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The Weekly Caption Contest

By Michael Murray and Replica | Miscellaneous | August 10, 2012 | Comments ()


Screen Shot 2012-08-10 at 10.27.16 AM.png

Last week we had many brilliant submissions sent to us to accompany the graphic that Replica presented. It was amazing that even though there were Japanese gymnasts doing bendy things and perfectly smooth divers cavorting in little hot tubs to watch on TV, that you still had time to participate, and for that each and every one of you should get a medal. As it is, we're only allowed to select three finalists, and so it was.

For a refresher, this was the image:

hangover-house.gif

The final three were these:

3. From mrcreosote...

"Hangover House, the leading fast food restaurant in New Orleans fully supports gay marriage, but they draw the line at gay line dancing."

2. From NateS1973...

Ch. 5 - In Which Pooh Bear Learns That Aspirin Won't Bring A Dead Hooker Back To Life

1. From Figgy...

"All Carl had wanted was a safe place to vomit. He hadn't expected to fall in love."

As selecting a winner was proving very difficult, I submitted the problem to the Ouija Board, and the spirits spelled out FUNGO, and so we award the prize to Figgy! Well done, Figgy!! If you send us your mailing address, we will make sure that the prison authorities deliver to you the DVD copy of Jersey Shore Shark Attack that you just won! Perhaps you can use it to trade for some sort of lotion.

The image that Replica has provided this week is this:

valentine.jpeg

The question I ask is, "What is the woman thinking?"

And as always, the winner will get a DVD copy of Jersey Shore Shark Attack, signed by John Travolta.




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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not


  • "the outfit's ridiculous,
    You know I'm not lying,
    But relax boy, you had me at
    I'm Conan O'Brien"

  • POINGjam

    Tune in again next week for the continuing adventures of Captain Rape Baby.

  • willmont

    When youve got that irregular feeling, Conan Obrien swears by Sweet Suppositories. In regular cherry or new zesty tangerine.

  • richitems

    Hey, ocupado buddy!

  • Mrs. Julien

    She is thinking: The Restraining Order really should have been much more specific.

  • bleujayone

    In Soviet Russia, matryoshkas dolls open you!

  • TheFatling

    When confronted with a Magic Ray, a rubber is your best bet to prevent both pregnancy and vaginal electrocution.

  • googergieger

    It's like a Koala Bear crapped a rainbow in my brain.

    (I know it's sealab. First thing that popped into my head for some reason)

  • mrcreosote

    I didn't know "magic" was the code word for embarrassingly small there Captain Kewpie Doll. I'll just hang out here until that rash around your mouth clears up.

  • Em

    I said I'd man the glory hole, but this is just ridiculous.

  • Maguita NYC

    "Hello, is this Em?
    Please hold, Mr. Travolta would like to speak with you..."

  • BWeaves

    New! Improved! Captain Nipplecheeks powers away the scum, so you don't have to! Now in new Sweet scent!*

    *Use in well ventilated area. May cause mild breakthrough bleeding. Don't get any red on you.

    MADE IN U.S.A.

  • Puddin

    While dismayed that her latest attempt at escape had been thwarted, Princess Charlene of Monaco couldn't help but be impressed that such a small principality could have such advanced ray gun technology.

  • TheEverGuest

    "The Herrlichkeit Loch-ness Monster"

  • L.O.V.E.

    What is the woman thinking?

    "They are not paying me enough to act in this Ru Paul stage production of 'XX-Men'."

  • Drake

    The power of Gaydar compels you!

  • Kip Hackman

    Daniel Tosh is taking the rape thing kinda far...

  • MichaelEhrgott

    "Good to see Syndrome from The Incredibles still getting work."

  • timothy conard

    He's magic-raying through your walls, and he's snatching your people up. Tryna rape 'em so you get better hide your kids, hide your wife, and hide your husbands cuz they're rapin' errybody out der.

  • Drake

    Joel Schumacher's re-imagining of "The Cask of Amontillado" is expected to be next summer's big blockbuster.

  • dizzylucy

    Should have upgraded the to Creep Resistant igloo...

  • Karl Kaefer

    Good Lord, that's all I need... a fey, scanitly caped meshugganah.

  • LizLemon

    "50 shades of ginger is way kinkier!"

  • TheOriginalMRod

    Wait... why do they have nipples in their face cheeks?!?!

  • llp

    Why would they have nipples in ANY cheeks?

  • BWeaves

    Oops, I see we both thought the same thing about their cheeks.

  • She responds:
    Your "Magic Ray"
    sure won't last long
    So I'll stay inside
    with my latex dong

  • And on a side note, I didn't know they had invented the official "Ginger, please" face that long ago.

  • Wednesday

    eHarmony really needs to upgrade their algorithm for calculating 29 dimensions of compatibility. They place way too much weight on the chocolate and gamma ray questions.

  • Even supehero Cupie Dolls are rapey bros these days.

  • "My impregnable wall can withstand rape culture, but not Super Rape Culture!"

    Get it, impregnable?

  • Sara_Tonin00

    ooh, did somebody downvote you for a rape joke? lame.

  • Pinky McLadybits

    "I fucking hate playing snow forts with Johnny."

  • Pinky McLadybits

    "Fucking Mormons."

  • spljt

    Didn't Johnny Depp already do ginger in Alice in Wonderland?

  • Melina

    Rapists from the future sure are easy to spot.

  • Ted Zancha

    STALKER BOY- He will follow you around, call your parent's house, and cover you with puss from his AMAZING pimples of love.

  • mswas

    ewwwww

  • Green Lantern

    "Super Creepytot learned some valuable lessons about love and loss that day. Sadly, none were applicable to his magic ray ability."

  • Bert_McGurt

    McKayla is not impressed by magic rays.

  • mswas

    "Fred, get the taser again!" The Super Taser, guaranteed to fend off Magic Ray, Magic Mike, or any magic man.

  • TheOriginalMRod

    Sweet. The new date rape drug. Coming out just in time for Valentine's Day.

  • blacksred

    Dammit he isn't from the American Olympic rowing team!
    http://abcnews.go.com/US/olymp...

  • the other courtney

    The Power of Xenu Compels You: A dating guide for Scientologists, as penned by Tom Cruise.

  • Romeo Cranberry

    The Magic Ray is my penis.

  • ZombieMrsSmith

    "I can't even see your Magic Ray in those tights. I don't doubt it won't last long. I'm holding out for Magic Rummel."

  • $27366904

    Rush Limbaugh's secret love child. A masked over-grown child superhero, zapping those high-cost, pill-popping whores away.

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