Pajiba

Sorry, Mr. Hamill earned life long respect and adoration when he voiced the Joker on Batman: The Animated Series.

But seriously, I do love me some boobies. AM I RIGHT?!

Don't fuck with the Jedi Master, son!

so I'm trying to help my friend with some pre-calc homework over AIM, but I haven't taken pre-calc in about 5 years and its all been pushed out to make room for all the following calcs. So, does anybody here know pre-calc?

His tour de farce was Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back.

Pre-calc? My brain hurts just reading that.

And Sabrina's weekend is obviously off to a way better start than mine.

I think we should change the name of The Weekend Hijack Thread to

The Weekend Thread Dump

then the picture at the top can be a pic of someone's dumper, or maybe a poster of a shitty movie or a pic of someone who looks like they are taking a dump

The ass belongs to some random model. If you do a search on c-in2 brand of underwear and go to pics, there's tons of pictures of asses and packages of the models they use. Some even nicer than that one.

Mark Hammill cemented his place as the greatest actress of our generation when he accepted the roll of Cock Knocker and punched Jay in the balls.

My brother just informed the family that his crazy-ass wife is divorcing him. Most likely leaving him with their 2 kids. I am sad for him, but she is truly a nutjob.

Her parents (both of whom are gay, not that there's anything wrong with that)have totally fucked her up for any man. They both decided they were gay when she was about 12 and totally abandoned her to go pursue their gayness. She was living on her own when she was 16 because she couldn't visit her mom at her mom's partner's house because the partner didn't like kids. Blah, blah, blah. And her dad went off to another state to be gay so no one in her hometown would know he is gay. blah, blah, blah.

My brother always went for crazy chicks. Hopefully he'll find a nice normal girl someday.

Thanks for the forum, Pajiba. I needed to vent.

I therapize middle-schoolers for a livin'. One girl I was trying to help become a more productive member of society said that other kids were "always talkin'" about her. When I asked what sorts of things they said, she replied with the completely unexpected, "They said I killed all my cats and ate them." My.job.rules.

When I asked what sorts of things they said, she replied with the completely unexpected, "They said I killed all my cats and ate them."

HAHAHAHA oh shit that's amazing.

I need about few more hours of sleeping till I get coherent and right now I am in my vegitative half-insomnia though its 3 effin pm in afternooon mode, did i say incoherent? yeah that's enphasis of the day.

And thanks for putting the image of old man Brad Pitt diggin Mark Hamil's actressing Cock-Knocker ass and vice versa. Now I can truly sleep in peace.

No no no no no. Rowles, if history has taught us anything it is that a revolution or an uprising can not be directed by the very people whom the uprising is directed at. You can not dictate our revolution as you see fit. Any comment thread that you post Rowles must have the potential to be blown up by a Molotov cocktail thrown by any member of the pajiba community if indeed ideas are to be free flowing here, that is what makes pajiba a thing of beauty. I understand that you want to control this machine that you have built, but you must let it run free if is to be truly free. That is way I didn't get upset yesterday when stipe42 savagely, viciously, and unmercifully attacked my mother and I.

Pookie X

OK, my wish has been granted, so let's get this party started.

I don't believe I've ever stated exactly how old I am, thought I've dropped many hints, especially in the music threads. But I've been wondering lately if my life is essentially over. So here's a question for the Pajibettes:

How old does a man have to be before you would absolutely under no circumstances never never never even consider fucking him? And state any qualifiers (wealth, hunkiness etc.) that might give you pause.

Think of this as a research project, you know, like I'm Kinsey ... Aw shit, I just age-outed myself again.

Boobies - I have two, very nicely sized and shaped. I came into them later in the game (something about a hormone imbalance triggered by a hysterectomy which kicked me through pseudo-puberty, according to the docs). Anyway, I have two. Can't find a single bra that fits comfortably, they're too significant to do without one, and they're really dense, so mammograms suck like a Hoover. So that's a drawback.

On the other hand, they're much younger than the rest of me so they won't start banging on my knees until I'm at least 70.

Boobies. That's my story.

Ah, Galaga. 3 hours on one quarter. Those were the days...

The rule of thumb is woman's age +/- 7 years. If you can look like you're within that age range, we can fudge a little and make a little leeway. But there's only one Hugh Hefner, and while he gives extremely unrealistic hope to the rest of you, he is the exception that proves the rule.

