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The Ten Most Popular Guides of Pajiba’s Five-Year History


A Look Back at Pajiba's Guides to What's Good for You / The Pajiba Staff

Miscellaneous | July 2, 2009 | Comments (28)


The year 2006 was a huge turning point for the site. In May of that year, we debuted our very first Pajiba’s Guide to What’s Good for You, which — for the first time — allowed us to explore movies, books, television, and even music in far more depth than we had previously. This came before the underappreciated gems, the Pajiba Blockbusters, and Hangover Theater, so it was also our first opportunity to look back on films from before the site was conceived in 2004. The Guides were also great because they brought in a lot more eyes to the site, many of whom would stop by and wind up sticking around for years to come. It also created a lot more opportunities for our readers to bitch at us.

Today, because it’s our 5th Anniversary week, I’m taking the opportunity to reintroduce the ten most popular Guides since we started running them. (There are a couple of Guides that would’ve otherwise made the list, but they’ll be along later this week in a different form.) If you haven’t read any of these, they’re a pretty great way to get to know the site, as well as our cultural tastes. In many cases, we also offer a few solid recommendations of books, television, comics, movies, and even Booze.


action-flicksdad.jpgPajiba’s Guide to Testicle-Twisting, Ass-Kicking Flicks: The Best Action Films of All Time

Action flicks are not necessarily the genre for which we are known here at Pajiba, but we are not immune to a quality film that prioritizes the three Bs (blood, bullets, and disemBowelment) over everything else. The list was compiled as such: Each of us ranked our top 20 action films of all time, and the top 15 vote-getters comprised our list, with only one caveat: no comic-book films (saved for a future Guide, perhaps). So, without further ado (and with apologies to our ovarian sistren), here are the Top 15 Nut Twisters of all time.


CastleInTheSky8dd.jpg10 Sci-Fi Films You Should Probably See (But Probably Haven’t)

With this Guide, I’ve tried to bring attention to 10 science-fiction films that largely flew under the radar — underrated or unknown gems that make use of the imaginative bombast of sci-fi through big ideas or unlikely images. They may not all be as visually stimulating as the well-known classics, e.g. Blade Runner or Close Encounters, but they’re just as challenging, and maybe even more rewarding for their ability to connect with the imagination using thought as much as sight.


final11.jpgThe 20 Best Television Seasons of the Last 20 Years

The 20 Best Seasons of the Last 20 Years, laid out in all its splendor. We don’t mean to brag, but agree or disagree with the substance of the list, I don’t know any other website or periodical that’s taken on an endeavor of this size: Extensive, detailed write-ups covering on the some of the smartest, most complex, and most irreverent television shows that have aired over the last 20 years.


crashtest3-thumbdd.jpgEight Films that Should’ve Won Best Picture

I used to think the Oscars were about pure quality. Of course, I also used to believe in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and the notion that love could keep two people together; I’ve come a long way in realizing the error of my ways. I used to watch the Oscars with a sense of excitement and anticipation, hoping that the films I loved would be honored and also secure in the knowledge that whatever judgment was passed down would be sound, and true. But, like I said, I’ve gotten older and wiser since then, and the years of seeing good films passed over for bad ones — the brave ones spurned in favor of the safe ones — have finally gotten to me.This list is to decry those choices, and to try to set right the Academy’s missteps by speaking truth to power and being honest about the films that should have been gifted with the Best Picture statuette but were sadly overlooked.


millions-thumbd.jpgAnybody Wanna Peanut?
Films for Lil’ Pajiba

I’ve been thinking a lot about kid-friendly films of late. In a couple of months, Mrs. Pajiba-hyphenate is due to have Pajiba, Jr., and I’m starting to feel that tingly fatherness well up inside of me whenever I think about what sort of movies I want to inflict on my son.To that end, I’ve formed a Top 10 list of films I plan to show my son when he’s old enough to appreciate them. The criteria for the Top 10 is pretty simple: Aside from limiting the scope to films made in the last generation (20 years) and movies that an 11-year-old could understand (and hopefully value)*, everything else is subjective. In other words, they’re my favorites.


