The Ladies Came Out Of Nowhere To Take Down The Biggest Swinging D*ck In Hollywood At The Box Office
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The Ladies Came Out Of Nowhere To Take Down The Biggest Swinging D*ck In Hollywood At The Box Office

By Joanna Robinson | Miscellaneous | January 10, 2014 | Comments ()


When last we met, I had some disappointing 2013 box office news to report. Only two of the top 100 grossing films of the year were directed by women. That’s pitiful and shameful and upsetting. But I’m back today with some good news. While Hollywood still might be too shy (aka entrenched in ritual sexism) to give women the reins of big budget, widely distributed films, that doesn’t mean it’s all doom and gloom for women in Hollywood. Because when it comes to stories about ladies? Well, 2013 was a banner year.

Last week, in its seventh week in theaters, Frozen was the #1 movie at the box office. That’s bananas. It topped Scorsese’s boys club, Ron Burgundy’s frat house and Tolkien’s sausage fest (with a side of comely elf), Frozen has, all told, raked in over $300 million at the box office. Now it’s not as if Disney films are strangers to female leads. We’ve got a whole sweatshop industry based around the commodifications of princesses. But, arguably, the only other animated films to have raked in over $300 million (The Lion King, Shrek 2 and 3, Toy Story 3, Despicable Me 2, and Finding Nemo) all feature male leads and could be considered easier to market to both the male and the female demographic. (I say “arguably” because I’ve not forgotten about you, Dory.)


But, you know what, the times and the story tellin’, they are a-changin’. As we explored on this very site, the vastly superior Frozen isn’t your typical princess movie. It’s just refreshing to see the obvious effort the filmmakers made to tell a compelling and female-positive story pay off. Literally.

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In other box office news, late in the game, Catching Fire came from behind to topple Iron Man 3 and claim the #1 spot at the box office for 2013. That’s right Tony Stark, the biggest swinging d*ck in Hollywood, was taken down by a girl. What happens when you put a girl in the lead of an action movie, Hollywood? Over $400 million domestic happens. So, for those of you keeping track at home, the top five grossing films of 2013 were The Hunger Games: Catching Fire ($409,389,000), Iron Man 3 ($409,013,994), Despicable Me 2 ($367,983,190), Frozen ($302,590,988 3,742) and Man of Steel ($291,045,518). Two out of five ain’t bad. With Gravity coming in at #7 with $255,805,704, we have to admit that 2013 wasn’t all bad. Especially because I’d much rather see Princess Anna and Queen Elsa or Katniss Everdeen and Dr. Ryan Stone top the box office then, god forbid, Bella Swan. It’s one thing to make a movie with a woman in the lead. It’s another thing entirely to make a great movie with a woman in the lead. If you can make a crapton of money while you do it, all the better. Because there’s one thing Hollywood understands and that’s dollar bills, y’all.


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