Sorry -- I know of at least three guys, all 40 or nearly so, seriously dating, or married to, and screwing, regularly, early-20s women. Girls, if you will.

I think they're all latent pedophiles, and that's not just the envy talking. "Hey Nineteen", really -- you have to wonder what they find to talk about in between the constant, sweaty sex?

Mr. Lower is 10 years younger than me, folks. Older men never did it for me. Remember, forty goes in to eighty more times than eighty goes in to forty. Fuck pre-calc, that's your math lesson for the day.

The rule of thumb is woman's age +/- 7 years.

Horseshit. Pure, lumpy, stinky, road apples.

Can you honestly say that there isn't any men that are way older/younger than 7 years that women wouldn't allow to drive the skin bus down the pink highway?

I don't believe women are any different than men, if you wants to fucks, you want to fucks. Once in a while you may have to bang a sea donkey, but that's the price you pay. That dick isn't going to fellate itself. (Unless you're Ron Jeremy)

Neodiogenes, mind your own goddamn business, they are all consenting adults. Heavens to mergotroid! Somebody's fuckin'!

Finally. The Saturday Night Losers Club. I knew there were others.

Emily, I have the small boob thing going too and I like it that way.

Daddy, I've fucked young women and older women. The older women hands down know how to work their pussies. I cut my teeth on long dickin' older women. For all of you that don't know what long dickin' is, it is when you pull your dick almost all the way out of the pussy before you stick it back in, but go real slow so she can enjoy it. And short dickin' is when you use very short jabs to hit the pussy.

I'm so glad that there is this thread tonight. I have to work, stupid tax season, and I think this maybe the only thing getting me through the night.

bucdaddyMy "suggestion" when I date, yes I have both rules and suggestions, is that I don't date anyone 15 year older. I'm 29. Anything above that and we stray into the "Daddy Issues" territory, and I have had enough of those to last a life time.

I was just reading about that somewhere as a matter of fact. Some of the people are happy - and want their side of India shown. They say that people only make films about wealthy India. And others think the movie casts a bad light, or is shameful.

But since I doubt you really want to discuss it, I just meant that it's nicer when you do talk about other things besides how deep you went with whom.

I think I may have read the same article or I read it online somewhere. Apparently some of India's wealthy class were dismayed at India being shown in such a negative light. I suspect that they are still upset at trying to clean up the incident in Mumbai. I'm hoping Slumdog does win and maybe it can be an impetus for others to throw their hat in the ring as it relates to film making.

I'm praying that the "Dark Knight" win just so Ledger's legacy can be cemented.

Well Cindy I've been married to the love of my life for over 15 years and we have a son. I come to pajiba just for fun, to past the time. I speak Spanish fluently, I'm 42, and I was an all state Tuba player in high school and I work for the government (don't ask).

I can understand that it's difficult to see the difficulties of poverty and corruption in one's country up on the big screen like that. But at the same time, it could bring more filmmakers to the area, and in turn that could bring jobs and money for people. And plenty of countries have had their dark sides put on display in the film world. Meanwhile, what stands out about the film isn't negativity, but rather the triumph of spirit.
I think Ledger's win is certain.

How old is your son? Fifteen years is something to be proud of, and it's nice to hear you refer to your wife as the love of your life. Coincidental to your job - in a certain way - I'm watching Burn After Reading right now.

Squeeziee - it's pretty easy to get around the 21 thing. You just have to stick to house parties instead of bars. I think we've had some pretty comprehensive discussions on boobs here before. I like being little 'cause I don't have to wear bras and I never have a problem with clothes. I tutor this HS junior who has boobs as big as her own head, and they're nice and all, but all her clothes make her look way thicker in the middle than I suspect she actually is 'cause the boobs cause this tenting effect.

Burn After Reading, very interesting you should say that. He's four, and the secret to a happy marriage is to find a passion for something, anything.

Aha! Pookie the secret agent? Four is a lovely age.
That's an interesting thought about marriage. I've been thinking communication, work, and the ability to ride the roller coaster are important.

I'm now reading an article you might find interesting: What Do Women Want?

Is that ass the male answer to Odette Yustman's Girl In Panties from The Unborn? Are you ass-serving, Dustin?

The rule of thumb is woman's age +/- 7 years.