21_anchorma.jpgThe 100 Best Movie Quotes of All Time

There are a number of organizations that have ranked the Top 100 Movie Quotes of All Time, most notably AFI. But whenever you check these Great Quote Lists, they inevitably tend to include the same iconic quotes from Rocky or Casablanca or Titanic, etc. Most of them have been so overused and parodied in pop culture they’ve become quote clichés. They are the quotes your great uncle reels off at family outings in order to sound contemporary. He’s not. And most of those quotes have had their day and should be retired. So, the other day, our readers amassed an incredible list of great movie quotes rarely, if ever, included on lists that count down the 100 Best Quotes of All Time. These aren’t those quotes — they’re the ones you throw back and forth at each other over drinks. The ones you work into conversations. The ones that have become part of the running jokes in your lives.


fight_club_5.jpgAmazing Adventures of Staggering Genius: The Greatest Books of Our Generation

As promised, Pajiba presents The Generation’s Best Books as defined by our readers. I’m sure many will find egregious omissions and outrageous additions, but overall, I think you did a damn fine job — this top 15 list encompasses the high-brow, the sci-fi, the romance, the best sellers, and the cult favorites — much to our dismay, there are even two Oprah selections on the list (we can’t help it that she picks a decent novel on occasion). And certainly arguments could be made for the inclusion of many other books, but it’s hard to argue with the choices below.


boozehoundcecad.jpgThe Boozehound Cinephile

The criteria are straightforward. The film need not be about alcohol, but alcohol must be a central or recurring element. The film must not preach about the sins of boozing — indeed, the successful candidate, while self-deprecating on the subject, will frown upon hectoring. Most important, the film must make me itchy for a snootful of sassy sauce, and not only because I want that happy-happy sliding down my throat, but also because the film kindles the essence and feeling of my best boozy moments. In sum, the film must have a strong theme or backdrop that evokes the joys and rewards of boozing while withholding the lecture.


ba715-thumbdad.jpgThe Cheesiest Soundtrack Singles of All Time

The 1980s and early ’90s were the heyday of classically cheesy soundtracks, back when producers crafted horrible light adult-pop songs to drive the film and boost sales of the soundtrack album. Dozens and dozens of soundtrack albums still come out each year, but many are simply forgettable compilations of pre-existing hits that were used in the film. Some modern soundtracks do rise above their typically niche appeal and experience broader sales but for the most part soundtrack albums don’t have nearly the impact they had even a few years ago, when terrible songs and sometimes terrible movies went hand in hand, resulting in some gloriously awful music. That’s what this list is devoted to: the cheesy singles, almost always created specifically for the film, that get stuck in your head and make you regret ever seeing the movie in the first place. There’s no real room on the list for quality, so keep your bellyachin’ to yourself.


Neeeeeeerd.jpgComics for the Pajiba Mindset

I suspect that the Pajiba readership similarly falls all over the place, and it’s with that in mind that I present this Guide. In particular, I’m catering this discussion to those folks who generally wouldn’t touch a comic book for fear that it would shrink their sexuality and re-virginate them. My goal here is to discuss some comics/graphic novels that I think most Pajiba readers would enjoy, if only they gave themselves the opportunity. So this is not intended to be any “best of” list, although many of these frequently appear on such lists. If you generally trust my opinion and judgments (and how can you not, seeing as how I’m always right?!), go pick one of these up, and I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised.


The Official Pajiba Dictionary | 10 Worst Blockbusters of All Time



Comments

It was cool to look back at the comments. I was able to see who has been here awhile, and who has disappeared.

Posted by: DeistBrawler at June 30, 2009 2:10 PM

The description/review of crash in the "should not have won best picture segment" is probably my favorite bit of scathingness.

