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Battleship, Take Notice

By TK | Posted Under Miscellaneous | Comments (17)



StevenColbertSexy.jpg

It’s true. Much like Al Green, gravy, sunshine, nudity and whiskey, Stephen Colbert makes everything better. He can even dull the blow of the past few week’s wretched run of movie news. We already talked about the ridiculosity (shutupit’safuckingword) of the coming Battleship movie to be directed by Peter Berg, as well as its “plot.”

Well, Colbert has officially fired a shot across the bow (see what I — oh, fuck you). He’s made his pitch for a role, and now you can watch him (with a special bonus — Jeff Goldblum!) in all his satirical glory.

The Battleship segment starts at the 3:20 point, but the whole damn clip is brilliant.


The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Tip/Wag - Guns on Amtrak, Fake Lesbians & Battleship Audition
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full EpisodesPolitical HumorHealth Care Protests

Didn’t that make everything better?

You’re welcome.









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Comments

... as well as it’s “plot.”

Or perhaps ITS plot (shutupit’sthefuckingcorrectword).

Posted by: appwitch at September 25, 2009 9:53 AM

Wonderfully wacky.

Posted by: alphawhiskey at September 25, 2009 9:57 AM

That was a nice way to start the morning.

Posted by: annoyingmouse at September 25, 2009 10:11 AM

Flapjack!

I think Berg should hire them, but this should definitely be on Broadway.

Posted by: Cindy at September 25, 2009 10:45 AM

Also thanks to Colbert, I'll also never be able to see Goldblum (RIP?) without being reminded that sleeping with him is like "being caught in a flesh storm with a 90% chance of satisfaction."

Posted by: branded at September 25, 2009 11:45 AM

Awesome way to start the evening.

Posted by: Aislinn at September 25, 2009 12:32 PM

..."Maybe Keanu Reeves". Ha!

Posted by: DoubleH at September 25, 2009 1:00 PM

All better now, yes.

Posted by: stardust savant at September 25, 2009 1:23 PM

Jeff Goldblum = love.

Posted by: kelsy at September 25, 2009 1:31 PM

Keanu Reeves will play the white peg in "Battleship: The Movie."

Ryan Reynolds will play the wee triangle in "Asteroids: The Movie."

I can't wait for the third casting prediction.

Posted by: BWeaves at September 25, 2009 1:35 PM

Katherine Heigl IS Strawberry Shortcake.

You're welcome, BWeaves.

Posted by: Doctor Controversy at September 25, 2009 2:25 PM

FUCK Jeff Goldblum mannn

Posted by: Riles at September 25, 2009 2:53 PM

I wonder when Michael Bay will comment here?

Posted by: George at September 25, 2009 3:10 PM

Grrr...comedy central...you are hangin' by a thread in the mid-30's, female, Canadian, internet havin', Jeff Goldblum desiring demographic. You are warned.

(and yes I know it can be found on Comedy Network, but have you ever tried to find a clip on Comedy Network? It's a huge beatdown.)

Posted by: replica at September 25, 2009 4:30 PM

Doctor Controversy. No, I think it would be something more like:

Katherine Heigl IS the shoe in "Monopoly: The Movie."

Posted by: BWeaves at September 25, 2009 5:13 PM

Dude, you can't silence a revolver.

Posted by: AmbroseKalifornia at September 26, 2009 11:55 AM

So we have "BattleShip: The Movie", and Monopoly being directed by Ridley Scott.
I have the perfect movie for Michael Bay: Connect Four.

"Connect Four!"
"Where?"
"Right there, diagonally."
"Pretty sneaky si-"
BOOOM!!

That, or Jenga.

Posted by: JohnnyT at September 26, 2009 11:19 PM


















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