Horseshit. Pure, lumpy, stinky, road apples.

I have to agree with that. I'm not deriding anyone who has a rule of thumb (as I used to) in regard to age, but every situation is different, and depends entirely on the people involved.

One of my best friends is a guy who was exactly twice my age when we met (25 and 50). He's a hell of a lot of fun to be around, and our age difference has never been an issue in the friendship setting. Now, a handful of years down the road, I come to find out that he's also an incredible kisser. Like, incredible. I feel like I've spent a good chunk of my life dating immature, emotionally stunted and selfish little boys, and am now suddenly being wooed by a thoughtful, caring, sexy-as-hell man. Who does amazing things with his hands.....I may need a moment here........

Anyway, it may not be for everybody, but different strokes for different folks, you know.

Speaking of strokes (and because I know all you happy horndogs love the details), due to current ridiculous life circumstances, the aforementioned man and I have not yet been able to do the deed. It's coming though (pun obviously intended for your pleasure). So on a cold clear night in the very near future, that blinding glow you see on the western horizon will be my pelvic region going nuclear.

AND, he loves my smallish boobies.

By the time I got used to having really small boobs and bought cute bras to dress up the really small boobs, they grew two cup sizes. Now I have boobs that are on the smaller end of medium. I'm scared to buy cute bras now in case it happens again.

I haven't seen Slumdog Millionaire or Benjamin Button, so boobs are just about all I've got, conversation wise, this evening.

I'm also going to throw my vote in for the +/- 7 years age limit being horseshit. In my view, age is nothing but a number (within reason of course. 82 and 18 is pushing it.) What really matters is the person themselves. My husband is only 6 years older than I am, but if he were 8 or 10 or 15 I never would have thought twice about dating and then marrying him. We even met at different stages in our lives (I was at the beginning of college and he was out of college for a few years), but it didn't matter a damned bit.

OK, does the age range change as a woman ages? When you're 20, I imagine 30 seems ancient. When you're 40, does 60 really seem so old?

And hey, don't think of it as "age," think of it as "experience"!

*What a sad, pathetic little man I am*

Does the concept of a "sugar daddy" still exist?

And who's drinking what?

I've got Evan Williams black label in a jigger shooter with Classic Coke here. Esquire recommended Williams as the best cheap bourbon, and I must say it's ... OK for $14.30 a liter, about half the price of my Jack Daniel's.

Live, from Morgantown, it's Saturday Night!

Rum, Dad's Root Beer & John Malkovich. Fanfugutastic.

Oh, and older women kick ass.

I know when I was 18, 19, 20 the thought of doing the dirty with someone in his 50s was nothing less than horrifying. And now, that's exactly what I'm doing. Oh, what a difference a decade can make! And you're right, bucdaddy, age is nothing other than experience.

Tonight, I'm going with my usual route to alcoholism: Beer and tequila. At home. By myself. In my pajamas. Hell yes! Life is fantastic!

Hey y'all! I'm so happy that TPTB have decided to give us a little sandbox to throw around the shit from the neighborhood kitties found in the corner. What that didn't happen in your neighborhood? Huh.

Anyeay, saw Slumdog Millionaire tonight and really enjoyed it. I like refreshing movies. :)

bucdaddy, yes "sugar daddies" still exist. But not any where near where I live. My personal rule for dating is if the guy was in high school before or at the time of my birth he's probably too old. But I'm an older guy kind of girl and I've never been that interested in guys around my age due to the fact that they're usually not that mature. If a guy is even a year younger I usually wait and see much longer than if he's my age or older.

I'm willing to date a guy older than my norm if there's genuine attraction and he doesn't have kids my age.

In other news I'm graduating college on Monday and I'm working on my last project this weekend (a short film), but right now I've got a sore stomach so I'm not quite up for getting giddy about it.

bucdaddy, it would genuinely depend on the guy. When I was 19, I had a guy who was 31 come onto me, but I really wasn't into it. Of course, the fact that he was my professor may have had something to do with it.

But it really does depend on the girl, I know women my age that like older guys because they're more dependable. Also, they tend to own their own houses, cars, etc. and are much less likely to make you pay off their student loans.

Pajibettes, You are my kind of women. "Big Love," anyone?

Yow! The Evan Williams kicks in aftre three shots and the belly burn commences (all typos responsiobility of E. Williams Esq.,)

You make movies too Kayanne? I've produced a couple of films in my day.

