011 12:55 PM

  • Love that. "Poor masturbation practices." As if anyone else could be the judge of your masturbation practices; if the sole aim of that act is getting off, then if you DO get off, it would seem your practice has made perfect.

    And anyone who thinks you're "doing it wrong" is perfectly free to go fuck themselves.

    In ANY MANNER THEY SEE FIT.

    Posted by: Maryscott O'Connor at February 13, 2011 2:09 PM

    Maryscott, quite so!

    Posted by: The Wanderer at February 13, 2011 2:55 PM

    If natalie would like to practice I would be happy to observe and critique.

    Posted by: clancys_daddy at February 13, 2011 4:48 PM

    People need to get over Ashworth making fun of that masturbation scene. Portman does look like a floundering weirdo doing it and if you do it exactly the way she did it in that scene you look like a "dying frog" too. Go ahead and own it if that's how you like it but you're still doing it awkwardly. I can brush my teeth with my toes but it's still awkward as hell even if I don't get cavities.

    Posted by: becks at February 14, 2011 11:08 AM

    Yeah, for a community that thrives on making fun of things, the hop on Pop on that article was weird. I thought the comparison was apt, and funny. I didn't thing Ashworth was saying someone needed to slap her hand for it; just that it was awkward.

    Posted by: Ian at February 14, 2011 12:01 PM