"It attacks the issue of modern-day racism with all the sophistication of a college freshman, never stopping to wonder if people fight each other because they’re lonely, or frustrated, or just plain assholes"

I'm glad you included that list. I also think it was one of the site's best.

Posted by: "luker" the barbarian at June 30, 2009 2:16 PM

As for the list of comics:
I adore Sandman and Y: The Last Man (sans ending), and I really like Fables and Bone.
I picked up Maus at a Half-Price this weekend, and it didnt grab me. Maybe I will try again. And the one with the creeeeeeeeeeeepy killer clown on the front - no way in hell.

For the books of our generation, all of those books that I have read, I adore. And I have just started my first Sedaris, so wish me luck.

Posted by: Patty O'Green at June 30, 2009 2:24 PM

So what's the format for commenting on this one? Do you want us to comment on the guides, this page, another thread? Would you like a reach-around with a gentle twist for making this my best lunch hour in months?

Posted by: admin at June 30, 2009 2:26 PM

As much as I love the movie reviews and constant barage of new music on this site, I probably got the most out of that "best books" thread.

Sure, this site has got a lot of interesting perspectives on Music and Film, but the sheer amount (and quality) of recommended reading material has made this a haven for me.

Thanks to Prisco and the Cannonball Read, I'll be busy for years trying to catch up on all of the fantastic books I've missed over the years.

And I suppose Seth is sort of funny too, but we can't all be winners, can we?

Posted by: annoyingmouse at June 30, 2009 2:44 PM

My absolute favorite guide is the "Best Books of our Generation" list. I've read almost all of the books on that list and I've been nothing but impressed by them. They've all been absolutely fantastic books.

The Children's Movies and the Biggest Tearjerkers are my other two favorites. No one compiles a list like Pajiba.

Posted by: figgy at June 30, 2009 2:54 PM

These guide have helped me to become the smug son of a smurf I always wanted to be.

Posted by: badalamenti at June 30, 2009 3:12 PM

As far as films that didn't deserve to win Best Picture, you forgot that mumblemouth crapfest Rocky, which inexplicably beat out All the President's Men, Network and Taxi Driver. America really to see Muhammed Ali get his ass kicked.

Posted by: Tracer Bullet at June 30, 2009 3:41 PM

Hey, there's a couple of those I missed. Or possibly wasn't around for. One or t'other. But I'm going to have fun tonight catching up on them (especially the books one and the comics one. Because what I need it so spend more money I don't really have on books and/or comics).

Posted by: lizzieborden at June 30, 2009 3:45 PM

What about the "Most Bangable Celebrities" Guides? Were they disqualified for some reason?

And speaking of the Most Bangable Guide, when we gettin' that? Have y'all started counting the votes yet?

Posted by: Jerce at June 30, 2009 4:12 PM

i missed some of those i guess i have to go get them to see them

Posted by: payoff debt at June 30, 2009 5:02 PM

What, no mention of Pajiba's Guide to Third-Date Flicks? Call me old school, but that one is my all time favorite.

Posted by: the_wakeful at June 30, 2009 5:04 PM

You know, I took that "Ten Sci-Fi Films" list to heart, because I trusted -- I trusted! -- you guys.

Well thanks very much for "Stalker", and "The Last Battle", dickheads. There's five hours of my life, full of Russian psychobabble and French dystopian ennui, that I won't get back again.

Though, actually, it led me to play the video game of Stalker, which was quite a lot of fun. So I take back the expletive.

I still blame you for "Solyaris", though. And if you've seen one Miyazaki movie, you can pretty much figure out the plots of all the others (though of course the animation is pretty).

Posted by: Neodiogenes at June 30, 2009 6:05 PM

Huh...which two books were on Oprah's book club, by the way?

Posted by: figgy at June 30, 2009 6:07 PM

Though perhaps someday you can also create a list of "kid's" films to absolutely avoid, no matter how furious the tantrum.