You could say that. It's something I enjoy and I thought about making it my concentration, but I went in a slightly different direction. I've taken a few classes dealing with the subject and really like all aspects of film making.

I'm almost afraid to ask this, but what kind of films do you produce?

The way I see it, since she's older, we should both be dead at the same time. Wait...

*mentally checks list of "bad" habits*

Anybody know where I can find a fertile 65 year old woman?

OK, does the age range change as a woman ages? When you're 20, I imagine 30 seems ancient.

Heh. Not to me. I could go anywhere almost up to my dad's age. He's 36 years older than me. This is all hypothetical since I don't have sex, but yeah. I like old guys. And not for their money.

balls. I like the open thread but I have a feeling constantly having to refresh the page is gonna drive me nuts. (btw did I drunkenly suggest an open thread last weekend on some movie review or did I dream that?)

bucdaddy We're probably way past your question, but it intrigued me. I'm 38 and I'd honestly say I'd probably go all the way deep into the 60s if we're talking about decent looks, a good personality and a kick-ass brain. Of course there has to be a physical attraction, but I regularly point out older men who are still, in my opinion, pretty damn hot. Mr. Beaverhausen is 40 and I think he's still a young pup.

I don't know why I stopped short of the 70s. There's something about that decade that's just way too far off for me. However, I am enough of an old lady in a younger body that I'd love spending time with a man of that age range. Just discussing everything under the sun. Get to be old enough and you're a Living Time Machine, as Ray Bradbury would put it. And I LOVE time machines.

Hey older folks need love, too, right?

Kayanne I'd say I prefer guys between 1 and 6" taller than me. I guess I could go shorter for someone with the right personality, but it isn't much of a problem since I'm only 5'4". I did once date a guy that was a full foot taller than me, which cause some logistics issues. I had to crane my neck an awful lot and if we wanted to kiss standing up I pretty much had to stand on something, even if I was wearing heels. We never got as far as sex, but I feel like the height would be awkward there too. No kissing possible while facing eachother and how would doggy style work? I'd have to stand on a footstool or something.

Oh and I forgot this: I've never gone for younger than myself. Ever. I mean, yes, a birthday gift of taking a 16 year old's virginity when I was 17, big whoop.

But other than that, I've never had any sort of relations with men younger than I am. I hear my girlfriends oooo-ing and squeeing over Daniel Radcliffe and it ooks me out. He's a FETUS, ladies. A fetus with a weenus. That's just GROSS. He could be your son. Ew.

Michael Scott in a nightclub: "It's great! Yeah, it's like....a very sexy....preschool."

Exactly.

As for height, I just watched the 30 Rock with Peter Dinklage and now have a crush on him.

Sabrina, we are kindred spirits! Seriously, not only was it sexy that he legitimately wanted a sane and healthy relationship (anyone else have the problem of guys crying for a normal girl and then dating only pyscho ones?) but that he transferred her to make prank phone calls to the UN. Also, as a nerdy girl I feel like I have hope.

Anastasia Beaverhausen, at 21, I don't get the Dan Rad love either. He is a baby. My dating philosophy: I date men, not boys. Hence my lack of attraction for anyone with the maturity of a high schooler.

Seriously, not only was it sexy that he legitimately wanted a sane and healthy relationship (anyone else have the problem of guys crying for a normal girl and then dating only pyscho ones?) but that he transferred her to make prank phone calls to the UN.

Ahhh, so hot! "Please. Hold." And his "shut it down" at the end was perfect. I almost want to stake out the UN building now and look for a guy just like him. Funnily enough, the first guy I made out with in NY was actually a diplomat, but he was also a creeper.

Sabrina, you may be all over the place, but you have to get where the gettin' be good. If he's a good man and he happens to suffer the misfortune of being a few years younger than you and that's his only fault, well then go forth and prosper.

Also, what is with the fake boobies on this Rock of Love show that's on right now? They look like dodge balls. That cannot be comfortable. I'd think they're posture would be all off, but their heels are at least 5-inches, so that helps 'em standing up straight, but I still feel like gravity is being defied.

RAH. Breasts. Everyone seems to have wonderful ones. Big ones. Small ones. Medium ones. Perky ones. And more than half the girls I know are unhappy with them. WTF? They look GREAT. Perfectly sized for your body! And you're complaining?

I have freak breasts. Oh yay, half of me went through puberty and the other half...didn't. Two different sized breasts that have been that way for five years. And not even just in the sense that one is proportionally bigger than the other. I mean it looks like I stole a breast each from two different women. One looks pre-pubescent, the other looks like a man boob. Or something. You know how guys are like "Well, as long as you're naked I'm happy"? Ha! I wish it were that simple! You know there's something wrong when even the most desperate guys want you to put your bra back on.

Gorram, frakking breasts. Just have to wait until I'm twenty-five. Apparently that's when they stop growing/you can give up hope. Just a little longer. And if hormones don't kick in and balance my top half with my oh-so-womanly hips, surgery or babies! Can't decide which yet...

The real rule for guys:

Take half your age and add five.

You can be anywhere between 18 and 26 to get an 18-year-old.

So if you are 30 you can go as young as 20.

If you are 40 you can get a 25-year old.

If you are 50 you can go as young as 30.

If you are 60 you can go as young as 35.

After 60 all bets are off.

Okay, I'm hijacking here. I went to a Kevin Smith Q & A last night in Hartford, and that man is fucking hysterical. Also, there are a lot of people in Hartford that just scare me. Really. And, hey to the guy in front of me who got up three or four times-dude, buy some better fitting pants. I don't need to see your crack. No, no I don't.
If you get a chance though, go to one of these things. They're fantastic.

I had to crane my neck an awful lot and if we wanted to kiss standing up I pretty much had to stand on something, even if I was wearing heels.

It feels awkward on the other side too. Nobody's fault! I'm not gonna put down someone for being significantly shorter than me, but I definitely feel comfortable being more of a match. Some women really want someone looming over them and, well, guess it won't be me.

Cindy, that article's a little scary. Fortunately, if test subjects want to be dishonest, there's at least places like Pajiba where the female honesty is gory and brutal. Very brutal. But it's good to start with the truth!

I gotta weigh in here. I used to only go for guys older than me. It wasn't a conscious choice, really, it just worked out that way. My paradigm recently shifted, however. Currently there is 6 feet, 6 inches of ridiculously sexy 22 year old chew-toy still sleeping like the baby he is in my bed, and I'm sorry but I doubt I will ever go back to fellas my age. Because you know why? HIS DICK WORKS. All weather, all terrain, no matter what THAT SHIT WORKS, and it works flawlessly. Also, his balls are all high-and-tight and there ain't NOTHIN wrong with that.

I don't know what I'll do when he gets too old for me. Maybe he has some younger friends.

Oh, and I think Pookie might be right about older women. My chew toy certainly seems to echo Pookie's sentiments.

i just read the entire thread, and the whole time i couldn't stop thinking about how the ass in the main picture is so firm it's making me a little uncomfortable.

It was really fucking bizarre, but hilarious and mmm...George Clooney.

Pretty much. George's moment of anguish in the basement's one of the more absurdly hilarious things I've seen.

As a 6'1" woman, I have never dated anyone taller than I am. I would like to, it has never happened. Most of the tall men I meet are intimidated, and can't handle it. I actually had one or two tell me my height was unnatural or "If you were a foot shorter, you would be perfect." Typically I have found guys about 5'10" do not have a problem with it. I don't go any shorter than 5'10" too many guys start calling me "mommy" and want to lay their head on my breasts, which is not okay with me.

My neck is sore as hell from headbanging while singing "Bohemian Rhapsody" at a kickass karaoke joint.

I would like to thank alcohol for a sweet, curse-strewn, shot-pounding, baby-puntingly blissful weekend.

Show me a single older woman with an AARP card in her purse and I'm in love.

I'm about to Jack this Shit.
I just got back from a "Leadership Institute" for the Fraternity.
Hundreds of Dudes from around the country.
No Alcohol, drugs or cell phones.
"Bro" can be a noun, verb or adjective.
Some Fratboys still quote Borat incessantly.
No Girls, No Alcohol, No Internet.
Team Building Exercises and Group Sessions.
No Alcohol.
No TV and No Beer Make Homer something something

Mark Hamill is pure awesome, and I will hear no one say otherwise.