That is to say, shoveling aside the utterly obvious dreck (like anything "Pokemon" related), those films that superficially appear good, wholesome children's fare but which in truth are great green stinking globs of saccharine-flavored pus drain.

Top of my list: "The Golden Compass" and "Bridge to Terabithia".

There are many others.

Posted by: Neodiogenes at June 30, 2009 6:12 PM

OK, so maybe Paheeba's Guide to Getting You Laid wasn't Top Ten worthy, but it did help some needledicks 'round here get a taste of Special Valleys.

Posted by: Sofía at June 30, 2009 6:24 PM

"The 20 Best TV Seasons" is what brought me to Pajiba. That's when I knew I found something special. Special good, not special slow.

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at June 30, 2009 6:29 PM

The year 2006 was a huge turning point for the site. The Guides were also great because they brought in a lot more eyes to the site, many of whom would stop by and wind up sticking around for years to come.

You're right. When I first came across the site in 2006, it was bombarded with all these awesome guides. I've always thought that the guides were Pajiba's best feature (they still are). Of this list, my favorite is the best books one, but I agree with the_wakeful, where is the third-date flicks one?

Posted by: Katie (KP) at June 30, 2009 7:02 PM

The Boozehound is always my favorite read. I could make sweet, sweet love to his mou...er...words all day. And some great movie/drink combos.

I have a sneaking suspiscion that the Paheeba's Guide to Getting You Laid will get it's own special mention Sofia.

Heh, MelBivDevoe, nice.

Posted by: admin at June 30, 2009 7:23 PM

Not sure if this pertains to this column, but the funniest thing I ever read on Pajiba which had me on the floor laughing - was (I think it was Dustin)'s review of "March of the Penguins."

Posted by: Julia at June 30, 2009 7:26 PM

The top books was my favourite post ever. I am (slowly) making my way through all of them. I finished AHWOSG last week (not what I expected, but loved it) and am currently reading Good Omens which is hilarious so far. I hope we can do more guides like it, but maybe more specilizaed so that we can drag the joy out? Eg. top 15 fantasy books, top 15 'classics', top 15 kind-of-embarassed-to-admit-that-I-like-it-so-much-but-I-really-do books (eg, I have an abiding love for Da Vinci Code, despite recognizing it's many (MANY) shortcomings. Please do not revoke my Pajiban membership!)

Posted by: JJ McClay at June 30, 2009 9:52 PM

Umm, specilizaed = specialized.

Posted by: JJ McCLay at June 30, 2009 9:53 PM

I'm agreeing with Figgy. The books guide is my absolute favorite, turning me on to books I ended up really appreciating. More book guides!

Posted by: Lex at June 30, 2009 10:19 PM

I am a huge fan of the Guide to Third Date Flicks. In fact, I used flicks as a barometer to test my compatibility with my (now) boyfriend. On our second date, he pulled out Arrested Development...and I knew he was a keeper. I tested him with The Royal Tenenbaums and he pulled out Y Tu Mama Tambien, and we're still together after 16 months. Thanks, Pajiba, for making my film viewing so memorable!

Posted by: bonnie at July 1, 2009 12:10 AM

Never knew about the Comic's Guide. What a find!

Posted by: ceejeemcbeegee at July 1, 2009 1:44 AM

Shit, I'm getting old! I'm all over the comments in that Comics post and I didn't even remember. Pass me those rest home brochures.

Posted by: ceejeemcbeegee at July 1, 2009 1:47 AM

For Y: The Last Man, here is a link where you can download a free pdf of the entire first issue.
http://ylastman.blogspot.com/2007/12/free-download-y-last-man-issue-1.html
I did this the other day, and it has kept me entertained at work all week!

Posted by: Patty O'Green at July 1, 2009 9:17 AM

Aww, I love these guides!!

The most memorable one for me, though, was the Tearjerkiest Moments list. This is mostly because I read it at work and everyone thought someone in my family had died because I was sitting in my office, bawling away.

Posted by: Livience at July 4, 2009 7:04 AM