Anna: Sheee-yit, I'm having a billboard taken out on Monday so that everyone in my area will know what I get to schlepp home with me. That sweet, sassy son-of-a-bitch picked me up and THREW me across the room onto the bed. It was, as they say, on like Donkey Kong. I made him scream like a girl- it was awesome. Then later I made him go to the store and buy me cigarettes and a case of beer. See, when you get 'em right from their mommas you can train 'em up. It's the difference between buying tomatoes from Winn Dixie or picking them fresh from the vine in your own backyard. And maybe the years of experience isn't there, but I think the DFW (Down For Whatever) Factor makes up for anything. Ready, Willing and Able is better than just Able pretty much any damn day of the week, is all I'm saying.

Hey, maybe it's just Pookie doing a different character. He's versatile, you know.

Cindy, that article's a little scary

I thought it was interesting, though I can't imagine sitting in front of a screen with "probes" to measure reactions. No thanks!

We heard about the plethysmographs in college when you'd volunteer for grad student experiments as part of your undergrad science classes, "really????", but no one I know ever got one of those tests. I just thought the obfuscation was scary, on behalf of the men wondering what the hell it is that women really want. Granted, I'm secretive and repressed myself, but I'm an outlier.

Well, I don't think anyone can ever say what women want, because we are all so different. And I'm sure the same goes for men. I thought it was a nifty observation that women showed signs of arousal at the pictures of the naked woman exercising, but not the naked muscular man. It was hypothesized at one point that it was because the man was not himself sexually aroused, and thus that he wasn't seen as a stimulant. I don't think that's it - but I'm not sure what it is.

"I don't think anyone can ever say what women want ... And I'm sure the same goes for men."

Chicks are so cute when they're young and naive.

Dudes are so cute when they are old enough to know what they are doing.

It doesn't matter what the age spread is or whether her boobs look and feel like they were chiseled out of alabaster -- if you plan to spend more than one night with her make sure you can tolerate her bitching about money...because that time will come.

Well then, such hijacktion this fine weekend. Mrs. Stipe42 took wee-little-step-stipe42 to look at colleges, so I've been all by my lonesome working on the epic master's thesis to end all master's theses, with nary a thought for what perverse dialogues might be afoot on Pajiba over the long cold weekend.

So since I have the house to myself, and monday is my birthday, I shall be calling in sick tomorrow.

One is allowed to be quite drunk by oneself on a Sunday night with a planned sick day looming, especially when one marks one's final birthday before the dread thirties strike their terrible siren song. One is also allowed to use a terrible amount of horribly overused italics in order to emphasize one's complete mastery of html tags whilst whimsically tipsy.

But truly my sweet internet friends, I only started this whiskey soaked ramble in order to pass on the following wisdom:

Optimus re:Bucdaddy's daughter: tis easier to get forgiveness than permission.

wsapnin re:brother needs a nice normal girl: there are no nice normal girls, that's what makes it interesting.

the younger/older man debate: oh yes I have been the 22 year old stud. In fact that's how I ended up with a step child that cannot biologically be mine except by some arcane sorcery or tricks of genetic engineering. I've found that the key to women is simple. Argue with all your might and all your skill. Some will cry or get angry and confused, they are not worth keeping around. Some will never concede the argument even after you've emphatically made love for two hours. The latter are the ones you should keep.

Emasculator: A man who cares that your bosom is lopsided is a charlatan. Anytime you have trouble, just mock him for having lopsided balls, mercilessly. And then refuse to have anything to do with them.

puregonzo: "They said I killed all my cats and ate them". Children are strange the way they are so specific. I remember in junior high we decided that Matt's mom had three penises. Anytime Matt said something, it was like "Shut up Matt, your mom has three penises." He would get hysterical every once and a while "SHE DOES NOT HAVE THREE PENISES!!!" Really Matt, how do you know? Been going down on your mom lately? Seriously, if the fitness of human society were judged by teenagers we would all be burning in hell. In some ways I think that adulthood is extended penance for the shit we pull from ages 10 to 20.

Pookie: I did not attack your mother or you. You said that there were only two types of women in the world, those that you've fucked and those that you're trying to fuck. I merely asked which category your mother fell into. Twas a simple question good sir, easily answered, unless your mother is not a woman at all.

Sabrina: Don't wake up on the bathroom floor. In my solo, drown out the world alcoholism of previous years I learned a wonderfully astute lesson. If you're going to puke, do it in your kitchen sink. Then if you pass out, you'll probably fall all the way to floor and wake back up. In the toilet, you'll probably fall in and drown instead.

egads! I can see the bottom of my tumbler! This must be resolved post haste!

stipe42, I've heard the "it's easier to get forgiveness than permission" edict before and I'll say; not true for some people. I would always ALWAYS have someone ask me first if there is any doubt, because I do not forgive readily. Or at all. It's the Irish in me.

stipe42: 1) There are usually a pile of dishes in our kitchen sink. 2) If I'm at the point where I'm puking, then I also can't stand up long enough to vomit into a sink, even if it is empty. 3) Way easier to flush a toilet than clean a sink. 4) I don't want to wake back up. 5) I think I've passed out on enough bathroom floors to know how to avoid drowning in a toilet, thank you very much.

And Cindy, I thought that article was cool.

The topic is boobs? But it's always boobs!
*cries*
Let's talk about sacks again.

Hmmm, late to the party.

Boobs again, huh? Yeah, mine are kinda big, but in proportion to my frame, and I have a waist, so they don't make me look deform. At least I think so.

Dating older/younger men? Hmm... I need a real man, and if the man happens to be in a young boy's body, then so be it. But no kids under 20 for me. Some guys are pretty smart for their age, but I like guys who can make me feel stupid they're so smart. There's nothing better than a guy you can admire.

Long dickin'? I have yet to have the pleasure.

Oh, and Figgy? "Soy 7 veces más fuerte que tú, y veloz, y siempre estoy de bien humor."

My fellow Pajiblets,

We are truly weekend warriors. We have survived humanity's darkest, dreariest hours and come out slightly battered, certainly fuzzier headed but undaunted, gaining in our mutual misery and sarcasm and lack of social skills the strength to face ... Monday morning.

There are kudos to be handed out.

1. To the immeasurably modest bucdaddy, whose suggestion for and insistence upon the Saturday Night Show Your Ass Thread was the catalyst for this forum, so that we in our abject misery were not forced to deface the Rise of the Lycans thread to declare to the rest of the world: Yes, you are out partying and reveling while we are stuck at work or in our homes, armed only with a keyboard and alcohol and our flashing wits but ... where the hell was I going with this?

Anyway, all hail, bucdaddy!

2. Our esteem'd and gracious host, Dustin, who I hope notices we didn't commandeer the Pajiwagon and drive it off the cliff during this little experiment in free-form commenteering.

All hail, Dustin!

3. Pookie. Font of insight and wisdom.

All hail, Pookie!

4. Evan Williams black label, 86 proof.

All hail, Evan Williams!

5. Boobs and balls.

All hail, boobs and balls! Even the misaligned, stringy ones.

Now ... Some minor matters to clear up before we commit ourselves once again to the dark insanity of the work week:

"If he'd allow me to court his co-ed."

Rhyme, Are you a match for Mozart and Bach? Then give it your best shot.

"I need a real man, and if the man happens to be in a young boy's body, then so be it. ... Long dickin'? I have yet to have the pleasure."

Sofia, I think I see the problem ...

"egads! I can see the bottom of my tumbler! This must be resolved post haste!"

stipe42, Methinks thou dost channel the Bard, good sir!

"LOVE the Spigot."

Lizardqueen, I like that when I asked the bartender to pour me a draft he did it without a word. And when I asked him if he could sell single bottles for take-out, he said, "No." And went back to watching the Steelers-Chargers game.

I knew I was home.

Cletus, I'm glad you're on board. I'll hammer out the details for a marketing campaign and you can hammer out the "lesson plan" with your chew toy.

Hey bucdaddy
Not to get too personal or anything, but for a decent, yet cheap bourbon try Ezra Brooks. Excellent blend of flavors & after 6 or 7 drinks I really appreciate not having to screw with a screw-top (it has a cork).

I know one thing, and that is I don't want my old lady being a SAG award winner.

Walter, Thanks for the tip. I presume Ezra is Foster Brooks' brother, so ish gotta be good *hic* drinking.

Pants, Keep defying gravity, girls! Gravity and age -- fight fight fight! That's the uplifting, well-rounded spirit upon which this country was founded, and shall carry us forth into battle in the present crisis.

Left Boob/Right Boob '12

(Oh, wait ... some of you think they just left office ...)